shadow lover

The rain on the Tianjie Street is as crisp as the grass, but the grass color is far away but not close.

The most important thing is the one-year spring benefits.

After work, I was standing at the entrance of the shopping mall with my cosmetic case in hand. It was raining lightly outside. The weather forecast said that after the rain, the cold would fade away and the flowers would bloom. I walked along the road step by step without an umbrella or a taxi.Thinking about what happened recently in my mind, thinking of my lonely self before I met Sen Miao, and thinking of the subtle feelings between me and Sen Miao now, I raised my head and stood at the fork in the road, not knowing whether I should go left or right.

The book says that some lovers are not not in love but because of misunderstandings that lead to being unable to stay together for a lifetime. The book also says that love cannot withstand the slightest flaw. If you love, please cherish each other. If you don’t love, why torture each other and hate each other? Let go and return each other free.But the book also said that love is a life-and-death battle without gunpowder, and only the end of the war can win the final victory. Those who make excuses for themselves to escape halfway are all guys without integrity and incompetent cowards.

I think maybe it is because love has no unique appearance and exclusive explanation that it is so mysterious that all men and women who are looking forward to it yearn for it and pursue it without hesitation.

After walking for nearly half an hour, I stopped a taxi on the side of the street. When I got home, I took out the key to open the door. When I opened the door, I found that the door was not locked, pulled out the key and walked into the house.

"Hello uncle and aunt"

After entering the door, I saw Sen Miao’s parents in the room. The aunt said that Sen Miao was usually busy and didn’t have time. She used to come here by herself and she was upset. Now that she’s dating you, I have nothing to do with Sen Miao’s father. For a few days, I said that she and her uncle had both retired and had nothing to do, and they were all running after their children when they were older. I listened to water being poured and fruit in my hands.

"Sen Miao left us here and she went back to work, Anyang, don't be so busy, come sit and talk with auntie."

"Oh, okay, I'm going to tidy up the bedroom or I won't be able to live in it. That bedroom has been used as a storage room by Sen Miao because it has been empty before. I will tidy up and it will be ready soon."

"Old man, help me"

"No, no, I'll do it myself."

After entering the small bedroom, I started to organize the boxes on the floor. These are all things collected by Sen Miao. In addition to the books that cannot be placed in the bookcase, there are many CDs and tapes. I moved all the boxes to our bedroom and stepped on them. The stool holds the box above the wardrobe.

"Oh, I didn't fall on you, did I?"

"It's okay, I didn't step on it just now. Auntie, I'm fine. I'll pick up the things on the ground. Go and sit on the sofa." The plastic chair must be old, so it cracked before I stepped on it hard. After rubbing my legs Squat down to pick things up, put the disc back in the case and then move a new chair back on it.It wasn't until I discovered this cleaning that I felt that Sen Miao actually collected so many music products with a sense of age.

After I filled up all the space I could put, there were still four or five boxes with no place to put them. I took a look and put them behind the curtains in the living room. After tidying up the house, I started cleaning. The room was not dirty but dusty. I opened the window and left a small gap for ventilation, and finally went to the closet to dig out a new bedding and spread it.

"Anyang is exhausted, look at the sweat on this side."

"Not tired, auntie, do you and uncle want to go out to eat at night or eat at home?"

“Let's eat at home”

"Oh, then I'll go shopping for whatever you want to eat."

My aunt said that going out to eat is expensive and unhygienic. It’s better to cook at home. Before going out, I sent a message to Sen Miao saying that I won’t be going today, and then said that I will go to the supermarket with my aunt to buy vegetables. I will buy what you want to eat. .In the supermarket, I pushed the car and walked around with my aunt, "Anyang, you are not very busy at ordinary times, are you?"

"Well, my time is more flexible. If I have work, I will go out and stay at home if I don't."

"The last time you went home with Sen Miao, I remember Sen Miao saying that you have a stable job."

"Oh, I quit, I think it's better for me to do this."

"Then how about your salary?"

"There is no fixed salary, and the more you run, the more you earn. If you don't work, you don't get paid, but Auntie, don't worry, I won't spend Sen Miao's money. My own salary can support me."

"Auntie doesn't mean that, don't worry too much, our family, Sen Miao, doesn't know what happened in recent years, as a mother, I can't see through it. When the child grows up, he has his own plan. You can live on your own." It's good to be comfortable."

The aunt said that as long as Sen Miao felt happy, she would not be involved in the child's feelings. I followed the aunt to buy vegetables and fruits. After returning home, the aunt said that she was in charge of the spoon today. When washing the vegetables, she told me about Sen Miao's childhood.She said that when Sen Miao was in kindergarten, many teachers liked her. She said that every time she took Sen Miao out, everyone asked if the child was learning to dance. She was so beautiful, with big eyes rolling around.

"Later, as I grew older, I didn't look as good as when I was a child. I staggered."

"Mom, I'm back."

"Mom, I heard you talking about me when I was outside. Why are you talking bad about me?"

"I told Anyang that you were so good-looking when you were young, but it's a pity that you grew ugly later."

"Mom, do you ever say that about your daughter? Anyang, I'll let you go out to accompany my dad."

"okay."

Sen Miao asked me to go out to chat with my uncle, so I washed my hands and left the kitchen. In the living room, my uncle was watching the military channel. I walked over and sat down by the sofa to pour tea for him.Uncle's mouth is China's strength, and I listened to it. After the meal was ready, we gathered around the dining table. Sen Miao raised his glass and said, "Parents, don't worry about me. You can also go out to play in the future. Don't worry about the money." Not willing to spend."

"Our daughter is caring, so Dad will go with you."

Sen Miao drank some white wine with her uncle, so she was a little bit drunk. After I cleaned up the dishes, I sat with my aunt in the living room for a while before returning to the bedroom. Sen Miao leaned against the bed to rest, and I reached out to her Unbuttoning the shirt, Sen Miao suddenly raised his hand to hold my wrist when the buttons were halfway unbuttoned.

"What's wrong"

"You touched those things"

"I tidied it up. I dropped some of them when I was putting them on the closet. The shells of a few CDs were broken. I'll put them for you..."

"I saw it, and the CD was scratched."

"I'm buying new ones for you. I'll go out tomorrow."

"This is her favorite song, and it's no longer available, it's no longer available."

"Sen Miao"

"I take off myself don't touch me"

The hand I put on her arm was thrown away by her, and she touched one of the records over and over again, with stars and tears in the corners of her eyes. It was not until that moment that I understood why she occasionally sighed when she was with me. She and I What is the reason for the crying after the first sex, but I just want to say sadly, it's a pity it's not you.

Sen Miao took a nightgown and went to take a shower. I sat by the bed and looked at the record that I accidentally broke on the bedside table. I picked up my mobile phone and took a picture of it, then pressed against the most painful stomach Fell on the side of the bed.The process of being reborn is arduous and painful. It is not just a layer of skin being forcibly pulled out, but even bone remodeling.I can understand her being uncontrollable at certain moments, I can understand her distress and helplessness when she can't get what she wants, and I even understand why she chose me in the vast crowd.Her disengagement, her absent-mindedness, and her flatness after a brief passion are all because I am not her, and I am just her substitute, Ke Feng's reflection in Sen Miao's heart.

"washed"

"I drank a little too much at night. I didn't mean to kill you just now."

"I know, it's just Sen Miao, don't think about the past anymore, you still have your own life."

"I know"

"If you think we are not suitable, you can say break up, and I will leave."

"Anyang, I'm sorry."

"It's okay, I'm not me in your eyes anyway."

"You are not you, then who are you."

"You see I am who I am, I can be anyone or anything."

"Things" I don't even need to be a person, Sen Miao, if you think I'm a cup, then I'm the water cup that you can use to relieve your anger when you are angry.If you think I am air, then I can become illusory dust. It doesn't matter who I am, what matters is who Sen Miao you think I am.

I searched for the record that was broken by me for a long time. I knew it was about the memories between them, but I still searched everywhere. Mo Han said it was just an old record, but I couldn’t find it. What is the meaning, I think it is meaningless to me, but it must be of great significance to her.