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That night, Qin Yan accidentally didn't stay in the classroom to study, he almost fled from the classroom after class with the attitude of a loser.

So much so that He Jiashi didn't even react at first, and after seeing his back, he hurriedly chased after him, and whispered to Qin Yan, "Wait for me."

Qin Yan didn't wait for him, and didn't even slow down his pace. Instead, he accelerated his pace even more.He desperately wants to go home, he desperately wants to get away from everything here.

He never wanted to stay in this classroom for even one more minute.

He could no longer stand his classmates and teachers looking at him kindly or maliciously with inquiring eyes, as if they were saying, "What's the matter with you?"

"How did you do so poorly in the exam?"

He Jiashi knew that he was in a bad mood, so he didn't bother him any more, and just walked behind him silently, with a distance of half a meter between the two of them.

When he got home, Qin Yan went back to the bedroom without taking off his clothes and washing socks. He didn't take out his exercise books and drafts from his schoolbag as usual, but sat there silently, as if he was letting himself go. But especially lonely.

He Jiashi's heart shrank, he walked over with Qin Yan's slippers, knelt down to take off his shoes for him, and covered his cold feet with his hands.

He didn't ask anything, didn't dare to ask anything.

The students in the class, whether out of curiosity or taking pleasure in other's misfortune, would always ask, "What happened to Qin Yan this time?" Qin Yan approached him and asked him how he could pass the exam like this.

Qin Yan was used to the central air conditioner outside, no matter how uncomfortable he felt, he just said in a good temper, "I don't know either."

he does not know.I don't know why he is not bad at studying, but he can't do the questions that others can easily do correctly, and he can't find the ideas that others can quickly find.

Naturally, it was impossible for He Jiashi to ask him "Why did you do so badly in the exam" like others did, he knew it very well, Qin Yan couldn't give him an answer.Or the answer itself could not solve Qin Yan's dilemma.

He knew Qin Yan's study status too well. Qin Yan didn't "let himself go" and didn't "distract". He worked harder than before, but he got the worst test result ever.

Qin Yan was stunned for a long time before he came back to his senses. He suddenly found that his feet were still covered by He Jiashi's hands. He felt a little embarrassed and pulled them back forcefully. He lowered his head and stuffed his feet into the warm cotton mop. .

He Jiashi was still squatting in front of him, "Qin Yan, take a bath and go to bed early."

After Qin Yan took a slow shower, he sat on the bed while his body was still wet, while He Jiashi took a dry towel and gently wiped his hair.

Qin Yan didn't speak, neither did He Jiashi, when Qin Yan's hair was wiped half dry, He Jiashi brought the hair dryer again.

The warm wind blew through the hair and fingers. It was obvious that He Jiashi did the most intimate thing between the two of them, but today it seemed particularly depressing and dull.

After taking care of Qin Yan, He Jiashi went to take a bath by himself.When the cold water flowed over his body, all he planned in his mind was what to say to Qin Yan later.

You must comfort him first and tell him that this is just a monthly exam, and that the grades will definitely go back up if you calm down.

I also want to advise him to rest more, the body is the capital of the revolution, and having a healthy body and mind is more important than anything else.

But when He Jiashi finished taking a shower and returned to the bedroom, he saw Qin Yan lying on the bed with his eyes closed.

He leaned over and casually rubbed the towel that Qin Yan had just wiped his hair twice on his head, while looking at Qin Yan's slightly trembling eyelashes.

He sat by the bed and said softly, "Qin Yan, let's talk."

Qin Yan still closed his eyes and fell asleep. He Jiashi looked at him. After a long time, he sighed deeply, got up and turned off the light, and said, "Go to sleep."

He knew that Qin Yan was in a bad mood, so he couldn't force Qin Yan.

Instead of lying on the bed, He Jia came to the balcony, lit a cigarette, and faced the silence and darkness outside the window, his heart suddenly felt a little cold.

He thought that he and Qin Yan could talk about everything, and he thought that as long as they were open and honest, there would be no grievances.

He didn't expect that with Qin Yan's relationship and feelings, there would be a day when he would refuse to communicate.

This thought made him suddenly frustrated and a little bit lost.

After that day, Qin Yan's words became less and less, and he became more tense.

He is like a machine that is constantly wound up, turning round and round.

The evening self-study of the provincial experiment lasted until 10:30, and most of the students in the class would spontaneously stay until [-]:[-], but Qin Yan was always close to [-]:[-], still sitting at the desk, "swish" writing Some formulas that He Jiashi didn't even want to read.

They are usually the last ones to leave in the entire building, and they are often chased out by the doorman with a flashlight.

And when he got home, Qin Yan didn't relax at all. He sat at the table, insisting on forcing himself to learn until twelve o'clock, then hurriedly washed and went to sleep.

Qin Yan doesn't like getting up early, but now it's not his turn to say whether he likes it or not.He got up 10 minutes earlier than before, sat at the desk, recited words, and did a reading.

In this monthly exam, not only Qin Yan's grades plummeted, but the average grade of the whole class was not as good as before.At the class meeting, Zhao Zhongya tried his best to ridicule them.

Now, not only is Niu Chao open-mouthed and closed-mouthed "the small town is a questioner", even Zhao Zhongya knows this "buzzword", pretending to be a pity, even claiming that they are a standard small town as a questioner, and saying that if they don't If you change yourself, after graduating and entering the society, you will only get worse and worse, all the way downhill.

The humiliation burned Qin Yan's body into burning pain, and his throat began to feel dry and astringent. He took a deep breath.He managed to calm himself down under Zhao Zhongya's contemptuous words.

What Zhao Zhongya said seemed to be referring to Qin Yan, but in fact it was not only Qin Yan.

He is targeting almost everyone in the "field class".Those who survived were nothing more than those locals from N city who took advantage of their privileges and insisted on inserting themselves into the "out-of-town class".

When Zhao Zhongya was spitting on the podium, Qin Yan was brushing up a set of English reading: Whenever Zhao Zhongya held a class meeting, Qin Yan could not learn anything except English and Chinese.

But this time, Qin Yan was not able to learn English and Chinese, which he was best at. He was so angry that his heart and liver trembled, so he put down his pen and stared fixedly at Zhao Zhongya in front of him.

Zhao Zhongya is naturally arrogant, and regards the identity label of "big city people" as the most important thing. The students from small cities are the most annoying: they are hardworking, tenacious, and diligent, and they don't care about anything except studying. To be able to make a fortune and to make a class transition, in Zhao Zhongya's eyes, these are nothing but idiotic dreams.

So he disliked Qin Yan, Wang Lili, and all the "little local people" in this class with "hanging heads and pricking buttocks". The harder they worked, the more Zhao Zhongya hated them.

A cavity of anger swam and burned in his body. He clenched his fists and lowered his head even more. There was only one thought left in his mind. He couldn't be underestimated by Zhao Zhongya, he didn't want to be underestimated by Zhao Zhongya.

Anxiety, nervousness, loss, frustration, and that unyielding energy made Qin Yan in an extremely sensitive and excited state.

Living in a modern city, it is naturally impossible for them to hang their heads on the beams and stab their buttocks, and there is no need to hack the walls to steal the light, but Qin Yan did exhaust all his energy and devoted himself to his studies.

And then, in the second monthly exam in the second semester of the third year of senior high school, he failed again, and got seventh in the class and grade 81.

The author says:

Hard to speak, on the verge of collapse