God said I would meet you

The collapse sometimes comes suddenly, and Lin Jinyu actually has no one else to talk about these things. He seems to have suddenly opened up a chatterbox, babbling a lot logically or illogically—begging Zhang Xinli to come back at one moment, and letting him go at another moment , Roll as far as you can, and then mutter to yourself regretting it.

"Okay, okay," Lin Ye didn't avoid Lin Jinyu, who was leaning over, he seemed to hesitate for a while, and finally put his arm around his back slowly: "It's fine when you're done crying, we're still together when we're apart." It’s all normal things, think about the future path, either pick it up or let it go.”

Lin Jinyu was still leaning on his shoulder blades, people really, really need a hug at certain times, no matter who it is, so he grabbed Lin Ye's clothes on the back even more, as if hugging him back.

"...Don't hold it, 20 yuan a piece of street stalls, just pull it twice and it will be broken," Lin Ye froze for a moment, then slowly relaxed, patted his back lightly, and remained silent for a long time , whispered: "Actually...you are really lucky."

He knew that Lin Jinyu didn't listen to what he was saying, but he still said softly: "I used to have your parents by my side, and then I had your little straight man by my side, and now there are still people who follow you and stay with you."

Probably everyone thinks that other people are lucky and their own is unlucky. In Lin Jinyu's eyes, Lin Ye is quite at ease and unrestrained.

A crescent moon shone on the people of the two places. Later, Lin Jinyu forgot how he slowed down, how he stood up, and how he went back. In short, when he really got out of the trough and got back to normal, it was already the next morning. .

The light tube above her head was blindingly white, and the mat was refreshing—Lin Jinyu hadn't slept so comfortably in a long time.

He was dazed for a while, then turned to look at the side of the single bed.

There was a familiar person lying on the damp ground. Lin Ye probably saw that he was too sad yesterday, so he showed mercy and let him sleep in the bed once. Lin Jinyu sat quietly for a while, recalling the self that was similar to Lin Daiyu's upper body yesterday.

He got better after crying a lot, and now he started to despise that hypocritical self again.What's the point?It's so cheap.

The piano store was open on the side of the main road, and it was already very noisy at this time. Lin Ye turned over and woke up to the sharp horns of passing traffic. Seeing Lin Jinyu standing there in a daze, he yawned and said, "Morning, Woke up so early today."

Lin Jinyu said, "Morning."

Lin Ye scratched his messy hair, combined with what happened last night, he knew what he was thinking about just by looking at Lin Jinyu.

It’s good, think about it, think about it, life lies in thinking, and only when you think clearly can you live a good life.

There was a commercial performance yesterday, in order to catch up with the rehearsal, he didn't eat much for dinner, and then he ran for an unknown number of kilometers, so he couldn't help feeling hungry at the moment.Lin Ye got up, walked out while stretching, and said, "Think about your life carefully, I'll go out and buy two fried rice." After speaking, he went to the small toilet to wash up.

Lin Jinyu didn't speak, and let him go out.

……

Not long after, Lin Ye came back with two bags of fried rice, and found that Lin Jinyu had already woken up, was fully dressed, and was taking her clothes out of the cabinet one by one and putting them into the suitcase.

"?" Lin Ye walked over and said, "What is this for?"

"It's been bothering you for a long time, and it's not a problem to stay here all the time." Lin Jinyu bent over and folded her clothes quickly: "I figured it out, it's time to go back to school."

I don't want to admit it, but I have to admit that the reason why he has been staying in Shanghai for so many days is because subconsciously he is still nostalgic for the past feelings, thinking that he is affectionately waiting for someone who will not turn back.

If you can't wait, then don't wait.

"Now?" Lin Ye put his breakfast aside: "It's not yet the start of school, what can you do when you go back?"

"Doing the same thing as you, I still owe a lot of money to n many friends, and I can't pay them back one by one," Lin Jinyu kept on saying, "The reason why you decided to come to Shanghai to make a living and not go to other places is because Did you graduate from the school here?"

A person's social network is established according to the region. The birthplace where he grew up, the place where he graduated from the university, and the place where he works are the three most important places in a person's life. Like Lin Ye, the brothers and sisters Lin Jinyu knew, the same year Most of the classmates and teachers are there. As long as he goes back, those people will also help him, introduce him to cheap and easy-to-live houses, introduce part-time jobs, and tutors. Most of what Lin Jinyu needs in return is a meal, or a few days. It's only ten yuan for an intermediary fee.

"... After so many days of relationship, you can see this clearly," Lin Ye said: "I thought you didn't hear anything outside the window, and just played games to indulge and be decadent."

He paused, and then said: "...What about him?"

"He left a long time ago, maybe he left the next day after we broke up." Lin Jinyu didn't tell him to shut up like many times before, don't mention that name, and said calmly without raising his head: "I still have my own Life...so be it."

So be it.

Since he was 16 years old, he loved to take the initiative to recruit Zhang Xinli. After n years of recruiting, Zhang Xinli always walked cleanly. He did it when he transferred from high school, and he still does it now.After crying, all the anguish and reluctance seemed to flow away with the tears. Lin Jinyu got up this morning and thought about it for a long time, but suddenly felt very boring.

It was a feeling of enlightenment, he was like a dog, he came and went when he wanted it, when Zhang Xinli casually said "It's your boyfriend", he ignored the past, as if he had lost his memory. It's really cheap to be with someone else.

Lin Jinyu thought: Master should not be a dog anymore, but a human being.

He said that year that he would never abandon his love in order to survive. He did it, but some people didn't. Now that love is gone, only survival is left.

Now he has really decided to live his original life like before meeting Zhang Xinli, go to school, do what he wants to do, and become the person he wants to be.

"You have to think clearly," Lin Ye introduced Evan to him, and deliberately said some words to stimulate him. Although the purpose is not to induce or force him to go back to Zhang Xinli, but just to let him think clearly and see his heart clearly , but Lin Jinyu really didn't look back, he still felt a pity from the bottom of his heart: "Sometimes it's a mistake, and if you miss it, you really miss it."

miss?

Lin Jinyu straightened up, as if chewing the word, then "clicked" the suitcase lying on the ground, turned to look at him, and said, "Sometimes I think...it's better to miss it."

Secret love is the most beautiful and sincere thing. He once wanted to go back to the past, but if he really went back, Lin Jinyu found that he seemed to be unable to do anything.

I'm desolate and exhausted, so it's better not to meet everyone in the first place.

"..."

Lin Jinyu had just bought the tickets online, and he said bluntly, "Let's go, goodbye."

……

The "Leo" in Zeng Yike's song, at the end of July, Lin Jinyu returned to school.

He is still a good 22 years old, feeling lost and worried, but like Wang Xiaobo at the age of 21, he also wants to love, eat, and become a half-dark cloud in the sky.

Senior brothers and sisters introduced him to cheap houses around the school, and he started to work as a tutor by virtue of the advantages of local famous schools. At that time, the education and training industry was booming, and no one would arrest college students' tutors who did extracurricular tutoring even if they couldn't get a teacher qualification certificate. Lin Jinyu After working for a day and taking a day off, when I have free time, I pick up the books and start reviewing again, and I can get hundreds of dollars a week.

Although it is not much, a single man can feed his whole family without hunger. This amount of money is always enough for one person in cities where prices are not as high as Shanghai.

Life is gradually calming down.

Lin Jinyu later felt that he and Zhang Xinli really had countless opportunities to drift away. At any point in time, as long as certain things deviated by a small amount, they would really say goodbye forever. Later, when they became strangers to each other.

But heaven seems to have its own arrangements... If there is such a thing as a god or heaven.

The red thread representing love and marriage still seems to be tightly tied to the wrists of the two. Whenever they are about to drift away, the invisible thread starts to pull, pulling them closer and closer.

When Lin Jinyu was busy choosing graduation topics and racking his brains for the opening report, Zhang Xinli's childhood friend La Long suddenly sent him a message: He has been admitted to university.

The author says:

Note: "I was 21 years old that year. In the golden age of my life, I had a lot of extravagant wishes. I wanted to love, eat, and become a half-dark cloud in the sky in an instant." From Wang Xiaobo's "Golden era".