Meiqiang's Miserable Sand Sculpture Self-Rescue Guide

1. The troubles of keeping pets

User&*8: Pets like to bite randomly, more and more like to bite the owner, grind their teeth on the furniture every day, eat as much tableware as they buy, is there any way to stop him from biting, bite whatever you want, I can buy it, hope he don't bite me

First floor: The owner?Landlord, have you read too much secondary school literature?

Second floor: Why can pets bite tableware? ?

Third floor: Bite the master? ?hit it! !

User&*8: You can't beat him, he will hold grudges

Fifth Floor: What did you raise, why do you still hold grudges?Our dog has been cut to be honest, do you have a cat?

User&*8: almost like a cat

Seventh floor: Are you hitting too much?

User &*8: No, spank, ignore me after spanking

Ninth Floor: Our family is also spanking, and I don’t dare to spank too much. Sometimes I don’t remember long after spanking. Maybe your master is arrogant. Alas, I think the landlord can forget it. Some cats, if you bring them back, they are yours Lord, but if it really bites you hard, you still send it away, its character is too bad, it is not suitable for domestication.

User&*8: It’s not hard, he likes me so he bites me like that, but he keeps biting, I’m not made of wood, his teeth are too sharp, I can’t stand being fucked by him night after night bite

Eleventh floor:?Then you send it away?

User &*8: No, he is mine

The thirteenth floor: Yue, raising a cat can raise the oily taste of the boss, the landlord should pay less attention to the eight treasures of one litter, you can run after me.

Fourteenth Floor: Hahahaha laughed, it must like you very much, it’s clinging to you, it’s inseparable from your performance, my dog ​​also likes to bite and play with the owner, but the dog’s teeth are worn out after the puppies It's not so sharp, and it doesn't hurt to bite you lightly.

Fifteenth floor: Landlord, you don't know how to raise starlings, do you?This thing has a bad temper! !You have to grind its mouth and nails! !I remember that cats and dogs also need to cut their nails frequently, right?Starlings don't dare to get their nails done if they don't trim their nails.

Sixteenth Floor: Indeed, if cats and dogs do not trim their nails, they are prone to paronychia.

User&*8: I cut it, I didn't cut it for him one day, but you are right, I should grind his teeth

Eighteenth floor: Landlord, wait!You can't grind your cat's teeth, are you crazy? !

Nineteenth floor: If I were the host, I was bitten by a cat all night, and I couldn’t bear to express my liking to me. My girlfriend likes to bite me very much. She said that she really likes me so much, she just wants to bite a few bites, damn it , I can't stand human teeth!The landlord is too miserable, the cat's teeth are so sharp, they bite into a sieve, right?

Floor [-]: Grass, can you show affection in pet posts?Climb! !

Floor 21: Vomit!

Fu Yilan thought to himself: Hmph, this post is a fucking show of affection. I didn't expect that there are brothers and sisters in this world who have suffered the same disaster as him, but when I think of Chi Yan who stabbed him to death, no one can compare He was miserable.

It's time to grind Chi Yan's teeth, and grind them smooth. He can continue to use the needle to donate blood and make himself a Red Bull. Isn't that much better than Chi Yan biting two holes when he has something to do, and biting a body seal when he's nothing to do.

2. The cusps of the teeth have been ground flat by life

Fu Yilan didn't sleep all night, and endured Chi Yan's biting on his pectoralis major and biceps. He told him a thousand times before that it's okay, don't bite, it hurts to death, but Chi Yan's move is not wrong. Consciously, he didn't have a brain, so he bit him to express his feelings. Fu Yilan could only admit that he was wronged. Chi Yan didn't have much brains in the first place, not enough brains. This was his nemesis from heaven.

As the saying goes, behind Long Aotian there is always a wife who beats him.

Because of this, Fu Yilan did not dare to make humans with Chi Yan at all, but he could not create sports at all. Once Chi Yan was excited, it was no longer an expression of love. How wild Fu Yilan was, how wild Chi Yan was biting, and started directly Sucking blood, adding the big mouthful of dry rice exercise to the exercise of creating a human being but not being able to create it at all, Fu Yilan was numb, and Chi Yan could not force him to take an extra bite when he usually concentrates on cooking—

"No! I don't want to hurt you!"

"Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"

"If you do this, I will go on a hunger strike!"

Chi Yan, who would rather go on a hunger strike because of him, lost his sanity at this time, no matter how many CCs he sucked Brother Lan, Fu Yilan felt that if he died halfway through this job, he would be ashamed to be awarded the crown of attacking the world.

So Fu Yilan, who survived, and Fu Yilan, who was ascetic with Chi Yan, endured until six o'clock in the morning. At this time, Chi Yan began to feel confused. Fu Yilan quickly got out of bed and found his tool bag. When he opened it, there was a dazzling array of "instruments of torture". They are all from Guan Chiyan, he has prepared them from the beginning, some sedative injections, some small rose gold handcuffs—although they are those two letter supplies, but they are serious here, what kind of ropes—this is the same as The rose gold handcuffs were bought from a store, of course, they are serious items here!

Finally, there is a new member of the two-letter big family that is newly added but not used at all. He has a lot of rotten teeth in his mouth. Anyone who often deals with dentists is familiar with this thing, a high-speed turbo molar drill.

Fu Yilan's movements were very light, and he pinched Chi Yan's small and delicate chin open, tsk tsk tsk, look at his wife's red lips, those white teeth, and her tongue, how lustful and pretty she is, it's just that there are two more people who murdered him cusps.

Fu Yilan wouldn't let him shut up, and pressed his fingers in. Chi Yan had no sense of crisis at all. He was by Fu Yilan's side. When the sky fell, others cried and yelled. He slept a lot, and Fu Yilan would support him in everything. Die for love, all he.

So how could it be possible to suspect that Fu Yilan had a bad idea about his two little fangs.

Chi Yan pretended that Fu Yilan was having fun with him, and coquettishly mumbled with his fingers in his mouth: "Oh, I'm going to sleep, so don't mess with me."

Zizizi———— buzzing———

Chi Yan opened his eyes suddenly, the goddamn Fu Yilan took a dentist's electric molar stick, no matter how hard he struggled, it would be useless.

Kicking, banging, chattering, teeth splashing, screaming, and vague cursing, all the noise came from Chi Yan's teeth and mouth.

afterwards

Chi Yan stood in front of the half-length mirror and cried loudly, scolding, "My brave and unrestrained tiger teeth are pointless!!" "If I meet other vampires, I'll be a fucking handicap!!" "You made me a vampire!" shame!!"

The culprit, Fu Yilan, leaned to the side, folded her arms, folded her long legs, and said without shame, "Aren't you arrogant to me with your teeth every day? Do you dare to threaten me by biting me? Want to see other vampires? Don't even think about it." , you’re the only one here, I should have thought of it earlier, you said it’s useless to deal with vampires, it’s over if you pull out your teeth.”

As he said that, he joked about himself, and pulling out the vampire's teeth is really hurtful.

Now, Chi Yan was no longer dangerous, and Fu Yilan had to admit that it wasn't for the inspiration of the netizens, how could he come up with such a brilliant move.

Now, we can make up for those who made less mistakes.

Chi Yan was picked up and couldn't help saying that he was kidnapped into the bedroom. Chi Yan was not happy, not happy. Fu Yilan violated his canine teeth on his own without discussing with him. This kind of machismo Long Aotian's style.

Chi Yan resisted violently, punched and kicked, and it was impossible for Fu Yilan to use force on him, accusing him: "Chi Yan, you won't let me touch it? You really won't let me touch it? Do you want to be a widow? Are you not greedy?" Me?"

After several repeated questions, Chi Yan's arrogance was completely killed. In fact, he and Fu Yilan had a half-truth and half-fake temper. There was no step down for a while, so he had to pretend.

Chi Yan turned away his face and spread his limbs. The resistance was no resistance, but his mouth was still unwilling to show weakness, but his tone was suspiciously weak: "Hmph, in broad daylight, do you want to pile on my ashes?"

Fu Yilan sneered and said to him, "Come on."

The reason why Fu Yilan laughed at Chi Yan was because the basement he took Chi Yan to was beautifully decorated. A small bedroom had to be lit during the day and night. The sun can't get in at all, and there is no condition to turn Chi Yan into ashes.

So I had to use other places to drive piles, unfortunately.

3. How do vampires make friends

Now Chi Yan not only has his nails cut clean by Fu Yilan every day, but also regularly grinds his teeth with a drill. On the surface, Chi Yan is no different from a normal person. He doesn't worry about hurting others when he loses his teeth. When it was not too late, he ran out to play.

The only bad thing is that if Fu Yilan doesn't have time to accompany him, he will run to play with his friends alone, and if there are some wounds on his friends, he will smell them, and if he doesn't pay attention, he will sniff them close to them, and even sniff them. If you have bitten your teeth, the teeth will be ground flat, and the damage will not be great, but the person will appear mentally handicapped.

Although mentally retarded, Chi Yan is really good-looking and has a cute personality, so everyone didn't care about it, but thought it was a little weird.

Later, Chi Yan's friends contacted Chi Yan who only appeared at night, kept silent about his job, and only politely said that he was an unemployed vagrant, clingy from time to time, and exquisite in appearance, couldn't he be... a young man who lost his way? ?

It turned out that some people really expressed interest in Chi Yan, which was beyond the meaning of friends.

Who made Chi Yan look good and have a cute personality!

It's worth it!

Fu Yilan came here, and as soon as he appeared, everyone was shocked. Damn it, Chi Yan was not a single young man who lost his way. He had always had a boyfriend, and the boyfriend was a self-made boss in the city.

Chi Yan said embarrassedly: "Hey, I'm really a vagrant, I didn't lie to you, it's just... the kind of waste who eats boyfriends, lives with boyfriends, and doesn't do anything every day. "

These words sound very humble and self-aware at first glance, but the more you listen to them, the more bitter they become.

Why didn't this good thing happen to me?

4. You still have to support your family

Fu Yilan managed to assume the identity of a prodigal son, but in the end he eloped with Chi Yan. He was poor and white, and he still had to clean up and earn money to support his wife.

Then get rich.

Chi Yan: It's not that I want salted fish, it's that Brother Lan is too strong!I can only cook salted fish next to Brother Lan!

Fu Yilan opened Chi Yan's space, and posted more than 100 sentences in it [It's cool to be a salted fish] [I just want to be a salted fish] [Brother Lan works very hard, but I just want to be a salted fish] and so on.

Fu Yilan: Hehe.

5. Those who want to play with oil

Chi Yan: "Today, you can either call me a girl or a goblin, otherwise, don't touch me."

Fu Yilan: "..."

Chi Yan: "Brother Lan, hurry up, I didn't show you a lot of cases, you just follow along, I will be very excited, don't you want me to be excited about you?"

Fu Yilan: "...Forget it, go to bed, goodbye." She fell into a deep sleep with her head covered.

6. Forever

In this world, he and Fu Yilan did not follow the protagonist route and become the first bird, but "returned to the garden" and ran directly.

Unable to proceed with the main storyline, unable to correct the ending, they simply ran away together, being a passer-by for the rest of their lives, plain and ordinary, making people at the end of the bed after arguing at the head of the bed.

But this "plain and plain" has made a fortune, ordinary people can't learn it!