Case File Compendium

He Yu is a very smart person.

But sometimes, he is too stubborn to turn easily.

For example, if he once believed that he was a straight man, then he would stubbornly think that the answer was correct, and Xie Qingcheng was just a small mistake on his way to the correct answer.

Only now did he realize that perhaps Xie Qingcheng was the correct answer.

The fault was himself.

He Yuzheng was stiff on the bed because of his astonishing discovery, and was so shocked that Xie Qingcheng had already thrown his clothes on him.

"Get up quickly."

"..." He Yu didn't come back to his senses at all, obediently dressed according to his request, his eyes were completely empty.

After he put on his clothes, he got out of bed and stared blankly at Xie Qingcheng for a long time. Seeing that Xie Qingcheng was getting hairy, he murmured: "Brother Xie... I... can I stay a little longer... ..."

Xie Qingcheng had no idea that his heart was falling apart at this moment, and he took He Yuzhen's flustered plea as willfulness.

So he said, "No."

"Xie Qingcheng..."

Xie Qingcheng didn't want to admit and recall what they did on New Year's Eve, and insisted on driving him away. In the end, his face turned pale and his lips turned blue.

"If you really want me to have a good rest, you can leave."

"He Yu, you are torturing me by staying here."

"You go."

"But..." He Yu didn't know what he wanted to say, he wanted to grab Xie Qingcheng's hand in a hurry, as if it would be easier to figure out the crux of the problem.

However, as soon as Xie Qingcheng's burning fingers were touched by him, he instinctively withdrew them immediately.

He Yu: "..."

Because Xie Qingcheng endured the discomfort and fever in his body, when he looked at He Yu, his peach blossom eyes were slightly stained with a sickly red.

He pushed He Yu out.

"This kind of thing can't happen between us anymore. Go back and be quiet."

"But Xie Qingcheng, I want to be with you..."

"Leave me alone, too."

After Xie Qingcheng said this to him, he was about to close the door when Aunt Li just walked out.

"Xiao Xie, it's the first day of the new year, why did you wake up so early with your friend?"

Xie Qingcheng pulled his collar subconsciously.

But the marks on his neck are still too obvious, and there are still several spots of light red exposed outside.

Seeing Li Miaoqing approaching, He Yu suddenly raised his hand, took off the milk coffee-colored scarf that was slanted around his neck, and looped it around Xie Qingcheng's neck.The cashmere scarf was very soft, and it immediately covered Xie Qingcheng's exposed position.

Xie Qingcheng didn't know the situation, and just wanted to break free when He Yu pulled him over by pulling the scarf.

"Don't pick it off. I'll cover the hickey for you."

After hearing this, Xie Qingcheng realized that there were traces of himself even in such an upper position. He didn't know whether it was annoyed or helpless, but he could only wrap around He Yu's scarf and not move.

Li Miaoqing stopped in front of them, sleepy-eyed: "Hey, did you two quarrel last night? Everyone heard the sound of smashing things."

"...No." Xie Qingcheng said.

He Yu: "Auntie, let's watch videos. War movies."

"Oh..." Li Miaoqing yawned after hearing what they said.

Xie Qingcheng: "You got up so early today."

"Yeah, I didn't know what happened last night. I always dreamed of your home decoration, banged, loud, the sound was still real ... As a result, I woke up early."

He Yu: "..."

Xie Qingcheng: "..."

"It's all up, why don't you come to Auntie's house for breakfast?"

"No." Xie Qing said, he is feeling very uncomfortable now, to be honest, he only had time to take a quick shower this morning, some things were not completely cleaned, and he still had a fever, and his body was laziness and fever , I just want to let He Yu go quickly, while Xie Xue is still with Li Ruoqiu, I can take a good wash, and then take medicine and sleep.

So he said to Aunt Li: "He has something urgent, he has to go home."

Aunt Li: "Oh, Xiaohe is leaving now?"

He Yu didn't want to leave.

Xie Qingcheng said, "Yes."

Seeing that He Yu was still standing there, stunned, with no intention of leaving, he gritted his teeth and said, "I'll see him off."

After speaking, he took the car keys, pulled He Yu out of Moyu Lane, stuffed He Yu into his car, and got into the driver's seat by himself.

He Yu regained his composure a little, and looked at him with slightly red eyes: "Brother Xie, you are not feeling well, I should come..."

"Stop talking nonsense."

Xie Qingcheng buckled up his seat belt, started the engine, and silently drove He Yu to the nearby three-dimensional parking lot.

Parking is not easy in the old town, so if He Yu parks for a long time, he will usually park here.

Xie Qingcheng: "Get out of the car."

If it was in the past, He Yu would definitely not have cared about how Xie Qingcheng felt. He would stay as long as he wanted, and leave as long as he wanted. His own happiness and anger were the most important thing.

But at this moment, he was uneasy.

He Yu's mind was buzzing, and he finally got out of the car under Xie Qingcheng's tired and tough gaze.

Xie Qingcheng: "Wait a minute."

He Yu's eyes lighted up slightly, as if a beacon of hope was lit in his eyes.

Xie Qingcheng: "Here is the scarf."

"..."

The lights in He Yu's eyes went out again.

He opened his mouth and wanted to say something, but before he could say anything, Xie Qingcheng had already thrown the scarf to him, then closed the car window, kicked the accelerator violently, and endured his abdomen, waist... all over his body. Feeling uncomfortable up and down, he turned around and went back, leaving Heyu standing alone in a daze.

He Yu struggled for a long time before silently finding his own car and getting in.

It is a very beautiful and comfortable Lambo, but sitting in it does not feel as real as sitting in Xie Qingcheng's co-pilot.

He didn't want to go home at all...he didn't want to go back to the tomb...so he just walked around the streets of the old city in a daze.

He kept thinking about what happened last night, what happened before, the giant beast in his chest that just learned his name, and... the "like" that he couldn't digest for a while.

His whole heart was in a mess.

There was no one on the road at the beginning of the year. He Yu drove the car from day to night. Finally, he parked the car on the side of a deserted road, turned on the stereo, and lay on the seat with his eyes open in the eternity of my heart, thinking about the past. One after another, the past is like a tide, rising over his heart.

Does he really like Xie Qingcheng?

Since when?

does he love him

But what is the source of that love?

Did you fall in love with his body?Is it because like attracts like?Or has he unknowingly fallen in love with Xie Qingcheng's body and mind?

He Yu was stunned, confused, and confused, trying to carefully review what happened in the past.

-

He thought of Xie Qingcheng who took the initiative to press him down and kiss him on the bed last night.

He thought of Xie Qingcheng who was in the reservoir, lying on his back on the water, telling him all the truth in singing.

He thought of Xie Qingcheng, who was under the flower tree and could only take the opportunity of acting to wear the police uniform that he could never really put on.

He thought of Xie Qingcheng who lit a cigarette in the cave of Neverland, and said lightly that he didn't remember what the dream was.

He Yu thought of Xie Qingcheng's stubborn eyes in the clubhouse, after the onset of medicinal wine, he still held on, looking at him so stubbornly.He said--

"He Yu, you come back with me. I can tell you whatever you want to know."

But it was on that day...the night when he and Xie Qingcheng fell in love with Xie Qingcheng for the first time, the night when Xie Qingcheng struggled to save him...he poured a glass of red wine and poured it all out in a humiliating way... On Xie Qing's snow-white skirt.

He Yu remembered that he had put down the wine glass, and through the dim light and the wide table, he tricked him into pulling the hook, and touched his face with a smile.

Then he said: "You lied to me so badly, do you think I will still believe you?"

Yes, Xie Qingcheng lied to him and abandoned him.

But he didn't know that Xie Qingcheng's body was so broken that he couldn't even bear his own emotions...but he gave him the last light.

He Yu remembered that Xie Qingcheng had been telling him all along, to be calm, to overcome his inner demons, and to rely on himself to get out of the shadows in his heart.

This is the only gift that Xie Qingcheng can give to the same kind as the No. [-] Spirit Ebola, and it is also the last gift.

He was the one who told He Yu that mental patients should be treated equally.

It was he who told He Yu to find a bridge to reconnect with society.

It was he who said to He Yu, kid, you have to be strong.

Therefore, He Yu tried his best to grow into a young man who seemed not much different from ordinary people, and he even wanted to convey this idea to every patient who was in deep pain.

Just because Xie Qingcheng once said that the life of a mentally ill person is no different from that of a normal person.

The He family has a nursing home, and it's just a small piece of meat from the big consortium. He Jiwei doesn't care about it, and gives it to He Yu to practice.He Yu turned the nursing home into a semi-charity, giving the greatest help to the many people with psychological problems who came to ask for help.

Just because Xie Qingcheng once said that cages are reserved for prisoners, not for patients who have already suffered too much pain.

After Xie Qingcheng left, he once faltered, and then stood up staggeringly, insisting on wanting to return to a normal social group. He hadn't hurt himself for a long time, and he tried his best to restrain his emotions. The utility knife attached to his wrist was discarded by him in the old days.

It's just because Xie Qingcheng once asked him, kid, don't you feel pain...

you……

Doesn't it hurt...

Did you plant the seeds of admiration from then on?

Did he not only love Xie Qingcheng's body, but also fell in love with that person's soul?

What is that person's soul like... He only listened to it before, but didn't fully enter his heart.

At this moment, He Yu was breathing heavily, and the tattoo on his wrist, which was imitated by Xie Qingcheng, seemed to have turned into a guiding black ribbon at this moment, guiding him to keep going... He followed the ribbon.

The ribbon drifted away, the fog cleared, and Xie Qingcheng was in front of him, which He Yu could see more clearly than anyone else at this moment.

Those who sleep forever here are famous in the water book...

The young man finally tried to empathize with the man, and he finally found the back of Xie Qingcheng in his heart... He saw that it was such a person, the one who gave him faith, helped him, and gave him blood all over... people with experience in overcoming mental Ebola.

He saw the man suppressing the pain, calmly, ruthlessly, and decisively said: "The life of a mental patient is not as important as that of a doctor."

Is it two-faced and three-handed?

No.

no.

He Yu already understood that it was the deepest despair.

Deepest guilt.

He Yu finally knew that Xie Qingcheng, who he had hated so deeply in the clubhouse, was actually asking Qin Ciyan—teacher, why is my life more important than yours.

He seemed to hear Xie Qingcheng saying——

I am a patient.

I am a corpse you pieced together from a pool of blood.

You are the unparalleled scholar of the country, the master of the apricot forest, you have a wife, a daughter, you have unfinished writings, and you have unfinished dreams.

Why did you tell those people that they should call you first if something goes wrong?

Why are you standing in front of me?

He Yu suddenly understood everything, could see everything...

From a third-person perspective, he saw the old man looking at Xie Qingcheng, seeing that the old man was silent and smiling, just like every time he saw Xie Qingcheng expressing doubts and confusion in the past, he looked at him silently and tolerantly .

He Yu remembered that in the studio reservoir, Xie Qingcheng once told him that the old man was getting older, his heart was getting softer, and his temper was getting better.

If it hadn't been for Yi Beihai's knife stabbing his flesh and blood, he would have spent his old age peacefully with his wife, and Xie Qingcheng could have brought him a bouquet of lilies and put them in a rattan basket in the study when he visited him.

But later, Xie Qingcheng was no longer qualified to present a bouquet of flowers in front of the old man's grave.

Xie Qingcheng looked at his monument from afar, and was about to be chased away by his juniors and sisters.

But He Yu knew that he had never regretted it.

——This is the soul of Xie Qingcheng.

When a man mechanically utters those piercing sentences, he is pushing himself into the abyss.

He hated those so-called weak people who kidnapped doctors and asked them to die for their patients. He was worried that those naive, reckless, and overly kind brothers and sisters didn't know how to protect themselves.

In other words, they dare not say, "Can doctors be protected, because a doctor's life is also a life, and a doctor is also a person, and also has a family, a wife and children, a daughter and a mother. Can you not praise us, but force us to He deserves this praise with blood."

He felt that things should not be like this.

So he sacrificed his reputation and buried his career.

——This is the soul of Xie Qingcheng.

He paid the price, just like Qin Ciyan protected him, he protected those white-clothed, tired, busy, enthusiastic people with ideals behind him.

For a long time, He Yu thought that Xie Qingcheng hated patients and was afraid of them.

But what he hates is actually himself.

He Yu didn't know that he had always respected the mentally ill and protected those who were tortured both psychologically and physically, and Xie Qingcheng was one of them.

It was the one closest to him.

——This is the soul of Xie Qingcheng.

Like it……

Like it……

Such a person, such a heart, such a soul...

The giant beast in his chest had a name, and it was circling crazily in his heart.

He seemed to use the eyes of this strange beast to overlook the man who was pointing fingers coldly in the hospital at that time, and saw that man and Qin Ciyan's transparent soul looking at each other from a distance, surrounded by ancient water elves , from the years in Brooklyn, to the present.

Then Qin Ciyan turned around. The old man put his hands in the pockets of his white coat and walked slowly. With a thick stack of books, he looked at the water elves flying in the sky with a smile, and finally turned around and smiled brightly at Xie Qingcheng, who was unable to catch up with him.

"Xiao Xie, I don't need any reason to save you, because I know you will do what I want to do, if you live, I will live too."

"You are my sustenance, my child, my apprentice, and my comrade-in-arms. You are my hope. I am old, and old people always have to leave. The old leaves should be protected New leaves fall. In the past, my masters also sacrificed their time, their hard work, and then I was born."

The setting sun in Brooklyn fell and shone on the young man. The smiling young man in a European-style suit waved to him, and then disappeared into the golden splendor.

He Yu saw Xie Qingcheng stop.

Do not catch up.

Xie Qingcheng's footsteps stopped.

Dr. Xie watched Dr. Qin disappear little by little, like looking at the cold corpse of his parents on a rainy night. The sky was like an arrowhead, like a rainstorm, like fireworks, like the light cast by that person all his life, shining on his face at this moment, His expression was instantly shattered, and he stood stiffly.stood for a long time.

He Yu knew that Xie Qingcheng couldn't go to Brooklyn.

He has to go back.He must look back.

So, Dr. Xie raised his hand, silently and mercilessly, put on the mask named "betrayer", "coward", and "deserter".Turn around and look back at the other person.Sad, resolute, and determined eyes came out from behind the mask.

He walked back, in the opposite direction from Qin Ciyan.

He walked into the endless night.

From the flames burning his body to the blade cutting his heart, he walked with great firmness step by step.

He Yu watched... Through the eyes of the strange beast, he finally saw all this so clearly, every step Xie Qingcheng took seemed to be knocking on his heart.

——This is the real Xie Qingcheng.

He Yu knew Xie Qingcheng.

like.like.

He likes this person's body, this person's heart, he likes this person's scars, and he loves his sick body.

like.

like……

This giant beast made him see everything, everything about himself, everything about Xie Qingcheng so clearly——

So, at the end of the long night, before dawn.

The boy finally faced the fragile and light morning hoarsely.

Muttering belatedly, he said, "Xie Qingcheng..."

"Are... don't you feel pain..."

Xie Qingcheng, don't you feel pain...

these years.

Do you hurt?

You...are you alone...