Refill with you anytime

Autumn is strong, and the air in the morning and evening is already cool.

The city has four distinct seasons, and the scenery follows the seasons.

The morning wind passed through the window and the ginkgo rustled, sometimes bringing in a few pieces of golden yellow, which fell in the silent sunlight and became the only sound in the quiet ward.

Everyone in the ward was waiting for the battle, and the atmosphere was dignified and solemn.

Ruan Jing was confused and had nothing else to do. He looked again at the time when the operation was approaching, and his brows never loosened.

Conservative treatment continued for a year, but Lin Rong's illness was still ready for surgery.

No matter how small the operation is, there are risks. Although the disease is in the early stage, the risk of gastric cancer surgery is not small.

Everyone in the ward knows in their hearts that if there is a risk, there is a chance of falling into danger.

The entire ward was immersed in the silence before the operation preparation, and everyone's worries became a shadow gathered in their hearts, lingering.

The atmosphere of silence is as real as it is boring.

Lin Rong couldn't bear it any longer, she opened her mouth to break the silence: "What are you doing with this expression, it's just an operation, it made me nervous..."

Zhao Bin relaxed his stern face, walked to the bedside, put the clothes on her body with concern, and tidied her hair awkwardly.

Who knew that Lin Rong was even more helpless: "Look at the indoor temperature, it's so hot..." Then she pulled off her clothes, "I'll come down and take a walk."

Said sitting on the bed.

Ruan Jing squatted down hurriedly, took Lin Rong's shoes, and squatted beside the bed to help her put them on.

The shoes are newly bought slippers. Lin Rong's frame is small, and she has lost weight after a long illness. Her ankles are wrapped in soft and fluffy shoes, making her look even more fragile and slender.

She doesn't look old, even with popular skin care products, her skin is better than her peers, and she looks like there are few signs of aging.

But the hands propped on the side of the bed already have old wrinkles, who can escape the passage of time.

Mother is getting old.

For the first time, this concept was so clear in Ruan Jing's mind.

Since he has a sense of self-reliance, he does not want to integrate into this new family, and also distances himself from his mother.

The young man has unlimited dreams in his heart. He wants to go higher and farther in the field he likes, to go to a wider place, and to have someone who only belongs to him.

He put his head down and worked hard, with excellent skills and the right way, and he was determined to move forward.

On the way to the front, she paused, looking back, the figure of the person closest to her was getting farther and farther away, as if time had slowed down her steps, and it seemed that she had walked with her head buried for too long.

But after looking back, the panic and helplessness became more violent-what should I do if I never see her again?

Thinking of this, the heaviness in his chest became heavier, and he couldn't help lowering his gaze, his eyes turned red.

In the silence, a hand suddenly touched his head gently.

Ruan Jing was taken aback and raised his head.

Lin Rong looked down at him, smiling slightly, the water color in her eyes was full of gentleness and love that had not been seen for a long time.

It's been a long time since there was such a quiet scene.This is the first time in a year that the two have had such intimate contact.

Ruan Jing couldn't hold back, his nose sore: "Mom..."

Lin Rong stared at him deeply for a moment, Ruan Jing felt something in her heart, and sure enough, she said softly, "Xiao Jing, I'm just afraid that you're having a bad time..."

After a year, it is really not the right time to bring up these words again, or at this time.

The more this happened, the more it reminded others that even if Lin Rong pretended to be optimistic, she was still prepared.

Ruan Jing felt a dull pain in his already hanging heart: "Mom, don't mention it after it's over..."

In the past year, the two had a tacit agreement not to mention it, but now Lin Rong made up her mind to finish these words: "I don't think you are different from other children, but I am afraid that the road you chose is too difficult. If the other party I can't bear to leave, what do you do, you have been a stubborn child since you were a child..."

Ruan Jing was stunned for a few seconds, and a soreness followed, welling up in his nasal cavity, and his vision was a little blurred.

He sniffed his nose lightly, held Lin Rong's hand and lowered his gaze.

"Mom, stop talking, wait until you come out..."

He lowered his head, not daring to look at Lin Rong's expression.

The voice above the head was hoarse, and it seemed a bit helpless and sad: "I also want you to have your own family, partner and children, and live happily..."

Ruan Jing pressed Lin Rong's warm and dry hand on his forehead, and tears finally dripped down. Those shells that he thought were cold and hard were shattered, and his throat was so tight that he couldn't speak.

Lin Rong seemed to have finished what she wanted to say, she took a light breath, and the ward fell into silence.

Zhao Bin coughed suddenly, and his tone was pretending to be relaxed: "Hey, I think he is living happily now, and there is no need to impose any conditions..."

Lin Rong kept silent and did not refute.

In the ward full of pure white eyes, even the sunlight became a little bit penetrating, time passed slowly, and I couldn't bear to disturb it.

A few seconds later, Lin Rong moved. He gently wiped Ruan Jing's tears away, and called softly, "Xiaojing..."

Ruan Jing hurriedly looked up at him.

Lin Rong looked at him for a moment, then sighed: "...my name is Xiao Qin, and I'm here too."

As soon as these words came out, Ruan Jing's chest filled with grief froze, and before he could react, his face showed confusion: "...Who?"

Which Xiao Qin?

As if responding to his doubts, just as he finished speaking, there was a polite knock on the door of the ward, and then someone pushed the door open.

Qin Xijue walked in, greeted Lin Rong and Zhao Bin familiarly, and then his eyes fell on Ruan Jing.

Ruan Jing's pupils shrank, his whole body stiffened in shock, and the fingers holding Lin Rong trembled subconsciously, as if he didn't recognize the person in front of him.

What's the situation, why did you suddenly call Qin Xijue over, no, why did the people in the ward react so calmly?

Under Ruan Jing's sluggish gaze, Qin Xijue struggled to maintain his composure, and walked to Lin Rong's bedside.

Lin Rong seemed to be tired of talking, so she gently leaned against the head of the bed: "You have been visiting me for so long, if..." She paused, and then said, "You should also say goodbye."

Qin Xijue shook his head, lowered his voice, and said with a bit of reassurance, "No, you just go in for a while, and you don't need to say goodbye."

Ruan Jing looked at the normal communication among the people in the room, and Qin Xijue even patted Zhao Jie's head...

In the extreme shock, he finally realized belatedly that Qin Xijue had been in contact with them all this year, and he was the only one who didn't know about it.

Lin Rong sighed inwardly.

In fact, she knew that she had long since stopped resisting this child.

In terms of the credit, Zhao Bin must have a share.

Qin Xijue came to visit her, but she ignored people, Zhao Bin was afraid that the atmosphere would be too cold, so he always chatted with people.

She could see that Zhao Bin liked this child very much. Zhao Jie was too young and too naughty, and usually worried a lot. Ruan Jing was even more reluctant to talk to him, and Qin Xijue was mature.

Zhao Bin would ask about his recent situation, and Lin Rong was always forced to listen. As time passed, she began to care about the follow-up.

For example, Qin Xijue was preparing for the exam, and those with excellent grades would be awarded, so did he win the award afterward?

For example, Qin Xijue took the courses for the next few years ahead of time. After a while, she thought to herself, how is she doing?

It wasn't until she realized that this kid was hardworking and excellent, and he couldn't find anything annoying.

Sometimes she also wonders why she likes her own child so much, that kid doesn't want to take care of himself when he's lazy, and even provokes cats and dogs... Qin Xijue is obviously such a quiet and steady person.

...how did it come together?

She also knew that Qin Xijue's visit this year was purposeful at first, no matter how close he was.But adults have sophisticated eyesight due to experience, the other party's sincerity and concern are not fake, and the degree of caring is beyond her expectations.

This child is considerate and polite, stubborn and tolerant.

Most importantly, his own son showed no signs of coming out.

The two of them passed the age of impulsiveness, and were sternly stopped by such a big difficulty, they did not retreat but advanced.

Therefore, she still agreed to Qin Xijue's request to talk.

She suddenly realized that if she left, Qin Xijue was the only person in this world who could be consistent and dedicated to Ruan Jing.

Lin Rong looked at Qin Xijue calmly: "I said that day, I will seriously consider it before replying to you."

Ruan Jing and Qin Xijue were taken aback.

Ruan Jingyun was in a fog, but he vaguely understood that it was an important matter, so he opened his eyes wide: "What answer..."

This answer made Qin Xijue anxious, but at this moment he shook his head lightly: "Auntie, let's talk about it after your operation."

Lin Rong was taken aback for a moment, and then suddenly smiled. For the first time, she had a real smile when she looked at Qin Xijue.

She just thinks this child is stupid, if this answer never has a chance to say it, it will become a thorn in Ruan Jing's life regardless of the answer itself.

Was he confident that he would be fine?

"Don't you really want an answer? If..." It seemed that what she was going to say was unlucky, Zhao Bin was a little nervous immediately, and she could only shake her head helplessly, "I don't agree with you now, your thoughts are independent , I won't be able to control Ruan Jing even if I grow up a bit..."

Qin Xijue's heart sank, his eyes dimmed due to helplessness, and his drooping brows and eyes gradually filled with despair.

Ruan Jing thumped in his heart, lowered his gaze, and didn't want to hear any more.

Lin Rong continued: "So I don't want to worry about it, you can figure it out, if there is still a chance..." She glanced at the two of them, and finally sighed, "You can also try to show me."

Ruan Jing raised his head suddenly, opened his eyes wide, and played back that sentence repeatedly in his mind, and then he bluntly felt unbelievable, followed by soreness in his chest.

Qin Xijue was also stunned, he stood stiffly in the silence of the whole room, as if he didn't think it was real.

In the silence, the door of the ward was suddenly pushed open—the operation should begin.

Joy didn't have time to show up, almost instinctive worry made Ruan Jing hold Lin Rong's hand and didn't want to let go, tears fell silently.

Lin Rong wiped the corners of her eyes, but felt that the weight that had weighed on her heart for a year had disappeared. She patted Ruan Jing on the shoulder angrily.

"Why are you crying! Stand up straight... Hey, what are your expressions?"

Zhao Bin hurriedly stepped forward to support her.

Ruan Jing's fingertips were a little numb, and his legs were also inexplicably numb. With Qin Xijue's firm support, he watched Lin Rong leave the ward surrounded by nurses and doctors.

He hurriedly chased after him, and somehow got to the door of the operating room, until the heavy door was slowly closed, isolating all movement.

Zhao Bin stood in front of the door for a long time before walking over. He patted Ruan Jing on the shoulder: "...it's okay, it will be safe."

As he said that, he had no time to care about others, so he dragged Zhao Jie to wait silently on the chair at the door of the operating room.

Ruan Jinghun stood relentlessly for half an hour, and his fascination slowly returned, only to realize that Qin Xijue was standing silently with him.

He wiped his face, walked to another row of seats and sat down.

The entire corridor fell into waiting silence, the light was dim, and the expressions on everyone's faces were also dim.

Ruan Jing knew that the only thing he could do now was to wait. His confused thoughts finally recovered slowly, and he finally sorted out what Qin Xijue had been doing for the past year.

It turned out that Qin Xijue was the one who really did not comply with the "will of God", did not give up and took action.

In the past year, Qin Xijue has been stuck to stagger the time when he goes home to visit the sick, and he has never wondered where the extra condolences at home come from.

And he seemed to have worked hard in his studies for a year, and his painting skills continued to improve, but he was actually in a daze, escaped and divorced from reality, and only now did he suddenly wake up.

It is the other party who faces the pain and stays awake, and it is the other party who pries out a glimmer of hope when there is no hope.

He always thought that when the one he loved left, his relatives hated him...

And the strength I think is to learn to reconcile with these things with another kind of relieved attitude when I grow up.

Only now did I realize that the person who thought he had left did not leave, and the person who thought he hated him loved him more than he imagined...

These tortures are nothing but derivatives of love, they are the ashes when the turbulent fireworks hit the obstacles, and they are the sunburn after being embraced by the hot sun.

It is meaningless in itself, and has nothing to do with right or wrong, but it is a trace of the former's strong existence.

Ruan Jing was stunned for a while, then glanced at the silent person beside him: "Don't you have anything to say?"

Seeing that he had finally spoken, Qin Xijue held his hand in the dim light: "On the day of graduation, were you saying goodbye to me in your heart? What I said in my heart was - wait for me."

Hearing this, Ruan Jing tightened his fingers and pinched the opponent's hand hard.

Qin Xijue continued in a low voice: "You walked home that day, and I followed you all the way."

The long-lasting discomfort and the palpitations of revisiting the past turned into grievances, Ruan Jing whispered: "What kind of trick are you doing, can't we act together? Even pretending to be a fake breakup, I thought you were really willing... "

Qin Xijue lowered his gaze to look at the overlapping hands of the two, gently twisted his fingertips, and then sighed: "This is a risky thing, you don't have to come together."

Ruan Jing was taken aback for a moment, and immediately understood, subconsciously grasping the opponent's hand tightly, so hard that his fingertips trembled.

Qin Xijue made such a choice because he didn't want to ask himself to do anything for this relationship, and he didn't even have the heart to make any sacrifices by himself.

He worked hard alone in silence, trying to let Lin Rong calm down slowly, or recover, and give him another chance to calm down and talk.

If successful, chase Ruan Jing back.

If it fails, Ruan Jing doesn't know what he did, so he doesn't have to be sad again.

Since Qin Xijue made this decision, he has to put away his reluctance, forcefully put on a hard and ruthless shell, and walk this arduous and long road alone.

Leaving aside the fact that Lin Rong's attitude is full of unknowns, it is unknown whether Ruan Jing will give up.

As long as one condition is not met, all his efforts will be in vain.

Ruan Jing came up with soreness: "What if I can't catch up?"

Qin Xijue answered it as a matter of course: "Keep chasing him until the end."

Ruan Jing: "What if I don't like you anymore?"

Qin Xijue obviously thought about such a result, and his eyelashes trembled: "Then wait until you meet someone you really like."

Ruan Jing wanted to cry but also wanted to laugh: "Qin Xijue, are you stupid?"

Qin Xijue looked at him sideways, and slightly bent his lips: "Fortunately, you haven't left yet."

He does gamble.

I bet that Lin Rong's eyes were watching the persistence of the two.

This is like an adventure that can only be completed by two people. Each needs to travel through mountains and rivers, and keep walking without knowing whether the other party will give up or not. Before reaching the end, they will not know whether the other party will wait there.

Fortunately, in the eyes of the elders, he is a person worthy of entrustment.

Fortunately, in Ruan Jing's heart, he is also important enough.

Only after trekking through mountains and rivers did they finally meet each other.

Ruan Jing's heart was mixed with sorrow and joy for a moment, he looked deeply at Qin Xijue for a moment, until the other party squeezed his hand comfortingly.

He clasped his ten fingers into the opponent's palm, and the palms were tightly pressed together.

The two turned their heads and looked at the lights in the operating room together silently.

After an unknown amount of time, the door of the operating room finally opened.

Ruan Jing's mind seemed to be down, and he suddenly stood up at a loss.

There was a mess in the corridor, he seemed to have lost his soul, and walked forward unconsciously with the person, his eyes fixed on the figure on the hospital bed.

All the voices in his ears disappeared, only the strength and warmth of his palms supported him all the time.

He watched a bunch of instruments being connected to his mother, the face of the person who hadn't passed the anesthesia was pale, Ruan Jing almost dug his nails into the palm of his hand.

It wasn't until Zhao Bin shook him awake that his eyes suddenly focused, and the noise around him immediately caught his ears.

Zhao Bin wiped his glasses with a smile, and squeezed his shoulder: "It's okay Ruan Jing, it's very successful, it's okay..."

Ruan Jing stood in a daze for a moment, glanced at the person on the hospital bed, and then at Qin Xijue who was looking at him, finally couldn't hold back, tears fell silently.

Only then did he realize that his strength was slowly draining, and he was pulled into a familiar embrace.

He unloaded all his strength with peace of mind, and leaned into that chest as if he had lost his support.

For the rest of the day, Ruan Jing sat on the edge of the hospital bed exhausted.

Zhao Bin and Qin Xijue sometimes came in quietly and sometimes went out, seeming to be going through formalities and shopping.

None bothered him.

He and Zhao Jie sat across from each other, staring quietly at the person on the hospital bed in a rare tacit understanding.

At night, Lin Rong still hadn't woken up. Zhao Bin told him to go back to rest and come back to replace him in the morning. Ruan Jing rubbed his uncomfortable eyes and stiff cheeks, and nodded.

The closest to the hospital is the school, so Ruan Jing simply returned to the rented room.

It was already late at night when he got home, and it wasn't until Qin Xijue wiped his face with a warm wet towel that he suddenly returned to his place of fascination.

Yes, it's all over.

His room was quiet and warm, Qin Xijue was wiping his face carefully and silently, and his eyes were full of concern staring at him.

Then, the person in front of him turned around and went to make the bed.

Ruan Jing's gaze began to follow him, and after a while, he walked over, hugged Qin Xijue's waist from behind, and pressed his face against his broad back.

Qin Xijue was taken aback for a moment, turned back, took him into his arms, and patted his head.

Ruan Jing muffled: "I'm sorry."

After a year, the dust settled, and the journey was difficult, and finally I was able to continue that period of time and pick up what I couldn't finish talking at that time.

Qin Xijue raised his face and looked at him seriously: "Xiao Jing, there is a limit to what everyone can do. Fortunately, we are all heading in the same direction. You don't have to apologize. If you don't come, I will try harder There is no way."

The other party's voice was too gentle, Ruan Jing's nose was sour, and he drooped his head: "I don't seem to have done anything..."

So busy escaping and being sad...

Qin Xijue slightly bent his lips, pinched his face: "You didn't give up, this is already very difficult."

He visited Lin Rong countless times, and he was afraid that the other party would say "don't come, Ruan Jing has already let go". Fortunately, this death sentence never came.

He has been insisting on assuming that Ruan Jing still has the possibility of being reluctant to part with him, but when he meets again, he finds that the other party has not forgotten him at all.

He also knew how hard it was for Ruan Jing this year.

Qin Xijue's Adam's apple twitched, his eyes filled with distress and apology: "I should apologize for always making you so sad."

When I was a teenager, I was full of love, and I just wanted to hold each other's hand and never let go.

In reality, there are always so many torrents that make everything impossible.The farther he went, the more he understood that Ruan Jing chose to be with him, this road was too difficult.

Fortunately, it succeeded in the end, otherwise he loves this person so much, there is no way to end it.

"no."

But Ruan Jing denied it, he raised his head, his eyes were serious and firm, "I'm happy that you love me, I'm happy that you think about me, you didn't give up, I..."

The water in those eyes was about to overflow, and the voice was also lowered due to trembling.

"...Qin Xijue, you don't know, you always make me so happy."

His emotions and feelings always follow his heart, and he always regards love as an existence of hard work, luck, and vice versa.

And Qin Xijue's determination is too firm, the idea of ​​having a future for two people is almost firmly planted in his heart, and there is no hesitation or obstacle to shake him.

Qin Xijue looked at him deeply for a moment, thousands of words were not important anymore.

The ups and downs of the road, and the expectations of the future, are not as good as the gentle moonlight in my heart and arms at this moment.

He leaned over and kissed the wet eyelashes lightly.

Then I hugged the finally lost and recovered star into my arms and rubbed it into my heart.

Ruan Jing hugged him tightly: "We have reached the finish line, haven't we?"

A hot kiss landed on his forehead.

"No, our lives have just begun."

The author has something to say:

qwq Thank you little friend for the nutrient solution. This is the first time I received a nutrient solution that was not given by me!happy~

感谢在2021-03-2711:58:57~2021-03-3011:47:06期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~

Thanks to the little angel of irrigation nutrient solution: 12310 bottles;

Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!