bad derailment

"Brother Lin Yao, here."

From Xiaonan's mouth shape, I judged that she was letting me pass.

After the event, the fans watched Gu Mingsheng get in the car and drive away. Before I could recover from the momentum, I received a message from her on my mobile phone.

The news told me to go around to the back of the square. The second white commercial vehicle parked on the street on the right was Gu Mingsheng's real hiding place, and he was waiting for me inside.

I had the illusion of being involved in the shooting scene, and followed Xiao Nan's instructions to find the car.She beckoned to me not far away, and she also made a clever disguise on her body, probably also afraid that this position would be discovered by careful fans.

"I thought you guys had already left," I said to her as I got closer.

Xiao Nan rubbed her head embarrassingly, "Brother Gu wanted to come to you after the end, but he was worried that those fans would follow the car, so he could only come up with a trick to make everyone think that we had left, and then quietly go out through the back door. "

She explained in a lively tone, covering up the slightly serious topic.The windows are covered with a special dark film, making it impossible to see the picture inside.My eyes stayed there for a few seconds, the car door made a crisp 'snap', and Gu Mingsheng pushed it open from inside.

Until this moment, I saw a real and complete Gu Mingsheng, different from the hypocritical projection on the stage.

After a long time, he finally appeared in front of me again.

"Xiao Yao, long time no see."

Gu Mingsheng raised his eyes to look at me, his bright smile covered the flash of tiredness in his eyes.

He was still wearing the costume he wore for the event. After leaving the spotlight, this high-profile extravagance that swayed into my eyes suddenly made me a little unsure how to approach him.

I sat in and looked out the window. Xiao Nan was standing not far away to watch the wind. The front row was empty and the driver could not be seen.It became a completely confined space, and I finally realized how deliberately the location of this conversation was chosen.

"Why did you ask Xiao Nan to call me over?" I didn't look at him, and asked knowingly.

"Xiao Yao, we have not been in touch for two weeks, sixteen days to be exact," Gu Mingsheng seemed to sigh, "I will always underestimate your cruelty."

I bit my lip complicatedly, "Is this my problem alone?"

"If I didn't let Xiao Nan do this, are you going to hide forever?"

Gu Mingsheng didn't answer my last question, but asked in this way.The back row of the car was originally spacious, but after being occupied by two adult men, the little space left made the breath tense.I have never dared to look directly at Gu Mingsheng, this extremely familiar facial features rarely made me flustered, I was afraid that I would waver, so I wrapped my whole body with coldness.

"I didn't say those words last time to push you away," Gu Mingsheng approached, his probing words mixed with slight discouragement, "I just want to spread out the problems between us and explain them clearly, and then use enough It’s time to make a decision. Xiao Yao, I know you don’t want to stay confused, and so do I.”

"is it?"

I couldn't help but want to laugh, and turned my head to meet Gu Mingsheng's complicated eyes.

"Okay, then let me tell you, I've figured it out these past few days. Being friends is the best choice for us. You follow your path as an actor, and I also want to have my own life. Don't force it, you taught me this truth."

The car fell into a long silence, swallowing the last trace of tenderness.Feeling sad for no reason, I glanced away.

"Gu Mingsheng, I still remember the last time you were in the car, you said that we would always be friends. I didn't understand the meaning of this answer at the time, but now that I think about it, you have always understood that there is no relationship more suitable for us than this .”

These words came to my mind countless times in fragments, in the middle of the night, when I thought of Gu Mingsheng.It was easier to say it than imagined, as if the dullness that had been pressing on my heart for a long time was relieved, and I could finally raise my neck and breathe new air.

For Gu Mingsheng, this obviously brought about a completely different effect.There was a flickering light in his eyes, as if mixed with sullenness, unwillingness, and loneliness that he tried his best to conceal. After speaking, he trembled slightly: "Xiao Yao, is it good for us to go back to the previous relationship? Do you remember that we were in Shaocheng at that time?" , put aside all other things and simply be together, isn’t it also very happy? Why do we have to make a clear distinction and deny these pasts?”

"Are you trying to tell me that we will always be a pair of secret lovers and bed partners? Even when we see you, we have to avoid fans and paparazzi, and make it ridiculous that we are fully armed?"

I involuntarily accentuated my tone, and each sound was accompanied by a violent heartbeat, completely pulling out the hidden facts and placing them between me and Gu Mingsheng, in front of his eyes.

What Xiao Nan said is quite right, talking face to face is definitely more effective than keeping silent.After I finished speaking, even the sound of a needle falling could be clearly heard in the car. Gu Mingsheng slowly lowered his eyes slightly, his whole body was swallowed up by the depression, and a layer of gray mist was applied to the delicate appearance, like a dazzling star Completely lost its light.

He murmured in a low voice, as if he was asking himself: "Is this... not good?"

"Where's the good?"

He couldn't answer.

I wiped my face wearily, and came up with some ridiculous thoughts.At this time last year, even though we were bored and quarreled, I was still getting along well with Chen Feng, Gu Mingsheng was still a good friend who talked about everything, and Jiang Qiushi was still a stranger who passed by.

I haven't gone on the wrong track because of a momentary heartbeat, and everything is still too late.

The more you want to gain, the more you will lose.Gu Mingsheng raised his head, unprecedented fragility and distortion poured out from his amber eyes, like broken pieces of glass, so beautiful that it is unreal under the humidity, but also so sharp that it hurts.

"Xiao Yao, there is no choice in this world to have the best of both worlds. You want stability and excitement, and no one can satisfy your two requirements at the same time."

The color of his open and closed lips was extremely light, as if he had lost all color, and every word hit my heart.

"I just want you to give me a little more time, don't choose to end so cruelly, but you never cared about my feelings from the beginning to the end, agreeing and rejecting are all in one thought, it all depends on your preferences and feelings. Anything can happen, if you make a mistake, you have to deny everything. Lin Yao, you are too greedy, I can finally understand Chen Feng's feelings now, you are not heartless, you have no heart at all."

My mind went blank, and it took me a long time to think of a rebuttal.His body couldn't stop shaking, and he couldn't say a complete sentence: "You..."

The ear-piercing ringing of the bell cut through the freezing atmosphere, piercing Gu Mingsheng's pressing questions in an instant.Regardless of his naked scrutiny, I looked at the three words "Jiang Qiushi" flashing on the screen, like a tiny electric current running through my body in an instant, setting off a stormy wave after the blank.

"I'm going out to answer a call." I buried my head and said in a low voice.

"Just pick it up here."

Gu Mingsheng decisively interrupted me, and I turned around to pull the car door as if I hadn't heard of it. After a few tries, I finally realized something, and looked at him ridiculously and angrily, "Unlock the lock, I'm going to get out of the car now .”

"I said, I'll pick it up here." He seemed to see through the uneasiness in my heart, and coldly faded away all the tenderness.

"Gu Mingsheng, let me say it again... what are you going to do?"

In this cramped environment, Gu Mingsheng easily snatched the phone from my hand.Before I could react, his face darkened for a moment, and he outlined a smile without warmth. He pressed answer the moment before I tried to get the phone back, and turned on the speakerphone.

My movements were completely frozen there.

"Lin Yao?"

Jiang Qiushi's cold voice resounded through the microphone throughout the car, with a faintly evocative tail tone and subtle inquiries.

"...I'm here, what happened?"

I took a few deep breaths, and finally forcibly ignored the existence of Gu Mingsheng, and replied in a voice as calm as possible, my heart was gradually sinking.

"Can you come over tonight?" Jiang Qiushi didn't notice the waves at this end, and his voice was slightly undulating, "I have something to tell you."

"okay, I get it."

In this almost suffocating environment, I couldn't think at all. After agreeing hastily, Gu Mingsheng, who had been silent all this time, suddenly grabbed my wrist, pressed him against him, and brought the phone to his lips. The voice replied coldly: "He won't come, we still have things to do."

The breath over there stopped abruptly.

Silence spread.

The temperature in my whole body faded in an instant, and I couldn't care about other things anymore. I struggled and tried to get rid of Gu Mingsheng's shackles and reached out to grab the phone, but he seemed to want to add another fire, and he bowed his head and kissed me in the confusion.

Perhaps it is more appropriate to call this biting, carrying all the anger of the master and plugging my lips in a venting manner, to completely blend the soul.I was pressed against the cold car window, and there was no way I could retreat to bear this rough kiss. My breath was chaotic and intertwined, and I couldn't breathe anymore. I pushed him away with all my strength, followed by a muffled sound.

The finished shape can no longer be seen from the original appearance, the hair is messy and sticks to the side of the face, and the rose brooch on the suit fell to nowhere in the struggle.Gu Mingsheng's cheeks turned red quickly, and became the only blemish on this perfect face. My palm felt numb, and finally felt an unbearable tingling pain after a while.

Not worth one ten-thousandth of the heart.

"Have you calmed down yet?"

I asked tremblingly.

Gu Mingsheng's chest kept rising and falling, and there were countless deep and dark clouds in his eyes.The fist was loosened, tightened, and repeated over and over again. The veins on the back of the hand seemed to have been stretched to the extreme, almost bursting.Did not speak.

"Give me the phone."

He didn't move, I reached for it myself, and the call above showed that it had been hung up, three seconds ago.

Jiang Qiushi heard everything.

I couldn't stop trembling, maybe it was because my expression was too ugly, but Gu Mingsheng actually showed a relieved smile, and an untimely tenderness bloomed on this slightly embarrassed face, "So this is the real reason why you rejected me."

This kind of Gu Mingsheng is terribly strange, and it seems that all the illusions have faded away, revealing a terrifying and dark inner shell.I tried my best to suppress my crumbling rationality, and squeezed out two words: "No."

But Gu Mingsheng couldn't hear him anymore, his whole body relaxed at this moment, let go of something he had been holding on to, and pulled out a distraught smile, which was a bit uglier than crying.

"Lin Yao, I'm really tired. I've been working hard and living soberly all these years, because I thought it was the best way. But now, the facts suddenly tell me that this world is not like this. It was crueler than I thought and would take away all hope from me."

Gu Mingsheng seemed to want to confide out everything that was deeply buried in his heart, and he said it to me as well as to himself.

"I am too clear about benefits and gains and losses, as well as feelings and regrets. I see everything too clearly, but I live in such pain. Xiao Yao, do you think this is God's punishment for me?"

My heart was throbbing, but I didn't know the source of this sadness. My throat seemed to be suppressed invisible, and I couldn't give any pale explanation.

"no……"

"Xiao Yao, you and Jiang Qiu will not last long, he is more complicated and dangerous than you think."

Gu Mingsheng stared at my twinkling eyes, and uttered every word from the depths of his heart.

"I will always be here waiting for you, waiting for the day you come back to me."

I almost bit my lower lip, "...why?"

"Because no one in this world understands you better than me."

He leaned down and kissed my forehead, as if he had changed back to the familiar Gu Mingsheng, and smiled with an extremely sober and affectionate smile.

"No matter what the process is, the ending will not change, Xiao Yao, I will wait for you to come back."