[The Big Bang Theory] Cohabitation strategy

On the plane back to California from Colorado, I held Sheldon's hand tightly, and it was difficult to breathe.Sheldon asked strangely: "Oh, Cardo, can I ask you the reason for your symptoms—pale face, fainting signs—? I'm going to consider whether to contact the medical staff."

How could he understand me... I'm like this because I'm going back to Pasadena soon, and I can't breathe just thinking about them coming to see me like they're spectating aliens!God, actually, I am also surprised by this matter...

I told Sheldon why.He looked at me strangely and said, "Oh! Could it be? Isn't that a normal thing?"

I asked him back: "Think about it, a recognized mitotic breeder, one day suddenly... er, you know, what would you think if it were you?"

Sheldon shrugged, "I will feel sorry for him going nowhere." He paused for a moment before suddenly realizing, "Could it be me! God, it's unbelievable."

I made an expression of "I'm so speechless" at him, then silently grabbed his hand and continued to calm down.

After getting off the plane, I turned on my mobile phone, and a total of 23 text messages rushed to me.I was so scared that I almost dropped my phone on the ground! !

I looked it up with shaking hands, and all the items were: "Are you there?" On beautiful days, we welcome you LOL"...

Sheldon and I looked at each other, raised the mobile phone in hand, and asked me: "They haven't been so enthusiastic, have they?"

I said painfully: "Absolutely not!"

We put the down jackets we didn't use in Pasadena into our backpacks, kept a certain distance tacitly, and walked outside the airport.

Leonard's car was parked across the street, and Penny and Leonard saw us and immediately waved their hands.Penny said, "Look, the happy couple is back!"

And Leonard's smile is... very cheap, the kind that the eyebrows are about to fly.I made a pause gesture and coughed: "Comeon, can you stop looking at us like that. If you can not mention some unrefined things, we are still good friends."

Penny spread her hands and said helplessly: "Oh, Sweety, don't say that! The thing I'm looking forward to the most these days is that you can talk about this when you come back. You don't know, we also set up a special recording team. Well, you know, A crew is everyone except you."

... Such gossip!I looked like I was about to faint, but Petunia immediately supported me and said with a smile, "Oh, honey, don't cry."

Shelton yelled, "Oh, that's not fair! We're your talking point?"

Petunia said reassuringly, "You're welcome, dear."

If Leonard doesn't say anything, it makes people want to vomit blood: "Oh, Penny, it's not a talk, it's sympathy for the 32-year virgin|boy."

Sheldon yelled, "Oh, Leonard!!!"

Sheldon and I exchanged glances.I took his hand, and he shook it back, indicating that the two of us should stand on a united front—never compromise with the evil forces, and fight this evil physique to the end!

And then... Penny stuffed us in the back seat and we drove back to Pasadena.

When I got back to the apartment, I looked at the door of the apartment with a smile, hehehe, the shadowy figure inside, could it be my hallucination?

The door was pulled open from the inside, and Penny and Leonard took a silent step back.Then, Howard and Raj rushed out, each holding a firework...

"boom!"

The fluttering confetti fell on the unsuspecting Sheldon and me.They also exclaimed excitedly: "Oh, congratulations!!!"

I was about to yell at Raj, but he blinked aggrievedly, and I turned my head: "... Howard!!!"

Howard gave us an elegant (?) salute, "Welcome back, beautiful Kado and her knight Sheldon. So, how do you feel, um, Sheldon?" He raised his hand with a smirk , winking at Sheldon.

I stared at him silently, then pulled Sheldon up.Shelton also turned his head and replied: "Oh, if you're asking about our sex|intercourse, that's great."

"OMG!!" Penny screamed.

"My God, that's incredible!!!" Bernadette's voice was even higher.

"Sheldon!" I rubbed my forehead.What he said! ! ......==

My face was hot, and I hurriedly transported Sheldon and the luggage back to 5A, blocking their prying eyes, and ignoring their eagerness to come in, sat down and made an agreement with him, "Don't reveal any psychological and explicit feelings, thank you I will feel very embarrassed." Will Harmony know this, don't you understand that it is now prostitution!

Sheldon said, "Are you shy?" There was an exclamation immediately outside the door.I was crazy, "Yes!"

"Oh," he said, "well, I won't."

Then I opened the door slowly, and the people outside were smiling and pretending to be serious.I said: "...Everyone, please come in."

"Oh, Sheldon, we already told your mother that she is praying to God, so she may not be able to return your call right away. But she said that she will come back after Christmas, and bring your wedding presents along the way. ’” Raj said, clutching his chest affectionately.

"Oh, I said why I can't get through to her phone!" Shelton grabbed the phone and said, "But in late January, I will go back to China with Cardo..."

"My God, when you get to China, you must keep your mouth shut." Howard said exaggeratedly, "I'm starting to regret teaching him Chinese seven years ago-I'm really afraid that Kaduo's parents would give birth The idea of ​​Sheldon killing..."

"Shut up, Howard," I said as I sipped my water.

"I understand, I understand." Howard walked over with an expression of someone who had been there, "I bet Sheldon's time is short, Cardo."

Before I could say anything, Shelton said with great disapproval: "You're wrong, Howard. From our stamina and size, I definitely have longer time than you."

Pfft, that seems to make sense.I smiled smugly at Howard to see how he reacted.

Howard opened his eyes wide and froze for a few seconds, tilted his head and spread his hands, "Well, indeed."

Petunia patted Leonard on the arm and said to him, "Oh, I really like watching Sheldon say dirty jokes without knowing it."

Sheldon said that the dirty jokes are really... cute in contrast?And he has a serious face, which makes people think he did it on purpose!Sheldon was very helpless, "Please! I'm not talking. I'm just stating a fact! You know, I'm indeed more durable than Howard."

Enough... Do you understand the shy Chinese standing here... If it was someone else, I would definitely laugh too.But the protagonist is me, this feeling... There is a hint of sadness mixed with helplessness...

"Oh, another dirty joke."

Sheldon rolled his eyes, confused.I tried to bring the conversation back to our nice ski trip, but their eyes were stark|naked "we don't care about that, we only care about some dissonant things"... Peat, what the hell is there to watch ! !

In the end, I was dragged to 4B by Penny and Bernadette, and the eager light in their eyes almost blinded me.Petunia asked: "How the hell did it happen? God, I still think this is a dream!!"

I fell down on the sofa in compromise and said, "It was the first night when I arrived...the atmosphere was great...and then it just happened. Do you need anything else!"

Bernadette said: "No one would have thought that Sheldon would be so soon... Howard and Raj bet whether you will have sex in three years or six years."

...What the hell is this bet!I took a sip of juice and pretended I was drinking.Next to me, Petunia said in the tone of a vicissitudes old man: "Oh, time is so fast... Sheldon has grown up..."

"Will I also call you mother in the future?" What a witty joke... I clinked glasses with Petunia.Petunia said reassuringly, "No, honey. You'll become his mother..."

Bernadette said: "Frankly, Penny won, really."

The three of us laughed and fell on the sofa.Bernadette asked, "How do you feel? Being with Sheldon..."

"Uh, it's pretty good."

"Oh, that's not what I asked!!" Bernadette said. "Bed?"

"Cough..." I tried my best to escape from these two gossiping women, but I was firmly held back, forcing me to speak out, "Okay, let me think about it!!"

The two looked at me excitedly.

I recall, "Well, not bad...you two care so strangely!"

The two shrugged helplessly, "This is Sheldon, if it's Howard/Leonard, I won't care..."

What a tacit understanding, I lost to you... I peeled the orange and threw it into my mouth, "Oh, Sheldon is so popular, I am so distressed!"

Penny asked me the frequency again.The scale is so big... I gestured and said firmly: "The last question!" Then I told them.

"Oh! He's actually normal!" Bernadette said in amazement, "You don't need to worry about him at all, Cardo."

I pretended to be drunk and laughed.Penny said, "Come on, I've never met anyone who got drunk on juice. Oh, Leonard emailed me!"

I returned to normal and asked, "Do you still communicate by email?"

"Oh, no. He's just posting a compilation of Sheldon's nasty jokes...the audio version, do you want to listen to it guys?"

I want!"

I can't resist the charm of Sheldon's dirty jokes_(:з」∠)_

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In the evening, we had dinner at 4A, and Sheldon would play Halo after dinner.We had a great night.

The author has something to say: I don’t have time to update the article tonight, I can only update it halfway, sorry~

In the future, it will be updated every other day.If I have time, I will update it daily.

Completed.