Pilot

"to the future me"

Hello Shi Ye.

Your future self may frown upon reading this letter, and I know it.This letter is for Xie Hong's homework, but what I write is for the future, assuming you can really see it in the future, otherwise I won't spend an afternoon writing this damn thing.

Shi Ye, do you believe it?The world is made of chance and mistakes.

By mistake, I was born.By accident, I started playing guitar.Because of a mistake, I let Shen Zui have that ending.By chance, I met Midsummer.

I don't know how to describe him, and I don't know how to describe my life so far.These are all messed up in my head, but I feel that these are accidents and mistakes.Accidents and mistakes that I cannot escape.The things that make up a person - family, friendship, love, now it seems that I can only be... a little bit better in terms of love?It's funny.

But in fact, I still don't understand love.Not only love, but many other things, I don't understand, I can't figure it out.I don't understand why my father, who has never appeared again, obviously doesn't love me, but still pays me to send greeting cards every year.They obviously don’t want me, but before leaving Beijing this time, they even sent me a box of canned fruit, and put bank cards and letters in the box… Strange, isn’t it?He obviously doesn't want me, doesn't love me, and doesn't care about me, but he still wrote in the letter: I will always support you and be proud of you.

I don't understand Shi Junfeng, I don't understand Gao Li, I don't understand them, and I don't think they will ever understand me.They just say: We support you, you are our pride.

The future you, I hope the future you, have forgotten these insignificant pasts.

In the future... In the future, you will become a real adult. I am already thirty this year.I think when you read this letter, you are probably envious of me who is now 30 years old.But you in the future, I actually envy you... I really want to travel to the other end of time, into your body, and see how the future me is doing.Is our tour over yet?Is the millet spicy still there?Is Midsummer still by your side?

I don’t know if you in the future will think I’m naive, but the 30-year-old me seems to only care about these issues.

Have you accepted that you are getting old in the future?I think you may not accept it, you will still insist on exercising so that you have no fat, you will still care about whether you dress smartly today, and you will try to age slowly.I think even if you are 40 or 50 years old, you still have this kind of self-esteem, right?come on.

In the future, you should not be defeated, and you are still competing with the world, right?I think it should be.

Anyway, now that I am 30 years old, I have reconnected with my future. I believe that I will live a happier and more peaceful life. I believe that I will write phenomenal songs. I believe that I will grow a new personality during this journey. new self.Am I getting old? At the age of 30, I want to inspire you in the future. You will never grow old. As long as your hands are not broken, you can still press chords, and you can still play the guitar, your figure will be immortal in the eyes of others.

I don't really want to admit that I'm an adult, a mature person, it's exhausting.Will you still not want to grow up in the future?

I always encounter so many contradictions with the world.Those conflicts that I couldn't resolve became my wounds. I used various methods to cover up the festering wounds, covered them with clothes so that no one could see them, and used my voice to distract them from seeing me... I I thought I hid it well, until Sheng Xia lifted the black cloth covering the wound, he knelt down, and he kissed my wound.

I often don't understand what Shengxia is thinking, do you understand something in the future?

He always has a strange expression on his face.He smiles at the things I feel embarrassed about, he doesn't care about the things I don't want to face, he is always weird, but he is always cute... always gives me new inspiration, makes me believe in the future, makes me feel that there is nothing in life so bad.

When I hug him, I always feel that I am hugging the wind, and he seems to be floating away in a second, turning into smoke and disappearing.Is it because I worry about gains and losses?I don't think so, of course it's not my problem.Sometimes a person is too good to make people feel insecure. I often feel that he treats me like this... one day he will be tired, unable to bear it, and want to leave me.I've thought about it, I've thought about asking him if he will leave, when will he leave, and if he will feel annoying.

Of course it is impossible to really ask Sheng Xia.Then I want to ask you, the future you, has Midsummer ever left me?

If you are no longer with Shengxia in the future, then I am sorry for letting you see so many sad words.Tear up the letter and go get a drink.

If you're still with him, if he's still with you...then please do one thing.

Please go over and kiss him, and say to Sheng Xia:

I love you.