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Chapter 24 Emotional Quotient: Emotions (2)
One should know that one's actions are the result of one's own choice.Regardless of the circumstances, you are responsible for your actions.It can be said that there is a sense of self-motivation in people, that is, to make full use of emotional information, to rectify emotions to achieve the best state of energy and vitality, and to adaptively set goals and creatively achieve goals.

Self-motivation means that a person actively pursues goals.For a person with high emotional intelligence, he will take the initiative to complete his work instead of waiting for others to urge him.Self-motivation also means that a person has the awareness of "open learning", he will constantly accept new knowledge, and constantly improve and enrich his knowledge structure.It is easier for him to develop and progress than a person whose consciousness is completely closed.Self-motivation also means "responsible for loyalty". For a person with high emotional intelligence, he will be faithful to his promise and be responsible for his actions instead of shirk or make excuses.

In life and work, those with high emotional intelligence can be "realistic and persistent" for a long time in the face of difficulties. He can rigorously engage in his own work and strengthen his beliefs, instead of holding on to "just don't do it" mentality.

Whether a person has a sense of responsibility for his own behavior (a strong self-motivation mentality) largely determines the size of his achievements.

When you find a new job, many people have this kind of confusion: the boss always says that the newcomer lacks a sense of responsibility and prevents us from doing many important things. It is really depressing!At the same time, these newcomers don't know if they can do one thing well, and they dare not do many things.Some people think that the company they chose at the beginning was very good, and they were full of confidence when they first started working.However, before the probationary period expired, he lost interest in work.

Their doubts lie in: "Is there something wrong with their abilities, or is the company worse than they thought?"

In fact, the reason why newcomers have such confusion is because they lack workplace and work experience, and their emotional intelligence level is not high.

Next, let me compare two examples.

Example [-]:

Feng Jun is a newcomer who has just graduated from a technical school and started to work. During the probationary period, he encountered great distress.He said that he did not know what he learned during this period.Every day, the head of the department would give him tasks, and he would do it according to the requirements of the head, but he never thought about whether this job was suitable for him, or how promising he would be here.In order to survive, he wanted to continue working here, but he was tired of his mechanical work.He can't lift his spirits every day, and the work at hand is dull to him.

Example [-]:
There is a famous TV producer named Chen Guanglu in Taiwan.When he started working in the TV station, the station only asked him to be a very small program assistant.At that time, the assistant was a guy who did chores. Not only did he have to do all the chores, but he often worked overtime with extremely low wages.Chen Guanglu soon lost interest in this job. He felt that his future was bleak, and he had the idea of ​​changing jobs.At this time, his friend told him that it is not easy to find a job outside, so it is better to work here and wait, maybe you can wait for the opportunity.His friend's words inspired him, and he understood that every chore he was doing now was accumulating for future development and paving the way for opportunities to succeed.So, he decided to continue working in this position.With the deepening of his work, he gradually became interested in TV production. Although he only worked as a small assistant, he followed the producer and worked hard.Two years later, he planned the special program "Jun on the Frontier" of the famous singer Teresa Teng, which was approved by the TV station.After the show was launched, it caused a sensation in Taiwan, so he was nominated for the Golden Bell Award.

Through these two examples, we can see how important it is for a person to have a sense of self-motivation that is responsible for himself.Without the awareness of being responsible for oneself, it is difficult to find direction at work.They may have worked hard when applying for a job, but they lose interest in the job after taking up the job, without any respect for the profession and a sense of mission.They often doubt whether their choices are correct or not, and at the same time compare their work with that of others in private to see which one is more ideal.Such a person can only live up to the expectations of the employer and ruin his own future.

Facing the same predicament, Chen Guanglu pondered and reflected on his future. He knew that everything he did must be responsible for the future, which is also a kind of accumulation.As a result, his professional sense became sharper, and he grasped the chance of success.

We should remember that a person is nothing but a self-portrait of oneself—the result of a series of self-choices.Regardless of whether this choice is active or passive, it is a choice, and you must be responsible for your own choice.Only with an attitude of being always responsible to oneself can one have a higher emotional intelligence and be more likely to achieve success in life and work.

Maintain an "empty glass mentality"

What is the mentality of an empty cup?I will tell a story related to Zen for illustration.

Once upon a time, there was a man with profound attainments in Buddhism. He heard that there was a respectable old Zen master in a certain temple, so he went to visit.The apprentice of the old Zen master came to receive him, and he showed a very arrogant mood, thinking: Who are you, how can you have the right to receive me?Later, the old Zen master received him very respectfully and made tea for him.But when pouring water, the cup was already full, and the old Zen master kept pouring it.He puzzled and asked: "Master, the cup is already full, why do you still have to pour it in?" The master said, "Yes, since it is full, what is the use?"

The meaning of this Zen master is obvious: "Since you are already very knowledgeable, why do you still come to me for advice?" This is the origin of the "empty cup mentality".

The so-called "empty cup mentality" is understood in EQ theory as a person who has the courage to let go, and has the mentality of returning everything to zero. It means that a person dares to let go of his past achievements and brilliance, and start everything from scratch.Having this kind of mentality shows that a person has a high emotional intelligence.He can adapt to changes in the outside world faster and make greater progress.

Today we are in a rapidly changing world, whether it is the market environment, organizational structure or goals and tasks will change.As an independent individual, we cannot freely choose our environment.Therefore, we must improve our emotional intelligence and have the courage to let go of the past, so that our working methods and styles can be adjusted and changed with the environment as soon as possible to better adapt to work and life.

In fact, when we engage in a job for a long time, we will have many habitual working methods and thinking patterns.This is very beneficial to us, because the experience summed up and accumulated in the past can enable us to complete one thing with ease, so as to save time and improve efficiency.However, the habitual thinking mode and working method may also make us get used to it, follow the past experience with peace of mind, and even go to the extreme of rigid thinking and rote.

Changing this state is difficult.Because everyone's career experience is very different.In the past work, some people had a higher starting platform, or worked very hard personally, or were appreciated by the leader by chance, or were helped by team members, and they may achieve greater achievements.These achievements create a strong inertia in the heart, which makes people have a sense of superiority and satisfaction in the subconscious, so they unconsciously refuse to accept and change.

The consequences of refusing to change are brutal.The new environment will not recognize your past achievements, but care about what you can do now.If you only care about past achievements, you will soon get lost in the new environment and face one failure after another.

Therefore, the first step in cultivating high thinking and emotional intelligence and having an "empty cup mentality" is to forget the past glory.What you did yesterday is just a result of the past and has nothing to do with today or the future.

Now that you have come to a new work environment, never take the past seriously.You must realize that no matter how much experience you have accumulated and how many glory you have experienced before, those can only represent the past, not the future.

The only constant in the world is "change". Past achievements are just a reference, which can only tell you a certain state in the past, and cannot determine the future direction, but only "now" can determine the future.

Therefore, when you step into a new environment, if you have a brighter mentality now, you can quickly shorten the distance with your colleagues; if you have a humble attitude now, you can learn and master new skills as soon as possible; The help and guidance of many colleagues.

It is very difficult for a person to let go of his past achievements, and it is not easy for him to forget his past pain.Improving emotional intelligence and cultivating an "empty cup mentality" requires us to start all over again and continue to surpass.

We all know that a person's career cannot be smooth sailing, and occasional setbacks and failures are inevitable.Immature timing, unclear plans, unclear goals, insufficient resources, etc. are all reasons for failure.Of course, a person's career will be frustrated due to unsatisfactory salary or dislike of personality and colleagues, and he will be full of grievances.

Faced with such a situation, we must learn to empty the past and start all over again, without being troubled by the pain of the past.If you enter a new company and face a new environment, you need to realize that there will also be difficulties here.However, you should not escape or deny yourself, but take the initiative to find a solution, find your own gaps and shortcomings, and find the direction you should work hard.Completely abandon the thoughts of laziness and dawdling, and start everything from scratch.

If you are in a new company, you should regard the present as the beginning, regard colleagues as objects of study, and accept voices from different sides.At the same time, it is also necessary to break the conservative view and welcome new things.If you dare to start from the details, start from small things, and accumulate more, then your hard work and professionalism will naturally win the trust and recognition of your colleagues.

A person with high emotional intelligence should not only cultivate his "empty cup mentality" in the face of external changes, but also regard zeroing as a normal state and develop the habit of empty cups.

(End of this chapter)