Leisurely with the wind

When the two returned home, it was already late at night, and there was basically no activity, so they could go to sleep after washing up.Xu Youran soaked in the bathtub in her room, and buried her head under the water in frustration. If possible, she really wanted to just drown herself like this.

Today's date should have been perfect, even if Chu Suifeng couldn't immediately cry and beg to date her as if possessed by an evil spirit, at least he should at least raise his favorability points angrily, right?

But I just stupidly said some things that I didn't have, and abruptly ruined my bright future, it was like being possessed by a ghost.

Xu Youran didn't understand why she said those words so stupidly.

After wiping a handful of water, Xu Youran got up and changed her clothes. If this continues, it will affect Chu Suifeng's sleep. She doesn't want to give Chu Suifeng a chance to have a reason to shut herself out. Once, then it will not be easy for her to stay in Chu Suifeng's room again.

Back in Chu Suifeng's room, although the door was not locked, Chu Suifeng had already laid down on the bed, and only a dim bedside lamp was turned on in the whole room.

Looking at Chu Suifeng who was sleeping with his eyes closed, Xu Youran sighed faintly, lay down carefully on one side, and then silently turned off the bedside lamp.

After all, it wasn't that they had been sharing the same bed for a day or two. Xu Youran knew that Chu Suifeng was not asleep by hearing the sound of breathing.

She suddenly felt a little depressed, isn't her attitude clear enough?She was a little irritable, a little worthless, and a little sad at the same time. It was the first time she fell in love with someone, the first time she wanted to contact a person so shamelessly, and the first time she put down everything to pursue a person. received such a treatment.

She, Xu Youran, is also a little princess. She grew up in rich clothes and was held in the palm of her hand. The only requirement her parents have for her is to take good care of herself, both in heart and body, and she is the same made.

Perhaps because of family factors, Xu Youran matured precociously at a very young age, and she was more mature than her peers in dealing with some problems.When she was young, children of the same age would chase stars. Although Xu Youran thought that this star was not bad, she never became that kind of brainless fan, nor did she spend a lot of money on any star. In her opinion, supporting a favorite star Movie tickets or concert tickets are considered support, but the premise is that it cannot affect your study and life.

In the previous school, there were some competitions for school girls and school flowers. She herself often dominated the school flower list, but she always regarded it as a joke list. What school grass and school flowers are just a group of children who have not grown up. For some girls The classmate's nympho-like behavior is even more dismissive. Do children know what affection is?Girls should love themselves, if a relationship can stand the passing of time, then it is worth your life and death, a little boy with a soft beard, what is it worth what you pay?

When I was older, when I went to college abroad, Xu Youran was more strict with herself. The living habits abroad were very different from those in China, especially the attitude towards relationships and adult activities made Xu Youran very disgusted.

Go to bed if you like it today, break up tomorrow, change after crying?

This seemed unbelievable to Xu Youran.

Although this kind of statement is somewhat one-sided, Xu Youran really couldn't understand the openness of the West, and it also made her unable to believe in the feelings she had while studying abroad, so Xu Youran kept her first love during the entire study period.

For Chu Suifeng, she really cared, but she didn't know what to do, her methods were clumsy, her thinking was clumsy, Xu Youran felt that she was not like herself anymore.

The more Xu Youran thought about it, the more wronged she became, and she couldn't help crying.

Chu Suifeng was not asleep, how could he not hear Xu Youran's crying next to him, even though the sound was very small, it was very clear in Chu Suifeng's ears, like the tip of a needle, stabbing Chu Suifeng's body every time Heart.

Sighing, Chu Suifeng turned around, hugged Xu Youran into his arms, and asked softly, "What's wrong? Why are you crying all of a sudden?"

Xu Youran stopped crying in surprise, this was the first time Chu Suifeng took the initiative to hug her, which surprised her but also made her very happy, feeling that all the grievances she had suffered before disappeared all of a sudden.

She further squeezed into Chu Suifeng's arms, hugged Chu Suifeng tightly, and said aggrievedly: "You still say, I have paid so much, and you are always so lukewarm. Don't feel wronged."

Chu Suifeng was covered in goosebumps, looked down at Xu Youran in his arms in surprise, and strongly doubted whether he had been fooled?In her eyes, although Xu Youran sometimes fights with Lin Keren like an ordinary girl, she looks like a strong woman in front of other people, especially in front of employees and subordinates, she is the king of hell ah!

She had never seen Xu Youran's appearance before, which made Chu Suifeng wonder, did he fall into a trap?

If Xu Youran knew that she was such an image in Chu Suifeng's eyes, she would be pissed to death, but she definitely didn't know now, in the dark environment, she couldn't even feel the shock in Chu Suifeng's eyes. I haven't seen it, so naturally I don't think so much.

"Feng, can you really not feel my heart? I really love you, what are you hesitating about? I can feel your occasional heartbeat for me, and I can also feel your slight hesitation, just I don't understand why. What's the problem, we can solve it together, but if you just say no, then I will never understand, you are the first person I fell in love with, I don't want this relationship Ended without illness."

Listening to Xu Youran's emotional words, it is impossible not to be moved at all, but Chu Suifeng didn't know what to say. After hesitating for a while, Chu Suifeng sighed and said: "You shouldn't fall in love with I, or you, may not understand whether this relationship is love. Xu Youran, the gap between us is not only the same gender, but also wealth, status, ability, and appearance. It can be said that we are the same No one is suitable. I admit that I have feelings for you. After all, you are such an excellent person. It is normal to like you. But what do I have? What I have is just your temporary affection for me , some are just your curiosity about me, some are just all I have, and this so-called all is no more than the tip of your iceberg. Sooner or later, your feelings for me will recede, your passion will dissipate, And I, I'm not sure whether the feelings I gave can be taken back, and I don't know how to face the rest of my life when the day you get bored comes. Xu Youran, your love, I can't afford it, your attempt , I don't have the slightest ability to deal with it, I'm scared."

This is the first time Xu Youran heard Chu Suifeng's sincere words. There were too many firsts tonight, which gave Xu Youran too many surprises. She was not afraid of Chu Suifeng's retreat, but what she was afraid of was Chu Suifeng. The silence of the wind.

"Feng, I understand your fear. Yes, everything you said is very reasonable, but are you really willing? You like someone, but you reject this wish because you consider the reality of the possible future. I think, The future is not based on imagination, but on your own. Everything you say may become a reality. No matter how affectionate the vows I make now, they will not stand the passing of time. Only by persevering under the witness of time, That is the truest vow. I like you, I love you, as you said, I don't understand this feeling at all, but at least at this moment, this feeling is sincere and passionate. What is the future, we No one knows, but it would be too stupid to give up everything for an unknown future. Give me a chance, and give yourself a chance, even if it really fails, at least we still have this Fiery memories, if there is no failure, then we have become the biggest winners in the gamble of fate, because we have bet on the only partner in life once."

Chu Suifeng was silent. The firm determination she once had was shattered at this moment. She could deceive everyone, even herself, but she knew very well that her firm determination was like a castle made of glass, which would shatter when knocked. .

Every time she vetoed herself, she hoped that someone would refute her and give her the courage and motivation to persevere, but no, there was no such person around her, only Xu Youran kept persevering.From her point of view, she and Xu Youran are already on the chessboard, and she needs someone outside the chessboard to tell her how to move, and the only person she can ask is He Zhengqing.

After He Zhengqing approved of her actions, she stood on the rational side and desperately suppressed her emotions, but in fact, in Xu Youran's scorching behavior, what she did was like placing a fire next to the fire. The barrel, even she herself didn't know when it would explode.

She never had any expectations for her own future. Apart from her despair of life, it was more because of her low self-esteem.

She tried her best to hide her inferiority complex every day, but she knew very well that she couldn't deceive her heart.

She knew that this inferiority complex would become the biggest problem between her and Xu Youran, no matter how much they loved each other, sooner or later, this inferiority complex would break this love and bring all the good things back to reality.

Chu Suifeng has been suppressed for so long that she even forgot that she is an ordinary person with emotions, joys, anger, sorrows and joys.For the first time and the only time, Chu Suifeng told himself, try it for a while, let's be presumptuous for a while, just this time, just give yourself this chance.

Chu Suifeng thought so, and did the same. She hugged the person in her arms tightly, as if she wanted to melt him into her arms. She hoped to use this method to tell him that her love was no worse than She is rare, and his own feelings are equally hot, but the phrase "I love you" is too heavy for Chu Suifeng, and he doesn't even have the courage to say it.

Chu Suifeng's reaction surprised Xu Youran, and she tried her best to respond to Chu Suifeng's embrace.

"You agreed? Did you agree? Feng, tell me, tell me that you agree, that you are willing to be with me." Xu Youran tried his best to stretch his body, holding Chu Suifeng's face with both hands, even in the dark At night, she could also see the light in Chu Suifeng's eyes.

Chu Suifeng grabbed Xu Youran's hand with a smile, and pressed it tightly to his face, "Yes, yes, I agree, I agree to go crazy with you once. You are right, I should give myself a chance , I don’t want to suppress my feelings for you anymore. No matter how long the freshness of this feeling can last, I want to be crazy with you just like this. I don’t understand my feelings, but I think, I love you Yes, Xu Youran, I love you very much."

Xu Youran couldn't help crying again, she didn't know how long she had been waiting for this answer, nor how long she had been wronged for this answer, she only knew that she wanted to cry at this moment.

Seeing Xu Youran crying in her arms, Chu Suifeng also burst into tears, Xu Youran was entangled in sadness, did she feel better?Intense love can only be transformed into self-doubt again and again, and strong inferiority complex denying everything about oneself time and time again.The person I most desire is by my side, but I have to push her away from my side again and again, and then I am alone in despair and sadness for the future without the other party.

During this period of time, Chu Suifeng suffered no less torture than Xu Youran, and even more intensely than Xu Youran.

In the dark, Chu Suifeng found Xu Youran's face, and then stroked Xu Youran's facial features with his fingers. When he found Xu Youran's lips, Chu Suifeng gently approached Xu Youran, and slowly kissed her. The altar she coveted for so long.

Chu Suifeng's kiss was very clumsy, but also very gentle, little by little, carefully, as if he was afraid of accidentally frightening the person in his arms.

In fact, Xu Youran was indeed taken aback. From the moment Chu Suifeng kissed her, Xu Youran's mind went blank. She never thought that Chu Suifeng would do that.

But with Chu Suifeng's careful probing again and again, Xu Youran suddenly understood what she should do, and she also cautiously responded to each of Chu Suifeng's kisses, and then slowly deepened the kiss. The simple collision of lips turned into entanglement of words, and even his arms unconsciously wrapped around Chu Suifeng's neck, so as to make the kiss deeper.

I don't know how long it took, and the two slowly separated. There are some things that really don't need to be learned. In practice, the two learned how to breathe in the middle, making this kiss far-reaching and long-lasting. trend.

But the two still stopped. In the darkness, their foreheads were pressed against their foreheads, laughing foolishly for each other's clumsiness, and at the same time for the sweetness in their hearts.

Embracing again, suddenly everything seemed so unreal. Obviously, a few hours ago, one person was still struggling for an unknown waiting, and the other was trying to resist the truth in his heart. For a moment, the two possessed each other so naturally, as if everything was like a dream.

Chu Suifeng squeezed herself quietly, the intense pain told her that all this was true, she wrapped her arms around Xu Youran and hugged Xu Youran into her arms, her cheek was pressed against the top of Xu Youran's head, smelling Xu Youran's body of fragrance.

In fact, she has always liked the smell of Xu Youran's body, but if she can smell it, she feels like a pervert, and the scent that occasionally drifts past disturbs her heart like a cat's claw. This time, she can finally enjoy this naturally. At this moment, she hopes that it will become a permanent daily routine, and there will be no change in the slightest until the day when her gray hair turns gray.