Handsome old man Jian Xiu re-employment

Chen Chaosheng didn't have a peaceful dream all night.

He had many nightmares that night, including but not limited to: Meng Xunfeng failed in plastic surgery, he wanted to peel off the skin under Chen Chaosheng's buttocks and sew it on his face. Meng Xunfeng said that Chen Chaosheng's butt looked very young .

And the dean asked Chen Chaosheng why he had to write such an ugly homework, which directly overwhelmed him.

I forgot the one in the middle. The last one is the Buddha. The Buddha said, please don’t call him to ask him how to find the straight-line distance between two points, because the Buddha does not know modern mathematics. If you want to discuss the philosophy of life and death, the Buddha said that it is ok.

The most outrageous one is that his uncle had plastic surgery and became Kawakami Fuxun Fengzi, who specializes in eating Chen Chaosheng, an unlucky old man who copied compositions on the Internet and wrote them to Li Hua.

He just copied the composition.

He didn't know a single English letter, and looking at the jumbled pair of foreign characters, Chen Chaosheng couldn't swear anything but "Go to hell".

It's hard for Bai Fushui to be able to restrain himself and use less dirty words on the Internet every day, which is also a great victory for fox-like morality.

Chen Chaosheng's composition relies on the powerful translation function of his smartphone.Mathematics is also copied, and the only one that is not copied is his Chinese argumentative essay.That topic was so uncommon, Chen Chaosheng searched for most of the night, but couldn't find it, so he had to do it himself.

So he wrote "How to fend off a sword without messing up your hair."

This is a very groundbreaking subject.Maybe it can be selected as some SCI as Siri said.Chen Chaosheng didn't expect these things extravagantly, he just hoped that the past few days would pass smoothly, and he would never speed up Yujian again.

"Chen Chaosheng, get up!"

"Chen Chaosheng, I'm going to school to study early."

"Chen Chaosheng, it's seven o'clock!"

Chen Chaosheng was so sleepy that he wanted to die.

I feel like I've never been sleepy in my life.

Like a gold miner who has been digging all night, exhausted, and just wants to find a place to rest.It was dark in front of my eyes, and my temples were still throbbing.

"Chen Chaosheng, your homeroom teacher is calling." Siri's urging became more urgent, "Get up."

"Help me solve it." Chen Chaosheng begged, "Damn it, let me sleep for another quarter of an hour."

"Otherwise some of my good morals will be destroyed, my mind will be disturbed, and I will not be able to control the power in my body."

"What will happen then?" Siri's electronic voice sounded from under his pillow, buzzing non-stop.

"It will save everyone." Chen Chaosheng huddled under the quilt, "Let's go and destroy human beings together."

"Didn't you just go to school yesterday? Why do you want to study again today?"

"Don't stay in bed, Chen Chaosheng." Siri said, "Just wait a moment. Forget it, I'll answer this call for you."

"Well, hello, it's the homeroom teacher." Siri answered the phone, "Does it mean why Chen Chaosheng hasn't come to the morning reading yet?"

"It's very late, and you're the only one who didn't come to class." A male voice was on the other side of the phone, "Everyone else has gone to school."

"I'm sorry." Siri said, "Chen Chaosheng said he was very sleepy and had already fallen asleep. No matter how you call him, he doesn't want to get up."

"Chen Chaosheng, don't be so perfunctory when I call." The other party was obviously a little angry, and his voice rose, "Are you still coming to study?"

"Oh, it's revealed."

Chen Chaosheng pressed the mute button on the phone: "Siri, please don't use my voice to ask for leave for me, bastard."

He was in a daze, and it took him a long time to press it.

"Oh, you can't use other people's electronic voices." Siri said, "There is still a difference between me and you humans, and that is the uncanny valley."

"I want to sleep." After Chen Chaosheng finished speaking, he closed his eyes.

He was sleepy.

"Why did you call?" He still hadn't closed his eyes.

"Are you going to fire me? Beg him."

"This call... will not expel you for the time being." Siri said, "Yesterday, we talked to the end, originally there was no room for maneuver, but I said that your senior brother donated a building to Sizhou No. [-] Middle School, and he said I don't want to fire you."

"Although your senior brother donated the building, it wasn't for you." Siri paused, "He just felt that he was too aggressive in his usual speech and fighting power, and wanted to cultivate the flowers of the motherland and accumulate some virtues for himself, so that he could use it in his next life. reincarnation."

"The merit is immeasurable." Chen Chaosheng's head fell on the pillow.

The sun just rose outside the window, and the sky was still that kind of chaotic blue-gray, and a few sparrows were calling listlessly, standing on the camphor tree.

Chen Chaosheng was quarreled to death.

To die this world, human beings and Zaoba should be destroyed together.

Oh, his high school student is Zaoqi.

"Destroy the human race." Chen Chaosheng muttered, "Even if the sky is going to collapse tomorrow, I'm going to sleep a lot today."

"Chen Chaosheng, the sun is drying your ass." Siri mocked, "You lazy human, you humans are such an annoying species, unlike our AI, you only need to set a time, and when the time comes, you will naturally wake up come over."

Chen Chaosheng didn't answer, just left a fluffy head on the pillow with two locks of hair sticking out.

If you listen carefully, you can even hear his even and long breathing.

"Chen Chaosheng, the sky is falling." Siri said.

"Chen Chaosheng, your brother is here to eat your stew."

"Chen Chaosheng, your uncle is here to take you for plastic surgery."

The head on the pillow slept peacefully, almost as if in a dead sleep.

"Chen Chaosheng, your sword followed others."

"what!"

Chen Chaosheng stretched out his hand from under the quilt and pressed it on the smartphone. In a frenzy, the phone rolled off the bed.

"Isn't it possible to get up?" Siri said under the bed, "Why is it motionless in the quilt like a bastard."

"Where is my sword?" Chen Chaosheng grabbed his messy hair, "Where did it go?"

"It's under your butt." Siri said, "You fell asleep while doing your homework last night, and your saliva even dripped onto your geography book, which happens to be where the Atlantic Ocean is. That piece of the Atlantic Ocean was completely submerged by your saliva."

"Well, it seems possible to say so." Siri continued, "Maybe a puddle of saliva accidentally left by a higher creature in the Atlantic knowledge of our world. It's a bit disgusting to say this, it seems that everyone wants to Tongue kiss with this higher creature."

Chen Chaosheng took out the rose from the quilt and heaved a sigh of relief.

The sky is still like this.

The sparrow was so frightened that he flew away.

"Chen Chaosheng, wake up."

Siri announced the time: "It's [-]:[-] Beijing time, and the other senior high school students are already in their morning classes."

Chen Chaosheng picked up the phone, still sleepy to death, got under the quilt, only a section of calf was exposed: "Can you treat me as dead?"

"Aren't you alive and kicking?" Siri said, "After a while, He Jianguo will be back from his morning exercise, and his wife is going home."

"He is still living here, and his bones still need to be observed. Although he can get down to the ground, he still can't walk much." Siri said, "He could have been discharged from the hospital, but his wife punched too hard, and his fracture A little serious."

"Fortunately, I don't have a wife." Chen Chaosheng huddled under the quilt, and took out the rose, "I just want to be with my baby, Jian Qingqing, for the rest of my life."

"Wake up." Siri said, "Sir, you don't want your dean to call and flirt with you."

Chen Chaosheng was lying on the bed, wrapped in a soft quilt, and could no longer hear the artificial intelligence's words.

The greatest invention of modern technology is still on the bed.

Gentle township, ecstasy field.

Falling asleep is so ecstatic.

"Look, someone is calling." Siri hung up the call, "Do you want to answer the call?

"Tell him..." Chen Chaosheng shook his head and threw himself on the pillow, "I'm sleepy."

"My mind can no longer continue to think." Chen Chaosheng said, "Why don't you just let me die. I don't want to live anymore. In this evil and ugly world, all evil in this world must die sooner."

"What did you say?" It was the dean who called, "Chen Chaosheng, do you know that our teacher called you out of kindness?"

"What are you going to do in the future? You didn't go to college, and you won't pass the exam in the technical school." The dean said, "You can't rely on Bai Fushui and Meng Xunfeng for help all your life."

"Then who will take care of me?" Chen Chaosheng suddenly felt a kind of sadness in his heart.

He was still sleepy.

People are particularly prone to hurting spring and autumn during the two time periods. One night before going to bed, I connected my earphones to Netease Cloud and listened to a few sad Cantonese love songs. Looking at the boundless night outside the window, it is inevitable to feel sad in my heart.

The other is that in the morning, I just woke up from my dream and was forced to run around in the world. It is clear that yesterday's life was very hard, but today I have to run around under the sun, busy up and down for my livelihood, I also feel hopeless.

And Chen Chaosheng is in a state of both.

Yesterday, He Jianguo had to stare at him as he did his homework, which he never knew how to do.

He felt a deep pain when he looked at the simplified characters, and regretted that he was studying in mainland China instead of Taiwan and Hong Kong, where it is said that the legendary traditional Chinese is still used.

Simplified characters.

Word puzzle game.

The most terrifying thing is English, Great Britain is really sick.

Let Chen Chaosheng learn English is sick!Genghis Khan was supposed to unify the world back then, and he even hoped that Qin Shihuang would be resurrected to unify the language, measurement and writing of the world.

The scariest thing is English homework.

Oral English.

This is outrageous.

Chen Chaosheng studied English all night last night and read it in pinyin. He felt that when he shouted the sword formula in the future, it should be like this:

"go!"

"omg, look at Merlin's beard, your sword skills are really worse than the smelly socks at Peter's house next door!"

At the end of writing, Chen Chaosheng had a feeling of separation from body and soul.

It is clear that the hands will still move.

It took him a lot of effort to adjust from the posture of holding the brush, and then he learned to use the 0.5 gel pen to write a bunch of nonsense words.

The author says:

Chen Chaosheng: I really don’t want to study if I’m going to die

Zhaosheng, cherish your offline classes, maybe when the school will be closed and become an online class

[Late double update]