grandfather's daughter-in-law

Ding Jianye's funeral reminded me of a book I read in my father's study many years ago, probably called "Thus I Heard".At that time, I didn't have a deep understanding of Zen and the world of mortals. I just thought this sentence was inexplicably beautiful, so I read it casually. After reading it, I realized that this sentence full of Zen flavor was actually a story about a singing girl in the Ming Dynasty.On the banks of the Qinhuai River, there are singing and dancing every night, drunk with money, how many literati hang around tenderness, dedicate themselves to tenderness, and finally die tenderness.It's nothing more than a wealthy family, but it's just pitiful that some of them didn't even have a decent grave in the end, and only ended up with a few prostitutes.This metaphor is not very appropriate.Ding Jianye is not suave and full of poetry, and we—I, Lin Jiaxi and Yu Minxiu are not prostitutes, but the ending is somewhat similar—none of us has a legitimate woman to erect a monument for him.I have become history; Lin Jiaxi is still living in the distant and impossible future; Yu Minxiu is no longer Ding Jianguo's wife.So the corpse stayed in the hospital for two days, waiting for Ding Jianguo to come back to preside over the overall situation.

In the past few years, Ding Jianguo has come back to visit Jingnan and Jingxian from time to time, but the two children are afraid of strangers and are not close to him. Gradually, he gradually cooled down his guilt, and the number of times he came back became less and less. His time is completely forgotten.He is still wearing a suit and has a red face. He thinks his business has been booming in the past few years, and he can be regarded as a real "three middle (middle-aged, middle-class, middle-class) man".No one told him about Lin Jiaxi, he only thought that she was still a member of the troupe, and he might have heard Wang Yugui mention that she was Ding Jianye's god-sister during a chat, so he just treated her like a sister.Yu Minxiu didn't talk to him, neither encouraged nor prevented Jingnan Jingxian from talking to him, and when she had to answer, she just stated the most complete meaning in the simplest words, she treated him as she once said, happy and sad Marriage is irrelevant.

Because I couldn’t find a place to bury him, I chose cremation, but this is different from the thousands of years of traditional Chinese funerals. Wang Yugui couldn’t bear to send a white-haired person to a black-haired person, so he rented an auditorium at the funeral home to say goodbye ceremony.Ding Jianye's appearance was simply repaired, and the blood was cleaned up. It looked like he had only suffered a slight injury, but his face was lifeless and bloody.In twos and threes, distant relatives or acquaintances came to express their condolences one after another.Wang Yugui's heart was filled with sadness, and she kept crying. She just nodded and shook her head frequently amidst people's sorrowful comfort.Everyone's faces were full of sorrow for the passing of this young life, only the two children of Jingnan, Jingxian, Ding Xi and Lin Jiaxi, these children who were not familiar with the world, had a great time amidst the mourning of the crowd. Huh——I don’t usually have so many playful friends. There are mostly classmates who are familiar with each other in school. I have never seen so many people and such a big scene. Even the black gauze tied on the arm is full of novelty and joy. mysterious.As for Ding Jianye lying there, to them, he was probably just asleep.

I saw Mrs. Ma again.Dressed in a plain black coat, she walked in expressionlessly, offering her condolences.She didn't seem to have changed, she was still so beautiful, but there was no makeup on her face, no color cover, she looked much more real.She came up to us, expressed her concern, and then sat quietly to watch the ceremony.No one was with her, and she didn't seem to know anyone.People came in one after another, and even Ding Jianjun and Xu Hong also heard it. I was busy answering and thanking the gifts, and when I searched for her in the crowd again, she had left at some point.Yu Minxiu followed and disappeared.My heart flustered for no reason, and the hug in the dark night grabbed me tightly like a nightmare, but then I felt that I was really funny.All the stories, all the plots, all the dialogues, and all the feelings are all imagined by me. She never said a word of loving me, needing me or staying.This is probably love, because only love can automatically make up for all the shortcomings.Because of love, I suddenly feel sad and happy, worrying about gains and losses.But this love has now turned into regret itself.Liang Shanbo's love for Zhu Yingtai was probably just a dream.

Ding Jianye's life ended like this, and maybe it's not even a pity, because he left in such a hurry.There were so many complicated emotions in my heart that I couldn't sort out my thoughts, so I just let them wander, wander, and knead in my mind like a mess, and handed over all common things to Yu Minxiu and Ding Jianguo went to deal with it.There were not many guests, and basically no one came after a day or two.Ding Jianye's body was cremated, and his whole life passed like this, without even a handful of loess in the end.After that, Ding Jianguo negotiated several times with the father of the unruly young Cha Fulang, the perpetrator of the unfortunate accident, and reached an agreement on compensation of 100 million yuan.According to the law, Ding Xi is Ding Jianye's only heir, and I am Ding Xi's only guardian, so the money has naturally come into my hands.I held the card, which was slightly bigger than my palm, and it felt so heavy that it seemed to crush my arms.It is Ding Jianye's life, and it is the eyes of Lin Jiaxi's two children looking at me pitifully.There are too many things that the law does not recognize, but we cannot deny their real existence just because the law does not recognize them.This is not pity, nor nobleness, nor pretending to be noble, I am just atoning for my sins.So Ding Jianye's life value was divided into three points under my hands, and I only left one-third for Ding Xi.

Ding Jianguo left again.Before leaving, he chatted with Yu Minxiu for a while, probably to discuss about Wang Yugui.After this incident, she seemed older and more silent.She didn't want to say anything to me, and she didn't even want to lift her eyelids when she saw me. That night, she probably heard everything clearly.But she didn't want to leave the troupe to spend her old age with Ding Jianguoan.No matter how many unhappy things there are, she has devoted her whole life to it, and it was built by her and Ding Yongchang bit by bit. With Ding Yongchang gone, she can't just watch the troupe decline and be destroyed.But she was too old, nearly seventy years old, her temples were gray, her teeth had fallen out, and she was exhausted even from the daily food and clothing, so she could only watch helplessly.

After Ding Jianye left, the troupe's clown was vacant again.Second-tier and third-tier actors, after all, lacked a little bit of Ding Jianye's humor.Uncle Ming also retired from the troupe a long time ago.In today's world, Gezai opera is on the decline, and parents are generally no longer willing to send their children to the opera troupe. Besides, even if there are good seedlings, it still takes time to practice into a role.I don't know if it will be the year of the monkey.Yu Minxiu first thought of Lin Jiaxi, Xiaodan, a veteran opera troupe, a ready-made candidate who can get started as soon as she comes; plus a widowed mother with two children who don't know much about the world, life must always be settled. In the world, one has to support each other to go on, and she has a special status, so it seems natural for her to return to the troupe to support each other through difficulties.Yu Minxiu didn't condescendingly say to take her in, but said that the troupe needed her and hoped that they could help each other.Lin Jiaxi returned to the troupe under Yu Minxiu's persuasion.

For this reason, I put aside my idea of ​​leaving again and again.I couldn't bear her begging others to return to the troupe in a low voice, but I had to put her in a difficult situation.This folk opera troupe called Minyueshe is like a melting pot with magic power. Everyone who gets close to it and walks into it will be absorbed by it, entangled together, and refined into a ball called fate.I am like this, Yu Minxiu is like this, and so is Lin Jiaxi.Lin Jiaxi and I have no other choice, since we were 15 years old (or earlier or later), we only practice, act, and play every day, except for Gezai Opera, we know nothing.Our lives have been connected with the Gezai Opera Troupe, we share weal and woe, we live and die together.Maybe there were departures (like when I went all the way to Taipei to find Yu Minxiu, like when Yu Minxiu got married, like when Lin Jiaxi left without saying goodbye), but they all came back after all.We get together again, in this place full of weirdness, pain and closely related to love and happiness, it is probably the anchorage of life.She pulled a big box, the big boy pulled the little girl, and returned to our life again.After going round and round, in the end, there were three women with the same fate, supporting a troupe in danger, and raising five children.

Yu Minxiu prepared a family dinner for Lin Jiaxi's move in.At the dinner table, Lin Jiaxi took out a wooden carving—exactly the same as the one that the little girl held on the night of Ding Jianye's accident, but she bought it separately or it was one of them—and gave it to Ding Xi.She coaxed Ding Xi to say that Ding Jianye left because of sudden business and did not have time to give her a gift, and she was afraid that Xiao Ding Xi would be in a hurry, so she entrusted her to give it to her, hoping she would like it.Of course Ding Xi likes it, although it is bigger, better and more beautiful than what she said, even though it was not given to her by Ding Jianye himself, but one is enough to prove that she really has it, and she really did not lie.She was so happy to take the wood carving from Lin Jiaxi, she did not forget to thank her sticky (she has always been well-bred), and then looked at Ding Ziyu (the little girl) and smiled.Ding Ziyu's face was sullen, and she didn't seem very happy.Ding Zihan was the only boy among the five children, and it seemed that the delicious food on the table was more attractive to him, so he just cared about eating.The ill-fated theater troupe has since replaced the clown.