East Berlin's June Boat Song

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When the man came to the island, Konstantinovich was taking a large basket of freshly dug potatoes from Alexandre and carrying them on his thin body. He was flushed, and Alexandre, who was even weaker behind him, was pale and struggling to breathe. He helped him carry the basket with his hands, hoping to save him some energy.

The man watched the group of potato-digging children for a long time. When the evening approached, he called out a dozen children and told them that he wanted them to participate in a wrestling match. The two who won could leave here and go to very warm place.

"There is hot water, a stove, and smoked fish." He smiled kindly, and his gentle gaze lit a small flame in the hearts of these ignorant children.

Alexandre saw that Konstantinovich's eyes shone with hope.His eyes were burning, as if he had already stood beside a warm campfire.

He was a little scared.

He knew Konstantinovich was the best of the group, but he couldn't.He lost in a few rounds, retreated with a bruised nose, and watched his good friend fight with his opponent like a vicious little leopard on the field, his body was covered in blood, his cheeks were swollen, and his eyes were almost open not open.

He really wants to go, Alexandre thought, and I should bless him.

But just as he was about to win, Konstantinovich told the man that he hadn't fought Alexandre yet.

The man narrowed his sly eyes, he acquiesced in the little leopard's arrogance and rudeness, so he let Alexandre take the stage again.

Konstantinovich, the boy with tears all over his face, after punching his friend, faced his friend's weak counterattack, fell to the ground with a bang, and said, I lost.

The man clapped his hands, his eyes full of meaningful and undisguised admiration.Because he knows that the most terrifying and useful thing in this world is emotion.He saw the bond that could never be broken between the two children.He knew it was impossible to take one away.

So Konstantinovich, relying on his poor acting skills, took his friends and left the bitter cold island.They were 12 years old that year, and they stayed in the Gulag for two full years. The wind and snow left scars on their thin bodies that could not be removed in their entire lives.On the day they left, Konstantinovich wrapped a blanket over Alexandre's head and whispered in his ear not to look back.

Don't look back, don't meet the eyes of your parents, because that eye will make it difficult for you to leave.

He understood it then, but from that moment Konstantinovich became silent.

Then they did get hot water, hot food, and a warm fire.

However, they don't know that there is something hotter than these in this world, and that is human blood.

From the time they picked up the knife and started training, Konstantinovich made up his mind to get rid of his father's name. Since then, he is no longer the son of Konstantin, but Julian, himself.

The name Julian Azrael would accompany him throughout his life. He never saw his parents again until his death, and he no longer missed them.

But Alexander Alexandr Kopatsky got rid of himself, he rejected Alexander, he also rejected Alexandre, he lived under the nickname that his friends called him, and since then he has been called Sasha Kopaczki,

This name will also accompany him throughout his life, but he is sure that at the last moment of his life, he will find himself.

The training was tough, but it was many times better than life on the island.Sasha thanked Julian for bringing him to a warm place. In the dormitory covered with thick quilts and with a stove burning, he could see the clear night sky and the bright moon.This was something they hadn't seen for two years, and the howling wind seemed to have disappeared.

But that day, when they faced the woman in the gorgeous long dress, the cold wind seemed to return, stirring up a tsunami in their hearts, making their faces pale as death.

Julian held the knife and stabbed the woman on the neck. The woman looked at the two children in disbelief. She shivered and shivered, and her terrified eyes reflected two more terrified children.Why are they so strong?Why is the child holding a knife?why are they crying

Sasha felt like he was going to throw up, and the woman's eyes made his stomach churn.Julian gritted his teeth, pushed Sasha behind him, glanced at his friend who was trembling with fright, and closed his eyes in pain.

At that moment, he made up his mind.

The blood splattered all over him, so hot it seemed to burn him.He screamed, turned and ran, completely forgetting that there was a friend who was stunned by fright behind him. He ran through the muddy alleys of Leningrad and the dimly lit embankment of the Neva River, and jumped without thinking. Into the cold river water.

Sasha was terrified. Julian's previous tears were blowing on his face along the wind. He saw that he was still crying in the river, and he suddenly felt that it would be good to die with him just like this.

So he too jumped into the river.

The coldness of the Neva River in December is still deeply in his mind. Later, he was picked up by Julian, and the two hid in a corner of a nearby station. The kind old woman thought they were begging children and gave him They have a bowl of hot soup.Because of that bowl of hot soup, they survived the night of the first murder.

No, it should be the night when Julian killed someone for the first time.

Because Sasha didn't start killing until he was 14.

For countless missions, Julian acquiesced that he did it himself. He protected Sasha behind him, and stabbed himself into the target's belly with a knife, and the intestines rolled out. expressions, and even a smile at the end.

Sasha thought he was crazy.

But Julian just hugged Sasha and cried, apologizing to him again.

He cried at the top of his lungs, one night when he was delirious from his injuries.

He thought that after leaving the Gulag, there would be a bright and warm world, but he didn't expect it to be a deeper darkness.

He once again took Sasha into another dark world.

He regretted it, he didn't want Sasha to kill people, so it would be good for everyone to do it themselves.

Sasha kissed him desperately and told him it was okay, he could live with this world.He can really bear it, just like he shoveled snow and dug potatoes in the Gulag.So at the age of 14, when Julian pulled him behind as usual during a mission, he turned around and grabbed Julian.

He said, let me come this time.

Under Julian's astonished gaze, he gritted his teeth and killed the terrified man.

The technique was very sharp, and the man did not suffer much.He turned to Julian and smiled, but saw Julian crying.

He thought that what he did would make Julian feel relieved, but he didn't expect that it would only make him feel more guilty.The more guilty he was, the more he wanted to be relieved, and this feeling became an endless loop, and in the end it overwhelmed both of them.

One day, after they kissed, they looked into each other's eyes and shivered at the same time.

What's going on here?They don't understand.Because they are only 15 years old, although they have killed many, many people, emotionally, they are still young and ignorant teenagers.

At first, they thought they saw themselves in each other.When they saw each other, they would think of themselves killing people.Terrible memories came flooding back, making them tremble uncontrollably.

But later, Sasha understood more clearly, what lies between them is still that kind of extremely dull emotion, a fetter that can never be shaken off.

Julian feels guilty towards Sasha, but because of this guilt, Sasha feels guilty towards him in turn.

Between them, there is a kind of dazed, pure sacrifice-like relationship, giving without expecting anything in return, and it is unclear whether it is to make the other person feel better or to make oneself feel better.

It's too complicated, so complicated that they can't figure it out at all, but the only thing they know is that they can't do without each other.Because so far it is not too much to say that they survived for the other party.

His business ability was amazing. Later, the man felt that they could have greater potential to be tapped, so he sent them to Dzerzhinsky Institute of Higher Education to study.They spent the first year peacefully and even made two lovely friends.

When the girl named Sonia blushed and confessed to Julian, he saw for the first time that Julian actually looked so embarrassed.He didn't know what to say anymore, he just blushed and looked at himself.

Later he asked, why don't you accept that girl?

Julian was just silent, then hugged him.

He didn't answer the question, because they understood each other very well.

Because Sasha has no happiness, it is impossible for Julian to achieve happiness.In Sonia's tears, Sasha clearly realized that he had become a burden for Julian's life.As long as he is there, Julian will not be able to obtain happiness in this life.And because Julian cannot be happy, he cannot be happy either.

Another vicious cycle.

Fast-forward to 1937, the Great Purge has entered a time of terror, and the man needs them.The murder this time was not an assassination like before, it could even be called a "bloodbath".At first Sasha thought he could bear it, but after he sent his family away in the winter of 38, the misty tears of the five-year-old girl made him completely despair.

That night, as if in a daze, he took out the gun and hit himself in the head.

He still remembers how flustered Julian was at that time, he was terrified, more helpless and terrified than ever before when he killed someone.He later saved him in his own way, and since then he has had an extra scratch on his neck.

This wound reminded him that his life was tied to Julian. If he died, Julian would die without hesitation.

But he didn't want Julian dead.

They promised each other that they would never leave each other, but they hoped that the other could really get rid of themselves.They are each other's spells, trapping each other and trapping themselves.

Perhaps one day, we will finally be freed from this bondage.

He thought so, but when the real separation came, he almost died.

He might have died if he hadn't been around Sonia, a friend who was as sad as he was.He couldn't believe that he was abandoned by Julian, and he couldn't believe that the person who was still kissing him yesterday disappeared today, and went to a bright place where he could gain honor.

He became an upright soldier who lived under the sun and won glory for the country.

And he was thrown into this land of shadow of death.

In the dark night, harvest life.