Mad Elf's Diary of a Scumbag

"Bad uncle, bad uncle! Look, what is Uncle Niu doing?"

A petite figure trotted in, bringing flakes of snow into the kitchen.

Lance, who was wrapped in a blanket and lazing in front of the stove, was pulled by Marina to look out the door.

The golden boar's big head was chopped off and placed in the snow in the south of the yard.

Torun's figure, as burly as an iron tower, was kneeling in front of the pig's head with his hands raised to the sky, howling words that no one could understand.

"Oh, they are offering sacrifices to the ancestors, and they will take out the pig brains and throw them on the roof. It's a pity that the pig brain flowers can't be eaten."

"Ah, why, isn't that a waste of food?"

Marina had eaten the pig brain flakes made by Lance. At this time, she looked at the huge pig head with doubts in her eyes.

If you take this out, how many tricks can you do!

"It's traditional, of course you have to waste a little bit."

Lance picked up Marina's little body and put his cool hands into her clothes.

"Come on, Marina, use your belly to warm uncle's hands!"

As soon as Lance put his hand in, Marina screamed and jumped up.

Then he lifted up Lance's clothes and stuffed his cold hands inside.

"Okay, okay, let's go out and play! Don't make trouble in the kitchen."

After finally coaxing Marina out, Julia saw no one and got back in again.

Lance looked up and saw that Julia's fair and lovely face was filled with a shy blush, which of course might be due to the cold.

"Ahem! Well, Julia, how is your brother?"

Lance's eyes looked at the girl's body unscrupulously, and he reminded her vaguely.

"Thank you, thank you master. My brother is already awake. Can you let me attend the banquet later?"

Julia's hands were tangled in front of her, and her amber eyes were filled with nervousness.

She knew best what was going on with her brother. Without the help of noble people, Robert would have been just a black soldier for the rest of his life.

If he can be accepted by Lance and the others, even if he is just given a casual job, then Robert will have nothing to worry about for the rest of his life.

Lance looked at Julia up and down with playful eyes, how could the little girl's thoughts be hidden from him.

"Of course, but you have to be sensible, right?"

Lance hooked his hand at her and said:

"My nutrition has kept up recently, but I don't know if my growth has kept up."

"Come here quickly and let me check your body, Master!"

Julia looked back and saw that no one was paying attention to the situation here, so she closed her eyes and walked over boldly.

When Lance saw Julia walking in front of him, he lifted up her cotton robe with an evil smile.

Looking at her fair and flat belly, he swallowed his saliva and put his cool hand inside.

"Where are the people from Lance? Even if you come to help, you have to boil hot water!"

Karina, who was washing pig intestines, rubbed her cold and red hands and asked doubtfully.

"Lance is hiding in the kitchen and lazing around. I just saw Julia go in and she couldn't get out within half an hour."

With a look of disgust on her face, Cecilia turned over the stomach of the golden boar and cleaned it.

When Karina asked him, she, who had long been dissatisfied with Lance, immediately stood aside and got angry.

"You rebelled against him! Even if you are lazy, you still dare to eat! Marina! Go and get the rolling pin, and I will personally ask him to come out."

"Bad uncle, he doesn't even call me when he eats!"

Marina immediately brought the rolling pin, and Karina took it and walked in aggressively.

A few seconds later, Julia rushed out of the kitchen, clutching her chest.

His innocent face turned red, and he didn't dare to look up when he saw anyone.

"Sister Julia! What delicious food have you eaten?"

But Marina was still shouting loudly.

"No! I didn't eat anything!"

Julia immediately screamed, and then everyone looked over with playful eyes.

"Me! I'm going to boil water!"

Julia could only cover her face and run away.

"Father, Queen, I want to go home!"

Cecilia straightened up from the bench and let out a long sigh, feeling only pain in her back and hands cramping.

Looking at the filth on her hands, Cecilia wanted to cry.

They actually asked the princess of a country to clean the pig's water. She only learned this word in the morning.

"Damn Lance! Damn Karina! You actually let me wash your hands! Sooner or later! Sooner or later!"

Cecilia murmured, but deliberately lowered her voice to prevent others from hearing what she said.

Lilina raised her sleeves and wiped the hair stained on her face.

Then he turned around and looked into the kitchen in confusion.

"Didn't Sister Karina go to catch Lance? Why didn't she make any move? Could it be?"

The filled pig urine bubble was kicked to the branch by Marina.

At this time, she was grabbing Torun's horns, stepping on Torun's shoulders and pulling at him with a stick.

Torun was happy to play with the child and let Marina do whatever she wanted.

"Uncle Niu, you like children so much, why don't you get married and have one yourself?"

"Moo! My dad said that only weaklings like women. Real men want to have sex with men!"

"Well... Uncle Niu, it's a miracle that you were born!"

Today is the practice wine for Liszt, so naturally he should take the main seat.

After this meal, it was time for Liszt to set off to travel the continent with Catherine.

If nothing else happens, Liszt will not be able to see the snow scene next year.

But he didn't show any sadness. Instead, he took advantage of the snow scene and lively atmosphere to compose a poem in the yard.

Even though it made no sense, everyone still cheered loudly and praised his smelly feet.

Since it is a pig killing convention, the main ingredient is of course pork.

In addition to Lance's braised pork, everyone made a specialty dish to see Liszt off.

Torun's stir-fried pork whip, Lilina's pork and pickled cabbage stewed vermicelli, Cecilia's fried meatballs, and Julia's offal soup.

As well as Karina's stir-fried pork sausage, and Catherine's golden pork loin roasted with dragon flame.

Even Marina grilled a pig tail, making an indelible contribution to this wine practice.

What would be accomplished without wine? The royal salute that the three of them had once looted the Demon Clan's palace was drank down to the last drop on this day.

After drinking and eating, Liszt didn't show much pretense. After saying goodbye to everyone, he got up and left with Catherine.

"No need to send it off. There is no need for us to work hard on the scene."

Outside the door of Torun's mansion, Liszt and Catherine walked together in white robes and white horses.

They are like a couple of gods and immortals, which is very enviable.

"Moo! Liszt, I don't know what to say."

"This is the Baibian wine I brewed. I didn't give it to Lance before he asked for it, so I kept it for him to drink slowly on the way!"

Torun didn't say goodbye, he just took out a jar of medicinal wine and handed it to Liszt.

After Liszt took it with a smile, Lance, who had been silent, also spoke.

"Liszt, I heard that the extreme north of the continent is responsible for the formation of strong winds that are difficult for even demigods to cross."

"It's because an alien god fell there."

Seeing Liszt looking over suddenly, Lance shrugged his shoulders and said easily:

"I don't know if what is written in the Elf Secret Code is true. If you have a chance, help me check it out."

Perhaps the news that Lance said was too exciting, the horse's legs under Catherine's crotch immediately went limp and he knelt on the ground.

Toren immediately looked around alertly, as if he was about to take action at any time.

Liszt also had a look of shock in his eyes. After taking a deep look at Lance, he nodded solemnly and said:

"I'll be there."

After watching the two figures disappear from sight, Lance gently raised his head, looked at the wind and snow in the sky and said:

"The snow is getting heavier and heavier."