[Net King] Take away my heart

Life is a farce that everyone plays. —Jean Nicolas Arthur Rimbaud

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After taking the medicine, the mother's waking time increased significantly, and she was no longer so moody.

But along with the side effects of taking the medicine, the mother's hands began to have a nervous twitching movement, often shaking non-stop when she couldn't control it.

My mother actively said that she would help me lighten the burden, help me do this and that, and even really helped me wash my clothes and cook for me when I was not paying attention.

Eating my mother's long-lost handmade dishes at the dinner table, I was so moved that I almost wanted to cry.What a familiar smell, what a nostalgic smell, as if the gentle and kind mother had really returned.But inadvertently, my eyes fell on my mother's hand, that trembling hand...but it reminded me all the time that my mother was not really healed.

My mother will still call me, no matter class or get out of class, school or school, as soon as I leave her sight, she will call me desperately as if she can't find the direction.

It's useless to persuade my mother not to call me anymore, and of course it's impossible to turn off the phone as before, otherwise I can't imagine what kind of things my mother who was stimulated would do.

Occasionally my mother seemed to be getting better, and I figured a phone call would be a way to reassure each other.My mother can find her sense of security by calling me, and I can use my mother's phone to confirm that she is okay.

As long as she can call me, my mother can maintain a relatively stable mental state-for this reason, I chose to be patient.

After the father and mother separated, the mother has never worked, and all the family's sources of income are still maintained by the father's income.

Every month, my father would regularly send us a check.Although he never appeared in person, there was always more than enough money from my father, so our life was as rich as ever.

My mother rarely opened the mailbox, and I always collected the letters and checks at home.I don't know why my mother had the whim to open the mailbox that time, and just happened to get the check from my father.

Staring at the check and the handwriting of my father's signature on the check, my mother said to me quietly: "Hidesuke hasn't come back for a long time."

I froze for a moment.How long has it been since I heard my father's name from my mother?When I was very young, my mother was already arguing with my father. She hated him so much that she gritted her teeth and regarded everything related to him as taboo. Naturally, it was impossible to mention my father's name.

However, everything changed completely from the time my mother received that check.

My mother suddenly started talking about my father, always telling me "Your father is out fooling around again? How long has he been home? Have you seen him? Who is he with?"—— These are questions I don't know how to answer.

My mother's memory seemed to suddenly go back to the moment when they just started quarreling. At that time, my mother was not hysterical, she was just crying and fussing, but she would still go out to find him while complaining about her father.

"Birus, your father is missing...I can't find him!"

One day, my mother cried to me on the phone.

What is this new trick?Because I was worried about my mother's condition, I left school early and rushed home from school.In the end, my mother didn't do anything out of the ordinary, she just kept crying in front of me, insisting that I go out and get my father back.

"Mom, Dad also has a job, he's just working...and he hasn't been home for a long time, even if you want me to find him..."

"Liar! There must be a vixen seducing him, so he didn't come back! Why, why? What did I do wrong...? Why did he abandon our mother and son..."

My mother cried so hard that I couldn't help but cry until midnight that day.

I'm not sure whether my mother's memory has gone backwards or forward, maybe she has suppressed her father's memory all these years, and the distortion caused by this suppression caused her to find balance by hurting Erina.And now, Erina is no longer her target, and her mother's memory has been revived through the handwriting on that check, so she started looking for her father again.

After that, the mother's daily task became to look for her father everywhere.

When she went out alone when I was not at home, walked aimlessly up and down the street, lost her way, and even forgot what she was doing, she would call me, so I had to look up again. The teacher hurried over to pick up his mother and go home.

"Mom, it's dangerous to go out alone, don't do it again!"

When repeated exhortations were useless, I couldn't help but yelled at my mother, but I didn't expect my mother to cry like this.

"Why, why didn't he come home...why...what did I do wrong..."

My mother covered her face and cried very sadly, and I couldn't help but fall silent.

"Birus, do you know where your father is, right?... He must have a new love, right... those vixens... those shameless things... which one is it? Is it the one in the cafe? Or the one sitting in the bar? The one on stage?"

"I don't know. Mom, I really don't."

"You lied to me!" My mother yelled at me, "You all lied to me! He must have given you a lot of money!? Even you were bribed... Are you also on your father's side? Even you...even you!"

"No, I didn't... Mom, calm down...!"

The out-of-control mother grabbed my shoulder with tears all over her face.

"Birus, you have to help mother, mother only loves you, you are a good child of mother!... If you don't even help me, what's the point of my life?"

I stared wide-eyed and looked at my mother with distress.

"Help me, help me, I want to find him...I want to find him..."

"...Understood, I will go to him."

I have no choice but to promise my mother.After hearing my answer, the poor mother showed an expression that seemed to be both crying and laughing.

She hugged me, put her arms around my neck and whispered in my ear, good boy, good boy, my good boy.

I just felt that my heart sank more and more, sank more and more, and finally sank into a bottomless black hole.

The day when I came to wait for him under my father's office building, the weather was very sunny.

The people coming and going under the office building are all business elites in well-fitting suits, which is a matter of course, because my father is also one of them.

Obtaining a lawyer's license at a young age, the winning rate is always far higher than that of people of the same age, always waving the flag for the righteous side, the respected barrister Yagyu Takasuke...

I was so proud of my father.

"Bilus will become a barrister like Dad in the future, right?"

"Well! Dad is the best!"

Under the clear sky, my immature and ignorant voice echoed.

My father was an irreplaceable hero in my mind when I was a child.My father is a rare legal genius, relying on his talents to earn a lot of money, so that my mother and I can live a carefree and prosperous life.His father is even very talented. Outside of work, he is still a sports-loving and sentimental person. His father has read a lot of books, can make delicious black tea, and can also play a very good golf game.

"Come on, you have to hold this hand, stand firm, and you can't just rely on brute force when you swing out..."

It is a joy to spend time with my father.

My father would take me to the golf course and teach me how to play golf hand in hand.No matter how badly I played at that time, my father would not be angry. Instead, he would laugh and encourage me and say, it’s okay, take your time, and you can definitely practice well.

Since when did such a kind father change?

I looked up at the boundless clear sky. The sky in front of me was still as blue and beautiful as the sky in my childhood. It was so blue that it made people feel happy in a trance.

But my father today is different from the one who taught me how to play golf.

When he came out of the building, Dad was holding a strange woman's waist.The two leaned close to each other, not caring about the eyes of the surroundings, talking and laughing happily while walking.

It was a woman who was younger than her mother, more talkative than her mother, and had a prettier smile than her mother.

…………dad.

I cried out heavily.

Seeing me coming to find him, my father showed a hint of surprise. He whispered something to the woman beside him, then sent her to a taxi, paid at the window and kissed her goodbye.

Then, my father came here.

"Birus, why are you here?"

I tried my best to suppress the shock and unhappiness brought about by the scene just now, trying to tell myself to smile or calm down, but I found it difficult to breathe even standing up.There was an unbearable bitterness surging in my chest, and this sour feeling that was about to flood my throat made it difficult for me to greet my father like ordinary people.

"The person just now... who is it?"

"It's an acquaintance of my father's."

Consistently confident tone, relaxed and easy look.This expression of my father has not changed since he was a child. Whether he is facing me or facing the judge, he seems to be [-]% sure of victory.

A liar, a liar, a scoundrel who opens his eyes and tells nonsense when he takes money.People who lost their lawsuits in court have also spat and scolded their father like this, but his father has never been moved, because this is his profession.

This look on my father's face disgusted me.This kind of expression that can easily lie to anyone, and can tell a series of lies without blushing without drafting, makes me feel disgusted from the bottom of my heart.

"You came to me specifically because you have something to say? Come on, don't just stand here, sit in Dad's office. It's just a lunch break, and I haven't seen you for a long time. Let's have lunch and chat ..."

"It was my mother who sent me to find you."

I coldly refused, and my father stretched out his hand to take me.

"My mother has been in poor health recently, and she always cries at home. Erina is still young, and I am busy studying... The situation at home is very difficult."

"Didn't I send money every month?"

"It's not something that can be solved by sending money every month. No matter how much money ... your people are not there."

Father sighed at me.

"I've done what I can. I've always sent you a lot of money, and I haven't missed a penny. If you have so much money and you still have to complain...then I'm afraid there's nothing I can do."

"........."

I clenched my fist silently.

The distress in my chest turned into grief and anger at this moment, and I really wanted to leave like this, leaving my irresponsible father and this hateful place.But I can't, I still have things that I promised my mother but didn't finish.

"Mom, she... thought about committing suicide. Because you abandoned us and this family, she has been very sad and can't think about it. Even Erina can't take care of her... Do you really have the heart? Even if you hate your mother, at least Hui Rina is your daughter, she is still young and needs someone to take care of her..."

When Erina's thin body appeared in my mind, my heart tightened for a while.

All along, what kind of torture Hui Rina has been suffering on behalf of her father, her father has no idea.And he still lives so easily and comfortably, without troubles or pains, thinking that as long as he gives money, he has fulfilled his responsibilities, and even has fun and has fun.

It's not fair...it's not fair.

"Your mother is crazy, she should have gone to the hospital long ago."

When his mother was mentioned, his father's tone became unusually indifferent.

I know, I know my mother should go to the hospital, I knew it early on, but...

"I know she should go to the hospital, but you are the one who made her become like this!"

It's my father's fault, it's all my father's fault.I felt something gripping my throat and I couldn't breathe.Don't shirk responsibility anymore, don't look at me with that indifferent look, don't torture me and my mother anymore...

"Birus, you are my son. You have the same excellent qualities as me, haven't you been like this since you were a child? You can play golf like me, read books like me, and have unique talents like me. Wisdom, you will definitely stand out in the future, Dad has always attached great importance to you, Dad will not let you be caught by that lunatic..."

My father stretched out his hand to me again, and he showed the kind expression he had when he was a child. It was an expression he only had when facing me.His hope for me, his confidence in me, and his affirmation of his own excellent bloodline are placed in that expression.

My father tried to pat me on the shoulder.

--"Do not touch me!"

I cried out and opened my father's hand violently.My father froze, obviously confused by my overreaction.

So dirty, so dirty.Don't touch me with your dirty hands, don't, don't, don't.

What floated in front of my eyes was the appearance of my father walking out of the building with his arms around the woman. His hands were on her waist, moving down from time to time.That woman's frivolous smile, contrived posture, rich and cheap perfume smell, the sound of stepping on thin high-heeled shoes... everything made me sick.

Father's lovers, father's lovers, father must have done such things with many women.Not mothers, but those dirty and nasty women, those shameless, lowly and stupid women, those women with germs and stinking all over their bodies...

I can't stand it, I can't stand it.

I want to vomit, I want to vomit, I want to vomit.

"Hirus...!?"

Regardless of my father's stop, I escaped from the place full of germs and rot.

I was running wildly on the road, and the strong vomiting made me unable to stop.

The world is spinning, the world is spinning.

Where is the house?where is motherWhere is Erina?Where is my shelter?

The whole world is a terrible cage. I was trapped in it, running around, struggling and screaming, but no one could hear or see.

No one can help me.

I suddenly felt so miserable.

The author has something to say: New news continues to be announced~

Dangdangdangdangdang——"Take My Heart" has decided to publish a custom book~(≧▽≦)/

This custom book is expected to start ordering in April ~ the content is super rich v

In addition to including unpublished special episodes, there are also unique character covers specially drawn by hand ← beautiful to bursting XDD

Details will be announced in the future~The cover design, etc. will also be released here in advance~

Please be sure to pay attention~ XDD