【Chenghua】Your hand in mine

On the avenue, it doesn't look like a night cruise.It’s best not to, Kakyoin thought, the eyes injured in the early years are a little night blind, and it’s a bit reluctant to follow him in the middle of the night. He walked at the same speed tens of meters behind Jotaro, walked two blocks from the residential area, and crossed a road. The trail turned a few more turns, and finally stopped by a river.

The Pope ran out by himself and moved towards Jotaro uncontrollably. Kakyoin was startled and reluctantly took back his double.The moon came out from the clouds, and he moved a little closer to the woods, never leaving Jotaro's eyes, alone, wearing the stars and wearing the moon, riding that black back, silently tied to Kakyoin, tighter than ever before.He saw it, heard it, felt it, the old wound on his eyelid was aching, Jotaro's wound was also hurting, he knew that this time it had nothing to do with intuition.

PTSD, Post-Traumatic Stress Syndrome, this word is heard from the conversation between doctors and nurses, and Kakyoin's parents are also present.When they were talking, Kakyoin was lying in the new ward, the original one was completely destroyed beyond recognition, the windows were broken, the glass was spilled all over the floor, mixed with the broken water glasses that fell on the ground, and the instruments were smashed to pieces , scratches all over the wall, even the chairs were lifted.When people arrived following the loud noise, Kakyoin was lying in the middle of the ruins, her clothes torn into strips, and her body still had wounds cut by broken glass.

Surveillance showed that no one entered his room, and all the evidence indicated that the vandalism was done by Kakyoin. His parents obviously couldn’t accept this statement, especially his mother, who cried and said that the demon must have returned to Dianming’s side, the voice Loud enough to be heard throughout the corridor.Kakyoin was lying on the bed with his eyes open, and then closed them when his parents came in. His mother's hand next to him was so cold that there was no warmth at all.Father said you need to get well soon, his eyelids moved, and they were still tightly closed when they left.

But Kakyoin didn't want to fall asleep at all, even closing his eyelids was a torment for him.As soon as the lights are turned off at night, the yellow sand in the open wind rushes towards the face, and the vampire walks nimbly in the trap he set up, like a yellow spider.The world couldn't help him. In the still time, the red cloak was very close, and the fangs exuded the cold air of hell. The vampire raised his fist and said this into his ear.

"Kakyoin."

Nightmares haunted him night after night.Kakyoin woke up again and again, the pajamas were soaked with cold sweat on his back, dried and then wet again.His spirit became very poor, and he couldn't sleep or eat at night. After the lake burst, the Pope reacted first, desperately shooting emerald spray at his imaginary enemy.The people in the hospital said that the compensation was paid by someone else, but this did not play a comforting role. The prison of the nightmare was hanging above his head, and it would fall down at any time to imprison him. , alone and helpless.

Until the day Jotaro Kujo came.Kakyoin refused all meetings, and of course Jotaro was blocked from the door, but he forced his way in with a very bad expression.

"Why don't you take your medicine?"

"I'm not sick."

Jotaro looked at his bandaged arm, remembered what the doctor said, broke off the medicine, poured a glass of water and put it in front of Kakyoin.Platinum Star appeared behind him with the same serious expression.

"If you don't eat it, I will find a way to make you eat it."

"Jotaro, what do you mean? Are you threatening me?"

Jotaro neither threatened him nor opened his mouth to force-feed him. Instead, he stuffed the medicine into his mouth and swallowed it under the water with a gurgling sound.Kakyoin stared at his Adam's apple moving up and down in a daze.

"……What do you mean."

"Test the poison for you." Jotaro wiped his mouth, opened two capsules again, and handed them over. "It's not poisonous, eat it."

Kakyoin couldn't laugh or cry, and felt bored, so he took the medicine and water.He still doesn't really want to take it. Although the people in the hospital tried their best to coax them, there was fear in their eyes. It seemed that Kakyoin would harm others, and it made him uncomfortable to think about it. But if he threw away the medicine, Jotaro would definitely not be able to pass the test .He could only eat with a frown.

Since then, Jotaro has come every day to supervise him to take medicine, or to have a check-up.Receiving treatment was easier than imagined, and the number of nightmares decreased day by day, and then disappeared.

Kakyoin thanked Jotaro for his help and secretly laughed at his own weakness, but he didn't expect the same pain and stubbornness to appear on Jotaro many years later.That once high-spirited boy was lonelier than himself, and Jotaro hid the news very well, and he didn't even receive a phone call of condolences.How many days and nights did he soak himself?Kakyoin thought about it, and returned home early, before Jotaro could act.The eyes were open all night, the door was closed for the fourth time, and the sleepless souls were added to the second.

In a week, Jotaro went out four or five times at night, each time Kakyoin carefully followed him to the river and hid in the woods.Jotaro didn't do anything by the river, just sat on the concrete floor in a daze, and occasionally took out a lighter and made it rattle.The weather was still cool, and the summer insects were still sleeping in the ground, Jotaro's breaths and exhalations brought up a cloud of white mist, which seemed extremely long.

"Let's talk." Kakyoin walked into the moonlight and walked to the river, and there was still a distance.Jotaro looked back at him, not surprised, as if he had planned it long ago, when the other party came to him, he consciously stepped aside and asked Kakyoin to sit down.The concrete floor carried Jotaro's body temperature, Kakyoin handed over a can of coffee, which he kept in his arms, it was still warm.

"What are you going to talk about?" Jotaro asked, pulling the gag.

"Aren't you going to explain the behavior? Run out in the middle of the night four or five times a week, don't talk to me for a walk."

"You can also explain why you know so well."

Jotaro was on his left, the injured half of his face was facing him, his eyes were slightly open, unable to read any emotion.He sat there on purpose, Kakyoin thought.

"Okay. I have been awake since you opened the door of my room, and I followed you when you went out. I haven't fallen behind once in the past few nights. Can you explain now why you ran at this time Come out, isn't it more convenient when I don't go to work during the day."

"You are wrong, Kakyoin." His voice was very soft. "I'm not looking for convenience, let alone trying to do something while you're not around, just—I can't sleep. Sleep is meaningless to me now."

"I know."

"Then go back to sleep."

"Do you remember when I was in the hospital, I didn't want to take medicine?" Huajingyuan ignored him and said to himself.

"Why mention this?" Jotaro frowned.

"You are the same as me back then, Jotaro, do you still remember how you did it?" Before Jotaro could speak, Kakyoin continued. "I guess you acted impulsively. But I am different, otherwise I would have dragged you home on the first day, but sitting here I suddenly understand that for a stubborn person, it may be the right thing to do .I should pull you back, take you to a psychiatrist, put you in therapy, and slowly get better. Hiding here won’t fix anything, neither you nor me.”

But Jotaro was harder to shake than he imagined, like a mountain.Compared with his own traumatic re-experience, he tends to adopt an avoidant attitude.Kakyoin finally touched the thorn, and it hurts to pull it out.This must not be an instant process, Jotaro reached out and pressed his hand almost immediately, he understood, but it had to go on like this.

"Let me guess what dream you had." Kakyoin stopped looking at him and changed his tone. "The person who hurt you will appear repeatedly. You can't stop seeing the second before he walks over, and then there is a pain in the right side of his face. Kujo Jotaro was seriously injured, but his consciousness has not faded. The dream after that is bumpy, the sea It’s more fierce than ever, the seawater engulfs you and throws you into whirlpools. Lack of water, lack of oxygen, wound infection, these are magnified how many times, you wake up with a bitter taste in your mouth, and you don’t want to sleep again.” Kakyoin suddenly grabbed his arm and rolled up the sleeve, revealing the tiny scratch marks in his sight.

"How much did you guess right?"

Jotaro withdrew his hand.He was sweating profusely, his expression could no longer be taut, and the muscles on his face drooped, as if he had aged a lot.Kakyoin put it away as soon as he was done, and sat quietly beside him for the time being, waiting for him to finish his cold sweat.

"I missed a little. I dreamed that I lost Xu Lun." He fell on the grassy slope behind him and closed his eyes.Kakyoin extended her hand and took his.

"She turned into a butterfly and flew away, no one could catch her."

"It's okay, Jotaro, it's okay." As if coaxing a child, he said while shaking his hands. "You all survived well, and you will live well in the future. Survival is better than everything, isn't it?"

"Ah."

"Let's go back."

"Yeah." He didn't move.

Jotaro fell asleep, as if he had experienced a serious illness, and fell into a deep sleep.Kakyoin took off her clothes and put them on him, took out a lighter and a cigarette, and lit one.He seldom smokes in front of Jotaro, for fear of causing his addiction, right now he urgently needs one to relieve his spirit, those words just now consumed a lot of energy.

It's funny to say.A few years after Jotaro quit smoking, Kakyoin started smoking.The reason is unclear, probably because the last girlfriend also smoked - she often wore a black bra, on the balcony, holding a thin lady's cigarette between her fingers, took a puff, and pulled over the bent Kakyoin, exchanging A minty kiss.She has dark green eyes, long black curly hair, and likes to wear a suit with extremely high heels.

I don't know why I thought of her.

Looking at his friend's sleeping face, Kakyoin slowly exhaled into the distance.Three hours later, the first rays of sunlight hit their faces.