bad derailment

The soft big bed was attached to my back, and after a moment of coolness on the mat, the temperature from my lips immediately pulled me away.

This kiss was slow and lingering. Jiang Qiushi's arm was propped on the side of the bed, and his other hand was holding my cheek. The tip of his tongue was the most gentle aggression, gradually melting with me along the frequency of breathing.

My eyes are slightly blurred, only Jiang Qiushi's half-drowned eyes and long and dense eyelashes are left in my vision, and every tremor makes my heart tremble uncontrollably.

The heat spread from the lower abdomen to all the limbs, I slightly increased my breathing, wrapped my hands around Jiang Qiushi's waist, and pressed the thin cloth with the palms to outline the outline of his muscles, and then moved down a little bit, covering his lower body that had already felt.

As if pressing the pause button of everything, all actions stopped abruptly at this moment.When Jiang Qiushi separated from me, his eyes were once again occupied by Qingming, full of forbearance, regret, and restraint of ups and downs.

He let go of his hand against the bed, and I grabbed his cuff subconsciously, but after a pause, Jiang Qiushi still pulled away from my palm without hesitation.

He stood in front of me, his clothes were slightly disheveled, his chest heaved slightly and he pressed his hands against his lips with fists, as if he was trying to erase something, and it seemed that there was no meaning left behind.

I finally calmed down, propping the mattress behind me in silence for a while.The room was so quiet that even the sound of a needle falling could be clearly heard. After a long time, Jiang Qiushi spoke in a low voice after silence.

"It's late, you should rest."

He spoke slowly and flatly.

"Good night."

I still had his residual warmth on my lips, and after a few seconds of stagnation, I replied: "Good night."

The lights suddenly went out, as if the absurdity that filled the room was completely erased.I was lying on a strange bed, my heart was beating so violently and lost its rhythm.

Every time we met, my judgment on Jiang Qiushi was overthrown and rebuilt time after time.He obviously didn't dodge, but still chose to stop at the moment when he was about to pass.

I may know his concerns, but if so, why didn't he simply refuse at the beginning?

He clearly knew that I was not a messy person, all I wanted was his permission or rejection from beginning to end.But he avoided a straightforward response and blurred my cognition with actions. I don't know whether he did it on purpose or just couldn't help it.

I am not the only one who is obsessed with ghosts, but also him who has never been moved.Jiang Qiushi hid it so well that I had to wait for so long before I finally caught a glimpse of his restless heart.

Waking up in the morning, the whole house is full of tranquility.

The clothes changed last night were neatly stacked on the bedside table, and a note with writing on it lay quietly on top. When I got up, my mind went blank for a moment, and I reached out to take it over.

Jiang Qiushi's handwriting is elegant, and every sentence written on it is as cold and decisive as he is.I read it over and over again for a long time before I was sure that I read it correctly, and I did not mistake the meaning of each sentence above.

'Breakfast is in the microwave and you remember to eat it when you wake up.I'm sorry last night, but we don't want to see each other again anytime soon. ——Jiang'

I pinched the sticky note, scratched the thin paper with my fingernails, and it took a long time to feel the pain from my hand.

This is not what I expected to see, but strangely, I didn't have many surprises, as if this is included in the ending I expected, and it is also the most in line with what Jiang Qiu will do.

Maybe he was really obsessed with ghosts, and his mind was disturbed at a certain moment when he was with me.But this kind of throbbing is short-lived and small. Once thrown into the water filled with ice, it will be completely cooled. It cannot stand the test, nor can it support the determination to continue.

This is a correct choice. Intellectually speaking, I was even relieved by Jiang Qiushi's calmness, but people are never 100% rational animals. I threw that note into the trash can, but even so , the annoyance in my heart will not dissipate.

After washing up, I took out the white porridge that Jiang Qiushi bought from the microwave and drank it in one gulp. Chen Feng sent a message in the early morning, with only a simple 'sorry'.I paused and swiped across the screen, as I expected, Gu Mingsheng sent a belated explanation after leaving, one paragraph after another, came into view.

Gu Mingsheng: Xiaoyao, I promised to go out to dinner with Du Yuchen last time. Tonight, because he was accidentally splashed with red wine on his clothes in the restaurant, he proposed to come to my house to take a shower and spend the night. I didn't know you would come.

Gu Mingsheng: I didn't see your phone call until later, did something happen?

Gu Mingsheng: Xiao Yao, he is my boss, and it is impossible for me to treat him as an ordinary friend who can be left alone. You have to understand me.

Gu Mingsheng: You see the message and reply, I am very worried.

Gu Mingsheng: Is it about Chen Feng?

......

Gu Mingsheng: I let Du Yuchen go, Xiao Yao, where are you?

I read one by one, and the last message was sent in the early morning.I don't know if he really drove Du Yuchen away at this time, or if it was just another excuse to stabilize me.

Lies and truths, I have always listened selectively, believing that Gu Mingsheng never did it out of intention, the ridiculous thing is that I was wrong again, and it was outrageously wrong.

:never mind.

I recalled three words, and Gu Mingsheng's call soon appeared on the screen.After I picked it up, his slightly impatient voice sounded in my ears: "Xiao Yao, where are you?"

I swallowed the bland porridge in my mouth, together with the trace of astringency in my heart, I replied lightly: "Jiang Qiushi's home."

The other end was quiet, I squeezed the handle of the spoon tightly, and my breathing slowed down involuntarily.Until a long time later, he seemed to have never heard of my answer just now, and asked in a low voice: "Why didn't you reply to my message?"

"If you send it to me, I must return it?"

"Xiao Yao, I'm sorry."

Gu Mingsheng slowed down his voice and subdued me in the best way, "Nothing happened to me and Du Yuchen, so don't be angry anymore, okay?"

"I know you have nothing," I said slowly, "he's just chasing you, showing up at your house at night wearing your pajamas, you're friends anyway, I have no right to interfere in your social circle, don't worry ,I'm not angry."

These are my sincere words, and each sentence is said seriously and meticulously.It’s just that Gu Mingsheng seems to have misunderstood something again, he let out a deep breath, “Xiao Yao, there are many things I can’t help myself, I can’t control whether every step in the circle is right or wrong, I can only grasp it as much as possible. The opportunity in front of me. I don't have a choice other than that."

I understand what Gu Mingsheng is implicitly expressing. Du Yuchen is his boss, the person who holds the power over his life and death in the entertainment industry.He leaned against the big tree leaning towards him, the more ambiguous his expression, the more it represented that the road was unimpeded.

Just like he could give up his dreams for money, now he has to give up on me for his future.

But that can't be regarded as a complete abandonment. He hoped that I could understand him and continue to maintain this shady relationship by pretending that nothing happened.I betrayed Chen Feng, and he also betrayed me. This seems to be a weird relationship that can be equated.

"Gu Mingsheng, I don't mind if you are with others, or what happens is your own business, but you have to tell me and keep it from me until the last moment."

I seem to have gradually calmed down, and I still have the strength to laugh at myself, "Whether it's Du Yuchen or others, you must remember to inform me before you get together. Although I am not a good person, you shouldn't imitate me and be a bad person." Man, when the time comes, we will still be friends."

"You are fine," Gu Mingsheng was silent for a long time, "Xiao Yao, you are countless times better than you think."

I couldn't help laughing, but I didn't know what I was laughing at, "Okay, don't say such things, are you going to start work soon?"

"It's okay, there's still half an hour," he paused, as if he was a bit tentative, "Are you coming to see me this afternoon?"

"I'm not sure if there is time, if there is, I will let you know on WeChat."

"Ok, I will wait for you."

Gu Mingsheng's tone was gentle, as usual.