bad derailment

I endured the numbness of my scalp, closed the book with a 'snap' and snatched it from Lin Nuo's hand, "What kind of nonsense do you usually read?"

"Where is the mess? Isn't this a very normal novel."

"Anyway, I confiscated this book, and I will return it to you after you finish the college entrance examination."

Lin Nuo wailed: "Brother, I won't bring you like this."

I took the book and tapped her on the head lightly, "If I let mom know that you will definitely be scolded after reading these, I would be considered very kind."

She stared at me sullenly, obviously knowing that what I said was correct, so she could only reluctantly accept the result, "If I had known earlier, I would not have answered your question, and I would treat it like a donkey's liver and lungs."

The corner of my mouth twitched, "What kind of answer are you doing? Why can't I see that Chen Feng's temperament is similar to this...?"

Looking back on that description now, I feel like thunder is rolling in the sky.

"Okay, okay, I'm blind, okay?"

Lin Nuo was in a bad mood, and his tone was also bad.I reprimanded her angrily: "Speak well to me, I haven't had time to talk about you just now, Chen Feng is not much different from me, you should call him brother, don't say 'that Chen Feng', it's not polite at all."

"Brother, why are you defending him like this?" Lin Nuo murmured dissatisfiedly, tugging at the hair hanging on his chest, "And why did he come to our house for the New Year's Eve? I can't say a few words because there is suddenly one more person in the house." ?”

Lin Nuo has always said what he has to say, bluntly.But at this moment, there is still a subtle imbalance in my heart, as if my belongings are being judged by others, even if the other party is not wrong at all, there is still an impulse, wantonly moving in my chest.

"Lin Nuo, Chen Feng and I met in college."

She didn't care, "You have too many college classmates."

"I was attacked with a knife in my junior year, and he saved me."

"What hold..."

Lin Nuo's eyes widened, and he lasted for half a minute before he stammered, "He, he is the brave Chen... No, isn't he called by that name? Are you familiar? Brother, are you fooling me?"

I squeezed the palm of my hand, and my countless emotions finally turned into a complicated sigh: "It's true, he and I... met later."

To my parents, I am still a little bit hard to tell, but Lin Nuo is different, she is the best listener.I am sure she will keep it from me, as I have done for her growing up.

Back then, there were several incidents of attempted wounding with knives near Yanda University, causing panic.The suspect is a single man in his 30s with a history of mental illness for many years. His family ignored him, and because he did not cause substantial harm, he was released after being held for a few days without charge.After tea and dinner, I often heard my classmates talking about it, but I never thought that this impending disaster would befall me.

The attack came without warning, without any reason, and I was just an unlucky psychopath's chosen one.It wasn't until I was pinned to the neck by a dagger that I could barely react to all of this.Some people in the crowd were screaming, some were taking pictures, and some were calling the police. Just a few seconds of restlessness was enough to stimulate this mentally unstable man, but Chen Feng's sudden appearance changed the established happy ending drastically.

The follow-up of the incident was not ideal.The man could not be sentenced because of his mental illness history, and Chen Feng was rescued in time, all his crimes were confirmed as 'innocence', and he was sent to a mental hospital for treatment and was never heard from again.Leaving innocent victims to suffer his crimes.

The case made the news, and at the request of me and Chen Feng, the face shots were processed, and a pseudonym was used.Except for the students in the same class of Yanda University who knew a thing or two, no one knew that Chen Feng was the victim of that accident.

After the accident, the two families naturally got in touch. My mother wanted to pay all of Chen Feng's medical expenses, but Chen Feng refused.I have never dared to thank his parents face to face, out of cowardice, but also out of guilt.Fortunately, Chen Feng has been doing his best to protect me. I didn't dare to step into the hospital building for the second time and appear in front of him until I was diagnosed as non-life-threatening and transferred to the general ward.

The first words to him may be 'I'm sorry', or maybe 'Thank you', but these are not important anymore.After I had a brief and dull conversation with Chen Feng, I took a deep breath, "Chen Feng, I will definitely make it up to you. Although this incident was an accident, you did save my life. No matter what you need in the future... ...."

"I don't want money."

Lying on the hospital bed, he stared at me with a pair of black and white deep eyes, repeating the above words: "I don't want money."

I could only look at him in bewilderment, "Then...then besides money, I can give you anything within my power."

How wonderful it would be if all the accidents in the world could be settled with money.At that time, I knew that this was a fallacy, but I still couldn't help thinking in my heart.

Chen Feng turned his eyes away and looked at a pot of cactus placed by the window.The white curtain blown by the wind hangs on its small spines from time to time, bulging and drooping.This is a single ward, more expensive, and cleaner and brighter.Chen Feng wasn't short of money, but at that time, I wished he was short of money.

"Lin Yao, I want to be with you," he finally put his gaze back on me, saying every word seriously and persistently, "You always say that we are not suitable, but how do you know if we are not suitable if you don't try? You At least give me a chance, I just want this."

He's really cunning, knowing that the relationship started here just needs to press the 'try' button and I can't stop it anymore.My mind was filled with all kinds of thoughts, but it seemed to be blank, and I didn't know how long it took before I answered 'yes'.

Short, rapid, like raindrops falling and fainting on the upper layer of my heart, I can't remember anything else, except the bone-piercing cold.

......

I didn't tell Lin Nuo about my follow-up relationship with Chen Feng, but simply explained that I often went to see him after the accident, and later became friends and colleagues.After Lin Nuo listened in a daze, he could only choke out one sentence: "This is too incredible."

Yes, I also often feel that fate is too incredible.

"My parents don't know about this yet. After all, Chen Feng has changed a lot compared to before, and he used an alias when the accident happened," I told Lin Nuo, "If they haven't asked, don't take the initiative to mention it. But if they find out by themselves, it doesn't matter if you say it."

"I understand."

Lin Nuo looked like a little soldier with an important mission, and nodded solemnly, "I will definitely help you keep a secret, and... I was really rude just now. I'm sorry, brother, you should have told me earlier Brother Chen is your savior."

At the end, she smiled a few times in embarrassment, with a faint apology on her face.

I touched her head, "It's okay, just pay attention in the next two days, and I don't blame you."

If Lin Nuo's shortcoming is that she is too heartless, then her strong point is that she is extremely honest, and she will always actively admit her mistakes and correct them with practical actions.

When we got together to watch TV in the evening, Lin Nuo took the initiative to cut the fruit, each mouthful of 'Little Brother Chen', full of enthusiasm, even the closest 'Little Brother Gu' had to stand back a little.Chen Feng was a little taken aback. Gu Mingsheng's insight ability always surprised me. Without any thought, he leaned into my ear and asked, "Did you tell her everything?"

"I only told Chen Feng's identity, but didn't tell me about my relationship with him." I leaned slightly to the side, quietly avoiding the hot breath from Gu Mingsheng's lips and teeth, "Don't tell her the truth."

Gu Mingsheng's eyes flashed for a moment, as if he saw something clearly, he curled his lips, "Of course."

His smile always makes me feel like nothing good is happening.

My parents pay attention to health preservation, and they locked the door just after nine o'clock, telling us to go to bed early.Lin Nuo yawned and went back to the room to play with his mobile phone, leaving Chen Feng and Gu Mingsheng standing in the only bedroom, falling into an eerie silence.

After a whole day of excitement, I almost thought that these two people had put aside their previous differences and lived in harmony. It wasn't until this moment that they were tormented in the middle that I clearly realized that the harmony of this day was only superficial.

I pretended I didn't notice anything, pulled out a clean towel, and tried to make some mud, "Who will take a shower first? If you don't go, I'll go first."

As if realizing that he was about to be alone in the same space with Gu Mingsheng, Chen Feng immediately turned cold, and finally changed into the look I am most familiar with, "I'll go first."

There is only one bathroom in the bedroom. After Chen Feng went in, Gu Mingsheng and I were left sitting by the bed.The sound of rushing water was ringing in my ears, I was worried about how to divide the bed tonight, a heat source suddenly approached me, and I was suddenly out of my mind.

"Xiao Yao, I really thought you were out with your aunt this morning."

He tilted his head and smiled at me, but the smile did not reach the bottom of his eyes, filled with a dim light, slightly swaying.

"How is it possible? I can hide it for as long as I want." I was stunned for a while, and then pretended to be relaxed, "But you, why didn't you tell me in advance? You scared me."

"If you did, wouldn't you let me come?"

I was stuck, I didn't understand why Gu Mingsheng suddenly became so blunt, every sentence was hard to resist, and it took a long time to laugh, "How is it possible, I just worry about what Auntie Gu will do when you come here."

He had a half-smile that almost made me feel like he had seen through my excuses and got right to the heart.

"Don't worry, she met a pretty good man recently, and maybe she will find a stepdad for me soon."

"Really?"

My eyes lit up, and my joy for Gu Mingsheng was not a lie, "How is the other person? Is he reliable? Why didn't you tell me the good news earlier, I'll go see Aunt Gu after the New Year... "

"Xiao Yao."

He supported the cushion behind me with one hand, interrupted my thoughts with his actions, and his sudden approach made the surrounding air thin.I sensed something vaguely wrong, and was about to raise my head to distance myself, when a sigh sounded in my ear.

"You care more about my mother than I do."

I had no time to distinguish the hidden emotions in his words, Gu Mingsheng's amber eyes stared quietly, containing the churning dark low clouds, like ink that was too thick to melt, melted into my heart.

"Were you avoiding me on purpose?"

"I do not have."

"But you would rather meet that Teacher Jiang than take the initiative to contact me," Gu Mingsheng lowered his eyelashes, his deceptive face showed a faint disappointment with the frown between his brows, "you are still angry with me ?"

I glanced at the bathroom next to me in a panic, not knowing when the sound of water would stop, and how this conversation should end, until I realized that my voice was hoarse unconsciously, "No, don't worry too much. Thinking, Chen Feng is coming out soon, you first..."

"Why should you care about him?"

Gu Mingsheng evoked a smile, with his usual bewitching tenderness, "Since you met Jiang Qiu, haven't you already decided to give up on him?"

"No," I eagerly retorted instinctively, "Jiang Qiushi and I have nothing, don't talk nonsense."

No holding hands, no kissing, no hugging... Maybe there was a short hug, but that doesn't mean anything. The most outrageous relationship between me and Jiang Qiushi can only be called an 'ambiguous object'.

Even at this moment, I don't know whether it is "ambiguous" compared with Gu Mingsheng's actions, and Jiang Qiushi's actions.

"Not now, but there will be in the future, Xiao Yao, you should get used to this relationship in advance and understand what you want."

I understood it at first, but after Gu Mingsheng finished speaking, I fell into a strange daze, as if he was about to say something and do something that I couldn't bear and make me unbearable.Such uncertainty made my heart beat faster and my throat dried up.

There was a quiet smile in his eyes, "Or rehearse what will happen in the future in advance."

I couldn't understand what he meant, and I had a vague feeling that it wasn't difficult to guess.

Gu Mingsheng often said something that I felt was inappropriate, or made a move that was too intimate for a heterosexual, but I would eventually classify these as his 'unintentional actions'.It's not because I trust him so much, but because his words and deeds are too open, which makes my mind more and more dark and invisible.So even if he is the one pressing on me at this moment, I still seem to be bound by some kind of force, and I can't make any resistance.

The room was quiet, only the rustling of the trees in the evening wind could be heard outside the window.My mother cleans the room every half a month. Even if I only come back once a year, I can still smell the faint scent of soap on the quilt, which is especially comfortable.The sound of water in my ears stopped abruptly, and with the slight sound of Chen Feng pushing open the glass door, I stared at the perfect face so close in front of me, and the short-lived warmth pressed against my lips, maybe it was the extreme shock, but I can't afford to raise other unnecessary emotions.

"Xiao Yao, where is the hair dryer?"

Chen Feng's muffled voice came from the bathroom across the wall, I sat up as if I had just woken up from a dream, and Gu Mingsheng also let go of the hand next to me, as calm as if nothing had happened.Chen Feng repeated it again, and I answered intermittently as if I had just learned to speak: "Hair dryer? Well, that one should be placed on the third drawer, no, it seems to be on the fourth drawer... I don't quite remember." It's clear, you can find it yourself."

Chen Feng was probably very displeased with my perfunctory answer, and after a long while there was only one voice: "Got it."

In the ear, Gu Mingsheng's wet and hoarse voice was mixed with a smile, and every sound vibrated the eardrums, "Xiao Yao, do you like this kind of rehearsal?"