faint star

A few months after graduating with a Ph.D., Xu Zhiwei's life became more and more stable.He is single now, as long as he takes good care of one person and one cat, it is enough.With small savings in hand, stable income, and not thinking about buying a house, it is considered more than enough.

I put most of my energy into work and patients every day, work diligently, and fall asleep as soon as I touch the pillow at night. I have less thoughts than before and sleep soundly.

It's just that the summer has passed, and the weight is still lighter.Because of the rare high temperature this year, he still suffered from a stomach problem. It was difficult at this time, but everything else was fine.

By the end of August, the weather is not so hot.It was raining heavily outside this day, and it was impossible to do outdoor activities. Xu Zhiwei was idle at home, and thought that he hadn’t bathed Maimai for a while, so he carried the cat into the bathroom, fetched a basin of water, and planned to give it a good wash.

Mai Mai is good at other times, except for taking a bath.Every time I took a shower, I struggled and howled, splashing water all over my body.Every time Xu Zhiwei finished washing it, he had to take a quick shower himself.

Originally, Xu Zhiwei was ready to fight with Mai Mai, but he didn't expect the cat to be a little abnormal today. It was much more peaceful in the bath than before, and it was finished in a while.Xu Zhiwei wrapped it up in a big bath towel, and complained while wiping the water: "Why don't you take a bath like this every time?"

Mai Mai raised his head, looked at Xu Zhiwei with big round eyes, and meowed twice.

Xu Zhiwei felt that it understood.

That night, Maimai was about to go to bed again, but couldn't get up after jumping twice, drooping eyes and frowning with an unhappy expression.Seeing that it was anxious, Xu Zhiwei hugged it to the bed anyway.He was lying on the bed reading a book, Mai Mai nestled in his arms.It was windy and rainy outside, but quiet and comfortable indoors, with one person and one cat.Xu Zhiwei read two pages of the book and smelled the freshly washed cat.

Mai Mai has always been very obedient, but recently Xu Zhiwei can feel that not only is it getting better and better, but it may also be getting older.

Only half a month after Xu Zhiwei came up with this idea, Mai Mai fell ill.Lying in the nest early in the morning, listless, refusing to eat, tilting his head and making a weak voice.Xu Zhiwei was so scared that he didn't have time to eat breakfast early in the morning, so he rushed to the pet hospital with the cat in his arms.It was cold in the morning, so he could only spread Maimai's favorite old fleece towel in the cat bag to make it as comfortable as possible.

In the evening, he hurried to the pet hospital. The doctor told him that the cat had ascites. After removing some of the ascites, the condition was slightly better than in the morning, but he also gently reminded: "You cat is not young."

Xu Zhiwei felt uncomfortable for a while: "Well, I'm fourteen or fifteen years old."

He knew what the doctor meant, to vaccinate him and prepare him mentally.

But Xu Zhiwei refused to give up.After more than half a month of treatment, he spent more than 1 yuan, and he was a little numb when he pulled the bill.Even if it was just a short period of time for Mai Mai, he still felt it was worth it.

At the end of this month, Xu Zhiwei took Mai Mai home.It happened to be the weekend, the weather was beautiful and the sun was shining brightly.Xu Zhiwei washed his clothes early in the morning, tidied them up, and put the accumulated

After doing all the housework, he cooked a piece of chicken breast for Maimai, tore it apart carefully, and mixed some steamed salmon in it.

When Xu Zhiwei brought out the bowl from the kitchen, Mai Mai stood up tremblingly from the nest, but he could no longer grab his trouser leg to reach the bowl as in the past.

"Don't worry." Seeing that it still wanted to eat, Xu Zhiwei was both happy and sad, hugged it in his arms, and took a small spoon to feed it bit by bit.But Mai Mai just licked it a few times and didn't eat it.

Xu Zhiwei tried again, but still couldn't feed it.He didn't force it anymore, just hugged Maimai to bask in the sun by the window, stroking it gently.

In the evening, Mai Mai left.

Xu Zhiwei felt empty in his heart, but things had to be done.He contacted pet cremation and made an appointment.Then wrap it one last time in Mama's favorite towel.When wrapping it, I moved lightly and slowly, carefully, and only after wrapping it did I realize that it turned out to be such a small ball.

While waiting for the car to arrive, he couldn't help but wonder if it was because he bathed Maimai that day that he got sick.Could it be that he moved after graduation, that's why Mai Mai got sick.If you don't move, can it live longer?Thinking about it, all kinds of thoughts came out, and the tears couldn't stop.

When the car was approaching, he hurriedly washed his face and went downstairs.When the car went to the destination, he just felt at a loss.

After finishing the work, Xu Zhiwei took the small box from the staff, feeling that it was not heavy.Perhaps it is to comfort the owner's feeling of losing a pet, and the packaging is simple and cute, not so heavy.He suddenly remembered something he regretted. He was busy with his graduation thesis this year, so he rarely took videos or photos for Mai Mai. It would be great if he could take more.

Take the subway on the way back.When he got out of the subway station, he realized that he hadn't had dinner yet. When he walked back to the neighborhood, there was a row of small shops, most of which sold food. It was past nine o'clock, but there were still people eating in twos and threes.Supper brings the aroma of food.

He ordered a bowl of wontons to take home.When he got home, he saw that the special meal he made for Mai Mai today was still left.There is still a package of unopened cat food and some canned food and snacks at home.He swept the small sofa with his hands—Mai Mai's cat hair was still stuck to it, and they were still basking in the sun together this afternoon.In the past, Mai Mai liked to lie on the window sill and stare blankly. He would shake his head and shake his head when he saw small animals passing by occasionally.

Xu Zhiwei thought that he would never keep a cat again.

The next morning, Xu Zhiwei got up as usual, he washed Maimai's bowl, and for the first time he didn't fill it up in the morning.The world has not changed, he still has to go to work, carefully see patients and prescribe medicines.When he came home at night, he picked a pot of cactus from a flower shop near the hospital.

Time passed day by day, and he finally got used to Mai Mai's disappearance, but occasionally walked away quickly when he accidentally wandered into the pet section while shopping in the supermarket.

New Year's time,

A few people get together to go to the island to play.Teacher Su started by booking a homestay on the island, which is enough for five or six people.Xu Zhiwei also wanted to go out to relax, so he made an appointment to set off together.

The location of the homestay is very good, you can see the beach and sea view from the room.They don't rush the schedule, they don't go to the Internet celebrity spots to check in, just a few old friends casually wandering around, looking for some delicious food that the locals often eat.

The next day they went to the cultural and creative market.Xu Zhiwei wanted to pick out some distinctive little gifts to take back.After being tired from shopping, a few people went to a coffee shop near the market for a drink.

After entering the store and sitting down, Su Pei praised: "The owner of this store is very good at decoration."

Xu Zhiwei was about to speak, when he looked up, he saw a photo of his ex-boyfriend hanging on the wall in a metal frame, with Gu Heng's autograph underneath.It does not appear to be a print, but an original purchased.

Teacher Su followed Xu Zhiwei's gaze and saw the photo.

Knowing that Xu Zhiwei and Gu Heng had a past, he immediately turned his eyes away without mentioning it, and just said: "This place looks good, I hope the food is also delicious."

Another friend who was traveling with him didn't know about Xu Zhiwei and Gu Heng.He also saw the conspicuous photo, and couldn't help feeling: "I haven't seen Director Gu for a long time. I heard that he is working on a powerful script and a big production. Look at him, he has everything at such a young age. It's more popular than people."

Su Pei changed the topic: "Look at what you want to eat, I'm going to starve to death."

Xu Zhiwei smiled at him, thanking him for his tenderness.But now he only feels far away from Gu Heng, and the memory will be like this after a long time, as if he is withdrawn to observe other people's affairs. The 25-year-old and the current him are no longer the same person.

He just suddenly remembered that there had been one or two episodes - in summer afternoon, not long after Gu Heng picked up Maimai, his leg was still injured, so he came to help feed Maimai the medicine.He fed and petted the cat, and met Gu Heng's eyes.Gu Heng's hair was cut short, his eyes were sharp and enthusiastic, and there was a high-pitched cicada's cry outside the window.He deliberately avoided Gu Heng's gaze, and the cat jumped off his lap lightly.

In the memory that has been dimmed to gray, such golden fragments occasionally flashed, proving that they were indeed soaked in the hot summer passion/desire.

Xu Zhiwei took another look at Gu Heng's work on the wall.

Now their contact is severed, and Mai Mai is no more.Only he is on this southern island, occasionally encountering some fragments.

Thinking of this, Xu Zhiwei suddenly thought - Gu Heng should still have a lot of photos of Mai Mai, he can try to find him to get them back.

This idea only flashed in his mind for a moment, and he quickly vetoed it.No need, no point.

Another few months passed, and all was well.A colleague who raised a cat gave birth to a kitten, and asked him if he wanted to take one, but he declined.

The cat doesn't want to keep it anymore, and the relationship can start again, but he has been single for too long and seems to have fallen

Into the single inertia.

What's even more amazing is that I don't know if it's to punish him for rejecting someone as good as Xiaomeng. Since he graduated with a Ph.D., his peach blossoms have suddenly broken.No one took the initiative to confess his love to him anymore, and he couldn't even meet anyone with a hint of it.

Of course he doesn't believe in any "metaphysics". All developments have their inevitable reasons.

His age is here.People of the same age who pursue stability almost all have partners, and most of the rest have not played enough.There are fewer people who are suitable for him. If you want to fall in love, you can only work harder.

On the weekend before Qingming Festival, Scarlett called Xu Zhiwei and invited him to have dinner on Sunday.

"Okay, who else?" Xu Zhiwei said that he came to book a restaurant.

Scarlett smiled and said, "I'm here to invite, just me and my husband, and one of his friends, plus you four."

The dinner was good, and so was Scarlett's husband's friends, who looked very refined.After dinner, the Scarletts left first, leaving the two of them alone.

The other party is very talkative, and is also very interested in Xu Zhiwei's work.Xu Zhiwei chatted with the two of them for more than half an hour, the chat was full of enthusiasm, and they drank another drink.In fact, he is like a mirror in his heart, the more he chats, the more he feels that he and the other party will not call.The only reason why he left was because Scarlett had introduced him.

By the end of the chat, both of them were tired.The other party offered to send Xu Zhiwei home, implying that if possible, they could go to the hotel to have a rest first.Xu Zhiwei felt relieved, and just said that he was a conservative person, so he rejected him.This time the blind date is over.

Not long after, Su Pei invited him to a party again, which was scheduled for this Sunday night.Su Pei said that this was a gathering held by friends from the publishing house, and they booked a hall in the hotel, and many of the people who came were from the film and television industry, so they asked Zhiwei to come and have fun.

Su Pei said again: "This time someone introduced you, you must come. I think you are very suitable."

Xu Zhiwei recalled the unsuccessful blind date last time, and cringed in his heart, like subconsciously trying to avoid a needle prick, and almost said he didn't want to go.

But he also said to his friends that he wanted to know more people.

He agreed: "Okay, I will definitely go."