[HP] Can you be gentle with me

"What are you doing in my office, Professor Snape?"

Snape's fingers had already touched the end of the wand, but he stopped all his movements uncontrollably the moment he heard these words, he couldn't speak, he couldn't turn around, he just stood stiffly in the same position in place.

"Answer me." came another sentence from behind.

For a while, the whole office was filled with a strange sense of oppression, and even some of the portraits on the wall were disturbed from their dreams. They secretly opened one eye and continued to pretend to be asleep, for fear of causing the office to be disturbed. Master's attention.

"...Trust me, Tahlia." After a while, Snape took a deep breath before speaking slowly. "I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for your permission."

"What—" Tahlia's voice seemed to freeze in surprise. "I do not believe."

Snape couldn't hold it back for a moment, and laughed out loud at an imperceptible level, before continuing. "I'm not surprised."

Another moment of silence.

After a long time, Tahlia spoke again in the cold tone just now. "What... are you thinking about?"

Snape froze for a moment, then blurted out reflexively. "No." Then I remembered that even though I wanted to get along well with Tahlia, I still couldn't control my temper. Tahlia chose to lower her figure a long time ago, but she was strong enough at this time.

Under the strong collision of the two parties, a conflict can be said to be the inevitable result, and how long it took Snape to realize that it is not so important, what is important is that he hates himself for treating Tahlia in the past, and now At this moment, even asking him to pretend to do it made him sick to his stomach.

He didn't even have the courage to turn around, and he didn't need to confirm with his own eyes to know the expression on Tahlia's face at the moment──Indifference.

"I have to apologize to you," Snape said, closing his eyes.

The woman behind her obviously paused for a moment before speaking. "for what?"

"For what I'm about to do──" Snape replied, then quickly grasped the wand that was already on his fingertips, turned around sharply, and shot out with a red light, which was obvious when it sank because it was too sudden After being caught in the chest of the unsuspecting woman who hadn't reacted at all, Snape strode forward and hugged the woman who was about to collapse on the ground. "I'm very sorry."

However, it is impossible for the person whose eyes are closed again not to be deaf.

It seems that he has done too many inappropriate things today, Snape looked down at Tahlia who fell asleep in his arms again, maybe he talked too much, making that kind of potion was not good for Tahlia Any help, but instead provoked such things.

Snape sighed heavily, carried Tahlia to the sofa and let her lie on it again, then sat on the side himself.

He didn't know to what extent Tahlia's memory would recover when she woke up again, but in any case, he had to prepare first.

At least he had to recall Tahlia's emotions during this period, and it wouldn't cause him to be unable to react for a while after she woke up again. He needed some time to sort out some thoughts.

That's right... Besides, he has a strong premonition that Tahlia will open his eyes soon.

And Tahlia was exactly as Snape expected, less than half an hour later there was movement again, and the first thing she said after opening her eyes and sitting up slowly, I have to say, made Snape heave a sigh of relief.

"Failed... right?"

Snape didn't answer.

It should be said that he is not good at handling this kind of situation. At this time, he should say something to comfort the other party, but this has always been an area he will not set foot in.

She couldn't wait for Snape's answer, and Tahlia didn't rush to say anything else, in fact, she was dizzy now, and she felt an indescribable melancholy, as if her heart was empty, as if suddenly she had no purpose.

Everything seems to be back to the original point.Why did she come back here?Now that she decided to leave, why did she come back?

In order not to feel so bad again, in order not to feel regret again... in order to forget.But now she hasn't changed anything, the potion has just failed. After all, she is still not as determined as she imagined. If she had just given the ring at the beginning──

If she couldn't make up her mind, even if Merlin made the potion herself, it would still only lead to the same result.

Should she continue to escape from all this?Continuing with this unreasonable ambivalence of her own...continuing to pretend that she is still unmoved──

"Failure..." Tahlia murmured unconsciously. "It's always like this—"

"Tahlia—"

"Am I wrong?" Tahlia raised her head sharply, facing the direction of the voice. "From before to now, the final result has always failed to meet my initial expectations..."

That's right, it's always been that way.

She had hoped to get along with Snape before, but had failed.Then she tried to keep him away from Voldemort, which also failed.He wanted to protect Lily and James, but it ended in tragedy──and then?

And then she expected a normal life, and she hadn't had a single day in her life--even when she and Derek were in that small town, she still had her concerns, or worries--

And then, she wanted to live like this. Even if the days were not perfect, she no longer wanted to let herself pursue those dreams that she could never achieve in her life. Dreams were just dreams after all, and she couldn't always be immersed in those illusory things. In the end, Derek leaves.

But now, she hopes to let go, to forget the unhappiness and pain in the past, and after going around a big circle, she finds that she is still back to the original point, and nothing...has changed.

"Do not."

Do not?

Tahlia looked up blankly. What did Snape say?

"you are wrong."

"...was I wrong?" Tahlia repeated in a low voice, then spoke again at a slightly higher volume. "I was wrong?"

"You've done a lot of things we've never been able to do in our lifetimes," Snape said softly. "You fend off the Dark Lord."

For some reason, Tahlia laughed out loud the moment she heard this, as if she really found what Snape said very interesting. "You're right, Severus—I did help a little bit with Voldemort, but I think you've completely misunderstood my question—"

"I know what you want to say." Sanpe's tone remained flat. "You want to say that's not what you expected, but that's the truth?"

Tahlia froze for a few seconds. "……What's the meaning?"

Snape didn't speak right away, but moved to sit on the sofa as well after a moment's pause, next to Tahlia. "Is it possible that you don't have any expectations for this in your heart?"

Tahlia sat stiffly, not speaking.

"It seems to me that your expectations were never high, and it was our fault—" Snape didn't deliberately lower his voice, but for some unknown reason, his voice sounded different in Tahlia's ears now. Unexpectedly, it touched her heart inexplicably, maybe because of his changes these days, or maybe because of the sincerity in his tone that she couldn't pretend not to notice.It should be said that she noticed it a long time ago, but she selectively ignored it. "Even if I never cared about anyone, I shouldn't ignore a person's kindness without any purpose at will, or even take it for granted."

"……You do not understand."

"Don't understand?" Snape repeated, straightening himself up, returning his gaze to Tahlia's stiff face. "You think I don't understand?" He chuckled. "reason?"

Tahlia frowned. "I don't think I need to explain anything to you?"

"It's not necessary." Snape raised one corner of his mouth. "Why don't you let me tell?"

"What?" Tahlia scowled. "You're still going to pretend you know me well—"

"Oh, Tahlia, I wouldn't say that—" Snape said with a smile. "But I do understand what's going on in your mind right now." He paused for a moment, waiting for Tahlia's reaction.

"Really?" The corners of Tahlia's mouth turned up slightly. "Then tell me, what am I thinking about now?"

"I remember you saying that we should be thankful that the Dark Lord threatened someone you cared about, which put you on the opposite side of him, and am I right?" Snape said flatly.

Tahlia listened to Snape's question with a blank expression, then nodded very slowly.

"You also said that the Dark Lord's failure was not what you expected, so what exactly was your expectation?" Snape paused for a few seconds. "Expect the people you care about to be safe so he must be defeated, or expect him to be defeated so the people you care about are safe?"

"What are you talking about?" Tahlia frowned. "They mean exactly the same thing—"

"Yes, same meaning." Snape interrupted Tahlia. "They mean the same thing, Tahlia, and I think that's enough to clear up your earlier doubts."

Tahlia fell silent again.

She had to admit that Snape was very good at word games, and even better at making people unconsciously refute what she said earlier... When she found out, the words had already been spoken, when did she become so easy in front of Snape again? Fall into the trap of his words.

"...Assuming you're right, but that's the only thing, there's nothing to be proud of──"

Then Tahlia shut her mouth and glared in Snape's direction, who suddenly snorted. "I don't know what's so funny about that, Severus."

"Nothing to be proud of?" Snape said with a strong smile. "Tahlia, that's a very humble statement of yours, even for all members of the Order." He paused for a few seconds. "If defeating the most feared dark wizard of all time is something to be proud of, I can't think of anything else to be proud of."

"There are many ways to gain self-confidence, and it doesn't necessarily have to be something accomplished." Tahlia said flatly. "The truth is, I make mistakes when I'm pursuing what I really want, whether it's my own fault or something else, and whenever I think I'm about to succeed, there's always something that steps in to catch me, or It made me deviate from the original path, and the final result was never different from what I expected..."

"Then, from this moment on, I will fulfill all your expectations."

Tahlia's words stopped in an instant.

For a while, she couldn't control it, so she could only maintain the expression of opening her mouth, staring forward in a daze, without moving her body.

"It's not a joke." After a while, Snape said again slowly. "If that's what you think now—"

"No." Tahlia spit out, and her face returned to normal after the surprise flashed just now. "I just..." She tilted her head slightly. "A little surprised...just."

Snape raised one eyebrow. "Because this doesn't seem like something that would come out of my mouth?" He paused for a while, saw the woman sitting beside him nodded slightly after being stunned for a moment, and then continued. "But you believe."

There was a sudden brief silence.

Tahlia opened and closed her mouth a few times, then, slowly lowering her head, said in a low voice. "Would I not believe it? I've already──I've personally experienced everything you've experienced, and I know how you've changed since then. No matter what, I should believe it. I should... try to step out──"

"But something's stopping you."

"Stop—" Tahlia raised her head sharply, her eyes staring straight ahead. "Stop me? Well... that's not stopping, Severus... I'm just protecting myself!"

"While you are uttering such words, the wound you claim to protect will never heal for the rest of your life."

"It's better than going through that pain again after opening it—"

"I will be with you."

Tahlia shut her mouth again, not just because of what Snape had just said, but also because she was suddenly caught in an embrace.

Shocking but unexpectedly warm.

At that moment, Tahlia even had a feeling that nothing was important anymore. At that moment, all the things she still cared about and struggled with seemed to be thrown into something she would never touch again. For some unknown reason, Snape did almost nothing, no, it should be said that he did, he did a lot in the past few years, and now such a silent hug seemed to be the last water that broke her defenses , even if he didn't answer immediately, she still clearly felt the other person's thoughts from the body temperature transmitted.

"I love you, Tahlia." The other party's voice seemed to be magnetically transmitted to the ear. "forever."