[Batman] I, The Joker, how is that possible?

Chapter 69: Life is an ending, and life never ends

"Yesterday afternoon, a reporter from a news agency was robbed as soon as he took a photo of my rumored boyfriend." On the bustling pier, Bruce approached Yunhai from behind who had already finished get off work and was about to buy some food before going home.

"It's so pitiful." Yun Hai commented without raising her head, she was looking down at every crab crawling around in the basin, evaluating their cooked texture from the outside.

"Have you nothing to say?"

At this moment, Yunhai looked at the persistent Bruce, and she blinked her eyes and said, "Oh, don't wrong innocent people, I didn't do anything." Oh, as for who is behind it, that's another matter~

Apparently Bruce is also aware of this, and he said helplessly at this moment: "Your career in consulting criminals is booming, but there is a problem with the remuneration."

"Interesting comment." Yun Hai snorted and turned his attention to the crab again.

"Can you disclose the information of the guests?"

"Sorry, business secret." This old crab looks very fat, hiss—this one seems to be good too?Look at these small crab legs, they are chubby and delicious.

"Two crabs." After finalizing the lucky cutie to take back, Yunhai raised his head and said to the vendor.

"Four" but Bruce on one side corrected that number.

After hearing this, Yunhai's first reaction was: "Four? How can I eat four by myself?" Just kidding!Is the gout package just a joke?

"You didn't buy it for me?" In the end, Bruce was even more surprised than Yunhai. He turned his head and complained to his partner with great internal injuries.

Regarding this point, Yunhai had something to say, but she replied with vain eyes, "You never told me that you like crabs." Listen, how stubborn and decent!

So Bruce stared blankly at the unyielding Yunhai for a while, and ruthlessly raised five fingers to the peddler who was looking at him curiously: "Five crabs, thank you."

Before it was over, he pointed to the people around him and said to the vendor, "Also, she pays."

Dead fish eyes in the sea of ​​clouds: No, baby Bruce, shouldn't you show off your president demeanor at this time?Is it really okay to blackmail your employees like this?

"Ah? Oh." The old woman watching on the side seemed to wake up from a dream, and a little hurriedly packed the crabs that were still crawling around with their teeth and claws into a thick bag.When she lifted it up and handed it to Yunhai, she also gave her an old version of her sweet smile.

No, this smile can't appease Yunhai, she is staring at the bag with an indescribable expression for a long time without reaching out.Am I going to stop eating this meal?

"Go back and give you a raise." Bruce, who seemed to have finally realized that he was exploiting employees, coughed awkwardly and took the bag to try to save his image.

"No, I was thinking about a question." Touching his chin, Yun Hai fell into deep thought.

"what?"

"How about I cook a crab meal for you?"

"You actually know how to cook?"

"Why do you have so many personnel affairs? I'll cook you a meal. In exchange, should you agree to my request?"

Yunhai interrupted the question impatiently, and the familiar conversation made Bruce couldn't help but a smug smile appeared on the corner of his mouth.He tried to hide them so they wouldn't show up.

"any request?"

"Take a tour of my temporary residence."

Well, this time the smile really cannot be concealed!

"What are you laughing at, you'll still have the strength to laugh if you have the ability!" Seeing this, Yun Hai gritted his back molars angrily!She really wanted to snatch the plastic bag and paste the crab inside to Bruce's smiling face!

Forget it, she endured it for the sake of beauty!

One month later in the morning, Bruce, who had finished his night patrol early and fell asleep, got up from the bed in the bedroom, and Afford opened the curtains to let in a ray of autumn sunshine.

"Good morning, master, another sunny day."

"Morning, Alfred." Bruce mumbled and lowered his arm covering his eyes, and then his eyes caught a strange sight outside the window.

Turning over and getting out of bed, stepping on the carpet and walking to the window, Bruce put his hands on the window and looked at it, then turned back and asked the housekeeper who was already making the bed: "Aren't the land next to the ancestral house belong to me?" Why is the next door? There will be a sudden boom in construction!

"Oh, you sold the land last night." Unfolding the newly changed sheets, Ah Fu calmly answered the master's question.

"How is that possible, I—" Bruce stopped mid-sentence, and then he was depressed.

Patting Master Wayne on the shoulder, Ah Fu gave advice from someone who has been there: "Forgive me, Master, even if you are doing intimate things, you should be more cautious." Everything was said without saying anything.

Bruce blushed slightly.In order to hide the heat on his face, he leaned against the window and turned his head to look out. At this moment, he saw the sea of ​​clouds jumping off the newly erected steel structure.

The other party waved at him, and Bruce turned his head awkwardly.When he looked back after a second, the figure disappeared without a trace, except for a few construction workers who were left behind.

"Bruce, come take a look at my new school uniform!" Half an hour later Dick rushed into the living room excitedly, only to find the old butler there alone.

"Is going to work really that fun? Why is Bruce running the company so actively every day?" Reluctantly sitting on the dining table, Dick angrily picked up a piece of steak with a fork.

"Probably to meet someone, Master Dick." Ah Fu on the side said implicitly.

"Understood, I'm going to see Uncle Yun, right?" Dick understood in seconds, he ate the food in one bite and complained: "But Uncle Yun can't come to us often, I miss him too, okay?" ? How could Padre be so selfish?"

"Master, maybe you can invite him in person." A Fu gave a suggestion with a smile.

"Oh! Ah Fu, you are really amazing!" After giving the old housekeeper an oily hug, Dick jumped off the stool with sparkling eyes: "I'm going to invite Uncle Yun!"

Behind him, Ah Fu, who stirred up the water even more, showed a smile that hides his merit and fame.It’s easy to miss things like falling in love if you don’t take the initiative because you’re shy, so Master Wayne, let Dick and I be your solid backing~~~

Well, there is absolutely no meaning of spectating in this.

The author has something to say: God assists

☆, extra episode 1

Extra 1

"Do not move."

"You have a nice back, you know that, Brucie, or should I call you—Bats?"

Batman tensed the muscles in his back from the dark voice, a voice he'd never forget: "How did you—"

"Know your identity?" The owner of the voice, that is, Joker, added the second half of the sentence for Batman.

"The way you chase after your little girlfriend like a pug is giving away too much Batbaby, but after tonight I'm afraid you'll just have to say goodbye to your dear girlfriend."

The Joker chuckled a few times and pressed the blade side on Batman's back when Batman tried to resist: "Wow, wow, wow, don't move around, I don't want to add a little bit to your beautiful back. Unnecessary lines, or being forced to shoot at a few people in the villa, I remember an old guy who seems to be called Alpha."

Alfred? !This terrible possibility made "Bruce" completely give up struggling, and he looked through the darkness to the door, but it was too dark to see anything.

"Yes, yes, yes, that's it." "Bruce"'s face changed so much that the clown couldn't control his excitement, "Let me think about what I'm going to do next?"

"How am I going to let everyone know that you're mine, Batsy? Especially with those nasty guys trying to get your attention every day."

The clown's short silence made "Bruce" have a bad idea, the armor is just three meters away, maybe he can try it—no, Joker has already discovered Alfred, and he must not take the risk—

"Ah, I thought of a good idea, how about engraving a few words on your back?"

The bad thoughts of the clown were projected into the brain of "Bruce", which made him tense all the muscles in his body, and the two shoulder blades were as stiff as two planks.

"Just engrave—Joker's belongings—"

The light began to dim, and the sense of hearing was blurred at the same time.The painful feeling of the knife tip slowly piercing into the flesh and blood was like a long delay, but what was worse was that "Bruce" knew that this was just an appetizer.

"Bruce" has made sufficient preparations to deal with this night that seems to be frozen in time, and it is at this time that a third person suddenly appears out of thin air? !

The sound of metal appeared together with the two dazzling cold lights. To be honest, the sound that burst out after the hand-to-hand combat is really pleasant to someone's ears.

"Oh, that's why human instincts are really annoying. I just accidentally missed every bit of murderous intent and was noticed." Accompanied by a careless voice, a person took a step forward from the darkness and finally completely Thoroughly bathed in the moonlight field.

The slightly long curly hair was scattered on the shoulders, and a few strands of hair on the high forehead obscured the too sharp vision.The pale and protruding cheekbones combined with the deep eye color look like the opposite person, but the hair color and demeanor of the two people are completely opposite.

Who else could this third person be besides Yun Hai?One second, she just turned on the lights and perfected a planning book, and the next second she was wearing plaid pajamas and changed places inexplicably.

So what's going on here? "Joker" spying on "Bruce" at night?The two even leaned on the bed and started to face each other frankly?Maybe I should be under the car instead of on it.

Why can such bloody time travel scripts happen to her?I'm just a baby!The tired Yunhai raised his right hand and stroked his hair behind his head, then raised his head: "I'm sorry to disturb your good business."

The first sentence of apology perfectly maintained his image as a good baby, but the last sentence went straight to the goal: "But I have to say, you really stepped on my bottom line perfectly." The other side of this world one me.

Yunhai raised his head, showing a whole mouthful of sharp teeth that reflected the white light under the moonlight to the "clown".

"Okay, "Bruce", I don't expect you to trust me now, but I'm sorry I have other things to deal with." Although it is not the same person, Yunhai still continues the title of his own world.Unprepared, she turned her back to "Bruce" and moved her neck left and right, but her eyes were fixed on the other Joker amidst the piercing rattle.

The person who attacks first is likely to show his flaws due to inertia, but what if your fighting skills are far superior to the opponent?Yun Hai tilted her head and showed a smile, then rushed out without warning, she answered the question with her actions:

The winner is of course her, Yunhai!

Like lightning, Yun Hai laughed wildly and rushed towards the other Joker, the cold light evoked by the dagger in his hand seemed to carry a series of deadly arcs.Within one second, she launched three attacks from three directions, fiercely attacking, and then violently retreating, without any fancy showmanship, without any extra movement.

If the block is blocked, change to another place, and if you retreat, you will catch up.The opponent may be able to block one or two of them, but what if you are facing a squall?Why not just enjoy the rain of swords and lightsabers!

The metal light poured down like rushing rain. It was a completely different way of fighting from the usual fight with Batman, more like going crazy than playing.But this is actually a wrong judgment: Those attacks seem to be disorderly, but every step is so rational that it is shocking.

The sharp fighting instinct dominates Yunhai, making her eyes as cold as the cold of ninety-nine.

Someone's arm was broken, maybe Unkai's, or another Joker's, but she couldn't feel it at all because of the adrenaline rush.Before the crisp sound of bone breaking subsided, Yun Hai twisted the clown's intact arm with one hand and put it behind his back in a grabbing manner, while wrapping the other hand firmly around the clown's neck.

The battle ended here, and it ended as surprisingly quickly as it began, and in just a few minutes, the situation had completely changed.Yun Hai looked down at the "Joker" who was half-closed and gasping for breath, and commented with an inquiring spirit: "What do you think will happen if I kill the Joker of this world?"

Forget it, what if I get off the hook?With such thoughts, Yunhai directly knocked out the "Joker" who was trying to speak.

Come on, shut up and you, it's strange for a dog to spit out ivory.

When "Joker" woke up again, he found himself sitting on the bar counter with this stranger who suddenly appeared, oh, to be more precise, Joker was sitting on the bar counter with a bruised nose and handcuffed handcuffs, and the stranger was sitting on the bar counter with He sat side by side enjoying his own pudding for dessert.

"Want to have a bite?" Yun Hai raised his eyelids and looked at "Joker" who just opened his eyes, but of course he didn't get an answer.

"Oh." Shrugging his shoulders indifferently, Yunhai took back the spoon he handed out without even giving the other party 0.1 second to dig pudding.No answer is better, because - "Actually, even if you want to eat, I won't give it to you." That's right, it's so straightforward!It's Yunhai himself, she is right, she can be said to be quite displeased with this "Joker" now!

"Who are you?" "Joker" stared at the sea of ​​clouds and quickly wiped out the pudding and asked.

"The Sea of ​​Clouds." The spoon drew a circle in the air, and the Sea of ​​Clouds casually answered the previous question while staring at the pudding in the cup to decide whether to eat the strawberries on it first: "It means the sea of ​​clouds."

Happily decided to save the delicious food for the last~ She bit down on the spoon and narrowed her eyes happily.So the rumor that Ah Fu in every world is good at making desserts is true!

"Are you mocking me?"

"Interesting comment." Yun Hai couldn't see where he was laughing at the other party.

"I'm asking about your identity."

Hearing this, Yunhai raised his eyes and looked at "Joker" like alms: "Then what is your identity to ask me?"

Without waiting for the other party to answer, she frivolously pointed at Joker with a spoon and said the word mercilessly: "Are you defeated?" A cruel smile bloomed on the corner of Yunhai's lips following the words.

"You're an interesting person."

"Thank you for the compliment, I also think I am very interesting."

"Then do you know who you kidnapped?"

It seems that if we go around in circles like this, the conversation will be endless!Yunhai swallowed the strawberry in one gulp, let out a mournful sigh, and threw the spoon back into the silver plate. After finishing these actions, she volleyed towards the air behind her and at the same time leaned her body at 45 degrees and turned her head to look at "Joker": "Ah , Of course I know who you are."

And Yunhai may be the person who knows this best in the world, and of course she doesn't want to admit this fact.

"It's just that Joker."

"Aha, you know Joker but you don't know what the name Joker represents?" Yun Hai's fearlessness immediately attracted the attention of the person opposite.

I knew that "Joker" would react like this——Yunhai said the second half of the sentence weakly against the dead fish eyes: "Damn it, of course I know what this famous head represents, because——

"Because I am Joker!" Oh!What a painful self-knowledge!I really want to kill myself in another world!

"Huh? Bruce, you came out so soon."

Without giving "Joker" time to react, Yun Hai happily stood up and waved to the Batman who suddenly appeared by the door: "Although this suit is also very good, I still like you wearing that black helmet— —”

The second half is gone, because she was brought down, well, even worse, with "Joker".

Is this the fire at the city gate and the fish in the pond?Why does she want to take the blame for another Joker?Yun Hai opened his eyes depressed and found that he was facing the familiar ceiling of the Bat Cave Prison.

Is there anything worse than this?

"See, no matter how you defend Bats, you are treated the same as me hahahaha!" Joker, who was tied to the chair, sneered mercilessly.

Oh, I take back my foreword, it turned out that it could have been even worse.

"I call it giving him a sense of security." Rubbing her sore neck, Yun Hai complained in disgust and got up from the ground. She raised her hand and was not surprised to see that she also had two exquisite iron chains on her hands.

It's pretty, but a little heavy.Darling, are you in love?The one that lives in a prison, the one that comes with two exquisite bracelets, the one that misses this village and there is no such store.

But to be honest, there is still a difference in the treatment of the same prisoner. At least Batsy didn't wrap her into dumplings like the one next door, right?It seems that even "Bruce" from another world prefers her~

This thought made Yunhai's mood improve at a speed visible to the naked eye. She gloated and said to Joker, who was also a prisoner: "So that's why I can be the partner of Baby Bruce and you, and you can only Be a trash rape rapist."

I'm sorry, dear, the reality is so cruel, dear.Yunhai gave the "Joker" a Joker's standard shark smile, with a mocking ability of "MAX++++"

The author has something to say: I was frightened by several clown articles, no, I can’t suffer alone, you will suffer too!

Weekly task: oppress your readers, 1/1 completed √

☆, extra episode 2

Extra 2

"Remember what I said, Bats?" The sound of the door opening made the two Jokers look up at the same time, and the Joker of this world rushed in first, and Batman said: "Don't forget your housekeeper and little girlfriend."

After "Joker" finished threatening, Yunhai, who had been pretending not to exist, suddenly looked sideways at him.

Before Batman could react, she made a sudden shot, and the iron chain she brought made an extremely fierce piercing sound with the movement, and then the sound was covered by a loud and scary dull sound.

That's right, at that moment, Yunhai shot Joker's face expressionlessly and firmly pressed Joker's face into the table, and the steel tabletop made a terrifying noise when it came into contact with the face.

It stands to reason that it should be very cool after doing this, but Yunhai, she is really depressed!When she saw this "Joker", she saw herself, and she couldn't help but ask herself: From the perspective of a third party, was the previous self really so bad to Bruce?really?Ahhhhhh, what a shame!

Depressedly, he put his face against the cold metal tabletop Yunhai and used actions to show what it means to be truly autistic.She's had enough of this kind of plot of facing her dark history, and now she just wants to leave this world immediately, immediately!

As if feeling that this scene was not embarrassing enough, "Joker" continued: "I like you a little bit."

"Huh?" With a single tone, Yunhai turned his head in disgust: "That's too bad, I don't like you at all."

It is normal to be frightened in the face of a pervert, but the question is, if this pervert is another self, can he really be frightened?So, this is the current state of Yunhai. Joker, who is looking at the world with despair and shame, is in a strange state of excitement because of her words and actions.

Yun Hai's eyes died, and she spit out: "Really false, I can be excited when I was beaten? I am really abnormal in this world." And it's still a shaking M, but saying that I really say that she is true in this way okay?

"It's so interesting to see me in another world pretending to be a normal person when I'm obviously a psychopath." "Joker"'s rebuttal is also on the point, but——

"Psychopath? I'm not, I have empathy." Facing the accusation of "self", Yunhai showed a fake smile that couldn't be faker.

When she saw the expression of "Bruce" getting weirder and weirder from the corner of her eyes, Yun Hai realized that her words were becoming more and more suspicious. She opened her mouth and tried to disentangle the relationship: "Bruce is not what you think, sophistry." Master listen to my explanation, ah, no, listen to my sophistry."

It's over, the mouth is already bald.Yun Hai was angry: "Tsk, it's so annoying, anyway, it's not the case at all! Brucie, you—"

Facing the man-eating eyes of the big Batman, Yun Hai immediately changed his words: "Bruce, I apply to be separated from the next door. Believe me, it is definitely a bad idea to lock us together."

In the protest of "Joker", she tried to influence the unmoved Batman with her big sincere eyes, and then she succeeded?real or fake?

Maybe it was because the big bat didn't want her to disturb them both.Listening to the symphony from next door, Yunhai gloated: Wow, that sounds so painful.

It would be better if the beating didn't come upon him.When she heard the door of her private room was opened, Yun Hai's gloating immediately disappeared without a trace. Thinking of the "beating of love" she was about to encounter, she raised her hand and covered her nose without thinking, and said in a low voice, "Don't Hit the nose, and Ah Fu broke the bridge of his nose when he stole lobster last week."

"Hey, what kind of eyes are you looking at?" Halfway through speaking, Yun Hai became furious: "You encouraged me to do this!" Why is the culprit still pretending to be innocent now?

"You should know, I'm not the same Bruce you're talking about." Batman reminded in a low voice, even though his identity had been exposed, he still wore the helmet to cover the upper half of his face.

"Oh, I can tell." Seeing that the crisis was over, Yun Hai put down his right hand covering his mouth and nose and waved lazily: "I didn't confuse you two."

Immediately afterwards, she complained about Bruce mercilessly: "You are completely different from my violent Batsy who has persecution paranoia. Like him, it is impossible to leave his manor unprotected."

"Ah, and Alfred." Thinking of that Iron Fist, Yun Hai immediately grinned: "It's too risky to use Alfred to threaten Batman, it's so hard to think about it!"

Anyway, Yunhai would never do this!That must be boring, right?

"I see." In just a few words, the Batman of this world made his decision.Under Yunhai's curious eyes, he fixed his hands on both sides of the mask and took it off with one force.

At that moment, the sea of ​​clouds was astonished: the short black hair hung down in a mess, "Bruce" raised his head and shook them away, and a pair of crystal-clear ice-blue eyes looked over with a cold light. .

Hey, when we go back, we will take Batsy for a ride on a motorcycle.This idea jumped into Yunhai's brain in a flash.

"Let's start researching from the place where you first appeared."

Yun Hai habitually waited for "Bruce" to lead the way, only to find that the latter was still looking at him with a straight face.She is witty and understands the truth in seconds, but it is better not to know.

Sighing tiredly, Yunhai ruffled her curly hair: "Understood, I understand, I'll go first and you can monitor me from behind." It's one thing to understand, but another to feel comfortable Now, even though she knew that this was not Bruce from her own world, she still couldn't help but feel internally hurt seeing the other party's vigilance.

"But you did the right thing." Like in his own home, Yun Hai opened the mechanism of the Bat Cave and turned to the corridor to the master bedroom: "With my personality, I might not be able to deal with the next world. You are the sworn enemy."

So, compared to being on guard without pain or itching, if my dear one gets hurt because of being careless, the loss outweighs the gain.No matter which world Yunhai is in, he doesn't want to see such a thing happen.

She put her hands on the door of the master bedroom and smiled back at Batman while speaking of words that disliked herself.

The way to go back was much simpler than what Yunhai had expected at the beginning, but in the end it was discovered that it was actually caused by the residual power of the system.With a small box in his arms, he was kicked back to the original world by the world consciousness. After the sea of ​​clouds tossed and turned, he couldn't sleep no matter what.

The more she thought about it, the angrier she became, and the angrier she became, the more she thought about it, she couldn't sleep no matter what, she was so angry that she was thrown into bed!

"?!" The siren blared loudly, and Bruce woke up suddenly from his dream, and the first thing he did was to shake off Yunhai's arm like an electric shock.He was just about to give the other party a neck bone surgery called backhand triangle strangulation just now in his sleep!

"Can you make a noise next time? I almost broke your bone!" There was a muffled bang, which was the sound of Bruce lying straight back on the bed.

"Huh?" Yun Hai said disdainfully, she swung her arms and rolled her eyes: "I've already stabbed you in the chest several times before that."

"Alas—" Bruce lay back with his arms covering his face, and the drowsiness came again after the alert was lifted. He mumbled a little confusedly: "What's the reason you came here in the middle of the night?"

"Check security at Wayne Manor and Batman's vigilance."

"How is the result?"

"Let me tell you, I am very dissatisfied."

Yun Hai's blunt statement received Bruce's indifferent monotone response: "Oh." Then he asked blankly: "Then can I continue to sleep? The bad idea you gave Penguin cost me two nights Didn't sleep well."

Ignoring the accusation in those words, Yun Hai replied triumphantly: "Damn! I knew he did a good job."

"I'm going to sleep, you can do what you want." As Bruce said, he lay straight on the bed with his arms around the upper body of another person and closed his eyes. Yunhai could feel that the speed of his chest rising and falling was gradually slowing down. .

It's too coquettish to say sleep and sleep.Yunhai silently tried to lift Bruce's arm, once, twice, three times - after the third failed attempt to leave, she couldn't bear to shake him awake: "Damn it, can you let go of your hand? Didn't you agree to let him go?" Am I free?"

"I'm sleepy."

"And then?" Yun Hai's eyebrows fluttered, and she broke Bruce's arm in great dissatisfaction.Who sleeps with the muscles in their arms?Look at your bulging old tall biceps, you liar!

"Good night."

"If you don't let go of your hand, tomorrow there will be an extra body of the master of Wayne Manor on the master bed, and then Ah Fu will scream and run to confront me." Yun Hai issued an ultimatum.

With a sigh, Bruce continued to lie on his back with his eyes closed and corrected, "Alfred won't scream."

"Very well, then he'll take his double revolver and his old-fashioned longsword and bring a tap-dancing Dick over the roof I just built."

There is really nothing to do with her.Bruce reluctantly opened one eye to look at the sea of ​​clouds, and reluctantly relaxed the muscles in his arms to loosely embrace the latter's waist: "I let go and you keep quiet until early morning, deal?"

"Deal"

"Then, good night."

"It's already four o'clock. Good morning."

"keep quiet."

"Come on."

Yunhai originally planned to leave directly, but the moonlight tonight is really beautiful.

Lowering her head, she could see the hazy moonlight drifting in silently through the carved window lattice, and under the clear moonlight, everything was as beautiful as a dream.Yunhai's gaze followed the blurred light and shadow all the way and finally landed on Bruce's defenseless sleeping face.

He really fell asleep, his chest rising and falling with soft and slow breathing, this scene is so unbelievable, but this person is so real.Right in front of your eyes, within reach.

'Joker's possessions' is such a selfish and stupid idea.What Joker from another world was planning to do broke into Yunhai's heart, making her show a very mocking smile.

Beautiful birds are most beautiful when they are flying in the sky.She said with emotion when Yunhai lay down on Bruce's side holding the dagger.

The pillow sank with the movement of the second person, and the black straight hair and curly hair were spread out and intertwined, making it hard to distinguish.

In the mottled light and shadow cast from the window, the real and the unreal are mixed into an indistinct mess.If you can't tell whether it's real or unreal, just take it as real.After several rounds of ups and downs in waking and lethargic sleep, Yunhai's consciousness was quickly lost between the real and the unreal.

The autumn night was still a bit cold, and she kicked the cold knife on the carpet in the middle of her sleep.

The author has something to say: I won't admit that the old couple model is amazing!