Difficult to return

[I was too emotional that day, and I also had a breakdown. I said a lot of ugly things, which should have hurt you. 】

[I don't know if there is any subtext in the words you asked.Too many people are full of prejudice and malice towards my profession, always trying to belittle or even insult me, so when you say that, I subconsciously feel that you think the same way, and my emotions are a little out of control. 】

[I'm sorry for saying so many hurtful things. 】

Lu Mingchen rubbed the smooth screen of the phone with his thumb, propped his head with the other hand, and read several messages from his husband over and over again.He actually came to apologize to himself, does it mean that he didn't dislike himself in the phone that much?

[I just don't understand, since you know that other people are full of prejudice and malice towards such a profession, why do you do this?I don't think you are in financial difficulties, and your performance level can also try some formal stages. 】

[I mean a stage that is more visible and accepted by the public. 】

I don't know if this question is too difficult to answer, or my husband doesn't want to answer it, but I haven't replied for a long time.

Lu Mingchen wondered if what he had said was too much for people to ignore, and was about to say something else. When he bypassed this issue that could not be reconciled either in reality or on the Internet, he saw that the person on the other side was typing .

[Maybe I want to get some recognition. 】

[Identify? 】

[I'm a man, but I like to wear women's clothes.In daily life, many people would find this weird and ridiculous, wouldn't they?At least on this stage, at least at this moment on the stage, not only will everyone not be surprised, but they will applaud for it. 】

[Even if they don't really appreciate your dancing and singing, or really agree with your hobby of women's clothing? 】

[Even if they are not. 】

Lu Mingchen frowned deeply, and fell silent completely.

The husband is obsessed with women's clothing to such an extent, how can he be changed?If he can't change, can he really accept it completely?Stage performances are barely enough. If you want to accept your husband wearing skirts and bras in real life, just thinking about it will make Lu Mingchen feel his scalp numb and feel a chill.

Seeing that he didn't reply anymore, the other person seemed a little anxious and kept typing, but after a while, a new message came.

[You also think it's weird and ridiculous for men to wear women's clothes, don't you? 】

[Honestly speaking, it is not that easy to accept. 】

[Then you are really ridiculous. 】

After saying this sentence, Song Shuhua didn't know what he thought of, and immediately withdrew it.

[No need to withdraw, I have already seen it, it doesn't matter, I admit that I am ridiculous. 】

Lu Mingchen really felt that he was ridiculous.Ever since he discovered that her husband was performing in QUEEN, his rational and correct life path has gradually deviated to a ridiculous track.More than once, he found himself like a clown, looking forward and backward, shrinking, and finally even borrowing someone else's identity to have such an ordinary conversation with his husband who has been married for many years.

[Do you like to wear women's clothes because you think you should be a woman? 】

Finally asked, Lu Mingchen's heart beat a little faster, and he sat upright on the boss's chair, as if waiting for a trial, his vest was slightly sweating.

Sometimes he even thinks to just let it go, if he can't bear the answer, then never know.But he is so eager to know what the real husband is like.

But this time her husband didn't let him suffer for too long, and the other side quickly replied——

【No, I'm a man. 】

The tensed bowstring was suddenly relaxed, and Lu Mingchen's entire back softened, and he supported his chin with his hands.The muscles that had been stretched too tight just now were slightly sore.

He never believed in any ghosts and gods, and he even wanted to say thank God for his absolute materialism, but in the end he didn't drive him into a desperate situation, and he left a little room for him.

[Why does everyone think that I wear skirts just to be a woman?What can a woman do?As long as a man is a little sissy, he will be rejected by the collective, which is enough to see what kind of true attitude this society has towards women.I don't want to be a woman at all. 】

As soon as this topic was mentioned, the husband changed his composure and suddenly became agitated.

[I didn't insist on identifying you as a woman, so don't get excited. 】

[Stop saying I should be a woman in the future.Ever since I was a child, I have been called "sissy", "like a woman", and "born with the wrong gender". I am really disgusted by this.Not wearing women's clothing is a woman, don't be so ignorant. 】

Lu Mingchen frowned.

【From small to large?When you were a child too? 】

[When I was young, I was more like a girl than I am now. I was called a "sissy" by my classmates, and I was bullied on campus throughout my elementary school life.Is it my fault that I look like a girl? 】

Is there really a girl like that?Lu Mingchen didn't think so.At least on weekdays, the husband looks like a handsome and gentle man, with a milder personality and a shyer personality, but he does not have a feminine posture. Anyone who takes a look at him will think that he is a man.

【it's not your fault.I don't think you look like a woman except for acting. 】

Her husband was called a "sissy" when he was a child, and he was even bullied at school. These are things that Lu Mingchen never knew about.

Although he knew it was impossible, he would still think that if he could get to know her husband earlier, when he was a teenager or even a few years old, it would be great, so that he could protect him and prevent him from being hurt, maybe he is now You don't need to seal yourself up like this.

【Sorry, I got too excited all of a sudden. 】

It was only here that Lu Mingchen could roughly feel that what he usually said without much thought, and according to his thoughts, might have caused a lot of harm to her husband.

【It doesn't matter.I will also pay attention to it in the future, and try not to say anything that disgusts you. 】

[I don't know what's going on, but suddenly I can't control myself. 】

[Maybe some emotions have been held in my heart for too long, and I want to vent them out? 】

Lu Mingchen's words seemed to break her husband's mind again, and the other side was silent for a while.

[Maybe it's like this, I've never said these words to anyone else.And you are a stranger, subconsciously confided in you as a tree hole, poured some bad emotions on you. 】

[It's okay, I'm happy to be your tree hole, you can tell me anything you want to talk about. 】

After eight years of marriage, Lu Mingchen has never received any negative emotions from her husband.Song Shuhua in life is always so gentle and kind, never losing his temper, let alone expressing such intense emotions with some sharp language.He didn't even make a sound when he was unhappy, he didn't need anyone to apologize, let alone coax him, he would be fine after a while, and he could laugh again.

Lu Mingchen felt that he was so good-tempered that he was like a dummy, and people could say that their partner had a bad temper, but no one thought that his partner had a good temper.

Having come into contact with the truest side of her husband, Lu Mingchen was so excited that he was even a little grateful, but at the same time felt a little wronged.How he wished that in reality, her husband could also tell him these things.

【If you have any problems in the future, whether you are in trouble and don’t know how to solve it, or you are unhappy, you can tell me.Maybe I can't solve it for you, but it's good to have one more person to listen to. 】

[I said a lot about me today, let’s talk about you too. 】

【What do you want to know about me? 】

[You are not the young man who delivered the cake I met backstage that day, are you? 】

Lu Mingchen was slightly taken aback.After thinking about it for a while, I decided to admit that it would do more harm than good for my husband to mistake him for Tang Chi.

[No, those are my subordinates.How did you know? 】

[It's just a hunch, I feel that you are not that young man. 】

[It's true that it's not that young, but it's not very old either. 】

【Hahaha……】

Lu Mingchen looked at the three "hahaha" in the chat box, did her husband make fun of him?It's actually hard for him to imagine his husband laughing, but no matter what, he will smile heartily.

[Why do you want your subordinates to send it? 】

With this question, Lu Mingchen's mind turned, and he lied casually.

[I know your rules, but I just think that the chances of him being delivered to you are higher. 】

[Is it just like this?My feeling is that you prefer to communicate with me in the dark, you are taking the initiative and I am being passive, this will make you feel more in control? 】

The husband was sharper than he thought, and the fib was caught.

[I just want to chat with you on the Internet like this, I have no intention of getting to know Tita in real life, and I know that you don't want to have a deeper relationship with guests.Does this make you uncomfortable? 】

If the husband wants him to reveal his true identity to a certain extent, then he has no choice but to go offline and delete his account.One day, he will abandon this disguise, but not now when he can calm down and have a few words.

[It's okay, maybe I'm used to being in a passive position like this, as long as you don't do anything bad to me. 】

Seeing these words, Lu Mingchen couldn't help but soften his eyebrows and eyes.

【I don't know how to convince you that I will never do anything bad to you. 】【At least subjectively not.Sometimes people hurt others unconsciously, including before, if you feel unhappy, just say it. 】

The other side suddenly changed the subject.

[Can you tell me why you have to add me as a friend? 】

Lu Mingchen frowned slightly.At that time he had almost no choice, exhausted all the rogue and strong methods, and it did look very weird.

The husband followed up with another sentence.

[You insist on adding me as a friend, but you just want to chat with me online, don't you think your behavior is very unreasonable? 】

He put his fingers on the typing keys, but couldn't type a word.If he doesn't answer this question, will the husband be angry and doubtful, making the atmosphere that has just been eased deadlocked again?

【You are really different from other guests.I don't know why, but I think you give me a very familiar feeling, as if you are not just a guest.And your behavior is really weird, I don't want to take you as a weirdo. 】

Lu Mingchen was sweating from his vest.The husband already understood what he said, and if he didn't explain, then he would be a strange person in the husband's heart.No one would trust a weirdo.But how could he explain his strange behavior?

[Is it related to your lover? 】

Lu Mingchen gritted his teeth.

[Yes, the person I like is a transgender person. 】