Forced to open

Let Lu Yuan know He Yu's existence...but I'm a mother and I do everything just hoping they can be by my side. "

There are always several sides to one thing. Lu Yuan couldn't see his mother when he was young, so he was very obedient when they met, and he was afraid of being abandoned. Until now, he is still the same when facing the person he cherishes.As for Xu Shuhua, she probably never considered Lu Yuan's possible struggle and rebellion after meeting Pei Heyu, or the solution she chose for herself was to obey Lu Zhenwei who had more power to speak in front of Lu Yuan...

"You may not be clear, my mother also has two children, and my brother and I are not the same father..." After listening to Xu Shuhua's words, Yu Qing suddenly missed her mother, and in this miss There is also gratitude and understanding, "We grew up under the same roof, my mother was very good to me, and my brother was very resistant to my existence. Sometimes I feel that I don't belong to their family of three, and my brother sometimes Because of me as an 'outsider', I feel that my mother treats him badly, but more often I see my mother working hard for the two of us."

"... "

"To tell you the truth, my brother is not a worrying child. My mother worried about him until she died, and hoped that I could take care of him. I am not a parent, so I don't know what the choice is What is best for the child may not be the best choice at all. But my mother is responsible for her choice, she did not whitewash peace with deceit and lies, she let me see that the world is miserable, but also after I saw Take my hand and lead me forward."

Yu Qing spoke calmly and kept her emotions in her heart as much as possible.He tightly held the bag in his hand, feeling heartbroken for Lu Yuan. He restrained his impulse, fearing that he would say to the elders in front of him: "You don't have the courage of my mother. Your choice will bring Lu Yuan unavoidable suffering and pain." , but you don’t even dare to solve it by yourself, constantly relying on someone with more power to speak...'

This is too serious, it should not be said by Yu Qing, an outsider.These words are too light, and they can't make up for what Lu Yuan missed these years.

Yu Qing's heart is full of compassion, and she can't help feeling sorry for Lu Yuan.He once felt that his mother left a 'seed' in his body that hurt others, but now it seems that his mother has also left a more precious wealth, so that Yu Qing can face everything directly.

"Auntie," Yu Qing took a deep breath, looked at Xu Shuhua again after calming down, and said honestly, "I'm sorry that the relationship between you is different from what you think. But I guess, Lu Yuan may also hope that I can communicate with you. This is every child's idea, but Lu Yuan couldn't find a suitable way..."

"... "

"I know more or less about the relationship between you and him. I think he lacked your company when he was a child, so he didn't learn how to get along with you..." Yu Qing sighed helplessly, pinching the fingers of the bag slowly Let go, "I'm not with Lu Yuan now, we may not be the kind of relationship you think...You ask me, I don't know what I can do for you."

"But I gave you the video to make up for the original. Are you unwilling to help me like this..."

The conversation ended without a problem, and Yu Qing didn't know what he could do, let alone what it meant to get this video again.

16-3 (second update)

"Qingqing, I want to go back to find you, but something happened... Please watch this video." At the beginning of the video, Lu Yuan was wearing a hospital gown and his left leg was hung on a brace with a plaster cast. Very emaciated, red-rimmed eyes.

His voice was full of doubts and urgency, "We clearly agreed, but how could you choose to leave me after taking my dad's money? Love... can you not leave me? Is my dad threatening you, isn't it? He forced you? If you have any unspeakable secrets or difficulties, you must tell me, and I will help you solve it.

You said you want to use that money to see the world and different places, shall I take you there?

Don't go alone, okay?

You also said that my love with you is no match for money.

How can I save our love, you tell me!If you need money, can I give it to you? "

---

Lu Yuan paused for a moment, then took a deep breath, looked at the camera and mustered up his courage, as if he had used all his strength to make himself speak, "I...I have told you about my past experience, but I didn't tell you. .. I shut myself off after that and couldn't feel the love."

"I haven't felt love for several years. This place is empty, very dark, and very scared..." He raised a hand and thumped his left chest hard, "Until your appearance... Qingqing, it was you who made me feel love again. I never thought that I could get out of that state, I dare not think... But, it was you who brought me out.

I love you, love.I feel... I can only love you, so please don't leave me.

I know how we get along, something went wrong recently, I pushed you away, hurt you, sorry...

These, these are because of my body...the therapist said I don't know how to balance, said I need your help..."

---

When Lu Yuan said this, tears fell, eyes full of embarrassment, "I don't know how to tell you, you are so enthusiastic, but I don't respond to you. I obviously don't think that way in my heart, but my body is just indifferent.

I absolutely hate this feeling, hate my own body, hate it for hurting you...

I'm also terrified of you finding out that I feel like...not a normal man...not even a man...

Qingqing, I don't know if you can understand this feeling?My heart is full when I think of you, but my body doesn't listen at all.

When I rarely come up with some thoughts, should I go to others to prove that my body is fine and that I am a man...

But this kind of thinking makes me very disgusted, disgusting myself, disgusting that I can't love you...

Disgusting I react to other people but can't do anything to you...

My therapist said I need your help, that I can't handle my feelings.

He asked me to tell you, he said I might get better if you had my back.

He said I need a partner's company...

But I...can't open my mouth...

Qingqing, facing you, I... really can't open my mouth...

I'm sorry, if it's because of my cowardice that I misunderstood you, I'm really... sorry..."

---

Lu Yuan almost broke down in tears, and after a long time calmed down, he looked back at the camera, "Your voice was so indifferent when you called me, I felt like I believed that you were really going to leave me.

I don't want to believe it, but because of my physical condition, it's really easy for me to believe it... I don't think I deserve love at all.

I beg you, please don't say such heartless things to me... I can't take it, I really can't take it.

You said you didn't take our love seriously, and you asked me what's so scary?

I'm afraid that you will leave me, our love is everything in my heart...Of course I'm afraid...

Can you stop giving me love and throw me back into the abyss?

Sometimes I think, why don't I just leave you, so that I don't have to face such an unbearable self, and you can live a better life.

But, I really can't do it... I know I'm selfish, but I really can't do it.

Qingqing, wait until I can get out of bed, and I will go back to you.Before that, can you give me a little chance...

A little is enough...

I beg you..."

---

At the end of the video, Lu Yuan wiped away his tears, his tone was full of humbleness, his eyes were full of fear, "Qingqing, I don't need 'sex', as long as I have you, I don't need anything.

Can you...don't dislike me...

I really despise myself now, but I beg you... don't despise me...

If you hate me, I don't know what to do...

Love, I really don't know what to do.

I beg you…"

---

The video lasted about ten minutes, but Yu Qing was in tears after watching it.

The operation was almost over, he was sitting alone in the ward, while Xu Shuhua and Pei Heyu were waiting for Lu Yuan at the door of the operating room.

Yu Qing took a deep breath and closed the computer. He put the video in his pocket, not wanting anyone to see it.

Lu Yuan's fear in the video broke his heart, and he didn't know how to deal with the ensuing emotions.

"Lu Yuan, please leave my life completely... Nothing you send will affect me, I don't care about everything in that video, I just feel that it's very pathetic for you to do so..."

"You... want to tell me this after watching the video? Yu Qing, I didn't expect you to dislike me so much."

"Yes. Lu Yuan, the last bit of 'beauty' is gone now."

Yu Qing left the ward to go out to breathe, standing in the afterglow of the sunset, she couldn't stop crying.It had been snowing for several days, and today it finally cleared up. The orange-red slanting sun hit Yu Qing's cheeks, rendering the tear stains a layer of warmth.What he recalled was the phone call two years ago, the word 'dislike' in Lu Yuan's mouth was in his thoughts, and he responded with 'yes'.

If he had seen this video then... what would he have done?

---

Yu Qing stood outside the hospital for a long time, until the sun completely went down, until the phone Pei Heyu had temporarily given him in his pocket rang.

"Lu Yuan's surgery is over, and now he is back in the ward, he is basically awake." Pei Heyu lowered his voice on the other end of the phone, and said, "But his father just came over, and the two of them started arguing again, you Why don't you come up later, I'll see his dad