writing coffee

Qianli said that she might not come to the store during the New Year's Day, but it turned out that she hadn't been to the store since New Year's Day, and it has been a whole month and a half.It is said that it was because she seldom went home on weekends, and she was arrested and taken to the airport as soon as she walked out of the exam room after the exam, and went abroad with her parents on a trip.

When she called me at the airport, pretending to cry and promised that she would come back to accompany me on New Year’s Eve, I don’t know why, but I didn’t tell her that I was going to my dad’s place for the New Year’s Eve, just jokingly said, " Did it ever occur to you that I might like someone more?"

"Murong, you will be happier with me, trust me!"

I sneered.

So I lived alone day by day, with nothing to show for it.

It was not until the 29th day that something worth mentioning happened: Maizi followed Xiao Churan back to his hometown in the north to celebrate the New Year.When Maizi called to tell me, his tone was extremely heavy, as if he had made a choice to save mankind.I don't know the specific details, and it doesn't matter, what matters is the meaning behind this matter.I guess it won't be long before they get their wedding invitations.

Maizi is going to marry someone, and she is marrying Xiao Churan.I'm a bit overwhelmed, but when I think about it, it's so good that two people who love each other are finally going to live together in a way that everyone loves to see.They will get the blessings of all relatives and friends, and even the eyes cast by strangers will be full of sincere goodwill.

However, I do not deny that I feel a little lost.Now, love has taken up most of their lives, and in the future, family will take away their little free time. When their children are born, they may even go to my coffee shop for a sip of warm water All gone.

Who says marriage is the tomb of love, shouldn't it be the tomb of friendship?

Heh, thinking of this, he couldn't help but smile wryly, lowering his head slightly to cover up the marks on the corners of his mouth.The scenery outside the window is fading away quickly, the sky is almost dusk, and the high-speed rail will arrive in the station in less than 10 minutes. Today is Chinese New Year's Eve, and I abide by my agreement with my father and go home to celebrate the New Year.

But the truth is, that's just my father's house.

I was born and raised in City G, went to university in City G, and still work and live there.Our family’s house used to be in the old town of G City. There were towering trees in the community, and it was shaded everywhere in summer.Later my mother left, and later I moved out. Later, the university where my father worked established a new branch campus in the university district of Z City, and my father was appointed as the dean of the liberal arts department of the branch campus.

City Z is near the sea and has a beautiful scenery. It is a famous tourist city, but it is still an hour away from City G by high-speed train.The school allocated a dormitory to each teacher. At first, my father only went home once every weekend.

I originally thought that Aunt Xin would also be transferred to City Z to be with my father, but they didn't seem to have such plans, so I just thought.I never asked about the "family affairs" between my father and Aunt Xin, and I knew that was not something I should talk about.Until one time my father fell ill at school and was receiving an IV in the hospital. Aunt Xin hurried over to take care of him and asked me to help pick up my brother from school.

Afterwards, I couldn't help but ask Aunt Xin—from very early on, Aunt Xin became the bridge of communication between me and my father.

She said: "Xiaozhi is still in elementary school here, I have to take care of him, it's fine now, let's talk about it when Xiaozhi enters junior high school."

"Can't primary schools be transferred? Isn't there a primary school and a secondary school in the university town of Z city? My dad has to work hard on both sides. You have to take care of both sides, so it's even harder."

At that time, we were sitting in a coffee shop near my brother's school, chatting while waiting for my brother to leave school.She was sitting opposite me, and we were each holding the coffee cups in our hands. Suddenly, she stretched out her right hand and patted the back of my hand lightly, smiled gratifiedly, and whispered, "You're still here."

I instantly understood.

Which wife doesn't want to spend day and night with her husband?What mother doesn't want the father of her child to be with her child?It must be my father who is worried about me, and this woman is so virtuous.

So I deliberately drove to Z city to meet my father and asked him the same question.

We walked on the tree-lined avenue of the university campus, because it was close to the parking lot, and there were few people. Two or three small birds the size of a palm walked in small steps not far from us, and everyone was calm. "Dad, my brother is still young, you can't let him get used to being separated from his father at such a young age."

He sighed, "I understand, it's just that the dormitory here is too crowded, and I'm worried that they won't feel comfortable living here together."

"Then sell the house in City G and buy a good one here."

He stopped and looked at me in surprise.

My face was calm, and I analyzed objectively: "The environment here is very good, you and Aunt Xin are getting older, and the old house in G City is not comfortable to live in, and the education in Z City is also developing very well. It is also very convenient to go to school here, killing three birds with one stone.”

He still couldn't believe that I would say something like this, "Xiaoshi, there is your mother in that house—"

"Dad," I interrupted him, with a normal tone, "It's just a house. The people here are the most important. Life must move forward, right? Why bother to miss those old loves."

He looked at me deeply, but just said, "Xiaoshi, Dad is very grateful for your concern, Dad will consider this matter."

I decided to press the last straw, "Dad, do you know what my mother would say if she was there?"

He was moved for a moment, and waited for me to speak.

I think of the way my mother usually talks, and I feel a little nostalgic. "She would say that a house is nothing more than a house. My home is where you are."

This is indeed something my mother would say, but it still touched my father when it came out of my mouth.

The train came into the station, and my father sent a text message at the right time: Xiaoshi, Dad's car is at the south gate, you can see it when you come out and turn right.

I held the New Year's goods in my hand and was about to get off the car.I took the high-speed rail because I was afraid of traffic jams during the Spring Festival travel season, but I didn’t expect to trouble my father to pick me up at the station. What a mistake.

Just as I got off the high-speed rail and walked towards the south gate, Qianli called me two times in a row, but I didn't answer it. I thought it was listening to music. After getting into my father's car, I turned the phone to silent .

The high-speed rail station is a bit far from home, but fortunately, the traffic jam in City Z is not serious, and it takes half an hour to arrive.

I don't know if it's because I've grown up or my father is getting old, or because the distance and time have blurred the boundaries between right and wrong, but we get along a lot more harmoniously.When taking the elevator upstairs from the underground parking lot, my father seemed very happy. He said, "Aunt Xin has tidied up your room. Will you leave after the fifteenth day at home this year?"

For a moment, I felt incredible, as if I heard the Arabian Nights.After fifteen?I haven't even passed the fifth day of junior high school, and this time, I plan to leave after the first day of junior high school... But seeing my father's happy face, I couldn't say anything about the refusal, so I had to answer vaguely, "Let's see .”

My father also seemed to realize that this request was too difficult for me, and he didn't show any disappointment. Instead, he was relieved that I didn't directly refuse, and forced a smile on his face.

I feel sore, we will never go back to the way we used to be, cuddling and being intimate with each other.

"Xiaoshi is back~" While my father was still taking out the keys, Aunt Xin opened the door from the inside, and when she saw me, she smiled sincerely.

"Aunt Xin, Happy New Year!" I bowed respectfully for a new year.

"Happy New Year! Come in, be hungry, and dinner will be ready soon!" Before she could take off her apron, she took the things in my hand and babbled, "Don't bring so many things when you go home next time. Trouble! There is everything to eat at home~”

"I didn't buy food, I brought some tea for my father, this is your skin care product, I hope Aunt Xin will be younger and younger~"

"Hey~" She was actually a little embarrassed, "Thank you Xiaoshi!"

"Where's my brother? This is a toy for him." I really didn't know what gift to buy for the child. It took a long time to buy a set of Lego blocks. Batman's, ten-year-old children like it, right?

"It's in the room," Aunt Xin replied, and then shouted at the top of her voice, "Xiao Zhi! My sister is back!" As if I came back often.

There was no movement in the room, and my father said, "I'll go and have a look. I guess he's listening to music with headphones on. I'll ask him to come out for dinner."

Aunt Xin put the things on the cabinet and said to me: "I'll just go and bring out the soup, eat first, don't be hungry~"

I can't laugh or cry, where am I hungry? "Let me help you."

"Okay, come and help Aunt Xin set the dishes." She smiled kindly and led me to the kitchen.

This reaction made me feel warm. She didn't treat me as a guest, but as a child.

The dishes and chopsticks were all set, and the father brought out the younger brother. The child didn't know what was wrong, and was a little unhappy.

Aunt Xin stood next to me and waved at him, "What's wrong with Xiao Zhi? Come here to say New Year's greetings to my sister, and my sister bought you a present~Come~"

The kid was still not in high spirits, and walked over listlessly, without looking at me with his head down.

What's going on here?Uncomfortable or bullied?The last time we met, was he still a question baby who pestered me to ask questions, or did children look the same every day?

"Xiaozhi, Happy New Year!" I prepared the New Year's money, but it's inconvenient to take it out now. In order to coax him, I took a step to get the toy set from the cabinet, bent down and handed it to him, "Do you like Batman?" ?”

He raised his head suddenly and slammed the box in my hand away. I was caught off guard, and the box fell out of my hand and fell heavily on the floor with a "bang".

"I don't want your stuff! You're a disgusting gay!" he said.

I froze in place.

"Murongzhi!" Father snarled, his face was ashen, and he was so angry——

"Dad!" I was startled by his actions, and I took a step forward and tightly grasped his raised right hand.

The younger brother... visibly flinched, but stubbornly straightened his waist and raised his chin, "I'm not wrong!" His eyes were red, wronged and angry, but he was righteous.Like I was the one who hurt someone, like he was the one who got hurt.

"Xiaozhi!" Aunt Xin grabbed his shoulder in a panic, her tone full of disbelief, "How could you say such things to my sister? Hurry up and apologize to my sister!"

"I don't!" He yelled this sentence with all his strength, so hard that he was crying, he broke away from Aunt Xin's hand, turned and ran towards the room.

My father was very angry, his chest was heaving violently, I felt his whole body trembling, "Dad, Dad! Calm down, don't be like this... my brother is still young, he... is not sensible, don't be angry..."

Aunt Xin was also frightened. She held her father's palm with one hand, and kept stroking his back with the other hand. With moist eyes, she called her father's name over and over again.

I watched this scene and suddenly felt that life is so absurd!Absurdly jaw-dropping!A wave of desperation lodged in my throat, making it hard to breathe and barely able to stand.I let go of my father's hand and staggered back. Standing in this square inch, it was as if I was standing between the vast sky and the earth, walking alone, alone.

I just want to get out of here.

Aunt Xin helped her father to sit down, but his father still got angry and said in a hoarse voice: "I'm fine, you go and bring him out."

Aunt Xin didn't intend to dissuade her, she turned around obediently and was about to leave.

"Dad!" I suppressed the turbulent emotions in my heart, walked over and grabbed Aunt Xin's sleeve, "Aunt Xin, please help me see my brother, I will talk to my dad."

Aunt Xin paused and turned around slowly.From the very beginning, she didn't dare to look at me, but now that she turned around, tears were streaming down her face.She choked up, "Xiaoshi, I'm sorry, Xiaozhi..."

"I know," what do I know?I don't know anything, and I don't want to know anything.I couldn't bear her tears, and I couldn't say more comforting words, so I just repeated, "Aunt Xin, go and see your brother, I'll talk to my dad."

she left.

I took a long, slow breath before turning to face my father.

He covered his face with his hands, put it down again slumped, looked at me in pain, and blamed himself deeply: "It's Dad's fault."

"It's not your fault, Dad, no." I bent down to hold his hand, and squatted down at his feet.This sentence is sincere and without complaint.Although my father never accepted my orientation, he never spoke ill of me in this matter. He just tried to change me. All the pain I experienced was due to my own willful actions. people.

On the contrary, because of me, my father has nowhere to rest.

"Blame me. I used to be ignorant, narrow-minded, and selfish. I gave him a bad example, and I didn't discipline him properly. That's why he speaks disrespectfully to you. Xiaoshi, Dad is very ashamed, Dad..." He choked up, "Dad, I'm sorry... ..."

Hot air surged into my eye sockets, burning the corners of my eyes sorely.I have always understood what my mother said about my father's "limitation", not the limitation of thinking, but the limitation of identity. "Being a teacher" is such a heavy moral shackle, which is put on my upright father. He has to be self-demanding and cautious.How dare he accept what the world cannot tolerate?But now, for me, he also decided to tolerate.

I held his hand tightly and looked up into his eyes, "Father, there are too many ignorant, narrow-minded or selfish people in this world, but among those people, there will never be you, never."

Undercurrents surged in his eyes, and he almost wanted to burst out of his eyes.

"Dad, my brother is still young and he is not sensible. Don't blame him too much."

"He shouldn't—"

"You just wanted to hit your brother, Dad, but you never hit me."

The father was embarrassed, but still said: "Since he did something wrong, he should be punished. I will not beat him, but I will never condone him in this matter."

Well, I understand, I was also taught by him, didn't I.

I stood up slowly, my legs were a little numb, and I straightened the corners of my clothes on the spot before walking over to get the bag from the cabinet and put it on my back.

My father looked at me in surprise, as if caught off guard by my action.

"Dad, I'll come back to see you another day." I said.

"Xiaoshi..." He stood up abruptly, "You...are leaving?"

"Are you going to teach my brother a lesson in front of me?" I have been thinking about this reason since the very beginning.

He came over and reached out to unload my luggage, "Then you can't go, where are you going alone? How can Dad rest assured that you will spend the New Year outside alone?"

I held his hand, looked into his eyes, and said calmly: "Dad, I'm going back to City G, there is someone waiting for me to celebrate the New Year with you, don't worry."

He looked at me again in surprise, but this time, he couldn't say anything to persuade me to stay.

"Talk to Aunt Xin for me," the tearful face flashed in my mind, I paused, and said, "Dad, don't make Aunt Xin sad tonight on New Year's Eve. What happened to my brother is after the New Year's Eve." Let's talk." After finishing speaking, without waiting for his answer, he turned around and left.

"Xiaoshi," my father chased after me, "Dad sent you..."

"Dad," I gritted my teeth without looking back, and finally couldn't help begging him, "Let me go alone, is that okay?"

He was silent.

I couldn't bear to speculate on the expression on his face at this moment, opened the door, and left the house as if fleeing.

How can anyone wait for me to celebrate the New Year?I bought a return ticket for tomorrow. Tonight, I may not even be able to go back to City G.

Sitting dumbly in the ticket hall of the high-speed rail station, I chewed those two hurtful words over and over again, hoping that the pain would last me until dawn, but I waited three hours later until someone canceled his trip.

When I returned to G City, New Year's Eve had already passed, and the new year came uninvited. I was already dying of hunger, exhausted physically and mentally.The community is not the quiet night as I imagined, but brightly lit, as bright as day.

Yes, New Year's Eve, it's New Year's Eve.

Like a vampire who is afraid of the sun, I walk weakly and palely in the shadow of every tree, afraid of my own embarrassment, and I have nothing to hide under the light.This road has never been so long. I wanted to sit on the ground a few times, ignoring it and howling, but the string of reason was still stretched, pulling me to move my steps mechanically.

Walk to the end of the last human-shaped path and cross an unobstructed driveway to finish.I stopped at the edge of darkness, unable to move any further.

In the brightly lit place across the road, I saw Jian Qianli.