don't be alone anymore

*Gift*

……

After having a deep chat with Zhou Yuanen last time, Jian Muzi contacted Wen Guodong in time.

This weekend, Wen Guodong met Zhou Yuanen under the arrangement of Jian Muzi.

This detailed talk is also a sincere talk.

Entrusted by Jian Muzi to jointly solve Wen Yang's psychological problems, Zhou Yuanen was very responsible.

In the last chat with Wen Yang, she caught a clue, something that both Wen Guodong and Jian Muzi ignored...

Those things they might have imagined, but they just didn't expect to have such a profound impact on Wen Yang.

What Wen Yang cares about is not only sacrifice.

What Wen Yang cared about was not just sacrifice.

It wasn't just the sacrifice of his mother that made Wen Yang trapped in his identity as a policeman.

……

"Uncle Wen..."

The man who was nearly sixty years old talked about his daughter's events before she became an adult, but everything was vague.

Wen Guodong remembers very little about Wen Yang before he was 18 years old.

But after the age of 18, the familiarity and intimacy that he got along day and night, after all, he didn't know if he could make up for the absence of the previous years.

Jian Muzi handed the tissue in her hand to Wen Guodong, her eyes were also cloudy.

She can also be regarded as a child who grew up alone, so she can naturally understand how Wen Yang has come all the way.

But thinking about it carefully, she was luckier than Wen Yang.

At least, she has always had family members around her who love and protect her.

Whether it was the grandfather and grandmother back then, or the Xia family later.

She has family, she has parents, and they are always there for her.

Jian Muzi can imagine Wen Yang's loneliness and self-reliance, but it is difficult to imagine how Wen Yang lived in such an environment when he was a child and grew into what he is today.

Even though he is a child, he must be as sensible as an adult.

Stay at home alone, solve the problem of eating by yourself, and grow up alone as much as possible...

It is even harder for her to imagine that it took Wen Yang much determination to lose her mother at the age of 18 and change her dream.

Both Wen Guodong and she really thought that Wen Yang wanted to inherit Yang Changrong's behest.

Thinking about it now, Wen Yang might really be...

Too much love...

so lacking...

Although the father's love after adulthood cannot make up for the absence of the year, it still warms the sensible heart after all.

However, since his mother died at the age of 18, Wen Yang not only could not wait for the late maternal love, but also buried the regret of the lack of maternal love in the deepest part of his heart.

……

"Uncle Wen, Mu Zi, with all due respect...have you never realized that Wen Yang is a person with deep self-esteem?"

Wen Guodong and Jian Muzi were startled by this sentence at the same time...

Inferiority to the bone?

What means?

Zhou Yuanen sighed softly, people like Wen Yang were indeed the exception she had seen.

It is not difficult to imagine why such a seemingly outgoing, gentle and sunny person would deceive the two in front of him.

"Actually, have you ever thought about why Wen Yang became Wen Yang today?"

"I don't think it's because she is born sunny. She may be because she lacks something, so she tries to make others not lack what she lacks. If she lacks love, she will give love to others. If she lacks care, she will To give care to others. I lack sunshine and happiness, so I give others sunshine and happiness... She is not a saint, she just wants to get a little attention and response through her own efforts..."

"The care, tenderness, and sensitivity that people like in her may be because this person has gotten too little over the years."

"She was too sensible since she was a child, and she has a very special giving personality. She would not directly say that I also want care and love. When she herself longed for love and care, she knew that this should at least be exchanged. She even Those who want love and care are sensible... She may be thinking, will I give love and care first, and then I will always get it once. I will give it ten times, and there will always be one response to me."

……

"Uncle Wen, forgive me. I want to ask you, when Aunt Yang passed away, I mean when she died, did she leave any last words? "

Zhou Yuanen said quite sincerely that in addition to Wen Yang's parent-child relationship, she also had to understand the moment of a mother's sacrifice.

After learning about the profound impact of family and mother's sacrifice on Wen Yang, she must trace the root cause and uncover the scars that Wen's family did not want to mention.

Wen Guodong shrunk his fingers, at first he was shocked by Zhou Yuanen's words, but then he was full of regrets.

He shook his head and said sincerely,

"No...my wife...Chang Rong left very quickly...I didn't have time...I asked her colleagues who were by her side when she died...I couldn't leave anything..."

Zhou Yuanen sighed inwardly, she seemed to have a clear understanding of Wen Yang's situation.

This...may be Wen Yang's persistence...

"Muzi, Uncle Wen... have you ever thought that the reason why Wen Yang chose to be a policeman may be to get close to his mother... because of lack of love, lack of care from his parents, especially his mother, that's why he sacrificed to his mother She is always fully caring...the mother who never said a word, she was not sure at the last moment of her mother's life, whether she was cared about by her mother. I think, of course, this is just my personal guess...Yesterday I met Wen Yang again After chatting, Mu Zi was also there, and I think Mu Zi could see that the sacrifice had indeed affected Wen Yang. The sacrifice of her mother and colleagues had indeed greatly affected her mental state, but becoming a police officer And the reason why she is unwilling to give up being a policeman, I think, apart from the fact that she may really like this profession and the sacred mission behind this profession, I think it is more due to a child's desire for love and persistent..."

"In other words, I think it's because my aunt died and didn't leave a last word, so she can only rely on her closeness to her mother's occupation to understand her mother's mood when she died... She may have countless memories in her heart and mind. For the first time, I wondered if I was ever cared about..."

……

Zhou Yuanen's words shocked Wen Guodong and Jian Muzi again and again.

Wen Guodong, who knew the situation, and Jian Muzi, who knew part of the situation, seemed to have never explored clearly the reason why Wen Yang gave up his dream and turned to become a policeman.

Previously, they thought it was a child's way of commemorating their mother, and mistakenly thought that this was a child inheriting the mother's behest.

Because of some appearances and inertial thinking, they misjudged Wen Yang's real situation.

Children who have been forced to be sensible since they can remember, after all, long for love and care.

And for such a child, until the last moment of his mother's life, he could not be sure whether the other party cared about him.

The incompleteness of the small family and the absence of parents caused her self-confidence and low self-esteem since she was a child.

She was always the one who was given up, the one who was always skipped over...

Whenever Wen Guodong and Yang Changrong were involved in police affairs, her existence seemed so insignificant.

And those resentments that I wanted to confide but swallowed back because I was sensible...

Yang Changrong can sponsor so many children in orphanages, and can be the mother of so many children, but he can't go home to accompany her.

Those thank you notes that became relics...

Those unfamiliar faces in the funeral home...

They called her mother "Mom" one by one...

She didn't even know what kind of mood she should use to look at this great maternal love.

Sometimes, she would actually envy those orphans.

If she is also one of them, she will get more attention from Yang Changrong.

A child's essential desire for love and care has finally completed a career change close to that of his mother.

The dead are gone, and she has no other way to find the answers she wants to know.

She can only focus on her mother's career before her death, infinitely close to a career that she devoted herself to in her life, try to perceive a person as much as possible, and imagine a mother's possible mood as much as possible.

Behind his identity as a policeman, Wen Yang is still the child who most yearns for love and care in the world.

She doesn't want much and is still surprisingly sensible.

After so many years, she was just waiting for Yang Changrong to say "Mom loves you very much too".

After so many years, she will not be waiting for the day when Yang Changrong retires.

After Yang Changrong retires, she will have a chance to get her own share of maternal love.

However, she failed to wait for this opportunity, all she was waiting for was the word sacrifice.

It seems that fate and parents like Yang Changrong have neglected...

When a grown-up needs a child's countless concessions and compromises...

How many times has this child convinced himself, and how many scars have been left in this child's heart.

A sensible child is just a child.

In front of the mother, the child just wants to be a child.

Before the age of 18, just a child.

After 18, just kids.

……

That night, Jian Muzi drove Wen Yang home.

Wen's back home.

This time, when Wen Yang asked to stay for dinner again, Jian Muzi did not refuse.

She followed Wen Yang to the dining table, and ate a table full of meals made by Wen Guodong himself.

After coming out of Zhou Yuanen's office, Wen Guodong, with red eyes, made a special trip to the vegetable market.

The ones I bought were all Wen Yang's favorite dishes.

The child's father also remembers Jian Muzi, whom the child often talks about, and the white meat and vegetables that Jian Muzi loves to eat.

On the issue of Wen Yang, the man who is a father is willing to reach a united front with Jian Muzi.

Regardless of whether the daughter's relationship will be reaped in the future, whether it will blossom and bear fruit, at least today, when they enter Zhou Yuanen's office and leave Zhou Yuanen's office, these two people are all fellow travelers.

They have a common wish, hope that the same person is healthy and happy.

……

Police Officer Wen, who injured his left hand, usually likes to eat while holding a bowl.

At this moment, due to a hand injury, the speed of eating has been slowed down.

Holding the chopsticks in one hand, she chewed slowly, sensitively, she noticed that there was something different about the atmosphere tonight.

Wen Guodong and Jian Muzi also finished eating early.

Wen Guodong served Wen Yang a bowl of chicken soup, while Jian Muzi carefully peeled the shrimp for Wen Yang.

The behavior of the prawns being removed cleanly pleased the father at the table.

Wen Guodong suppressed the satisfaction in his heart, and turned his head to focus on his daughter.

"Yangyang, how about a bowl of chicken soup when you're full?"

"No dad."

Wen Yang finished eating the shrimp that Jian Muzi had peeled, and stopped Jian Muzi's next move.

"Jian Mumu, it's okay, I'm full."

She glanced at Jian Muzi, then at Wen Guodong, "You two...what kind of medicine are you selling in the gourd today?"

Hearing this, Jian Muzi took Wen Yang back to the sofa in the living room, holding Wen Yang's hand tightly and loosen again.

She's not sure, next...

How would Wen Yang react after seeing something like that.

But nothing can be broken, she hopes that she can accompany Wen Yang to make it through.

Usher in some light, usher in some inner openness.

……

Since the death of Yang Changrong, the father and daughter have guarded this old community and never left.

Since the death of Yang Changrong, there is an extra safe in this aging home.

Before, Wen Yang always thought that the safe contained Wen Guodong's private money, or treasures such as real estate certificates.

Today, she heard the sound of the safe being opened.

"My dad is..."

Wen Yang is still a little confused...

Even if my dad wants to show his valuables to others, Jian Mumu shouldn't have this expression...

Those who clearly knew what Wen Guodong was doing were full of expressions of worry and distress for others.

"Jian Mumu, what's wrong with you?"

Jian Muzi closed her eyes and paused her words, "Wait... Uncle Wen... wait for him to tell you..."

……

Wen Guodong came over with an iron box in his arms, and opened the box in front of Wen Yang and Jian Muzi.

A slightly faded police uniform, a police jacket with three holes...

Wen Yang immediately waved away the police uniform that Wen Guodong held up and showed in front of his eyes, "Dad! What are you doing!"

She clenched her right hand, which was not held by Jian Muzi, and her injured left hand was almost clenched very tightly.

Good thing...

Fortunately, Jian Muzi predicted this...

Fortunately, she stabilized the remaining fingers of her left hand, and did not let the emotional person hurt her recovering left hand again.

"Wen Yang..."

Jian Muzi immediately embraced Wen Yang, half-embracing him, "Calm down first..."

She was so distressed that she couldn't add it...

Because Wen Yang's reaction just confirmed Zhou Yuanen's guess...

"...There is one thing...you have never seen it...Uncle Wen was afraid that you would think too much, so he didn't show it to you..."

Wen Yang's canthus was about to burst, his eyes were red, and tears were already falling from the corners of his eyes.

"What, what, east, west? What are you afraid of me thinking too much?"

The words that popped out from gritted teeth almost made the upper body of the person tremble...

……

The police uniform worn by Yang Changrong when he died...

In the pocket of his jacket was a train ticket with many words faded.

On the corner of the train ticket, there is a red mark that shows a little age...

Over the years, the blood has faded a lot...

Ning City - North City

Yang Changrong left the car at 13:13 on the afternoon of the day after his death.

……

"Your mother's train ticket... I bought it a few days before I left... I was on a business trip in Nancheng, you know... Grandpa and grandma went to Hong Kong for a trip, you also know... Yangyang, she wants to come back and see your……"

Wen Guodong handed the ticket to Wen Yang, but Wen Yang stared at the ticket tightly and didn't accept it.

Jian Muzi took it for her and put it in her hand.

"When your mother died...the last hand touched my uniform pocket...so this ticket is stained..."

……

Wen Yang ignored it, she looked at the train ticket in her hand, and more tears fell straight down.

She didn't know what she was crying for...

only……

She got up and rushed into her bedroom, hiding in the balcony.

The little guys on the balcony were picked up by their real owner, Yang Yulong, because Wen Yang was not at home, but the temporary owner, Wen Yang, hid in the place where the little guys used to stay at this moment.

She curled up and hugged her legs tightly...

The face is buried deep between the arms...

There was a choking sound, followed by a bitter cry, like a child who lost something he loved.

……

Mama Yang was given to the sponsored orphans for evaluation.

The role model of the times is left to the country for evaluation.

First-class hero models and personal first-class merit are handed over to the public security system for evaluation.

The best public security chief in Ning City is evaluated by the people of Ning City.

However, a good mother can only be evaluated by Wen Yang.

You see, sensible children are so sensible...

She only wanted Yang Changrong to think of her at the last moment.

As long as Yang Changrong still remembers her in the end, she is her good mother.

……

Jian Muzi searched for the sound of crying and found Wen Yang in the corner of the balcony.

She held Wen Yang's left hand, still cautiously in tears.

She knelt on the ground and hugged Wen Yang extremely tightly.

……

Years later……

A child who lacks love and care and has low self-esteem to the bone...

Finally got the mercy of God.

Become a gift from others, but also have your own gift.

……

The author has something to say:

Involves sacrifice (not just sacrifice at the level of human annihilation)

I don't like to talk about heroism, greatness, fearlessness, responsibility, great love, fraternity, dedication, giving up for everyone, being responsible...

These are people talking about.

I want to talk about the helplessness of sacrifice, the impact of sacrifice, after sacrifice...

Today, I have finally told you completely how Wen Yang became the Wen Yang he is today.