revenge in the name of love

People say that loneliness is a great fire from the sky, destroying people's glamorous cities and turning them into ruins and depressions. Even if there are thousands of glass seas, they will be burned to half a handful of ashes in a moment.I'm stuck in a dark past, a dark time I can't escape.However, in the dark place engulfed in the depths of the heart, in such a dirty place, there is an unbelievable light.

I don't remember when I had so much affection for him, so much greed; I just remember that I liked to see the cream on the corner of his mouth when he ate cake; I just remembered that I liked to hold him from behind and watch The undisguised surprise in his eyes; I just remember that I like to see the arc of his smile, but...he doesn't want to smile for me; I just remember that I like to hug him when I sleep and smell the fragrance of his hair .

Every time I want to make him laugh, but there are always some irrelevant people or things that destroy the delicate relationship between us step by step.I thought that if he doesn't love me anymore, at least I can hold him in the name of brother.However, even this relationship is now in shambles.But Xun'er!Now even if you know that we are not brothers, I will not let you go. There are people in heaven who hate me, and people in hell who miss me.

The sun shone slightly, but I woke up just as early as morning.Looking at the sleeping little man in my arms, I slightly raised the corners of my mouth and hugged him even tighter.Put your chin on the top of Xun'er's head, and immediately smell his innate fragrance, so special, so fascinating!

"Woo..." The person in his arms twisted his body uncomfortably, his brows were deeply furrowed, "Don't do this..."

What's wrong?Wasn't it good just now?Have a nightmare?

"Let go... let go..." He grabbed his collar tightly.

"Xun'er." I tried to wake him up.

"Let me go! Let me go!" His tears slipped from his slender eyelashes, slid over his tall nose, and fell on his other half's cheeks, "Feng Yuqing! Let me go!"

"..." The hand that was about to wipe his tears froze.What did he say?What did he say in the dream?

"Let me go……"

He wanted to escape so much, he even wanted to escape in his dreams!He even dreamed of leaving me!Why?Feng Yixun!Why!You just want to escape from the space where I exist, you just want to... avoid me.

"Don't!" He shook his head, his jet-black hair clung to his fair cheeks, and the bangs on his forehead were wet with sweat.

"Xun'er!" Calling his name, or her name mercilessly.

"Ah!" His eyes finally opened, and his eyes were full of horror.

"What did you dream about just now?" I said coldly.

"No... nothing..." His eyes flickered, his body curled up like a giant shrimp.

"What did you dream about just now!" It's not a question, I don't have the patience to treat him anymore, I don't have the patience anymore!He is leaving me!What patience is needed to treat him!I have been with him for 15 years!He still can't keep him!I can't even keep his person, his heart!

"..." He buried his head in the bed, I couldn't see his expression, nor could I read his heart.

"You want to leave me?" I pulled him out of the bed, raised his chin lightly, and asked fiercely, "Do you?"

"Yes!" With the courage he didn't know, he looked straight into my eyes, with a tenacity in his firmness.

"You don't want to leave me!" I approached his small ear and whispered softly in his ear, "Unless you die!"

"..." Looking at his solemn expression, I couldn't help frowning.

"I will leave you!" He suddenly moved very close to me, "Definitely!"

"I want to see what method you, Feng Yixun, will use." I narrowed my eyes, "die in front of me!"

"It's not that I haven't tried it!" He patted my face symbolically, "Master Feng, have you forgotten?"

I froze for a moment, thinking of the bloody Feng Yixun lying in my arms not long ago, I couldn't help feeling cold.He can indeed do some things that amazed me, such as: committing suicide...

"Hmph!" I sneered, "This time, I, no, believe it." I said it word by word, emphasizing the last three words.

He got out of bed slowly, put on his slippers, opened the huge French windows, stood on the balcony, turned around and looked at me provocatively.

The smile in my eyes gradually cooled down with every movement of his.

He looked at my expression, and his smile deepened. He simply opened his hands and tilted his head slightly upwards, enjoying the first ray of sunlight in the morning.

I walked quickly to the balcony and said coldly: "What do you want to do?" I admit that I panicked, this is the third floor, if he falls...

"..." His eyes darkened, "Are we brothers or not!"

"Yes!"

"Tell the truth!" He gritted his teeth, "Feng Yuqing, I want you to tell the truth!"

"I'm telling the truth." I felt a little guilty, but I still spoke the whole sentence calmly.

"Feng Yuqing!" He bit his lip, and was about to lean outward.

I grabbed his wrist and stretched it hard, Xun'er was already light, and after a night of fierce fighting, his body didn't have much strength in the first place.

"Let go of me!" Without any explanation, he bit my arm.

"Woo..." The pain on the arm actually spread to the heart, even the apex of the heart hurts, it hurts terribly.

This feeling... It's exactly the same when I saw her being raped by that old man, and when I heard the news of her death.

It hurts, it hurts!It's the kind of wound that has just grown a callus, slowly peeling it off bit by bit, and then patching it up, watching the blood gushing from the old wound and the new one, so coquettish and desolate.Maybe only the most painful will be the most nostalgic, and the most hurt will be the most lingering.

He was biting, and I felt the strength in that hand getting heavier, and I pinched his white, slender neck with the other hand.

"Don't you want to die?" I shook off his biting hand, covered my other hand, and increased the strength, "I'll satisfy you!"

"Feng... Yuqing..." My blood stuck to the corner of his upturned mouth, "If you have the ability... just... kill me..."

"Hmph," I let go of him and watched him slide slowly to the ground against the snow-white wall, "That's not cheap for you!"

I turned around and was about to leave when there was a sudden gasp from behind: "Feng...Feng Yuqing."

"what?"

"Tell me, are we brothers or not?"

"So what if it is, so what if it's not?" I didn't look back at him, staring at the stain on the bed from last night's mess.

"What's your plan for sneaking into Feng's house?" He barely propped himself up and stood up slowly.

"Attempt?" I turned around, thinking of her and my mother, and fell silent.

People always carry some things from their growing years to the future. Those memories are what we will try to find and possess for the rest of our lives.

I often like to close my eyes, as if everything has nothing to do with me, or take the time of memory to wander far away, mottled in the clear and swaying posture, to see the wind and clouds alone, to enjoy the spring flowers and autumn moon, just to be in Feel the most silent soul in the depths of your heart, or wait indefinitely in the long years. ——Feng Yuqing