HP Margo's Diary

(thirteen)

French summer is here again.

Dachian knocked on my window on his broom the first night of his holiday.

I let him in first, and I carried my clothes to the bathroom to change out of my nightgown.When I returned to the room, he was leaning over to look at the photos I had posted on the wall.

I suddenly became embarrassed, and stood over to block those photos as if to cover up. My face was still a little red, and I pretended to be calm and said, "Let's go, I'm ready."

He suppressed the upward hook of his mouth and nodded, and pretended to be calm, he rode out on the broom first, and then stopped outside the window to wait for me.

We flew in the summer night sky, insects and all the noisy sounds were far away from us, he slowed down, so we could hear each other clearly.

He took me around and then slowly stopped in an open space in front of a wood not far from home.

He said he had just passed his wizarding exams, but he had no idea what he wanted to do after graduation.

"I want to visit many places" he said "there are many beautiful places in this world, I want to visit them all" He noticed that I didn't speak and asked me "What about you?"

"I don't know" I shook my head "I want to apply to a university, but I don't want to leave my grandma"

"University? Will you leave here?" He asked me a little nervously, obviously he just said that he wanted to see many places, but now he is worried that I will leave.

I shook my head to show I don't know, and said "maybe I'd like to open a flower shop"

"Then I can conjure many flowers for you" he smiled, looked at me and said "we can flower shop together"

"But you just said you were going to many places" I teased him

"That doesn't conflict!" He was anxious, "We can open a flower shop in every place we have stayed."

I froze for a moment, I didn't expect him to think so seriously, he really counted me in his future.So my heart began to jump for joy again, and that kind of secret happiness made me unable to bear a smile.

He saw me smiling, so he also smirked along with me. This kind of joy was sucked into our bodies like air, and we sat on the grass with our heads sideways facing each other and smirked non-stop.

As if he suddenly thought of something, he stood up abruptly. "Let's dance," he said with a smile, and he held out his hand to me.

I suddenly thought of the ball he wrote about, where he had told me he didn't like dancing.The boy's secret and obvious mood spread out in front of me all of a sudden, hot and green.I don't know what kind of mood I was in, but almost without hesitation, my hand was handed over to his.

He let go of my hand first, and solemnly invited me, "Miss Roz, would you like to be my dance partner?"

I'm not used to his prudish appearance, he stared at me earnestly with a slight smile, his honey-colored eyes seemed to be filled with the purest and brightest light, and his hand was right in front of me.

I felt the soft and wet touch from our clasped hands, I felt the focused and hot emotion in his eyes, and I felt my heart beating extremely fast.

We danced in our T-shirts, the deserted meadow seemed like a carpeted banquet, the chirping of insects and birds was a symphony of music, the stars and the moon were witnesses, our two hot and green hearts Stick together tightly.

In our line of sight, except for the rotating phantom, there is only each other.We danced for a long time, as if we were reluctant to stop, and those monotonous movements seemed to have infinite fun for us at this time.

In the end we were tired and paralyzed on the grass. I lay on the grass and looked at the moon hanging high in the sky. The bright and soft moonlight shone on my face.

I turned my head to look at him, only to realize that his gaze had been on me.We looked at each other from a short distance, and he moved slightly closer to me, propped himself up and lowered himself down to me, his soft brown curly hair brushed my face slightly itchy.The moment I blinked, the warm touch on my face stayed for a second and then left immediately.

His warm breath still seemed to stay on my face, I widened my eyes and sat up abruptly.

"Margaret, I like you" he whispered next to me

A kind of joy and joy welled up in my heart. Before I opened my mouth, those emotions surged up again. They always reminded me when my heart was beating, reminding me of my insignificance, my ordinaryness, my powerlessness, and my cowardice .They always pull me back to those days, those dark, hopeless days, those days when I hoped for redemption.

I suddenly found that I never seemed to believe that there is something that can stay with me forever. The more beautiful he is, the more I am afraid of losing it.

He saw the look on my face, he was a little hurt and puzzled, he said "you like me, Margaret, I can feel it"

I didn't know what to say, I was silent for a while, in his eyes, I finally said those words——

"We are people of two worlds, Dacian"

"You are a wizard, you will return to your own world one day, you just stay in my world for a while, I am a Muggle, I can't understand what you are saying, and I probably can't understand you You will be bored with your behavior one day." I calmed down my tone and tried to speak calmly.

I put those words out, my concerns, my worries, all the dark parts of me.

I know I'm insulting him, insulting his feelings for me, but I'm also really disturbed by that stuff, and I can't believe he'll stop for me, that he'll always love me so fiercely.I'm not doubting him, I'm doubting myself, how can I, who is selfish and cowardly, deserve him to stay for me.

Rather than trying to keep those quicksands from slipping through my fingers, it would be better if my hands were empty from top to bottom, and I had never owned anything.

He didn't understand my thoughts, but he still urgently explained to me, "I'm a wizard, but that has nothing to do with me liking you, Margaret, no matter who I am, I'm Dacian" he I wanted to approach and hold my shoulder, but I dodged to avoid it.

His hands were frozen in mid-air, and he understood my attitude. "You like me, Marguerite," he emphasized.

I didn't speak, and I clenched my hands tightly behind my back.I don't know what I am fighting against, almost every second, I am regretting, regretting those words.I knew desperately and painfully inside that there was nothing more possible between us.

There was a voice in my heart that wanted me to hug him, but the powerlessness and despair born deep in my heart surged and swallowed up my impulse.

It was the first time I saw such a hurt look on his face,

"Margaret, you're a coward," he said, his voice lowered so that I wouldn't hear his trembling, and he seemed a little depressed.He was silent for a while, then turned and left.

I stayed where I was and still lowered my head, and waited until the sound of his footsteps could no longer be heard, then I covered my heart with trembling hands.A painful sense of tearing came from there, and I felt a powerless emptiness from the bottom of my heart as if I had lost something, and it sadly wanted me to cry.

I stood in that forest for a long time, until I couldn't even hear the sound of insects, and everything was silent.

I picked up the broom and walked stiffly in the deserted darkness. There seemed to be footsteps behind me, but when I turned around to look, I saw only the green leaves that suddenly stopped shaking.When I looked back again, the sound appeared again, but I didn't look back because I felt another breath in this darkness.