My cat has become a sperm

The advantage of few relatives, or even no relatives, is that you don’t have to visit relatives and friends tiredly during the Chinese New Year, and you don’t have to accept the torture from the soul of relatives. Qian left after eating, and Xu Miao was still sleeping soundly under the blanket until Yan Shuo woke up.

Yan Shuo didn't know if it was because he had consumed too much last night. After he finished washing, Mengmeng was still sleeping unconsciously, but seeing that his breathing was stable and normal, he carefully closed the door and let him continue to sleep.During this sleep, Xu Miao didn't wake up until late at night, and was still awakened by the smell of food.

Seeing Mengmeng who was swaying downstairs and wishing to roll down, Yan Shuo stepped forward and hugged him down: "Are you so tired? Or does spit out the demon pill affect you a lot?"

Before Xu Miao opened her mouth, Mei Er, who was sitting on the sofa waiting to eat, said, "It is fatal for a monster to leave the demon pill, and if there is a slight mistake in this process, it will end in a frenzy, and as long as the demon pill leaves the body, the demon's The cultivation base will continue to overflow, and the cultivation base will be consumed rapidly every second, not to mention that he will separate his own demon power and infuse it into your body, which will not be recovered in a year or so. "

Yan Shuo frowned instantly when he heard the words: "Mengmeng, why didn't you tell me when it was so serious, or do you think I would be happy to see you like this?"

Xu Miao looked at Yan Shuo and blinked. He didn't understand why Yan Shuo was suddenly angry. His big cat eyes were full of confusion: "Shuo Shuo? Why are you angry?"

Yan Shuo took a deep breath and tried to reason with him in a calm tone: "Because you didn't take good care of yourself, if you saw that I was sick, would you feel anxious and uncomfortable?"

Xu Miao thought for a while and nodded, this will definitely happen, but...: "You drank snake blood, ate snake meat every day, and I even combed your body with the demon pill yesterday, so don't worry, Shuoshuo. , you will definitely not be sick."

Yan Shuo helped his forehead helplessly: "Mengmeng, let's make an agreement, shall we?"

Xu Miao tilted her head: "What agreement?"

Yan Shuo said: "For you, I will take good care of myself and protect myself. Then you must take good care of yourself for me. Dangerous actions like taking out the demon pill are not allowed in the future, even if you are doing it for my own good. Put yourself first in everything you do, okay?"

Xu Miao shook her head quickly: "No, I want to put you first."

Yan Shuo looked at him for a while, then hugged him in his arms and took a deep breath: "Mengmeng, I must have saved the entire universe in my previous life, otherwise how could I have met such a wonderful you."

Xu Miao spread her belly to let him suck, and smiled and said, "I also met a very good Shuoshuo."

Xu Meier glanced at them coldly, forcing a fox to eat dog food, conscience.

Yan Shuo thought that what Xu Meier said about recovering within a year and a half meant that Mengmeng would be in such a weak state of being unable to wake up every day, but after dinner, Mengmeng immediately revived with full blood, and dragged Xu Meier and the rabbit who was far downstairs The rabbit opened a room to fight the landlord, and the sound of plane bombs filled the living room. In the end, Mengmeng lost no Happy Beans. Yan Shuo gave him 1000 yuan, but Xu Meier used the conniving eyes of a teenager with Internet addiction I watched it for a long time.

The three monsters gather|crowd|gamble|gamble late into the night every day, Yan Shuo thinks about the Chinese New Year, Mengmeng wants to play, let him have fun, and the process of playing is also learning, at least Mengmeng can understand the cards now Face to face, will calculate.It was not until the seventh day that Yan Shuo stopped pampering him, because it was time for class.

Xu Miao heard that Yan Shuo had found two teachers with him, one to teach him how to read and write, and the other to teach him to speak and write in English. At first, he was full of expectations, but when the class really started, he was there every minute. Experience the rage of the scumbags.

What Yan Shuo was looking for was a one-way video. Mengmeng could watch the video to learn, but he couldn’t see it from the other side, but he could hear the sound. Yan Shuo even bought a writing board for him. Mengmeng’s cat The paws can write on it.Yan Shuo thought that with his cute and playful nature, he would not be able to last long, but he threw himself into his arms and cried loudly on the first day, which still made Yan Shuo dumbfounded.

Touching the disfigured hair that was ravaged by Mengmeng himself, Yan Shuo said: "This is what you asked for. It's only the first day, why did you retreat?"

Xu Miao cried and said: "It's too difficult, why are your human courses so difficult, there are one and four pronunciations, my tongue is about to tie up, and why English is the same as Pinyin, I can't tell They're gone!"

Yan Shuo comforted: "This is just the beginning, it is the simplest foundation. Didn't you say that you have learned about human beings in the Demon League before? Isn't that difficult?"

Xu Miao raised her wet face and looked at Yan Shuo: "But we didn't learn pinyin and English, we only learned numbers and some simple Chinese characters, and that's been a long time."

Yan Shuo picked up the children's books on the side and opened them: "Come on, let's learn slowly, a little bit a day, and we will accumulate a lot in the future."

When Xu Miao was struggling in the sea of ​​learning, Xu Tutu was brought back to the hometown by Zhang Kai, his shit-shoveling officer. Xu Tutu didn't like to travel far, and he couldn't run around like a dog. The rabbit hopped and ran. It's very tiring, not to mention that the seventh day of the lunar new year is over, why go back to the hometown, you can go back by yourself, he can order takeaway at home every day, why bring him to people for viewing, Xu Tutu Zhang Kai didn't give Zhang Kai a good look along the way.

Zhang Kai smiled and kneaded his ears: "I don't want to miss you. I may have to stay for a few days when I go back this time. If we don't see each other for a few days, don't you miss me?"

Xu Tutu flicked his ears, and hummed, "No way!"

Zhang Kai's face was full of regret: "Tsk, I'm so reluctant to part with you, hey, sad."

Xu Tutu hummed: "That's what it should be, I'm your master, you should always think about me."

Zhang Kai nodded with a smile: "Yes, my rabbit master."

Zhang Kai went back to his mother’s hometown. His father died of a sudden illness when he was very young. At that time, the family was a little unhappy about the distribution of the old house. In the city, many old houses are facing demolition. My father’s main house has an area of ​​more than 500 square meters. There are two floors above and below. There are eight or nine rooms. It is a large courtyard, and the whole family lives together.

Although his grandfather said that he was partial to the smallest one, he was not too partial. He agreed that the house would be divided equally among the families in the future, but the smallest house, that is, his uncle, would be given the largest house. It was still peaceful.After his grandfather fell and left when he was old, the relationship between the brothers began to become less pleasant.Later, his father also passed away, leaving his uncle, third uncle and younger uncle to start thinking about it.

The excuse was that he was too young at the time, and his mother could remarry at any time. She was an outsider, and said that the money from the demolition and the house allotment would be kept by several uncles for him, and would be given to him when he got married in the future.Even the house that hadn't been demolished at that time wanted to go back, saying that there was only two of them, there was no need to live in such a big room, and they could change it to a smaller one, and the big room could still be rented out.

Even Zhang Kai was not very sensible at that time, but he still felt that his face was ugly. His mother was so angry that she didn't want anything, and took him back to her natal home. He changed everything.

Xu Tutu didn't know that Zhang Kai still had such a past, and he was bored on the way back, so he asked casually, and Zhang Kai talked about all the bad things back then, which made Xu Tutu stunned: "How can you human beings be so shameless? How can you go back on your promises when you say good things? The consequences of breaking your promises are very serious and you will be punished by heaven."

Zhang Kai smiled and said, "Yes, some people are just so shameless."

Xu Tutu asked: "Then what happened later? Did they divide a lot of houses and money?"

Zhang Kai smiled with a smile on his lips, and also took a bit of gloating: "The division is divided, but the demolition in that era was not like now. Once demolished, you will get rich. You just repay the house according to the original area. The three of them divided a house. At that time There are not many high-rise buildings. Buildings with an area of ​​more than 100 square meters can only be lived in by rich people. Naturally, they are not so rare now. They were allocated early in the past, and they were lucky to be allocated in the current city center. It can be said that they have nothing, and their children are still not high enough, so they can barely get enough food and clothing."

Xu Tutu looked Zhang Kai up and down for a long time: "Are you praising yourself in disguise?"

Zhang Kai lifted his chin proudly: "I am indeed much better than them all."

Xu Tutu rolled his eyes at him: "Cheek-skinned."

After driving for several hours, he finally returned to Zhang Kai's hometown. As soon as his car entered the village, Zhang Kai stuffed Xu Tutu into his clothes. Immediately afterwards, there were rumbling firecrackers outside. Crackling, it just exploded.Zhang Kai took Xu Tutu out of the car after a long whip was blown up, but the pungent smell and smoke lingered after the explosion, almost suffocating Xu Tutu to death in Zhang Kai's arms.

Zhang Kai’s hometown is not a very poor place, but it’s not very rich either. It’s just that the environment has improved in recent years, and every household has built small western-style buildings, neatly arranged in rows with large yards, It looks neat and comfortable at first glance.After the smoke cleared, before Xu Tutu took a good look at Zhang Kai's hometown, a group of relatives from seven aunts and eight aunts came up, and a group of little kids came over to touch him.

Xu Tutu pinched Zhang Kai severely in his clothes, he didn't want to be a toy for these little kids, dare to put him down and try!

Zhang Kai held back the sound of gasping, and held the paw of the rabbit that pinched him in his hand, while threatening the group of cubs: "My rabbit will bite, stay away, or I will bite your fingers off!" !"

A group of brats yelled at Zhang Kai in disbelief and jumped on Zhang Kai. They made a fuss for a while, until Zhang Kai sent the group of brats away with a red envelope each.Zhang Kai's mother was standing at the door, holding a handful of melon seeds in her hand, watching her son and the rabbit on his body being tossed about by the group of children, she gloated and said, "Come back when you come back, what pets do you have with you, be careful of being caught by the children!" They were slaughtered as meat rabbits and eaten."

As soon as Zhang Kai's mother finished speaking, Zhang Kai felt a pain in his chest again. He felt that his chest was probably all bruised and purple now, and it was all pinched by those two rabbit paws.