Case File Compendium

Xie Qingcheng will eventually go to the United States.

Xie Xue's physical condition was not good after the physical examination. She was hit too hard. The doctor said that she had obvious anxiety during pregnancy, and the symptoms were very serious.If Xie Qingcheng didn't cooperate at this time, she might really be unable to hold on.

Since the age of 14, Xie Qingcheng has never lived for himself.

Even now that the case has come to light, his fate does not seem to have changed.

Because the formalities were all handled by the people of the Wei family, they were done very quickly. Soon after Xie Qingcheng was discharged from the hospital, he was about to leave the country for treatment.The week before leaving, Chen Slow made an appointment with him.

Chen Man was also seriously injured in the naval battle and spent more than a month in the hospital before recovering.

The meeting place he originally sent to Xie Qingcheng was the vegetarian restaurant they had been to, but after receiving the news, Xie Qingcheng replied a few minutes later that he should change the place, so he made a new appointment at a Zen teahouse .

Chen Man arrived first, and after waiting in the house for a while, Xie Qing came.When Chen Man turned his head and saw him, even though he was prepared in his heart, he was still taken aback, and then everything felt bad.

"elder brother……"

It's just that I haven't seen him for more than a month, and Xie Qingcheng looks as if he is more than ten years older.

His previous demeanor was very sharp, very hard and cold, and there was a cold vigor in every gesture.But now, the bleak and cold look in his brows is still there, but the ruthlessness that supported him seems to have disappeared.This made him look very tired, sick, haggard, and his whole body showed some abnormal paleness, like a ghost who was reluctantly kept in the world.

When Xie Qingcheng and Chen Man sat together before, although the age difference could be seen, it was not so disparate that people could see it.

Now it is very obvious.

Xie Qingcheng sat down in front of him, Chen Man stared at him for a long time, before he could speak, his eye circles turned red, he turned his face to the side, held back his tears, and then looked at him again.

Xie Qingcheng: "I've been waiting for a long time."

"Not too long..."

"Healed?"

"Ah."

"That's good."

The dialogue between the two was very strange, as if there was an invisible film blocking them.

In the end, Chen Man couldn't bear it anymore, and broke the film—touched the content that was almost taboo for the two of them: "Brother... I'm sorry... If, if I know that he is not from Duan Wen's side... Man, then I will definitely not..."

"The person who killed him was not you, not your teammates. Not you. You were just acting according to the law." Xie Qingcheng leaned back on the chair, folded his arms, and looked at Chen Man with a pair of eyes—even though one of them was gone With any focus, nothing can be seen.

He said, "I was the one who killed him."

Chen Man: "No, brother...don't think so..."

Xie Qingcheng lowered his eyelashes, as if he didn't want to continue this topic anymore.

A cup of hot tea was steaming in front of the two of them, silently overflowing with steam.

Chen Man wiped away his tears: "Brother, your eyes..."

"You are the last to see him." Xie Qingcheng didn't care about his eyes, but said this to Chen Man suddenly.

Chen Man: "...um."

Another few seconds of silence.

Then Xie Qingcheng asked: "Then what happened to him in the end... Can you tell me about it."

Chen Man didn't answer, and after a while, a tear fell on the table in front of him.

In the end, He Yu looked up to the sky and laughed, his expression was crazy and sad. Anyone could see his desperation at that time, and he even asked Chen Slow to shoot him dead with his own hands.The appearance of Chen Slow made him give up his last desire to survive. He felt that Xie Qingcheng did it so decisively to protect Chen Slow.

In the last few seconds, He Yu's eyes were filled with sadness and hatred.

But how did Chen Man tell Xie Qingcheng?

Xie Qingcheng had already lost one eye and had become so dilapidated, how could Chen Man stick a sharp knife in his heart.

Sometimes silence is an answer.

Xie Qingcheng closed his eyes.

Chen Man said sadly: "Brother...you...really like him, don't you?"

"..."

"I used to think that you were forced to be with him, or that you had to be with him for some reason, but..." Chen Man didn't continue talking, tears falling down one by one.

Xie Qingcheng didn't say he liked it, nor did he say he didn't like it.

what do you like...

Is it the feelings of someone like him who cannot give He Yu 100% trust?

He has seen true love, in that kind of love, he has seen the warmest eyes in the world, heard the most sincere confession in the world, and received the protection that he is the only one in the world.

In that love, he has seen what it means to have no complaints and no regrets, what it means to be moths to the flame, what it means to be infatuated, and what it means to be unswerving.

None of that was his.

He has never given He Yu anything, how can he say he likes it?

Chen Man looked into his eyes anxiously: "Brother...don't do this again...after you go to the United States, you must treat your illness well...OK? The investigation and pursuit of Duan Wen is not over yet, the biggest one The black hand hasn't been brought to justice yet, I want...I want you to watch with your own eyes the murder of my uncle and aunt, my elder brother...and...and that organization of He Yu, who can bring all the members to justice, Get what you deserve."

"I know, it may take a long time, but one day, you will be able to see... as long as you are still alive."

Chen Man paused, and then said: "Brother, did you know that in the latest investigation, they discovered the truth about Yi Beihai's murder...Even Yi Beihai was seized by Duan Wen and used it to test the newest obedient man." The experimental product of water effect! He went to the casino at that time and drank a glass of wine. He was not so determined to kill Mr. Qin, but there was something in that glass of wine... that version of obedient water. It failed, Wei Rong confessed that Duan Wen originally ordered him to seek revenge for his mother and threatened Qin Ciyan to force him to reveal the secret of a research report, but Yi Beihai accidentally missed it..."

Xie Qingcheng knew what secret report they wanted.

——The first emperor.

Yi Beihai originally had the idea of ​​killing the doctor, Duan Wen used him, and others couldn't see the mystery behind it.

If it were before, Xie Qingcheng would undoubtedly be shocked by the revelation of this layer of truth, but now he just accepts this fact-he seems to no longer be surprised by anything, happy by anything, and Arouse any emotion for anything.

He is just a dead wood, everything in it is empty and rotten.

"Brother, Duan Wen will stand in front of the trial bench and be convicted one day. I hope...you can hold on to see that day."

"I know you must be very sad to lose He Yu, but...you still have Xie Xue, and your nephew who is about to be born, and you still have..." He looked at him with eyes like a rabbit, hesitated for a while, and drummed Gathering up the courage to continue, "——you and me. We also need you very much, and we can't live without you."

Xie Qingcheng finally spoke: "I understand what you mean."

Chen Man: "...Brother..."

Xie Qingcheng said: "Chen Man, I may have never loved anyone in my life. Maybe I have never loved He Yu either. Because people like me have no right to say whether they like it or not."

Chen Man: "..."

"But as I said, no one can replace his position." Xie Qingcheng said, "It was like this in the past, and it will not change in the future. Life or death, that place will always belong to him. It belongs only to him .”

"Until the day I leave too."

Chen Man's eyelashes filled with tears.

Xie Qingcheng stood up and called the waiter to pay the bill. Before leaving, he said something to Chen Man.

He said: "Chen Yan, I'm not worth your nostalgia. Go ahead, you'll meet someone much better than me. And me." After a pause, "I've put the one who loves me the most People were killed by their own hands. All the time in the future is the price I should pay."

He left and returned to Moyu Lane alone.

On the way, Xie Qingcheng came across a stall selling small noodles.

Now that autumn is getting deeper and the Mid-Autumn Festival is coming soon, traditional old craftsman's traveling shops have begun to appear in the streets and alleys hiding from the urban management.

At the old craftsman’s stall, seven or eight kinds of dough figurines have been prepared with Coke bottles, including the most common Monkey King, Chang’e, Pleasant Goat, and Doraemon...Xie Qingcheng looked at the dough figurine booth, as if I'm watching a fantasy dream.

"Sir, what do you want to buy?"

Waking up in a trance, it was an old craftsman talking to him.

Xie Qingcheng found that he had walked in front of the other party unconsciously: "...can you pinch a dragon?"

"Okay." The old man smiled kindly, and his wrinkles were full of tenderness accumulated over the years, "Then what do you want to pinch?"

"Two dragons, one red and one silver. Put them together."

The old man said thoughtfully: "Someone has asked me about such a request before..."

Xie Qingcheng's hands in the windbreaker pockets were slightly curled up, he didn't even need to ask, he already knew who had made the same wish with a smile in front of this stall.

Controlling the tremor in his voice, he said, "Really..."

"That's New Year's Eve..." The old man remembered, smiling, "He's a very handsome young man."

Xie Qingcheng's voice choked up for the first time, and he said, "Please do as you were then, because..."

He sorted out his emotions before saying the second half of the sentence: "Because that pair of little dragons was given to me."

The old man was surprised, but also very happy: "Then is it still there?"

Xie Qingcheng seemed to have a bitter olive in his throat, he said softly: "...I lost it."

Xiaolong was ready, exactly the same as the one He Yu gave him on New Year's Eve. Xie Qingcheng took the bamboo stick, and the hand holding the bamboo stick was trembling slightly.

In the end, he thanked the old man solemnly, and put the little face man in his windbreaker pocket, at the place closest to his heart—he took it home.

The day before leaving the country, Xie Qingcheng went to complete the last thing in the country.

He went to the cemetery alone.

He Yu has no relatives in China, and no one will erect a monument for him, except Xie Qingcheng.

The stele has been placed, and on this day, the undertaker is waiting for the customer to lay the remains of the deceased.

But Xie Qingcheng did not have He Yu's remains.

The relics found by the police are only broken limbs and flesh, let alone handed over to him, he is not anyone from He Yu.Not a family member, not a friend...not a lover.

All he has is the pair of little mud dragons.

He packed it in a nanmu box and put it gently in the grave.The undertaker had seen all kinds of weird widows, so he didn't ask any more questions, and cooperated with him to seal the tomb.

"Sir, this is the tool you asked for." After sealing the tomb, the undertaker handed the lettering knife to Xie Qingcheng.

There is no writing on the tombstone, it is empty.

The guest who ordered the stele said from the very beginning that they didn't need them to carve anything, and only asked them to bring him the chisel knife.

Such a request is not an isolated case. Some people would like to personally engrave the name of the deceased on the stele, as if they could enter the hearts of the living at this very moment.

Xie Qingcheng took the knife.

"Thank you."

The undertaker bowed slightly and left, leaving the last time to this pair of people who were separated by life and death.

Xie Qingcheng slowly knelt down in front of the cold tombstone, touching the blank white jade with his fingers.He didn't shed any tears, and it seemed that his eyes that had lost their light could no longer shed tears.

He said, "Brat."

"I'm leaving."

"I know you blame me. It's my fault...I've been treating you cruelly...I always hope that you can be well alone and walk out of the shadows alone, but I forgot that you need a bridge...and I didn't put That bridge is for you."

"You hate me. You should blame me."

His forehead was pressed against the bone-chilling monument.

Xie Qingcheng whispered softly, and his voice was scattered in the wind: "I'm sorry. You told me that you like me so many times, but I never told you once, kid, in fact, I also..."

He stopped.

me what?

It seems that I am no longer qualified to speak.

Xie Qingcheng closed his eyes.After a long time, he swallowed the unspeakable words, those invisible words seemed to have cut his throat, he coughed, and the faint smell of blood was in his lungs.

"...I won't live for too long." He said softly, "In the last few years, after sorting out the teacher's books, I should come to see you."

"I don't know if you would still like to see me at that time."

Xie Qingcheng's fingers stroked the stele lightly, as if he had stroked He Yu's forehead.

"I'm sorry...for making you fall in love with someone like me..."

"In the end, I can't give you anything..."

"I'm making you sad..."

He slowly sat up straight, grasped the knife, looked at the empty stele, and was about to chisel He Yu's name on it... But at the moment when the knife was dropped, for some reason, he suddenly remembered He Yu secretly carried him behind his back to get a tattoo when he was a child, and then he was discovered again.

At that time, He Yu yelled, "I didn't learn from you! I don't like you at all! I don't admire you at all!"

In fact, he was never worthy of He Yu's worship.

He Yu did better than him.

He was much better than all of them...

Xie Qingcheng closed his eyes, stroked the stone tablet with his pale and long fingers, and chiseled the first stroke...

The sun was setting, and when the far bell rang, he was kneeling in the dust on the ground. His arm was injured and half disabled, and only one could use all his strength. It was very difficult to engrave words, and his fingers were stained with blood. .

He didn't care, just looked at the lines of newly engraved words.

Nothing of him that do th fade.

But doth suffer sea-change.

Into something rich and strange.

The hand wrapped around the epitaph of Keats, engraved Shelley's last words for He Yu, which could not be left on the wrist during his lifetime, as if to end a bad relationship and regret that had been planted since childhood.

Xie Qingcheng drooped his eyelashes, the black eyelashes were like withered butterfly wings, unable to lift them up in the bloody twilight.

He raised his hand and pasted the cold tablet.

"Little devil... let me hug you again..."

"The last time."

Please, let me give you that hug you longed for before, okay... He Yu... let me give you a hug, okay?

The hard and cold stone tablet was pasted on his heart. The moment he completely closed his eyes, what he thought of was the figure from the back of the ferris wheel dream that never looked back...

Really cold.

But he touched his forehead lightly and hugged her for a long, long time.

He was wondering if it was the same when He Yu hugged him before, like hugging a piece of ice or stone that would never respond, kissing frost and snow.

It was so cold, and now it was finally his turn to experience it.He just hugged it for such a limited time, and he felt numb in his limbs and cold in his chest.

How did He Yu persist for so long, persisting in waiting for no response, day after day, until the day of his death...

Xie Qingcheng really wanted to ask that boy why.

He wanted to catch up with He Yu's footsteps in front of the Ferris wheel, to catch up and not let him disappear.catch up--

Ask if it's worth it.

Let me ask you, kid, at that time... how sad you were when you pleaded with me again and again but got no response.

Ask me why you have to get up staggeringly, and then follow me forward, until your head is broken and bloody, until the oil is exhausted and the lamp is dry.

Let me ask you, He Yu... He Yu... Why are you so persistent and refuse to stop?

Why……

To do this for someone like me...

But the boy is gone, and the blood of worship will never come back.

Only this nameless monument, accompanied him in the gradually sinking sunset, faced death with silence.

Yes, the stele is nameless, except for that poem, Xie Qingcheng left nothing behind.

Just like the relationship between them, life and death are entangled, but they are always nameless.

The last thing Xie Qingcheng left behind was only a little mottled blood on his fingertips, but he wiped it carefully before leaving, and even this little redness disappeared.

Tombstones are clean.

Just like the gentle and beautiful eyes when the boy laughed.

Those eyes seem to be saying, Xie Qingcheng, Doctor Xie...Brother Xie, give me a hug, okay?

I'm young, but I really love you, please believe me.

I did not lie to you……

Xie Qingcheng knelt in front of the tomb, the setting sun finally completely sank from the horizon, he hunched over in the last blood, and slowly closed his eyes.

In the sky, there are faint crows mocking and whimpering, and the last ray of light tremblingly slips down the clouds amidst the cry of blood, falling like tears, and disappearing in an instant.

The next day, Xie Qingcheng was leaving.

Many people came to see him off at the airport, Chen Man, Aunt Li, the dean, the Wei family... even Li Ruoqiu also came, she had divorced her later husband, and now she opened a very romantic small house by herself. In the tavern, she saw the news on the TV in the tavern. Like the general public, she didn't know too much about what Xie Qing told them, but combined with various past events, she also guessed a little.

Li Ruoqiu was the last one to say goodbye to Xie Qing.

She didn't say anything, just looked at his face and shed a line of tears in a daze.In just such a short year, Xie Qingcheng lost the light in his left eye, lost his healthy arm, lost his vigor, and lost an irreplaceable person...

But he still had to live.

She looked at him and could hardly recognize him. He was still the same Xie Qingcheng, but he was already damaged beyond recognition.

She choked up and said, "Brother Xie, I hope everything will be fine for you in the future..."

He looked at her and said, "You too. I hope you are well too."

Li Ruoqiu: "What I did in the past was too naive, I hope you can forgive me."

"You just want normal feelings, but I didn't give them to you." Xie Qingcheng said, "I did not do well. I hope you can forgive me."

Li Ruoqiu wiped her tears and looked at him. She felt that the expression he said made her very sad. In fact, his life was almost dead, and the effect of going to the United States for treatment was unknown. Maybe it would not be able to achieve the desired result. He was With the thought that we might not see each other again in the future, I spoke to her the last time.

Xie Qingcheng said goodbye to them, entered the customs, and he went abroad, but the luggage he packed was less than the simplest trip. There was only one box with some clothes and some unfinished notes...

And the little Charmander that He Yu had given him, he glued it back together and put it in his windbreaker pocket.

At the moment when the plane soared into the sky, he closed his eyes, raised his hand and lightly touched the place where his heart was, and touched the lifeless little dragon.

He opened his eyes and looked out the window. Clouds flowed past the cabin, like a river entering the sea—everything about his past, all his obsessions...

In the end, it all went with the wind.