Absolutely retarded option

Today, the two Westward Journey parties are mocking each other on the forum.

The point of contention is mainly "Bah! The "Journey to the West" unearthed from Wu Cheng'en's tomb must be a Xibei product! Why does Huaguoshan have a second master who went to the Heavenly Court with the Great Sage? Or is it a female monkey demon? She is beautiful after transforming Chang'e is still the think tank next to the Great Sage, the Great Sage didn't go to get the Western Scriptures but went to a broken ancient secret realm to make a time difference, there are 100 years in the heaven, after becoming a saint, he rebelled and beat the shit out of the Buddha. Break through the catastrophe of heaven and earth and become the new demon emperor? What is the battle between the dragon, phoenix and unicorn clans for hegemony and the lich... I will never admit that this is better written than the original "Journey to the West"!"

Today, readers of the orthodox Journey to the West and the prehistoric version of Journey to the West have played out their brains again.

"I dare to bet my life that the second master Cliff is a time traveler, you can see what his name is——Sun Wufan! It must be after Sun Wukong!"

"It's still a female monkey tsk tsk."

"What's the matter upstairs that you can't look down on the female monkey? What's wrong with you?"

"Is there only one person who thinks that the Great Sage Fleeing Heaven is interesting enough?"

"You are not alone hahahahahaha."

At this moment, Dongsheng Shenzhou, Donghai Aolai Country, Huaguo Mountain, Water Curtain Cave, the great sage Sun Wufan, who is also my father, I am calling the children - grinding beans.

Our Huaguo Mountain must also keep pace with the times, first of all, we must improve in all aspects of basic necessities of life.

Not to mention the quality of the food!

Due to my coercion, the monkeys had to dig into the mountains. The soybeans are wild, so I don’t know how they taste.

A little bottomless.

"Second King! The beans are ready to be ground!"

A little monkey said flatteringly.

Don't tell me that monkeys don't flatter our Huaguo Mountain Monkey Jie Shanling, but I have personally seen reports of male monkeys trading fruit for female monkeys and their sex.

Don't overestimate yourself and don't underestimate your relatives.

I walked over in distaste. The bucket of soy milk was dug out of stone. This is called a stone pot. It is said that the dishes made out of it are more delicious. "You monkeys are ashamed to say that you are monkeys. The drink is still stored in the Shuilian Cave."

Who lived in the Water Curtain Cave in the past, I am afraid it was the cave of a certain monk, otherwise there is no way to explain it.

The monkey monkey grandson was ashamed and ashamed.

I squeezed the Fajue, lit firewood, and boiled soybean milk.

After an hour, the tofu was formed.

Not bad, good taste.

"It's better to call it Huaguoshan Tofu!"

"Bah! It should be called Erdawang Tofu!"

"Yes! Er Dawang Tofu!"

This year's monkeys are good and have a bright future.

Everyone had a delicious meal of Erdawang Tofu. Recently, I am addicted to the Absolute Option reading version of Gengtian Wen. Our Huaguo Mountain lacks everything but land.

When the monkeys and grandchildren heard that I was going to open up wasteland and cultivate land in Huaguo Mountain, they couldn't believe it: "My lord, we monkeys don't need to farm land, that's what humans do, and besides, there are no fruits on the mountain!"

At this time, the king came back, "Gohan wants to plant the land, so let's plant it."

"Your Majesty said you want to farm! Go and farm!!"

Me: "..." The sorrow of the second in command!

The sun was just right at noon, and Dawang and I sat on the highest mountain of Huaguo Mountain and smoothed each other's hair.

What a joke, how could we both have lice! !

"Gohan, your smoothing skills have become more and more refined."

"It's natural to be more careful to tickle the king."

"Gohan, you speak better than the other kids, that's why."

"As the king's left and right hands, I naturally bear more pressure, and I have grown up."

I looked at the king with sleepy eyes and immediately said: "If the king is sleepy, how about taking a nap on my lap for a while."

The king praised me for my carefulness.

Lie on my lap.

This is called a knee pillow, did you make it?

In this posture, I can just catch the tail of the king. The king has a tail, but the tail is a weakness for us monkeys. It is usually put away and only exposed when it is relaxed.

The king's tail is golden and fluffy, and it must feel good to the touch.

I touched it in a strange way.

The king opened his eyes.

I held his tail and laughed forcefully, "The hair on the tail is a bit fried, I'll give it to King Shun Shun."

"it is good."

The king nodded in agreement.

I dare to swear, no one is more professional than me in "how to precisely masturbate a monkey".

My five fingers are like a delicate machine, and every time I scratch the king, I will snort comfortably, scratching me from the tip of the tail to the root of the tail,

Animals are more sensitive at the base of their tails or wings. If you don’t believe me, try buying a live chicken or rabbit from the market.

When I scratched there, the king jumped up suddenly, "Gohan! What are you doing!"

I pretended to be innocent, "Your Majesty, scratch your itch."

As a born stone monkey with a simple personality, the king only felt that the scratch just now was different from before, but he couldn't tell what was the difference, and he was really puzzled.

"My lord, lie down." I greeted warmly.

The king had no choice but to put aside the weird feeling just now, and continued to lie down. After a while, the strange feeling came again, and he reflexively wanted to jump up, but he had already lost him by jumping up just now. In front of Gohan, isn't he the Monkey King, Monkey King, the Monkey King who can call out even when he is tickled?

So the king endured, enduring the piercing itch.

What's going on!Why scratching makes it tickle more and more!

why!why!

In the end, they were all scratched and confused, humming and chirping non-stop.

It's true that the ape on the top of the mountain can't help crying, the more it scratches, the more itchy it gets.