[Comprehensive] The best assist

I closed my eyes and came to a strange place.

It's not very accurate to say that I have come, because I am sure that I was sleeping just now, but the pure white scene around here is obviously not an underground street, but more like my own room.Looking down, the body is my own body, and the fingers are still transparent.

It's strange, when you get out of the possessed body, it should be in a formless incorporeal state, and you can't find your own chest if you want to touch it, how can you still see that it is transparent?

"What are you thinking about, go sit in front of the computer."

Hearing that male voice that was too clear, I finally realized that it was an order from the system to be issued.I said why I haven't contacted me for so long and didn't complain about me, the relationship is waiting here to make things difficult for the master.

So I went to the computer in the middle of the room and turned it on.

"You've been going too far lately. I won't say anything during the day, and you won't let me sleep when I sleep at night. Do you have a problem with me?" When the computer was turned on, an English message popped up on the desktop. I couldn't understand the dialog box, so I wanted to click "OK" subconsciously, but I didn't see anything other than the monitor after searching for a long time.

"Huh? Where's the mouse? Where's the keyboard?" How can I use it naked.

"It's a good thing I didn't install it for you at the beginning, who told you to randomly order it!" The male voice just now sounded a little annoyed: "I finally got it, don't waste it for me. Put your hand where the mouse is. An infrared mouse will appear, put it on a keyboard and an infrared keyboard will appear."

I did, and it felt really advanced.

"Next, do as I said. Click the green button on the left, and then click and download all the materials in the list. Hurry up!"

"What's the rush, I'm still rushing like this in my dream..." I covered my mouth and yawned and clicked the download.Looking at the green progress bar above, I feel a little bored, calling me up at night just to download files?Is it something important, could it be... a small piece? !

"You're only watching small movies! Can you stop judging me with such dirty thinking!"

I lay down on the chair and started picking my booger: "Everyone is a man, why be shy."

……

……

I don't seem to be a man QwQ, bastard system, I can't stop talking to you!

The voice of the system was silent in my head for a few seconds: "Stop talking nonsense, there is not much time, you will take the USB flash drive to download the data later, and you can run wherever I tell you, you know."

I've heard him pretend to be funny before, but I've never heard such a serious voice from the system, which made me involuntarily serious.I glanced at the download progress on the computer, and it was only at 80.00% Jiu: "It will take a few seconds, what's the matter, why are you still running, am I dreaming now?"

"No, you're in a spirit body state, and you're in another dimension. In short, just do as I said..."

Hearing that I was in a spirit body state, I felt a sense of tension. Could it be that my soul has come out of that body now?Didn't that body turn back into a dead body again?What if Sakata Gintoki wakes up in the middle of the night and needs to pee? If he can't wake me up, he can't pee his pants?I still have to breastfeed my baby!

Before I had time to speak, this unknown space suddenly remembered a sharp and piercing siren, and the download progress reached 90.00%.

"Hurry up! Pull out the USB flash drive!" The voice of the system became anxious: "Take the USB flash drive and go down the left safety exit. Don't take the stairs, jump directly from the window!"

"What?! It's not over yet!"

"It's okay, this is an instant storage U disk, you can download as many as you want, leave quickly!"

The alarm sound became more and more urgent. I watched the progress of 90.00% on the computer and really didn't want to pull out the USB flash drive, but there was no way. Listening to this sound, I always felt like a thief.I was in a hurry to find out where the USB flash drive was. This f*cking computer doesn’t even have a host, so there’s no such thing as a USB flash drive!

"Behind the screen!"

When I found the USB flash drive, the things I was downloading were also downloaded, and I ran away—not because I listened to him too much, but because I had already heard the sound of messy footsteps.I turned into the corridor and rushed to the window regardless.Climb up the window, fuck it, so high!

"This is the 27th floor, of course it's high, jump quickly! I'm chasing you!"

"I'm afraid of heights!" I screamed and shook my head.

"Jump as long as I tell you to, I can't beat you to death!"

After he said this, I felt as if I was pushed behind me, and then I rolled over and fell from the window on the 27th floor.The earth is coming...

Al?Is this scene a bit familiar? I seem to have jumped a building in Meteor Street, and I was committing suicide with my life.

Before I had time to think about it, the rapidly approaching land occupied my entire field of vision. At the last moment, my body suddenly felt a strong suction force, my head shook, and the scene in front of me changed.

Looking at the blackness in front of me, I was a little confused, and I still felt nothing when I moved my hands—didn’t go back to the body?I walked forward in doubt, and the black mist receded, revealing a table with... I'll go, it's a computer again.

"Insert the USB drive..."

The sound of the system sounded in the void, and he sounded a little haggard.

"What's wrong with you?" After the previous incidents, I probably understand a little bit. From the initial weakness of the system to the current clear state, he seems to be in the process of recovery. Even if I don't think about it carefully, I know that I Now I am a grasshopper on the same rope with him, one prospers and one loses...cough, if I lose him, he will not lose it, and if he loses it, I will lose it.So I am still very concerned about the body of the system.

"I'm fine. It took some effort to take you away just now. You transfer the information in."

This computer is the same as the desktop computer I am used to. Turn it on and then read the USB flash drive. According to what he said, transfer all the contents into the computer.It's just that I don't know what the downloaded thing is. It can't really be a pornographic film. In order to make myself so haggard by ordering the film, the system gentleman can be regarded as a fighter in the hanging wire.

"Actually, the two-dimensional sister has a pretty good figure, why don't you open a world of meat fans to play, why do you have to work hard to make an underground AV, and bring me along."

"I said it wasn't a movie," the system interrupted me through gritted teeth: "I didn't have time to tell you before, this is the most high-end sex technology on Planet Hemur. The place we just went to is the National Security Agency. When the time comes You just give this thing to the boss here, like that Levi or something..."

"Wait, wait!" I interrupted him with a twitch of the corner of my mouth: "You mean I just entered the National Security Agency of an alien planet?"

Although under the influence of Gintama for many years, aliens seem to me to be nothing more than big earthworms that urinate on them, but once it rises to national security... and the word "bureau", I feel very tall Going up, and invading some bureau, isn't that the job of a hacker, why is it my turn!He actually asked me to copy something myself!

"Yes, what are you excited about?"

After I got the USB flash drive into the computer, the system appeared next to me in the image of a uniformed military officer, but he looked a little more transparent than last time.

"Then didn't I do the same thing as a spy?! Why don't you find a hacker for this kind of thing!" I hugged my head and wailed.

The system frowned impatiently and glanced at me: "Hacker? Can you do it? You are a scum who can't even pass the second-level computer certificate."

"...OTL can let others go too."

"What someone else got is someone else's. I spent a lot of energy to help you complete the task, so stop yelling at me!" He waved his hand: "Do you still want your arms and legs? , If you want to, hurry up and give this information to Levi or other reliable people, I will help you translate it into the common language here tonight, and you can find a way for me when you go back."

"...You think Levi is a salesperson, anyone who wants to talk to him can talk to him, why don't you let me time travel to become a distant relative of Levi's sister's adopted daughter cousin, or the leader's younger sister's adopted daughter cousin's distant relative, In this way, I can still prostitute him easily. Let me dress up as a man... I am still so tall, even if I want to take the BL color-seduction route, the slender Captain Levi will definitely not be willing to make friends with me." While opening the files transferred from the computer, I was thinking about them, and I was dumbfounded when I saw the files.

"What do I rely on! It's so dense that I can't understand it! They asked me how to do the manufacturing process. Although I can make some simple equipment, I can't make an atomic bomb! Ask me where the materials come from and what to do! Make up a reason first!"

You say let others make an atomic bomb, so make an atomic bomb. Although I know that the atomic bomb is really powerful, you don’t need a single soldier to kill a group of big zombies. Don’t say that if you can’t cut off the back of the neck, you can be resurrected continuously, connecting the neck, head and limbs The bodies were all blown up to ashes. Seeing that they were still alive, the nape of their necks would be gone.

But is the level of technology in this era enough, is the ore enough...

"I told you to figure out your own way!" The system yelled at me unbearably: "You go! Don't make me angry here!"

After he finished speaking, I felt a pull like a toilet bowl pulling me away.

Fuck, I told you not to use such a simple and rude method!

"By the way, give me some merit! Sakata Gintoki needs to drink milk—"