In the next life, remember that I am crazy for you

更新时间2013-2-170:14:24字数：3069

I don't know why I am so dependent on Ziru now, as long as he is around, I feel extra at ease.Before leaving that sad place, I didn't bring my mobile phone.Ziru also said that he called me after he came back, but no one answered. He was always worried that something happened to me, but he didn't expect to meet me at the door of the hotel.

I still couldn't refuse Ziru's help, because I really couldn't find anything to do, Ziru wanted me to live in his private villa, but I refused, I always feel that this is not good!Moreover, standing in front of Ziru, I felt a deep sense of guilt and inferiority complex.I always feel that it is wrong to occupy Ziru's love like this, I always feel... I am not worthy of Ziru.

It may be a long-term habit, I always feel so insecure, not to mention, Ziru accompanied me to have an abortion, and that child...is not Ziru's.I suddenly felt very sick, as long as I think of that man's face, I always feel nauseous.But I have no choice, after all... After all, I have already lost my original innocence.

Where am I qualified to say love to anyone?

I don't want to live in Ziru's private villa, and Ziru has no choice but to buy me a house in the residential area of ​​Fanxingzhuying in City A. I don't want it, because if I accept it, I always feel indebted to Ziru.

But Ziru's answer was that he borrowed money from me to buy this house, and I can pay it back slowly, even if it's a lifetime.I know, he just wants me to feel better and not to think about it, once I accept it, it is actually no different from giving it to me.But what can I do?I thought about leaving, but for the first time Ziru held my hand so domineeringly and refused to let me leave.

He said, since I have come here, why go to another unaccompanied place, at least there is him in city A who can help me, if I go to other urban areas, there is no guarantee that I will not be bullied.

Ziru...had done so much, but she just didn't want me to be bullied.What can I say?Ziru almost knelt down and begged me to stay. Do I still want to hurt Ziru?I, Xu Ruolin, can't and won't do such things as hurting people who are kind to me.

In the end, I had no choice but to stay and lived in the house that Ziru carefully prepared for me. The whole room was decorated in white. Ziru remembered that my favorite color was white.There are a lot of transparent vases in the room. There is water in the vases, and there are many lucky bamboos. You can see this green and fresh bamboo almost everywhere you go.

I don't know how to express the feeling in my heart, looking at these bamboos, I still understand that Ziru has good intentions.After getting so many lucky bamboos, I probably don’t hope that I will get rich, but that I can relax when looking at these green plants and white decorations.The floor-to-ceiling windows are made of white screens, which are made of transparent silk satin. Only when you walk in, you can see the white patterns.

I have a place to live, but a place to work makes me very helpless.

Ziru actually asked me to go to his head office to be his assistant, but what can I do?I don't know anything at all, but Ziru just said that I don't need to do anything, as long as I serve tea and water, just bring tea and water to him, it's usually fine, I can play computer games in his office.

I can only smile wryly. Looking at the current society, there are only a handful of assistants who are treated as well as me, right?

I had no reason to reject Ziru, so I went to Ziru's company in the end.

I didn't want to cause trouble for Ziru, but in the end it was because of my decision that I hurt Ziru.

I work in Ziru's company, because of my appearance, many employees in the company pay attention to me.I hate that feeling very much, so I don't go out of Ziru's office very often, and when I am in the office, Ziru mostly refuses to leave.

Over time, my existence spread in the company.I was very worried that it would have a negative impact on Ziru, but Ziru didn't care, and said that as long as I was by his side, he would feel at ease.Let me find no excuse to resign.But after such a delay, the final result made me unable to bear it.

Ziru's mother found my place to live. I don't know how I survived the short 10 minutes that day, but the facts proved that I still couldn't stay by Ziru's side.

Ziru's mother didn't know where she heard about me, and she also thoroughly investigated my background. That day, Ziru's mother's words were sharp, cruel, and indifferent.It deeply hurt the pain nerves deep in my heart.

Ziru's mother only stayed where I lived for 10 minutes, but I felt as if she stayed there for 10 years.

The next day, instead of going to work, I locked the door, buried myself in cotton wool and cried bitterly.

After staying in city A for so long, this is the first time I buried myself in the quilt and cried bitterly.At this time, I have to admit the fact that I have already... fallen in love with Ziru.

"Miss Xu, I'm Ziru's mother. I don't think you're an idiot. You probably understand why I'm here. In your situation, you're not good enough for my son. You've been by Ziru's side these days. Do you know how many rumors are circulating outside? Do you know that you almost ruined Ziru?"

"I have already found a girl of the right family for Ziru to be engaged to. Please leave Ziru and don't show up again. I will never allow you to ruin Ziru's life." Ziru's mother's words made me very painful.

Ziru's gentleness, Ziru's kindness, everything about Ziru has already been deeply rooted in my heart, and a sharp sword suddenly appeared, trying to cut off those roots, which made me feel extremely painful.

However, I also have to admit that I am not worthy of Ziru.Although Ziru's mother's words were harsh, they touched my heart. I have always felt inferior, but now, I suddenly lost the courage to live.

Without Ziru, it seems... It seems that there is nothing, and there is no reason for me to survive in this world.Ziru called me a lot that day, but I didn't answer, and I didn't turn off the phone, I just looked at the display on the phone screen and wept silently.

In the middle of the night, I went to the bathroom, turned on the faucet, and the cold water flowed into the tub. I was wearing a white suspender nightdress, and I was holding a dagger in my hand.

Lying in the bathtub, I bit my lower lip, the sharp blade slashed across my wrist, the stinging pain came immediately, I gritted my teeth, threw away the dagger, and put the cut hand into the icy cold water.

Is that all right?This is what Ziru's mother wants to see, right?Only after I die, will Ziru...will marry obediently, right?

But that's the stupidest thing I've ever done...

When I gradually regained consciousness, I felt that my right hand was tightly held by a pair of warm hands. I didn't open my eyes, because I knew that the person beside me...was Ziru.

I heard the sound of opening the door, and then a sweet female voice came from my ear: "Zi Ru, do I make you hate me so much?"

"Ah."

"you!"

"I won't marry you. If Ruolin really dies this time, I won't marry you either. In my heart, there will always be only one wife, and that person is not you!"

"Why!! This woman is not clean!!" The sweet voice was hysterical, but it made my heart beat violently.

yeah, i'm not clean...

"Enough! Get out of here!!" Zi Ru's voice was very angry, and it was no longer as calm as before.

I can only smile wryly in my heart, I don't understand why Zi Ru likes me...

"Zi Ru, you...I hate you!!" The girl ran out crying, and Zi Ru kept holding my hand, not letting go for a second.

After the girl left, Zi Ru sighed, "Ruo Lin, you are really not a woman who is very good at acting, you idiot! Open your eyes when you wake up, escape will never solve the problem!!"

I smiled wryly and opened my eyes, looking at Zi Ru's face so close: "Zi Ru, what do you like about me?"

"Maybe you have forgotten what you said, but I haven't forgotten. You said that you are afraid of being left alone, you are afraid of being left behind. I don't know why I like you, but I want to tell you, Ruolin , what I like has always been your heart."

"In this world, there are many people who look clean and pure on the outside, but there are only a handful of people who are truly pure in heart. And you are one of the few people. Ruolin, don't feel inferior, you should be proud, compared to those who are pretending women, you are really much better than them."

I was silent, and at this moment I had to admit that Ziru...is really a perfect person.

However, I still killed Ziru in the end.

It was raining heavily that day, but I still decided to leave Ziru, so after I got better, I sneaked out of the hospital and rushed to the train station, planning to disappear into Ziru's world.

However, just after I got out of the hospital, I saw Zi Ru running from the road opposite the hospital, a car slammed into Zi Ru...

At that moment, the sky turned around, Ziru was carried into the emergency room, and I sat at the door of the emergency room, my whole body was stunned, Ziru... Ziru...

There are only those two words in my mind, I have always hoped that Ziru will be happy, but I am still a disaster, right?

Ziru... is dead.

When I heard the words that the rescue was invalid, I turned around and walked out of the hospital.

I think Ziru's soul hasn't gone far, he won't be willing to leave me alone, I think... I should be able to go with him.

There is a big bridge near the hospital, under the bridge is a fast-flowing river, and I am standing by the bridge at this time.

Looking up at the gray sky, the dark clouds, and the light rain...

I smiled wryly: Ziru, I always thought that I didn’t love you, that I didn’t love you, but it wasn’t until the last moment of my life that I realized that your tenderness regardless of the cost also had a purpose, because from now on, no matter who treats me well , can't replace you, and I... lost you, and I don't have the belief to live.

The moment I was submerged in water, I seemed to see Ziru's face at the bottom of the water. I stretched out my hand to Ziru, and from then on... bid farewell to the world.