Confessions of a retired star

Zhu Shisi put the beer back silently, walked out of the convenience store, walked into the rainstorm, walked to the intersection, and stopped a taxi that was slowly approaching.

The wine is completely sober, he should go back, the decadent appearance drenched by rain is not good for colleagues to see, it will be a disappointment.

In the car, the driver looked at the dripping Zhu Shisi curiously from the rearview mirror, and replaced the air conditioner with warm natural wind, and adjusted the air volume to the maximum.

Knowing that the other party was out of good intentions, Zhu Shisi did not stop the driver. The silk clothes became heavy after being soaked in water, and it was very tight and cold on the same wet skin. When the wind blew, Zhu Shisi's nose was cold and painful. He expected I am going to catch a cold.

On a rainy night, driving from the suburbs to the city was smooth. Zhu Shisi got out of the car after several sneezes. Si wandered in a daze for a few steps in the heavy rain, and found the access control of the apartment in a daze. He entered the lobby twice after entering the wrong password.

This warm space is extremely quiet. Zhu Shisi walked slowly towards the elevator, and the drops of water falling from his body followed his steps and rattled all the way. When he stepped into the elevator, the rainwater pooled under his feet Beach dark round.

The reflective elevator door closed like a mirror, Zhu Shisi stared blankly at the reflection in the mirror, her wet hair drooped in locks on her sunken cheeks, the whites and kernels of her eyes were combined like a patch on a doll, motionless , Under the light, the face is white, the neck is white, the chest is white, the water falls from the head, through the clothes that bind the body, strand by strand, continuously, like a rain man about to melt.

More like a drowned ghost, Zhu Shisi sneered at the elevator door.

The sixteenth floor is here.

The rain followed Zhu Shisi, and dragged a winding road behind his heavy footsteps. Before opening the door, Zhu Shisi kicked something.

His sluggish nerves did not respond, and he continued to rely on muscle memory to unlock the door. Before entering the door, he kicked again with a bang, and things rolled around a few times. Only then did Zhu Shisi notice the source of the sound under his feet.

A square, small iron box like bread.

And Q Bu, it should be said that it is exactly the same as the box at Fang Ting's house.

Zhu Shisi was stunned for nearly half a minute, then picked up the iron box that was rolling wet, gently pushed aside a corner of its lid, and vaguely saw a stack of messy postcards in the gap.

Boom, his heart skipped a beat slowly, Zhu Shisi's sluggish eyes widened suddenly, and then his heart started beating wildly, he hurriedly glanced at the elevator entrance and the safe passage, but there was no one there, he hugged Picking up the box, he strode into the living room, came to the window, and pulled open the curtains.

The iron box fell from the hand to the sofa, and the night rain floated in from the window, carrying the smell of rolling dust, and floated onto Zhu Shisi's face.

It was pitch black on the opposite side, only dense raindrops slanting across the dark gray field of vision quickly, Fang Ting was not standing at the corner of the glass on the seventeenth floor, and there was no light on the opposite side.

After a very short loss, Zhu Shisi hurriedly pulled up the curtains, took out the mobile phone from his trouser pocket, a cold light lit up in the dark living room, the screen was very wet and slippery, and the touch was not good, Zhu Shisi wiped it again and again with the back of his hand, Finally, he clicked on Fang Ting's number.

call him?Don't call him?

The screen was stained with water stains, and many red and green pixels appeared on it. Zhu Shisi walked around and stepped on a hard piece of paper. The touch felt like a letter. The letter dropped from the coffee table to the ground was Fang Dictation.

Fang listened.Zhu Shisi chanted the name, snapped on the headlights in the living room, and pressed the dial button at the same time.

The full light fell, and the sound of the rain seemed to be quieter. In the handset soaked in water, the dial made a buzzing sound.

Then, Zhu Shisi saw the postcards spilled from the iron box mixed with the envelopes on the coffee table and sofa, and then Zhu Shisi heard "Hello, the user you dialed has turned off the phone".

He suddenly hated listening to Fang.How can Fang Ting come and leave as if nothing had happened, leaving "evidence" to let Zhu Shisi know that he has been here before he left, and tell Zhu Shisi that it is impossible for you to forget me.

He also knows that this kind of hatred is hypocritical, unreasonable, self-inflicted, and deserves it.

Get out quickly and stop losses in time, isn't that how adults should feel?

So after a short period of hatred, Zhu Shisi regained his calm, put away his mobile phone, picked up the postcards and letters, and mopped the floor like a mature adult should. water.

Oh, it turned out to be the water on the clothes, and I forgot to change them. After busying for a long time, my efforts were wasted, Zhu Shisi fell on the sofa weakly, and the postcards and letters I had collected were also thrown on the ground.

Yellowed and snow-white papers, dry and wet letters were spread on the floor, covering the water marks tightly. Zhu Shisi slept on the edge of the cushion, hands hanging down, eyes staring at them, and his mind went blank.

The letter closest to the finger was almost completely wet, and the dark blue font slowly penetrated onto the envelope with faint yellow spots, paragraph by paragraph, and the content was intermittent.

"Is the red mole in your eyes two on the left and one on the right? I am suddenly curious about this matter... I miss you very much... Just looking at the code name with numbers can't ease my yearning."

Zhu Shisi blinked his frozen eyes, his eyes regained a trace of vitality, and his eyes slowly patrolled the hill made of papers. At the foot of the coffee table, Zhu Shisi saw the corresponding reply letter.

"Second from the left, first from the right, have you even forgotten what I look like?"

The inscription reads the words "Zhushisi" in bold and bold.

"Heh..." Zhu Shisi laughed. He still remembered how angry and secretly happy when he wrote this sentence nine years ago. At that time, he really regarded Fang Ting as Fang Shuyun, and acted like a baby in the postcard for no reason, which was so embarrassing.

What was Fang Ting's reply at that time?Zhu Shisi's fingers idly flicked through the pile of letters, found the envelope with the corresponding date stamp, pulled out the letter paper, and the smell of time rushed to Zhu Shisi's clogged breath.

"I will never forget you! I miss you, I miss you very much, I want to know your news, can I? Your current situation, news, past events and future plans, everything is fine, I want to know, tell me .”

The words are messed up, and the content is also messed up. Why didn't you feel something was wrong before?Although the handwriting of the two brothers is similar, Fang Shuyun needs to be more neat and tidy, and he will not rush to write such straightforward words in the letter. Looking back, these impatient words are all written by Fang Ting.

Zhu Shisi became interested, sat up, and rummaged through the postcards for Fang.

"How about me? My 16-year-old brother and I are airborne trainees in group A, and we are under a lot of pressure. Some people in the same group have been training for four or five years, some are child stars, and the 16-year-old brother can sing. , I can't do anything, and I can only sing nursery rhymes. I'm so stupid. Alas, it's a bad feeling to be an underachiever. I hope my situation will become better when I receive your next reply ..."

Did you include Mu Di?Zhu Shisi laughed secretly at his frankness to "Fang Shuyun". When he first joined the company, he was really stupid. Every time he was assessed, he got stuck. How did he cheer up afterwards?Zhu Shisi curiously found Fang Ting's reply.

"Each of us has a small universe in the palm of our hand, holding it is holding infinite possibilities, so you can do what you want to do."

One sentence, dozens of words, struck Zhu Shisi's heart stroke by stroke, this sentence is so familiar, as if he said it just yesterday, evoked secret memories, fragments gradually emerged from the deep sea, There are scattered light spots, swaying swings, wind, trees, tears, and glass cubes passed from one palm to another.

The forehead hurt slightly, and the lazy wry smile was replaced by a solemn sadness that wanted to cry. Zhu Shisi held his breath, picked up the paper mountains and put them on the sofa, and arranged them one by one according to the time.

Zhu Shisi saw a long period of dialogue spanning nine years, from teenagers to teenagers, to teenagers to youths, to youths to youths.

He said that training made his physical fitness better, and asked him his overseas number and whether he would come back for the Spring Festival.He replied that it is not convenient now, and they will definitely meet in the future.

He said that he had lost his sense of proportion, apologized to him, and complained to him that his dancing posture was ridiculed by his companions.He comforted him and amuse him by writing a hundred childish and corny jokes on five pages of stationery.

He announced the good news to him, told him that he was finally praised by his agent, complacently wrote outdated Internet slang, and threatened to eat sweets to avenge his shame.He said that you are getting better and will get better, and you are destined to be the focus of attention.

He said that he performed on stage and saw girls screaming for him, but he was still confused, afraid that he would not be able to make his debut, and also confused by the fact that he had studied hard and only got a high school diploma.He said that it is the darkest before dawn, and fate will make up for the lost things in another way, and he will accompany him until the moment of dawn.

He is about to debut, and he and a good friend became the double C of the group. He said that this person reminds me of you and the days when I studied with you.He scraped off the correction fluid under "study together", and when he saw the words "together", he wrote only one sentence in reply, "Great, congratulations", which had a sour taste.

He went on to describe the embarrassing things he and his teammates had done. He had seen novels written by other people about them falling in love, kissing and doing other unsightly things.His letter was even shorter, with four large characters and a question mark, up and down, left and right, covering a whole sheet of paper——Do you like him?

He denied that he likes his teammates, he told him not to misunderstand, and said that he is only friendly to him now.His replies became longer, telling about the books he had read recently, the trees he had planted, and the baseball games he had attended, with pleasant breaths jumping between the lines.

Then he made his debut. He wrote that he had never seen such enthusiastic support, that he was called a teacher by the former high-spirited entertainer, that he was so busy that he would fly to three cities in one day to run around, and that he wrote about the places he saw It’s all their promotional materials. It’s written that he was attacked and abused by black fans without doing anything. It’s written that his combination double C position will become a single C position. He and his teammates made an appointment to compete fairly. Up and down, and then, he said that something happened to his teammates, he was subjected to verbal violence, and the popularity of the group was not as good as before. He was very sad.

He has been with him all the time, witnessing his youthfulness, dormancy, popularity, heyday and sudden fall, and then getting back up again, working hard with the rest of his teammates to rejuvenate the group, watching him begin to transform into an actor, watching him struggle for exposure Don't play bad with his teammates, and watch his combination change from four to three, and fall into a trough again...

He was with him all the time.

For nine years, Fang Ting has been with Zhu Shisi, and Zhu Shisi has been with Fang Ting.

Tears fell, and the 99 postcards sent to Fang Ting returned to Zhu Shisi, held in his left hand, and the 99 replies received from Fang Ting were held in his trembling right hand.

There is also a postcard in the middle, date: April 22nd, which is the one that was taken away by "Q Bu" before Zhushisi had time to send it out that day. It originally belonged to Fang Ting.

Zhu Shisi's tearful eyes finally stopped on this postcard, and he saw that under the few lines of his own words, there were some fresh short sentences that were still shiny with ink——

The author has something to say: this chapter took longer to write than expected, the sweet part is scheduled for the next chapter, and it will be released as soon as possible tomorrow!