Daozun and I turned the enemy into gay[Jian San]

The pressure of the dissertation is brutal enough.

However, the busy tone of 120 came from the microphone and kept on chasing, almost becoming the last straw that crushed Shu Yao.

Fortunately, Mozun has seen the world, experienced ups and downs, and tidied up his mentality. Shu Yao calmly kicked these two straws away:

"Erji, listen to me, I think my sanity is very clear."

Tiance had lingering fears: "Axiu, I don't know if you are sane or not, but your operation is not sober."

Shu Yao: "..."

He pretended nothing happened: "It's just Erji, you have to be considerate of the poor hearts of contemporary college students who have been devastated by papers. Who can't have a dream?"

Zang Jian feels the same way.

Who is not also a college student?

Who has not been oppressed by papers and lost half of their lives?

So Tibetan Jian also put down his dialing hand.

He was very sad and sighed: "It's not."

"Axiu, let me tell you, I was reading fortunes and fortune-telling in the temple two days ago. I haven't asked anything yet, but the Taoist priest is frowning. How come the psychological pressure of the young people I have seen recently is getting heavier and heavier. Marriage problems One is more worrying than the other."

Zang Jian sighed for a long while, and then came to a conclusion: "The young people who are overwhelmed are miserable."

His words gave Shu Yao a new way of thinking.

Fortune-telling, fortune-telling, pretending to be a ghost, he can also do it.

Since a society ruled by law doesn’t want to be used as sand sculpture news material to go to the whole country vigorously, then by calculating the life trajectory of the first half of the professor’s life and the fate of the second half of his life, can he successfully convince the professor with his Mahayana cultivation and accurate judgment? ?

Then maybe you can escape the fear of being ruled by papers.

Tiance over there was still thinking like a big brother: "No, Axiu, Erji and I should come over to see you. It just so happens that our winter vacation ends later than yours, so we come to you for two days just to go back to class. "

Shu Yao subconsciously evaded a few words.

"No inconvenience."

Cang Jian also said: "Didn't Gouzi and I just go on a trip and spend time with you in the hotel? Did you forget what I told you two days ago?"

"Yeah, I forgot."

Shu Yao leaned back, leaned on the back of the chair, and said casually, "How clearly do you expect me to remember what happened 300 years ago?"

There were two more bursts of laughter from the microphone.

Tiance: "Return to what happened 300 years ago. I told you clearly three days ago."

Zang Jian was more thoughtful, and snorted: "Why do I feel that you don't want us to see you, Axiu?"

Should not be ah.

The three of them have been relatives and friends for several years, and their friendship has never stopped in the game.

Shu Yao looked into the mirror and said, "I'm afraid you haven't seen me in 300 years. My appearance has changed drastically. It's too good-looking. It's not good for your eyes."

This time even Zang Jian was out of breath from laughing, and he took a long while to recover.

Shu Yao: "..."

It's the truth.

What can he do?

He couldn't grab his phone to take a selfie and send it to Cang Jian to prove himself that he was optimistic about your father, I am handsome and crack the sky.

He may be eagerly asked by Cang Jian whose picture he stole, which Meitu software filter he used, and when he secretly learned PS.

Shu Yao suddenly had an inspiration.

Yes, Hyundai has PS technology.

And his 300 years of Mahayana practice is not for the sake of looking good and talking loudly.

Disguise illusion, at least no one in this society can see through it.

Finally, I don't have to worry about racking my brains. I tried my best to explain to the professor which plastic surgery salon I went to and how I could recover so perfectly in just one month.

Shu Yao grabbed the phone!

There is no other reason, he is used to his very impactful and domineering appearance, once he catches the eye, he can't tolerate other looks, and he takes it for granted that he was born with this appearance——

For a while, Jiang Su asked his upper body, and couldn't remember what he looked like in modern times.

Shu Yao flipped through the phone album.

No.

He looked through the circle of friends in disbelief.

No.

He got up and left the chair, and opened a few drawers under the desk where there were photo albums.

Shu Yao held up the only hand in the high school graduation photo, trembling slightly.

It is true that true beauty is not afraid of the test of graduation photos.

It is true that Shu Yao was also very beautiful in the graduation photo, with picturesque features.

However, based on the degree of distortion in this graduation photo, if it is really changed according to the above-

Shu Yao was afraid that the professor would not recognize him tomorrow.

Before thinking about which plastic surgery hospital to use as an excuse, he did not give up and made a final struggle.

He poked Tiance Zangjian: "When I was in front of Ji, I remember we took a group photo, do you still have my photo?"

"Why do you want this all of a sudden?"

Tiance didn't think too much, and readily sent him the photo.

Shu Yao clicked on the picture and fell into deep thought again.

Look at the three people who are almost in a mess.

Look at the face where you can only tell where the eyes are and where the nose is.

Tiance is really...

Straight men take pictures, right? ? ?

On the first day Shu Yao came to modern times, he was autistic.

Autism belongs to autism, so what should be done still needs to be done.

Using his appearance as a template, he summed up from the only graduation photo, the photo of Tiance's straight boy, and the few remaining impressions, and finally managed to change himself into an appearance similar to his memory.

As for the hair—

Shu Yao put down the scissors.

Based on the countless lessons of blood and tears and pictures of sand sculptures that were searched and edited on the Internet, he felt that it would be better for him not to just blindly grab Teacher Tony's job.

On the second day, Shu Yao went to school fully armed with a hat and mask.

I was almost suffocated on the subway in the morning rush hour.

if not…

If it wasn't for the legal provisions that explicitly prohibit parabolic objects, Yu Jian should be the same. As a good young man who abides by the law, he is the successor of the five stresses and four beauties...

Shu Yao hates it.

I hate myself for wasting time and not passing the driver's license test.

Is it too late to hold the coach's neck now?

Living in modern times is really hard.

"Shu Yao."

The old professor on the stage slowly remembered Shu Yao's name.

Shu Yao also replied leisurely: "Yes."

This is the core course of their major, taught in small classes, and the class changes every school year.

After getting along with each other last semester, the professor has already had a good idea of ​​the students, and he can more or less remember what they look like.

At this time, he looked at Shu Yao's eyes sharply through the reading glasses, and asked the question to the point:

"The indoor air conditioner is turned on. What kind of hat and mask do you wear? Are you calling the roll call for him?"

The surrounding students were silent.

To be honest, they felt the same way.

After all, when Shu Yao opened his mouth just now, he only spat out a word miserly.

But the clarity of the voice and the beauty of the rhythm are indescribable.

It turns out that there is really a sound that can be described as pearls and jade colliding and circling the beam for three days.

Of course, students don't think so much in their minds.

Most of them were in admiration, and half were sympathetic, thinking that Shu Yao and the old man who came to take over as a substitute were strong enough to dare to let him out with such a discerning voice.

Shu Yao: "I..."

The professor said sternly: "I saw that you are covering up, the hat covers half of your face, the mask covers half of your face, and you can hardly see a pair of eyes, so I know it's not appropriate."

"Don't tell me that it's cold today. Look at the shirt and the hat you're wearing, don't you think it's against the law?"

Shu Yao: "..."

He does have a guilty conscience.

It's really hard to take off the mask.

Because Shu Yao himself is really not sure how much difference there is between his face in his impression and his face in reality, and how many layers of beauty filters he has put on.

He could only push the blame: "I have a cold, and I'm afraid of infecting everyone, it's not good."

The professor knew exactly how many students skipped classes.

In most cases, they turn a blind eye and close one eye, and the criticism passes without pain or itching.

It's a pity that Shu Yao's luck is not very good.

His class this morning is the core class of his major.

Naturally, the professor is also very strict. The old man's stubborn temper is well-known in the department, and no slick and thorny student dares to confront him.

The professor didn't believe his nonsense, raised his eyebrows and said with a sneer, "I heard your voice clear and clear, and it doesn't look like you have a cold. Besides, the mask is afraid of catching a cold, so the hat doesn't make sense, does it?"

Shu Yao closed her eyes and said nonsense: "To tell you the truth, the professor is under a lot of academic pressure, and the problem of hair loss is particularly bothering me. This hat is the latest technological product from Country X to solve the problem of hair loss. Just take two courses of treatment, and you will be guaranteed to show off your hair." The hair is like new, I dare not take it off casually."

professor:"???"

You bully my professor who is only in liberal arts and doesn't understand biological science? ? ?

He was so angry that one Buddha came out of his body and the other two ascended to heaven.

Or are you a top 2 top student in the country, and you actually look up to the ignorant middle-aged and elderly people who believe in MLM, intending to try it yourself, and then use your professional expertise in nerds to write a small paper that MLM is not worth it? ? ?

The classmates below also hugged each other and cried.

They were crying, and the professor was angry, obviously not at the same level of thinking.

"Not to mention other things, the problem of hair loss is really, I just comb it and lose it."

"Is this useful? Is it really useful? I want to buy it."

"It doesn't matter if it's useless, as long as it's not harmful, it's always good to buy and try."

The professor only felt that the anger was burning from the soles of his feet to the top of his head.

Even an elderly man would post rumor-refusing articles in his WeChat circle of friends. What happened to these young people? ? ?

Can the future of the motherland be good?

So when he faced Shu Yao, he was even colder and more ruthless:

"Not to mention anything else, I suspect that you took the class for someone else, and took off your hat and mask to show me your face."

Shu Yao knew his classmate's ability to spread rumors.

His face after disguise is not necessarily [-]% restored to his original face.

But there must be [-] to [-]% alike.

At that time, rumors such as "twin brothers have bloody grievances, love and hatred", "what should I do to save you, my brother who is in a pyramid scheme crisis" will probably spread all over the sky.

It cannot be picked.

Even when Shu Yao went out in the morning, he was confused for a moment why he made such great effort to disguise himself.

Shu Yao could only sigh, and continued to talk nonsense without changing his face: "I dare not pick it."

The professor sneered.

It was not what he expected.

He has taught books for these years, how many final exams have he passed for students who did not take classes seriously?

The students who skipped classes to replace them had first-class eyesight.

Shu Yao said calmly: "After all, I ate too much during the winter vacation and got fat. I'm afraid that the professor won't recognize me, and being seen by others will damage my wisdom."

This time even the professor fell silent.

He looked at Shu Yao's still thin figure.

May I ask how much fat you have eaten?One hundred catties or two hundred catties?Do you need to be so fat that you can't recognize it?

And the students below, pinching their newly raised fat during the holidays, burst into tears.

The professor snapped back to his senses.

No, this is not the priority.

You can't ruin your career in class because of an imposter.

However, when he was about to criticize Shu Yao and start class, the professor adjusted his reading glasses again:

"What about people?"

What about a big man who was stuck here just now, wearing a hat and a mask?

Why didn't you run away?

Are today's students so vulnerable?

Just say a few words and leave the classroom openly? ? ?

Do you want to turn the world upside down?

Shu Yao really couldn't be blamed for this.

He finally let go of the Demon Lord's reserve, and was about to bow his head to listen to the training. When he was bored, he caught a glimpse of a stream of light passing by the sky outside the window.

That stream of light was very bright, reflected under the blue sky and white clouds, almost dazzling.

For some reason, as the streamer passes by, the white clouds recede, and the shadow of the sun dims.

Shu Yao recognized the Lord of Flowing Light at a glance.

He immediately ran without thinking.

High-altitude parabolic is prohibited in the city!

What should you do, Ah Heng, if you are caught by the city management?

No, it doesn't matter if you criticize education and fine you.

If you are caught, how do you explain your black household problem? ? ?