The honest person is you

-13-

Abe Seimei said that everyone in the world will be deceived sometimes.When he was young in the past, he was also in a trance because of foreign objects, and his thoughts were restless.

Abe Seimei regards it as a "ghost" that exists in people's hearts, and in your understanding, this is equivalent to the evil desire in immortality.

Evil desires are endless, making people ignorant, greedy, and depraved...

Whispering whispers are as light as fog, Miscanthus lingering in the courtyard, and the afterglow of the setting sun permeating like splashes of ink, his face seems to be filled with an incomparably warm light in the rays of the sun.

When he spoke, he maintained a gentle and calm tone, and the eyes that were very similar to that person even showed the same color.

You couldn't help yourself for a while, and gently stroked his cheek. On this face that was very similar to that person, the expression displayed was calm and without waves.

Ka Moho Hoken obviously has the same blood as that person, but there are very few parts of him that can overlap with that person, and Abe Seimei is only Ka Mo Tadayaki's disciple, but he is very similar to that person in both his demeanor and tone.

"Talk to me more, Seimei..."

You leaned against his body, wrapped your arms around his neck, in a trance, you seemed to return to the time when that person was still alive, and you embraced him in the same way.

"What are you going to say?" Abe Seimei asked you.

You replied: "Anything is fine, as long as I can hear your voice."

A voice that speaks to you in a familiar, gentle tone.

Thin clouds and mist shrouded the mountains in the distance, the setting sun was covered by the clouds like blood, and the sky gradually dimmed. Only the outline of the edge could be vaguely seen on this face with soft brows and eyes.

You stroked his forehead and eyes slowly with your fingers, the sun faded, the moon was not yet clear, and there were only blurred outlines in your sight, but your memory was filling the field of vision at this moment - it made you feel, You are touching that person's face.

That person has a pale and weak face, but the expression between his brows and eyes is extremely gentle and focused. His eyes are fixed on you, and that gaze is just like the love affair between you.

A sincere, precious love... a treasure that you can never let go of in your life.

You kissed his lips and cheeks, the feeling was very real and soft, his breath was in front of your face, and you pressed against his body tightly.

"I love you……"

You said to him: "I love you so much..."

Your life did not usher in the end of premature death, but that love affair was fleeting, as if your fate, which was judged to be "early death", was fulfilled in love in this way.

Tears wet your face, and you can't help yourself, but a well-proportioned hand wiped away the tears on your face.

So warm and gentle.

This hand that was stained with your tears gently held your hand, and those fingers stretched out from between your fingers, and finally intersected with your fingers.

In the past, you've heard the saying "ten fingers connect to a heart", as if you can touch his heart by holding his fingers.

"Who is 'I'? "

When he kissed your smooth and beautiful back, you heard him ask you so.

You didn't answer.

……

……

In warm spring, Abe Seimei was wearing his white safari suit, leaning on the porch to drink, and the thin sunlight fell obliquely on the porch, as if fine snow had melted on his drunken face.

You can only see that his lips are as bright red and beautiful as if they had been smeared with lip balm.

He has always been casual, even if he saw you, he didn't get up and restrain himself.You crouch down and lie down beside him slowly.

The wooden porch is too hard, so you ask Qingming to stretch out his hand, pull it under your head, and rest on his arm.Abe Seimei said helplessly that you are really good at calling people, but at the same time lowered his head.

You finished your drink, raised your face and kissed his lips, the slightly drunkenness seemed to make you feel dizzy.You turned over and put your head against his chest, lying on top of him.He hugged your body and gently stroked your hair and back.

The incomparably chaotic thoughts weave a charming and beautiful illusory dream.It was like turning back time and returning to the time when that person was still alive.

Swelling drunkenly, your fingers groped through a distorted field of vision until they found the man's face.

You raised your face, put your lips against his chin, and kissed his face delicately.

His voice—a gentle, helpless and tolerant tone, your chaotic mind can't reflect his meaning, but it doesn't prevent you from expressing your unstoppable love for him.

At this moment, you can finally tell him that you also look forward to being with him forever, just like he used to kiss your intertwined hair tenderly and make a wish to "grow your hair and grow old together" with you.

You made no secret of your admiration for him, just as he expressed his friendship with you.

In a hazy state of consciousness, you grabbed his finger and pressed the warm finger to your lips, and you kept asking him if he loved you.

You ask him if his love for you is as sincere and consistent as yours.

He was silent and didn't speak, but you persisted, and finally you heard a small sound, like a crack in the ice when the winter snow first fell, but at this time you had already fallen asleep.

When you wake up again, you only remember that you had a dream.

It was a... dream filled with the figure of that person.

You talked about your love for each other, and made a vow to be together forever, and you held his hand tightly and asked him to tell you whether his love for you was consistent.

Recalling all this, your gaze touched Abe Seimei's face.

It becomes increasingly difficult for you to tell whether these "memories" actually existed in the past or were fabricated from the present.

You just feel like you're getting deeper and deeper.

……

……

Even if you realize that you have sunk too much now, you have no intention of restraining yourself.

You know better than anyone what your thoughts about that person will make you.At least for now, when you hold Abe Seimei's hand, it seems that part of the vacancy has been filled.

However, even if you don't try to understand his intentions, you will gradually understand the difference between them when you get along day and night.

Compared with the person who is doing his best for the family, Abe Seimei seems a bit "indifferent".

He didn't care about the situation in the court, nor did he care about the man in the palace. He even covered the entrance of the mansion with a curse, so that the courtiers who wanted to come to him to ask him to help couldn't do anything.

You once sat with him on the porch in front of the courtyard, watching the people outside being blocked by illusions, while his expression was as usual, unmoved by the sorrow or anxiety of those who came.

"I thought you would agree."

When you said that, Abe Seimei asked you back: "Why did I agree?"

Because in your impression, that person will never refuse colleagues who ask to come.

Because that person is the Patriarch of the Kamo Family, the leader of the Onmyoji family favored by His Majesty the most.

The moment you subconsciously compare them is also the moment when you start to differentiate them.Because the impression of Abe Seimei will gradually remain in your mind, rather than being covered and replaced by that person.

Abe Seimei seems indifferent and indifferent to others, but when he showed his "spells" in front of the officials, he also used illusions, rather than hurting a frog or a turtle.

When you treat someone you care about, you will feel that everything in the world is incomparable to him, but in Abe Seimei's mouth, all lives seem to be equivalent, so even birds, insects and ants are not inferior to other lives.

When he says that, you try to understand him for the first time.

Abe Seimei said that he never thought about saving more people, and the reason why he practiced Onmyoji was just because he found it interesting.

You've heard similar claims from other people in the past -- and that person was none other than Ashiya Michimitsu.

Because he thought it was interesting, he was entrusted with casting a curse to kill someone.Also because it was interesting, he hid part of the body of "Ghost Xinhuang".

But you think Abe Seimei is more likely to soften his heart than Ashiya Michimitsu.

"So you're still going to be moved by other people's hearts."

Abe Seimei replied: "But this is exactly the human heart."

You don't understand people's hearts, and even drift away from immortality.The human heart is difficult to understand, and the immortal way is far away. Only this love is the existence that you can feel very clearly and have really obtained. This love that died young is like a burning flame, and the embers still remain in your chest. Beats like a heart.

You can hold Abe Seimei's hand when your consciousness is chaotic, stick to his cheek and lips and ask him if he loves you, but after you really wake up, you can't say a word like that at all.

Because you are terrified of it.

You're afraid that you really won't be able to tell the difference - because they are so alike, you won't be able to tell who you "love" really are.

However, such fear only arises for a brief moment when the eyes are opened.

No matter how much you questioned and refused to give up when you were in chaos, Abe Seimei never asked you half a sentence.

He never asked you half a sentence about that person when you were awake.

Abe Seimei will only look at you with gentle and focused eyes like that person.

However, compared to that person—the one who is always worried about the family, the court, the Holy One, and busy with affairs, Abe Seimei only looks at your time, which makes you feel in a trance.

You go out to enjoy the flowers together in spring, and in the scorching summer, dragonflies land on your hair in the garden...

"Who am I?"

When he hugged you from behind and asked you this question, you leaned in his arms, turned your face sideways, and reached out to stroke his chin.

He asks you again: "Who are you looking at?"

You couldn't help feeling in a trance, and there was some hesitation in it.

"Seimei," you said to him, "only you."

……

……

"lie."

Abe Seimei said softly.

You leaned over to kiss him, hugged his head, and stroked his face.