[Comprehensive] Escape from shame is useless

The author has something to say: This chapter is rewritten, a cold really reduces intelligence ==

The remaining half will be updated in the next chapter when I finish writing it orz

happy New Year to all.

In the depths of the forest where the faint morning light could not see, Akashi walked silently alone.

The forest path is so narrow that only one person can pass, along the side of the road grows plants that have never been seen before, one palm high, the stems and leaves are bent down by the fluffy and soft fruits like buds, exuding faint blue fluorescence .Stretching out from the darkness out of sight, it seemed to be covered with some kind of red objects. After observing it intently, it left blurry afterimages and meaningless color spots on the retina.

It was only for a moment to stop and observe, and he turned his gaze to the other end of the invisible path again, and stepped forward.

Until he embarked on this path of no return, he still couldn't fully understand why Jasmine also chose to leave.

Is it really like the other self said, just because he no longer wants to do things according to his arrangement?Even if he knew that everything he did was to make her music dream go further, wouldn't he want to continue?

Saying that she feels tired and doesn't want to move forward is all an excuse, maybe other people will, but Jasmine never stops because of these things.If she thought that his behavior was against her wishes, then she would have resisted during the Diguang Festival, and would have said it when he used "name change" to test her, instead of saying nothing like now. Don't stay, just disappear out of thin air.

But for a moment of emotion, a moment of rebellion, abandon the music she relies on for survival, leave her "only audience", and exile herself?Unlike others, Jasmine could not survive without her music.At this point, she has no right to be willful at all, and she will never take everything about herself to make such a joke.

He couldn't understand or agree with this conclusion.

unless--

For Jasmine, there is nothing more important than music in this world, which even makes her give up her life to defend it to the end.

But that kind of thing... really exists?

Could it be possible that Jasmine, who had no secrets in front of him, would hide such an important thing from him?

No.

Of that, he was sure.

So such a thing does not exist.

So why is she doing all this now?

My thinking went back to the origin again here, and I couldn't find the right direction.

But no matter what, he must take her back, no matter what the cost!

I don't know how long it has been, the concept of time has lost its meaning here, and the hands of the watch stopped working when they entered.

A hazy voice appeared in my ears at some point, it seemed to come from an extremely distant place, vague, chaotic, and indistinguishable.In this half-disappearing voice, there is a sentence that is so clear that it is particularly out of place.

[If you want, can you and your music be brought into my kingdom of God? 】

Kingdom of God?

His footsteps stopped for a moment, and then he stepped out quickly in the next second. His long legs drove the movement of his whole body, and he ran fast in the wind.

The vague voice gradually became clear, but it still seemed to be on the other side of the world through a water curtain.

faster.

【Yes, I'm sorry, Miss Shiya didn't want to become like this, I shouldn't...】

Hurry up!

【So Jasmine too, come with me. 】

No!

At the end of the road, there is a mirror made of water waves.On the other end, Jasmine was also turning her back to him, wanting to hold the hand of that terrifying goddess!

"Don't go! Jasmine too!"

Without the slightest hesitation, he jumped up and passed through the suspicious looking mirror, stepping into this dark fantasy land.

"You promised me that you would not accept any invitation from the gods, you would not go to the Kingdom of God, and you would stay by my side forever!"

The storm roared, sweeping through this small space in an instant.Countless reds in his field of vision were swept into the wind, and he realized belatedly that what grew in the invisible deep place was this gorgeous and coquettish flower of the underworld.But this dazzling color is still not as good as the hairband flying between the girl's brown hair under the golden sky light.

Wearing it, it was like telling him silently that she still remembered the oath they made, and never forgot it for a moment.

But the moment she turned around, it broke and fell.

"A promise like this... is doomed to fail."

Akashi didn't understand the meaning of her words immediately.

He twisted the hair tie that was blown back to his body, held it tightly, and looked up at Jasmine again.

"Why? As long as you think, you can do it." As long as you don't take the initiative to hold the hand of the goddess, she will not take you to the kingdom of God.

"No, Zhengjun knows it clearly." She looked at his eyebrows and eyes sadly, "Sometimes no matter what we think or do, we can't change the final outcome. This kind of persistence is meaningless in the end."

"Why not? As long as you say—"

"If I say, I don't want to be treated, I don't want to take medicine, can my parents not send me to the hospital? If I say, I don't want everyone to live in fear because of me, Yuna can let go of those ordinary people. Classmate? If I say that I don't want to perform on stage, Masaki-kun, will you change your plan because of my words?" Jasmine also interrupted Akashi's speech excitedly, but she didn't intend to really ask him to answer.Because the answer is self-evident——

"They won't, and neither will you, because you always insist on being right, and you always have too many reasons to convince me."

Say she is ignorant, say she is willful, say she knows no good and evil, all kinds of reasons!Grandiose grounds!

She couldn't refute, there was no way to refute.Once she said it, it seemed that she didn't know what to do, she was really ignorant, and she couldn't understand other people's good intentions.So I can only shut up and be obedient.

Because this kind of thing has been repeated so many times, she has become used to ignoring her own feelings.

Because no one cares.

So, she didn't even notice that she was angry.Therefore, she didn't even realize why she was sad.

Tears slipped down her cheeks silently, and her chest was in heavy pain, but Jasmine still showed a hazy and ethereal smile to Akashi.Tianguang gently kissed her eyes, and her long hair, like an angel leading a stray into the mortal world, unswervingly spread light to her.Jasmine also took the initiative to reach out her hand, turning her back on the bright world, and wanted to touch the dark side.

"Zhengjun, tell me, is it really that important whether I want it or not?"

No one saw her heart, and over time, even she herself habitually refused to listen or read.

But pain doesn't go away just because you don't care about it, and hurt doesn't disappear just because you don't see it.

Her heart was already riddled with holes, her spirit was already crumbling, and she had already stepped into the abyss, but no one knew about it.

"Do you really care about my feelings?"

【In front of us, she will always be so fragile that she will break at the touch of a finger. 】

At this moment, he suddenly understood what the other self said.

She looked into his eyes, filled with pain and despair, like a bird trapped in a cage and unable to fly, as fragile as if its wings would be snapped off in the next second.

There was a dull pain in the heart like never before.

It turns out that... if you hurt her, you will also feel pain.

He never felt pain before, not because he could perfectly control his emotions, but——

Jasmine would never show this expression in front of him, and would never say words to express her sincerity.

So as long as you don't think about it, you can pretend you don't know.

No matter what he wanted her to do, Jasmine did it, without complaining or procrastinating, and perfectly completed everything he expected her to do.So he can tell himself that "Jasmine is also very strong", and can deceive himself that "her heart is strong enough, even a little setback can't defeat her", and push forward those plans with high names.

[I am doing it for her own good, this is her own wish. 】

It seems that the more times you say it, the more it becomes true.

It seems that as long as she doesn't complain, get angry, or cry, it means she approves, supports, and won't be sad.

He clearly knew that Jasmine was too sensible and had long been used to hiding all emotions in her heart, but he still forced her as if she didn't know anything, urged her, and insisted on pulling her forward.

It's not that she doesn't feel pain, it's not that she isn't sad, it's just that she has no choice.

She had to respond to all his demands.

Because in front of him, she didn't even have the freedom to say "no".

Say something if you don't want it, just resist it, say something if you don't want it, just refuse it.Knowing that she has no right to choose at all, she still takes it for granted that she has the opportunity to express her will, as if she has the opportunity to reverse his decision.

Obviously even if she refused, he would still try his best to persuade her until she nodded.If he fails to achieve his goal, he will never give up.Jasmine just knew it, so she even omitted the process of expressing herself, because she knew that no matter whether she said it or not, the result would be the same.

This was what he called the freedom he had given her.

This so-called right to choose is just a cover to force her to act according to her own will.

And until the second before the meeting, all he could think about was taking her back no matter what she wanted to do, no matter what means he had to use.

It turned out that if she didn't say anything, he could really turn a blind eye to this level.

It turned out that he himself was far more of a jerk than he thought!

"You don't care about her, I care. I can give her what you can't give her. As long as you come with me, Jasmine can get everything she wants." The Goddess of Huangquan deliberately glanced away before turning to Jasmine. Akashi said, "So, ignore him, hold my hand, and you will be completely relieved."

"That's right..." She was already tired, whether it was forcing herself to do something she didn't want to do, or trying to respond to their demands on her.She didn't want to hurt anyone, and she didn't want to continue hurting herself.

Anyway, what she wants...will never get.

Stretching out her hand to the goddess with a terrifying face, Jasmine also took a step towards the dark place away from the light of the sky with tears in her eyes.

"no!"

Akashi rushed over, trying to grab Jasmine's hand, but was blocked by an invisible barrier one meter away.

"We care about you, of course we care about you! Don't go with her, neither does Jasmine!"

"Liar!" She stopped and yelled with her back turned to him, "This is just an excuse for you to trick me back!"

"no--"

She turned around angrily, and the anger that had been suppressed for a long time spewed out.

"A person like Zhengjun can say anything in order to achieve his goal! I know that you must be full of expedient measures now, so you will say such things to me! When I really go back, Mom and Dad You will still send me to the hospital, and you will force me to perform on stage, nothing will change at all!"

Yes, if he could change his mind so easily with a sentence or two, he wouldn't be the Akashi Seijuro she knew.

Only one or two words from him to make others obey his situation, and vice versa, does not exist at all!

"That's right, this new guest. If you really care about Jasmine's feelings, you should stand here obediently and say goodbye to her now, instead of trying to trick her back to the ordinary world with sweet words." Izanami was also there. Adding fuel to the fire, "She wants to leave with me now, so you have to respect her choice. Or, you say you care, but you still want to 'continue' interfering with Jasmine's decision?"

As soon as the word interference was uttered, Jasmine sensitively took another step back, stood beside the goddess, and stared at him vigilantly.

For the first time being looked at with suspicious eyes by someone who has always trusted him wholeheartedly, Akashi's heart ached beyond measure.I used to always laugh at those who only know how to cherish after losing it, thinking that such a thing would never happen to me with my own IQ.He didn't expect this retribution to come so fast and so ruthlessly that he was completely caught off guard.

He had indeed conceived countless developments, and considered almost all the ways to deal with it, in order to ensure that he could bring Jasmine back.But he never set such a cruel curse on himself under any assumption——

What should I do if Jasmine really no longer trusts him, and no longer believes any of his words?

"If you really hold her hand with a smile, and are willing to abandon everything and go to hell with her, I can fulfill you now." The unprecedentedly sincere words, without any concealment, directly expressed all his feelings at this moment. emotion.

But after Jasmine also heard it, her tears fell even more fiercely.

"Liar, you don't know it at all, you just tell me a bunch of big truths, get me involved, and make me change my decision!"

It's useless to say anything.

"I won't let you go with her because you are simply avoiding the problem now!"

"Escape? What did I escape? I'm just disappointed in you, so I don't want you!"

Knowing that she was only speechless because she was emotional, he was still stabbed by her words.

Is this what it feels like to be distorted?

It hurts so much, I can't continue to maintain a calm expression, I want to yell hoarsely, I want to grab the other party's collar and force her to listen to him.But he couldn't do it, he could only slam his fist on the barrier in vain, and then raised his voice, trying to put his words into her ears and into her heart in this way.

"If you really want to go with her, why are you crying like this? Do you want me to turn a blind eye to your crying face?"

But it still didn't work.

"So what? Haven't you always been indifferent to my tears?! Why do you suddenly feel it today? Do you think that I will be grateful for your curtains?"

When she was no longer willing to believe him, she could no longer listen to any of his words.

No matter how good his eloquence is, no matter how correct his arguments are, no matter how convincing his theories are, they all lose their meaning.

Heh, heh heh... How much extravagance was squandered by his previous self, he deeply felt it.

"Then what do you want me to do, what do you want me to do before you give up and stay?"

He was desperate, he was helpless, he didn't know what to do.

Akashi pressed his hands against the wall, almost begging her to give him an answer.

But Jasmine didn't want to give it either.

"You ask me? Aren't you the person who knows me best in this world? Aren't you Akashi Seijuro who will never do anything wrong? Come read my heart, come guess my thoughts, aren't you the best Is this one?"

Just like countless times before, he was always the first to discover her hidden thoughts, and to strike first, making her feelings the most suitable driving force for his next move.

"What do I want, don't you always know better than me?"

The original question that he hadn't been able to figure out again rang in Akashi's mind.

Why did Jasmine abandon him as an audience and her most important music and choose to leave.

No matter how you think about it, you can only come up with the only possibility, the absolutely impossible possibility——

She has something more important than music.

But it's impossible...

"You...have something more important than music?"

Impossible, he cannot accept this conclusion, this kind of—

"Ha, hehehe... Don't you know?" Jasmine also covered her face, unable to tell whether she was feeling more relaxed or more desperate at the moment.I don't know whether to be happy that he really understands her, or sad because he understands her so well but only uses this understanding to hurt her.

What?real?She has something bigger than music?

Akashi's expression was completely blank, and he was so shocked by this fact that he lost his ability to speak.For a moment, it seemed that even the brain stopped, and it seemed that he had thought too much, thousands of words came to his mind, but in the end he could only ask a question in a pale manner.

"...what is it?"

"But what does it matter to you?"

She stood up with no expression on her face, and took Izanami's hand.