early morning twilight

The mobile phone is full of express delivery codes, and the earliest one has reached the time limit for being returned.

The owner of Cainiao Station called and asked if he needed door-to-door service.

More than 20, originally one yuan each, pulled up together, [-]% off and a zero, only ten yuan.

Si Ye was lying on the bed, the rare sunshine in winter shone on his face.

"Hello? Do you want to give me a voice?"

Si Ye sat up, his voice hoarse from the hangover, "No, I'll pick it up later."

The boss is a little irritable: "Hurry up if you want to get it! I don't even look at how many days it has been piled up, and I will not charge you for overtime!"

"Okay, here we come."

"Tsk, I can't bear ten dollars..."

The boss cursed and hung up the phone.

Si Ye sat for a while, thinking nothing of it.

He has often been in this state these days, not thinking about anything, avoiding recalling the details of being with Jin Chongshan.

As if that would save me from being sad.

He seems to be doing quite well.

During the New Year's Day holiday, he locked himself at home without seeing anyone.

Just confessed to Si Yu, Si Yu understood that he and Jin Chongshan thought about the world of two people, and did not disturb him.

Although he called once, he lazily said that he was sleeping.

Si Yu choked, obviously thinking wrongly, and told him irritably not to overindulge in sex, and didn't call again after that.

After New Year's Day, "The Wilderness" began to be busy with new year's projects.

He groomed himself perfectly, and every strand of hair was blown into the way he wanted.

Get busy, no one notices that he is any different from before.

Sister Xing asked Brother Jin why he hadn't come for several days.

His hand holding the pen paused slightly.

He calmly said: "There are many things on the plateau in winter that need him to deal with, and he will go back temporarily after New Year's Day."

Sister Xing nodded, "Then let's catch up with work and try to finish all the pressing work before the Spring Festival. We will have a holiday in advance, so you can go to Brother Jin early."

He smiled, "OK."

Jin Chongshan's indifference really infected him.

He concealed the breakup from everyone, even himself, occasionally felt that they hadn't broken up, and that Jin Chongshan was just going back to Kashgar to deal with what had to be done.

It's just that some details are still stubbornly reminding him——

Your indifference is fake, you are not as calm as you show.

He often forgets to eat.

I work overtime in the studio until very late every day, and when I get home, my mind is blank, and I need alcohol to fall asleep.

Sometimes he woke up to feel the wetness of the pillow.

But he couldn't remember that he had cried, and he couldn't remember anything that made him sad in the dream.

The courier also forgot to pick it up.

It's not forgotten, the pickup code will be sent every day.

But he was not in the mood to get it.

It could also be, fear of getting something.

Before leaving Kashgar, he thought he would go back with Jin Chongshan.

He never thought that Jin Zhongshan would keep him.

He lived in Kashgar for half a year.

The bedroom above the grocery store, the clothing store, and the yard are full of traces of him.

He also likes to spend money, useful things are useless, as long as he likes them, he will buy them back.

Jin Chongshan is easy going, and doesn't have much luggage anywhere.

Jin Chongshan's personal space has long been filled with his belongings.

These things will definitely be sent back by Jin Zhongshan, right?

They will be crowded in the station like a pile of unwanted garbage.

All other packages were needed and picked up by buyers with great anticipation.

Only they are discarded.

Even he, the recipient, was unwilling to bring them back.

Si Ye stared at the sun for a while, his eyes hurt from being stabbed.

But the rubbish is piled up in the station, which is also causing trouble for others.

Si Ye thought, the weather is fine today, let's go clean up all the garbage.

When he got out of bed, he was in a daze and fell down.

His bare knees hit the floor hard, ripped.

But the pain didn't seem obvious, he didn't even bother to apply the medicine, and went to the bathroom to wash up.

Previously, the bedroom floor was carpeted.

He and Jin Zhongshan did it on the carpet.

A few days ago, he spilled wine on the carpet, and it was difficult to clean it up, so he threw it away.

Once, when he got out of bed, his waist and legs were weak, and he also fell down.

The knee hit the soft carpet without pain.

Jin Chongshan hugged him horizontally and rubbed his knees very gently while helping him take a bath.When she put him back on the bed, she even kissed the red spot.

For a while, he suspected that his knees were not flushed, but were rubbed red by Jin Zhongshan.

The electric toothbrush had stopped vibrating, but Si Ye was still holding it unconsciously.

It wasn't until toothpaste and saliva dripped all over his chin that he sighed and washed it off quickly.

When picking up the courier, Si Ye borrowed a scooter from the boss.

All the twenty or so parcels were loaded onto the trolley, without a single glance they were large luggage.

Si Ye asked, "Is that all there is?"

The boss threw the machine to him impatiently, "You are right!"

Si Ye read all the couriers corresponding to his mobile phone number, and none of them came from Xinjiang.

After returning the machine to the boss, Si Ye was inexplicably relieved.

After pulling all the packages home, Si Ye sat at the door and unwrapped them.

He had to think about several packages before he knew what it was.

When No. 20 was disassembled, Siye suddenly stopped moving.

Gradually straining his hands, the finger bones turned white.

It was a box of snail noodles.

After eating toilet skewers with Jin Chongshan, he urged Jin Chongshan to quickly buy a box of snail powder and send it to Kashgar.

Express delivery to Xinjiang is relatively slow, especially in winter.

If you don't send it early, they may not be able to eat it when they go back.

Jin Chongshan agreed, but he didn't know if he would buy it or not, and he didn't urge him.

This box of snail noodles was actually sent to Chengdu.

Si Ye's fingertips trembled a little, he found out the manifest and unfolded it.

Order date is December 28th.

He had already arrived at the station on the 31st, but he didn't pick it up.

He said that he wanted to spend New Year's Day in Chengdu.

So the snail powder was sent to Chengdu on the eve of New Year's Day.

But they didn't have time to eat.

Si Ye held a package tightly, almost breaking the package.

What was Jin Chongshan thinking when he placed the order?

Are you going to eat with him?

He didn't know when Jin Zhongshan started thinking about breaking up, did he start when he first came to Chengdu?Still in the middle of the show?

He remembered Jin Zhongshan's silence every time he mentioned going back to Kashgar.

Around that time, Jin Chongshan was also suffering from repeated hesitation.

Si Ye stood up unsteadily, took the bag of crushed snail noodles to the kitchen, turned on the fire, and boiled water.

At least Jin Chongshan once wanted to spend this new year's day with him.

It was only on the 31st that I suddenly made up my mind to leave.

How about a few days earlier and a few days later?

Jin Chongshan will still break up with him.

When the water boiled, Si Ye poured the powder and ingredients into it.

The smell of sour bamboo shoots filled the kitchen, and in the end the pot was overcooked, and Si Ye didn't pick them up.

The powder was thrown away together with the pot.

The Spring Festival this year came earlier, at the end of January.

During the meeting yesterday, Si Ye suddenly announced that he had accepted a cooperation with a Japanese studio and would bring a group there after the Spring Festival.

Everyone was surprised.

Didn't you say last time you're going to Kashgar after the new year?

Si Ye didn't explain, and took the work back to the loft, stayed up all night to communicate with the other party, and came up with a schedule that both parties were satisfied with.

It's almost dawn, and "Wilderness" has an annual meeting in the afternoon, and then it's a holiday.

Si Ye was tired, but not sleepy. He wanted to drink a cup of coffee, but there was no takeaway at this time.

There is a coffee machine at home, but it has not been used for a long time.

He rummaged through boxes and cabinets to find the coffee machine, but when looking for beans, he took out a bag of tea.

Not the tea bag he used to soak the water, but the tea he used to brew.

There is also a bag of milk powder on the side, extra-rich goat milk powder from Xinjiang.

There is also a bottle of salt, which is different from the one used for cooking.

He complained that the salty milk tea made from tea bags didn't taste like Kashgar. Later, Jin Zhongshan asked someone to send tea and milk powder over.

But time was tight, so I only cooked it once.

On the day Jin Chongshan left, he almost wiped out all traces of existence.

The ingredients for making salty milk tea remained.

Is it because he likes salty milk tea, so leave it to him?

However, he likes salty milk tea not because it is so delicious that it is addictive.

Just because the salty milk tea is the salty milk tea on the Pamirs, it is the salty milk tea cooked by Jin Zhongshan himself.

Jin Chongshan was the only one who made him addicted.

Si Ye closed his eyes, squatted for a while, and closed the cabinet door.

He didn't make salty milk tea, and suddenly found it troublesome to grind coffee beans, so he mixed a cup of instant coffee and made a fuss.

The Pamirs have the coldest wind of the year.

The earth is a vast expanse of white, except for sporadic black, no other colors can be seen.

Hotels and B&Bs in Taxian County are closed, and only one youth hostel is still open.

Every year at this time, a very small number of outdoor warriors come to Ta County, wanting to witness the Karakoram in the snow.

A few days ago, two people were in danger on a mountain with an altitude of more than 4000 meters. The owner of the Youth Hostel and Jin Zhongshan personally brought them back.

The boss wanted to ask Jin Zhongshan to take them to the village below.He was relieved that Jin Chongshan was here.

But Jin Chongshan shook his head and said that he would not bring any guests.

The boss thought about it and understood.

At this time in previous years, Jin Chongshan was busy delivering supplies to the border guards, and he really didn't take many guests.

When he arrived at the station of the border guards, Jin Zhongshan did not return immediately.

Patrol with them and trade carts for horses.

The old border guard was full of surprise, saying that the site was fully staffed.

He said in a low voice, when he came, he would do his part and change a few border guards to rest.

After staying on the mountain for three days, Jin Chongshan came back, and Gulibayi was so distressed that he hurriedly pulled him to the stove to see if he was injured and frozen.

Jin Chongshan chuckled and said he was fine.

Kurban made a table of yak hot pot.

This is what I eat at home, not as particular as in the store.

Gu Libai asked Siye why he didn't come back, and the little girl in the hotel next door was looking forward to wearing the new clothes from Siye's store.

Jin Zhongshan said that Siye is very busy in Chengdu.

Gulibayi and Kurban didn't think too much, and after chatting for a few words, they urged Jin Chongshan to eat more.

The next day, Jin Chongshan went up the mountain again.

The wind and snow from Karakoram blew across my face, making it extremely cold.

He rode a horse and ran across the vast snow field, and the howling wind and snow looked like a silent film in his eyes.

Silent, but even more fierce.

There are no mountains ahead, and the end of the snow field is a gray sky.

Suddenly, an unresolved depression rose in his chest, and he galloped towards the place where the sky meets the snowy field.

But no matter how you run, you can't run to the end.

The sky and the snow field will not really meet.

But the mountains will.

The continuous snow-capped mountains finally appeared in the field of vision.

They took over Yukino from the skyline and stood there forever, which is the true destination of Yukino.

At the coldest moment in winter, Jin Zhongshan suddenly remembered a conversation between Si Ye and him in summer——

"The sky can be home to the wilderness too. You see."

"But the sky doesn't really wait for the wilderness. It just gives the illusion that the wilderness waits."

Jin Chongshan reined in the reins, and the horse stopped.

What the sky gives to the wilderness is an illusion.

What time gave him was also an illusion.

The author says:

That conversation is in chapter 19