Specific gravity

"Zhaozhao, this is our first New Year."

"This is our second year, Bo Yan, happy new year."

That night, Cen Baiyan had an extremely chaotic dream. He returned to the dilapidated hut in the University City, he hugged Xuanzhao and asked, "Have I lived in the house in your heart?" Then the scene changed, and Chinatown The lights were decorated and the fireworks lit up the whole sky. The children riding on their father's neck clapped their hands and cheered. Xuan Zhao said, "I learned a new dish, do you want to try it?"

The two New Year's scenes flashed back alternately in this dream. One second, Xuan Zhao was smiling with his eyes bent, and the next second, Xuan Zhao's eyelashes were wet. The faces of the two Xuan Zhao gradually overlapped, and the warm voice called him "Baiyan".

Baiyan, Baiyan, Baiyan.

Cen Baiyan woke up suddenly and found himself covered in cold sweat and dizzy.

He got up and took a cup of cold medicine. The room was so quiet that only the sound of his own breathing could be heard. Cen Baiyan slowly blinked his heavy eyelids, and when he turned his head to see the light of the sky outside the window, he suddenly had a sense of unreality.

In the dull pain in his forehead that gradually intensified, Cen Baiyan even began to wonder whether this person Xuan Zhao really existed, or whether it was just his own fantasy from the beginning to the end.Otherwise, how could he be so worthless that he tossed and turned in pain because of one person, and every day when he opened his eyes, he felt empty in his chest, as if no matter how many people he met and how many things he experienced, he couldn’t fill that hole .

Cen Baiyan put his hand on his forehead, stared blankly at the ceiling, and a question came to his mind: "What is the missing piece in my body?"

——It must be because I'm not busy enough, I'm full enough to have the time to be fucking hypocritical here.

Cen Baiyan was unwilling and did not dare to think about this question, he gave himself a sloppy answer arbitrarily,

After taking the cold medicine, he was a little sleepy, but it was already dawn, and Cen Baiyan was afraid that he would fall asleep for a while and wouldn't be able to wake up, so he simply got up, drank a cup of coffee after washing, packed up and went out to school.

In the next few days, all the media who were squatting at the school gate like flies disappeared. Cen Baiyan knew in his heart that this must be Xuan Zhao's handwriting.

Xuan Zhao came here this time probably to help him solve these troubles.

Cen Boyan couldn't accept what Xuanzhao did for him calmly, but he couldn't find a good way to refuse.

No matter whether he accepts or rejects, he will inevitably have an intersection with Xuan Zhao. This is not a problem at all. It is normal for lovers to separate and reunite.

However, the beginning of his relationship with Xuanzhao stemmed from hatred and deceit. He couldn't calmly be ordinary friends with Xuanzhao, because every time they met and every word they said, they were hurting others and themselves.

Why bother?

"Why bother?" Uncle Gong also asked Xuan Zhao.

He came to the United States alone, and Uncle Gong was 1 worried.During the absence of others, the hospital delivered the latest inspection report directly to Uncle Gong. Only then did Uncle Gong know that Xuan Zhao's health was getting worse. There was a situation where she was unconscious for nearly an hour. The doctor suggested that there might be a nervous system dysfunction, and Xuanzhao needed to do further brain examination.

Brain exam? !

Uncle Gong was heartbroken and angry at the same time. In his opinion, all diseases involving the "brain" are serious diseases.He took care of Xuanzhao for nearly 20 years, and watched Xuanzhao grow from a chair-high doll to the head of the Xuan family today, which revived the Xuan family.Uncle Gong was reused by Xuan Boyuan when he was young, and he worked for the Xuan family all his life. He thought he could rest in peace, but he finally lived up to Xuan Boyuan's entrustment to bring up Xuan Zhao, and he can go underground to see the master with peace of mind, but Xuan Zhao is like this Rushing his own body, what face does he have to go to see the master!

It was the first time that Uncle Gong got angry with Xuan Zhao when he was so old, and asked him to come back immediately for a comprehensive physical examination. If he stayed in the United States any longer, he would personally catch Xuan Zhao and come back!

Xuanzhao couldn't laugh or cry, and patiently explained that "nervous system dysfunction" is not a disease at all, and doctors like to exaggerate.But how could Uncle Gong listen to it, and brought out his trump card and said: "If you don't come back again, I will tell Miss about it!"

Just like he always called Xuanzhao "Young Master", no matter how many years have passed, no matter how old Xuanyu is, Uncle Gong always calls Xuanyu "Miss", it seems that in the eyes of Uncle Gong, Xuanyu will always be the seventeen An eight-year-old girl in a dress watering the garden.

Xuan Zhao felt warm because of this title, and said with a smile, "Uncle, my mother knows everything."

Uncle Gong was shocked: "Impossible!"

"She taught me to be brave," Xuan Zhao said while standing by the French window, turning on the speakerphone, "She knows all about it."

"Then...then you can't either." Uncle Gong sighed heavily, "I have to love my body!"

"I cherish it." Xuan Zhao said.

He cherishes himself, he takes medicine on time and has regular check-ups, but the deterioration of some injuries is inevitable and irreversible.

Uncle Gong was speechless for a while, and after a while, he said worriedly: "Master, come back quickly, you want to compensate him, can't you use other methods? Why do you do this for him?"

"I didn't want to compensate him, nor did I do this for him," Xuan Zhao raised his eyes to look at the clear sky, and said softly, "I did it for myself."

He wanted to get Cen Baiyan back, he wanted to be with Cen Baiyan again, not for anyone else, but for himself.

For himself who was deeply loved by Cen Baiyan, for himself who realized that he also deeply loves Cen Baiyan after hurting Cen Baiyan.

Gong Qiao didn't know how she knew Xuan Zhao's physical condition, so she didn't speak after making the video call, sobbing silently over there.

Xuanzhao was almost the same size as the head of two, and he was the worst at comforting people, especially the little girl, so he quietly waited for Gong Qiao to cry enough, and then asked amusedly, "Is the flood out?"

"Well," Gong Qiao has always been introverted, and she couldn't even speak for a moment when she was teased by Xuan Zhaoyi. After a while, she asked cautiously, "Brother, does Brother Baiyan accept you?"

"Not yet," Xuan Zhao shook his head, "Don't worry so much, just go to school."

"I know," Gong Qiao said solemnly, "I guess Brother Bai Yan is very difficult to chase, you have to work hard."

"Little girl," Xuan Zhao raised his eyebrows, "You speak as if you are very experienced."

Gong Qiao's ears became completely red in an instant. She really didn't have much experience. She and Zhuo Feifei were childhood sweethearts, and it happened naturally. good.

Xuan Zhao always felt that Qiaoqiao was too honest and docile, since he was a child, he was worried about her disadvantage. He was really not very competent as an older brother, and he rarely took the initiative to care about Gong Qiao's current situation. Fortunately, Qiaoqiao had Zhuo Feifan to accompany him.

Gong Qiao and Xuan Zhao chatted about recent events, saying that she and Zhuo Feifan went to see a stage play together last week. Gong Qiao casually praised the gorgeous and elegant skirt of the heroine. Shopping, ordered that princess dress.

"My birthday will be in half a month. I guess Brother Feifei wants to give me a surprise." Gong Qiao blushed, "Brother, you have to pretend you don't know."

"Okay, I didn't hear anything." Xuan Zhao replied with a smile, leaning back in his chair.

"Brother Fei Fei does this, I am very happy, this should be the pursuit," Gong Qiao said with a carving knife in his hand, tilting his head, "If you pursue Brother Bai Yan, you must also make him happy and surprise him .”

Xuan Zhao's eyelashes trembled, making Cen Baiyan happy, surprising Cen Baiyan?

Immediately he lowered his head and smiled wryly, thinking to himself, I am afraid that no matter what he does, Cen Baiyan will not feel happy.

Xuanzhao seemed to be caught in a strange circle, he didn't know how to get closer to Cen Baiyan, so he could only approach Cen Baiyan by instinct, but pushed Cen Baiyan further and further away again and again.

After hanging up the video, Xuan Zhao leaned back in his chair and took a deep breath.

stage show?

With a thought in mind, Xuan Zhao pursed his lips nervously, and then searched for any recent performances at the City Theater.

"Great performance, the heroine's dress is so beautiful, you can become a princess when you put it on! I hope I can have one too. My prince, please come to me with the princess dress!"

Cen Baiyan swiped his phone for a while during class, and saw that Cen Qing had posted such a circle of friends three days ago, with a picture of two tickets.

He zoomed in on the picture, and it turned out to be a ticket to a stage play performed in English. It told the story of the heroine growing from an unknown to a master of sculpture. Due to the niche subject matter, it was not very popular on the Internet.The reason why Cen Baiyan knew it was purely because he had heard Xuan Zhao before. On Gong Qiao's birthday last year, the birthday gift Xuan Zhao chose for her was the performance recording compilation of this troupe.

This kind of artistic performance has never had anything to do with Cen Qing, why would Cen Qing go to this performance?

He didn't care, anyway, Cen Qing was passionate about everything for 3 minutes, he just thought that Cen Qing had found some new interest.

Cen Baiyan packed a few books and went to the library. The school library is also the district library, which is open to non-campus citizens, and they can apply for a library card after paying a certain deposit.

There are always many people on the first and second floors of the museum. In contrast, the dictionary library on the basement floor is much deserted. Cen Baiyan usually goes there to find a place for self-study.After going down the stairs, he went straight to the table where he often sat by the window, put down his books and went to the tea room as usual.

After receiving a cup of coffee, Cen Baiyan paused——

There was a person sitting across from the place where he originally placed the book. The person was thin and thin, with a dark gray coat draped over the back of the chair, the cuffs of an off-white sweater rolled up to the forearm, revealing well-shaped wrist bones, and a black walking stick leaning against the window , the slender shadows were drawn by the sunlight outside the window.

Hearing the voice, Xuan Zhao turned his head and greeted with a smile: "Bai Yan."

That trance feeling came again.

A long time ago, at the cafe at Harbor University, Xuan Zhao taught Chen Wei English, and Cen Baiyan always found various excuses for himself to go with him.Xuan Zhao likes the position by the floor-to-ceiling windows, as long as he needs a glass of boiled water, he will bend his eyes when he sees him, and when he smiles, the scar on his lips is like a shallow dimple, and say to him, "Hi, kid."

At that time, Cen Baiyan's heartbeat would always involuntarily speed up, but at this moment, Cen Baiyan felt a sharp pain in his heart, and he frowned: "Why are you here?"

Xuan Zhao picked up the admission card in hand, and said to Cen Baiyan: "Okay—"

"Don't tell me it's a coincidence," Cen Baiyan interrupted him, "I don't believe it."

"What a coincidence," Xuan Zhao wrinkled the tip of his nose, and changed the topic, "I came here specially to wait for you."

He got his card and sat near the entrance of the museum. He saw Cen Baiyan as soon as he appeared.

Of course he knew every big and small habit of Cen Baiyan. He knew that Cen Baiyan would make a cup of coffee before he started to study, so he saw the gap, seized the small gap, and sat opposite Cen Baiyan.

"I'm pursuing you, so I want to create an opportunity to get along with you," Xuan Zhao's usual pale cheeks were a little red from the sun, he pursed his lips, looking a little embarrassed, but his eyes were always firmly fixed on Cen Baiyan, ".It may be a little annoying, please forgive me."

"Haven't you always been a smart person?" Cen Baiyan sneered softly, "Why are you doing stupid|forceful things now?"

Xuan Zhao neither refuted nor explained, and raised his hand to touch the bridge of his nose.

The light in Cen Baiyan's eyes moved slightly, he didn't want to give himself any chance to sway or be moved, so he thought about simply changing his position.

Xuan Zhao stood up one step ahead of him: "Sit here, here, actually, my seat is over there."

He stretched out his hand and pointed to the rear left. Xuanzhao's laptop was placed on a table diagonally opposite Cen Baiyan.

"You study hard, I won't disturb you." Xuan Zhao said.

Cen Baiyan turned a deaf ear, sat down, followed the bookmarks and opened the thick "Profile Manual".

Harsh words seemed to have no effect on Xuanzhao, Cen Baiyan simply chose to ignore them completely.

Xuan Zhao stood in a daze for a few seconds, then lightly clenched his fists, as if he could give himself courage in this way.

After a while, he bent down slightly, and the sunlight cast a light shadow on his figure on the table, completely covering Cen Baiyan.

Xuan Zhao asked in a low voice: "Can I invite you to have dinner together? I found a very good Chinese restaurant not far from here."

"No need," Cen Baiyan didn't raise his eyes, "I'm going to read a book."

Immediately afterwards, the light shadow covering Cen Baiyan froze, and Cen Baiyan moved his eyes away, pretending that he didn't notice it.

"Okay, then I'll ask you later."

Xuan Zhao straightened up slowly, picked up the walking stick by the window, walked to the table on the left front and sat down.

Behind him, the tip of Cen Baiyan's pen paused on the page, and when he came back to his senses, there was a piece of dark blue ink the size of a fingernail on the white paper.

Although Xuan Zhao went to another desk, he didn't take away the windbreaker that he had draped over the back of the chair. He deluded himself into thinking that leaving a piece of clothing was equivalent to him sitting opposite Cen Baiyan.

After Xuanzhao sat down, he waited anxiously for a few minutes, but Cen Baiyan didn't throw his clothes over, so he was a little bit pleased.

He chose this position very delicately, neither so close that Cen Baiyan can see him directly when he looks up, nor so far that he is out of Cen Baiyan's field of vision; more importantly, he used to be in the lakeside cafe of Harbor University, He and Cen Baiyan also often sit like this.

Cen Boyan lowered his head and focused on his professional book; Xuan Zhao also put on his glasses, took out a stack of documents from his backpack, and began to read them, writing some comments on them from time to time.

The entire basement floor was very quiet. Occasionally, students who borrowed dictionaries came down from the upstairs, and as soon as the footsteps sounded, Xuan Zhao looked up at Cen Baiyan as if he had found some kind of bunker for cover.

How long had it been since he and Cen Baiyan breathed quietly in the same space like this? It was so long that Xuan Zhao couldn't remember.

After reading a stack of documents, Xuan Zhao sent an e-mail, then took out a slightly tattered hard-shell notebook from his bag, turned to the latest page, and wrote the first line on it with a pen.

Cen Baiyan's cold has not recovered. After coughing a few times, he raised his hand and pinched the center of his eyebrows. He picked up the empty cup and went to the tea room again.

When he returned to his seat, there was a board of pills and a small delicate medicine bag on the table.

He subconsciously raised his eyes to look at Xuan Zhao, who just happened to be looking at him with a smile: "Chinese patent medicine, the effect is very good."

Cen Baiyan glanced at the things on the table, and swept them aside with his forearm.

The corners of Xuan Zhao's raised lips were slightly stiff, and his left hand rubbed his painful knee under the table.

Cen Baiyan opened the book, and there was a drama ticket in the book. There was a small piece of paper attached to the ticket for tonight's performance at the City Grand Theater. The handwriting was beautiful, and a puppy with drooping ears was drawn on the upper left corner. .

——May I invite Mr. Cen Baiyan to watch a drama together after dinner?

The inscription is "Xuan Zhao".

Cen Baiyan just glanced at him lightly, without any emotion in his eyes, and he didn't respond to Xuan Zhao.

Xuan Zhao has been observing Cen Baiyan's reaction from the corner of his eye. Cen Baiyan's indifference and ignorance are like an invisible big hand, tightly grasping Xuan Zhao's throat.

It's okay, it's okay.

Xuan Zhao's ten fingers tightened slightly, telling himself again that it's okay, at least he didn't directly refuse, right?

The sunlight outside the floor-to-ceiling windows gradually turned golden yellow, Cen Baiyan took a deep breath, closed the book, and stood up.

"Bai Yan."

Xuan Zhao immediately yelled, he tried to stand up with his hands on the table, but fell back to his seat because of the sudden loss of strength in his left leg.

Cen Baiyan crumpled up the draft paper and threw it into the trash can, while Xuan Zhao tried his best to support his body with a walking stick.

"It's getting dark," he asked Cen Baiyan with a smile, "Can we have dinner together?"

Cen Baiyan picked up the book on the table one by one: "I'm not hungry."

".I'm not too hungry." Xuan Zhao saw that Cen Baiyan was about to leave, so he propped up his crutch with his left hand, and hurriedly closed the computer and packed up the files with his right hand, "How about going to a play? The show has a good reputation. "

"Not interested in."

Cen Baiyan didn't seem to notice Xuan Zhao's trembling left leg and flustered movements. After rejecting Xuan Zhao without any delay, he picked up his book and turned around to leave. His pace was even faster than usual, as if he was afraid that if he slowed down, he would be caught. shake.

Xuanzhao once again watched Cen Baiyan's back fading away from his sight. On Cen Baiyan's desktop, cold medicine, herbal medicine packs, drama tickets and small pieces of paper were all left behind, all of which Cen Baiyan didn't want.

——Just like me, Cen Baiyan didn't want it.

Xuan Zhao took a deep breath, rubbed his eyes heavily with the back of his hand, and sat down again.

With Cen Baiyan not around, he could allow himself a little longer time to heal himself.

If he failed Cen Baiyan with a thousand points of indifference and cruelty, then he would use ten thousand, one hundred thousand, one million points of patience and sincerity to get Cen Baiyan back.

Xuan Zhao will never give up on what he is determined to do.

Before Cen Baiyan stepped out of the basement, there was a loud "bang" behind him, as if someone had fallen, and then the administrator whispered "Jesus".

His heart skipped a beat, thinking of Xuan Zhao's trembling left leg. Before his brain hesitated, his body had already reacted subconsciously, and immediately turned back with big strides.

Beside the bookshelf, a black student accidentally knocked down some dictionaries on the outside while tiptoeing to pick up the books, while Xuan Zhao was standing by the French window, putting his arms into the sleeves of his coat.

Seeing Cen Baiyan, Xuan Zhao was stunned for a moment, and then a cluster of joyful lights ignited in his pitch-black pupils. He smiled and asked, "Did you drop something? Is it this?"

He picked up the drama ticket on the table, reached out and handed it in Cen Baiyan's direction.

I don't know if it was Cen Baiyan's illusion, but he seems to have seen an indistinct watery light in Xuan Zhao's eyes.

Xuan Zhao's fingertips holding the ticket tightened slightly, and his Adam's apple moved up and down due to anticipation and tension.

—He's willing to give me a chance, isn't he?

Cen Boyan stared at Xuan Zhao for a few seconds, his expression was gloomy, and he couldn't tell what mood he was in at the moment.

After a while, Cen Baiyan closed his eyes, pursed his thin lips, and turned around without saying a word.

To this day, he is still affected by Xuan Zhao, Cen Baiyan, Cen Baiyan, you are really useless.

The small cluster of joyful light in Xuanzhao's eyes instantly dimmed.

--No chance.

"Bo Yan," Xuan Zhao squeezed the ticket tightly, "This ticket counts as yours being with me."

Cen Baiyan did not stop.

Xuanzhao's throat was sore, and it was obvious that he was about to be unable to stand up because of the pain, but he still tried his best to make his voice sound more relaxed and natural.

"The ticket I gave you will never expire or become invalid."