Still tide

Chen Chao didn't answer his question directly, Miao Jiayan grabbed his sleeve, looked him in the eyes and confirmed again: "Are you coming back, Brother Chao?"

Chen Chao asked: "Aren't you allowed to go back?"

"No," Miao Jiayan said, "don't come back."

Miao Jiayan seldom said "no" so intuitively. When facing Chen Chao, he always said "yes" and "okay" the most.

This time it was straightforward to refuse.

Chen Chao raised his eyebrows and laughed: "You're not even allowed to go home?"

Miao Jiayan didn't smile at all, her expression was serious, and she even nodded a little seriously.

Chen Chao rubbed the back of his head with his arms around him, and said, "Do your job."

In this matter, Miao Jiayan showed a rare persistence.

In the next few days, he always looked for opportunities to talk about this with Chen Chao. Sometimes when Chen Chao was talking to him about something else, Miao Jiayan would talk about it again as soon as he changed his mind.

Chen Chao was helpless: "Isn't your mind full of this now?"

Miao Jiayan took his hand and walked behind grandma with him.

Chen Chao pinched his fingers to play, and felt that there was a place on his fingers that was not smooth, and the strips were a bit rough.Chen Chao looked up and asked, "How did you do it?"

"It was rubbed on the shelf." Miao Jiayan knocked her hands on the shelf in the morning, the back of her hand and fingers were scratched, the skin was not broken, but she could feel small wounds.

Chen Chao asked, "Does it hurt?"

"It doesn't hurt, it doesn't..." Miao Jiayan originally wanted to say "I don't feel it", but she swallowed it halfway, and changed it, "... a little bit."

Some children don't know how to act like a baby, and they are not very proficient when they come once in a while, which seems a bit clumsy.

Chen Chao grabbed his hand and touched it to his mouth, bowed his head and smiled.

Miao Jiayan knew that Chen Chao was joking at him, and thought that she had to be ready before she opened her mouth next time.

It is very rare for these two young couples who have been living apart for a long time to stay together every day and live their own busy lives, it is like a short period of time stolen.

This kind of life is very good, and there is a kind of peace and freedom.

Miao Jiayan went to a meeting for an afternoon today, and came back to eat with grandma in the evening, and gave her a massage for a while.After tidying up grandma and letting her lie down to sleep, Grandpa Miao was whispering to Grandma Miao before Miao Jiayan went upstairs, Grandma Miao nodded in agreement.

Grandpa Miao was originally an old man who didn't talk much, but since Grandma Miao was sick and couldn't talk to him as often as before, Grandpa Miao became talkative.At home, I can often hear Grandpa Miao talking to Grandma Miao. After decades of being an old couple, even though Grandma Miao sometimes slurs her speech, Grandpa Miao can still understand what she is expressing from her eyes and simple movements. .

Miao Jiayan talked to them and went upstairs with her mobile phone.

Chen Chao had just turned off the computer, and was sitting by the bed answering messages, waiting to take a shower after returning.

Miao Jiayan came over to help him put away the computer, and the mobile phone charger was also plugged in by the bed. Chen Chao looked up at him, stretched out his hand to stop him, and pulled Miao Jiayan to sit on his lap.

Miao Jiayan was startled by his movement, and sat down following his strength, while Chen Chao rubbed his chin on his back.

"Are you done?" Miao Jiayan asked.

Chen Chao put his arm around him and touched his stomach: "Grandma is asleep?"

"Well, I'm going to bed soon, I'm talking to grandpa." Miao Jiayan replied with her head tilted.

Miao Jiayan doesn't often use perfume, but her hair and clothes are always fragrant.Chen Chao pressed his face against him, smelling the faint fragrance in his hair while sending messages.Miao Jiayan sat obediently and let him hug her. She didn't leave or play with her mobile phone, so she just sat with him.

Most of the time, Chen Chao felt that he was like a small animal. When he hugged him, he would hug him quietly for a while, and from time to time, he would respond with a kiss on the cheek.

It is easy for people to calm down and their hearts become soft.

After a while, Miao Jiayan wanted to get up, but Chen Chao didn't let go.

"Am I sinking?" Miao Jiayan asked with a smile, "I'm afraid your legs are numb, how about I sit on the other side?"

Chen Chao raised his leg and padded him up, not taking it seriously: "You only weigh a few pounds."

Miao Jiayan still sat on the other side, looking down at Chen Chao typing.

Chen Chao didn't avoid him, he typed quickly with one hand, and kept his other hand idle, just hugging him.

Miao Jiayan looked at Chen Chao's short hair and raised her hand to touch it.In Chen Chao’s overseas photos, his roommates shave each other’s heads. After shaved, the boys really rely on their faces to support them.Chen Chao has always had this hairstyle since he left the country, and Miao Jiayan is very used to seeing it, and privately thinks that her boyfriend is the most handsome.

At this moment, Miao Jiayan looked at Chen Chao from a slightly higher position, and could see the top of his head, the corner of his forehead, and a little bit of the bridge of his nose, which was very strong.

He suddenly lowered his head and kissed the side of his forehead that he could see, and then rubbed the tip of his nose.

Chen Chao only laughed softly and did not respond to him.

Miao Jiayan tilted her head again and kissed him on the cheek.

Chen Chao responded to the message indifferently, and Miao Jiayan continued to sit and watch him after kissing him.

Chen Chao replied the last message: I'll go to bed first, I have something to say tomorrow.

After sending, he threw the phone on the pillow next to him.

Just as Miao Jiayan was about to stand up, she was caught off guard by Chen Chao.

"What are you doing here all at once?" Chen Chao asked with a smile as he walked with him in his arms, "You can't talk to me when I reply to the message, can you?"

Miao Jiayan was taken aback by his sudden movement, her heart was beating wildly, her eyes were wide open.

"My Miaoer is promising." Chen Chao walked with him very easily, not even panting.

Miao Jiayan was carried to the bathroom by Chen Chao, looked outside, and said, "I didn't bring my pajamas."

"You don't need to wear it." Chen Chao put him on the washing machine and sat, "Wait, I'll adjust the water temperature."

Chen Chao likes to hug him very much, and every time the two of them want to take a bath after finishing their intimate affairs, Chen Chao will hug him.

The two took a shower together, and Miao Jiayan was carried back by Chen Chao and stuffed into bed.

He moved in to make room for Chen Chao.

Chen Chao didn't wear his upper body and pajama pants on his lower body. He went to turn off the lights, and threw himself on Miao Jiayan when he came back.

In the dark, Chen Chao kissed Miao Jiayan's jawline, and called "wife" with a half breath.

Miao Jiayan's eyes hadn't adapted to the darkness yet, so she couldn't see him clearly, so she closed her eyes to feel the moisture on Chen Chao's body that hadn't completely dried out.

The half-dry moisture was transpired by the gradually rising body temperature, wrapping Miao Jiayan gently.

However, it's even unbelievable to say that they haven't really done it yet.

He hadn't even tried it, Chen Chao hadn't thought about it since the beginning, the natural needs and desires between lovers had never been fulfilled between them.

Miao Jiayan hugged Chen Chao's shoulders, and asked him with a trembling voice, "Brother Chao, do you want to...?"

Chen Chaofa bit his earlobe hard, but said nothing.

The rigidity and so-called "male chauvinism" in Chen Chao's bones are also clearly reflected in this incident.

At some point, he was not like the young people today. He had the advantages and disadvantages of Chen Guangda and Jiang Li, and those characteristics that were not considered advantages and disadvantages.

For example, put pressure on yourself, such as sense of responsibility, such as rationality.

For example, he feels that before the two of them end up in different places, it is not really settled, so some things cannot be done.

If Miao Jiayan was a girl, Chen Chao must be married before touching him.

Miao Jiayan, a native and conservative rural kid, was much more open-minded than him. Miao Jiayan made all the preparations more than once, or even more than ten times, but never succeeded.

It didn't work before, and now the two of them live in Miao Jiayan's small room, it's even more impossible.Grandpa Miao and grandma Miao are all there downstairs, and Miao Jiayan sometimes gets up at night to take a look, and there are a lot of things during the day, so they won't make a fuss too late.

Miao Jiayan took the wet wipes and paper towels and cleaned up with a blushing face. Chen Chao went to the closet to get him pajamas and underwear, and Miao Jiayan put them on slowly.

Chen Chao didn't really enjoy himself just now, and he couldn't let go. Later, it was Miao Jiayan who blushed and said a few unspeakable words in his ear, and Chen Chao bit his shoulder and put it on his stomach.

Miao Jiayan changed her clothes and asked Chen Chao in a low voice, "Are you comfortable, Brother Chao?"

Chen Chao smiled and replied, "Didn't you wipe everything?"

"I know, I didn't ask... this," Miao Jiayan lay on her side, looking at Chen Chao's silhouette, "I mean you..."

He was a little embarrassed to say, Chen Chao took the initiative to answer: "You want to ask me if I'm happy."

Miao Jiayan said, "Yes."

"It's cool," Chen Chao's voice of laughing at this moment was a little ear-burning, Miao Jiayan touched his ears, and heard Chen Chao ask, "What are you thinking about?"

Miao Jiayan then asked softly: "Then when can we... finish it?"

Chen Chao closed his eyes and said, "Wait for me to come back."

"Come back" is a sensitive word now, and when Miao Jiayan heard it, her nerves subconsciously pricked up.

He blinked and asked, "When will you be back?"

Chen Chao really liked Miao Jiayan chatting with him in such a low voice every night, which made him feel very gentle.

"Come back early, okay?" Chen Chao asked.

Miao Jiayan immediately asked, "Why?"

Chen Chao said, "No reason."

Miao Jiayan said, "Not good, Brother Chao."

Chen Chao hasn't had a good chat with Miao Jiayan about this matter.

The two three-years that were originally planned before leaving, have not been completed for one three-year period, and the remaining three years have not yet started.

Before leaving, Miao Jiayan didn't intend to stop him in the slightest. He readily accepted the six-year long-distance journey he was about to face without a single complaint.During the process, Miao Jiayan always reported the good news but not the bad news, she picked up pleasant words and never mentioned any troubles.Miao Jiayan never complained about the time difference of more than ten hours, and she talked softly every day through her mobile phone to coax her lover to sleep.

I didn't dare to say that I was suddenly sick and hospitalized. When I saw my boyfriend open the door of the ward and came in, I was not surprised at the first time, but shocked and panic was written all over my face.

He never seemed to ask for things from anyone, no matter who they were.

The one who knows him best must be Chen Chao.

Chen Chao sighed in the dark, and asked him, "Why didn't you let me come back?"

Miao Jiayan was thinking about what to say.After thinking about it for a long time, I finally frowned slightly and said, "You didn't decide that way."

"Don't let him change his mind?" Chen Chao asked.

Miao Jiayan didn't speak, just shook her head.

Chen Chao could hear the sound of his hair rubbing against the pillow when he shook his head, and felt very helpless.

He didn't want to talk about it with Miao Jiayan at such a time, the young couple who had just been intimate should hug and sleep.

"Are you sleepy?"

"Not sleepy." Miao Jiayan obviously didn't want to just sleep like this, she kept looking at him with her eyes open.

Chen Chao was helplessly stared at by him, so he sat up.

Miao Jiayan also stood up, and heard Chen Chao say: "You really don't want me to come back."

Miao Jiayan said "hmm".

Chen Chao looked at him and asked, "It will be fine for another three years like this, and it will be fine for a few years, right?"

Miao Jiayan thought for a while and said, "Yes."

Chen Chao let him say "yes" so that he didn't know how to say it. After a long time, he chuckled lightly and said, "It's really great."

Chen Chao lifted the quilt and got out of bed to turn on the small desk lamp on the table. Turn on the lowest brightness so as not to dazzle the eyes.

Miao Jiayan was wearing white pajamas, her hair was a little messed up by the two of them just now, but when she turned on the light, it looked like it had fringes, and she felt a warm and homely feeling.Chen Chao stretched out his hand to straighten it out for him.

Miao Jiayan had already sensed Chen Chao's emotions very quickly, and he looked up at Chen Chao with some embarrassment.

"I've had enough of long-distance relationships." Chen Chao stood by the bed, lowered his head and looked at him.

Miao Jiayan was stunned for a moment, and Chen Chao continued: "I don't want to live another three years, I'm tired."

Once Chen Chao really spoke with emotion, Miao Jiayan would not dare to say anything.

But this time, after being silent for a few minutes, Miao Jiayan took the initiative to hold Chen Chao's hand, and said to him, "No, Brother Chao."

Chen Chao asked, "Why?"

Miao Jiayan pursed her lips and said, "Isn't it good for us to be like this now? I won't make you tired in the future, I'm sure I'll be fine."

"How can you be better?" Chen Chao touched his face, "You don't even dare to tell me that you are sick and grandma is sick, how can you be better? I will be tired for you."

Miao Jiayan was anxious to explain, but Chen Chao asked, "Can you ask me a little bit?"

His movements and tone were very gentle, but Miao Jiayan still knew that he was angry.

"What if I don't want to stay anymore? I can't bear it anymore and want to go back to my country, okay?" Chen Chao asked again.

Miao Jiayan thought for a while and said, "That's fine..."

"The working environment is different when I come back," Chen Chao said.

Miao Jiayan comforted him in turn: "That's okay...take your time."

Chen Chao laughed immediately.

Miao Jiayan didn't know why he was smiling, but he was a little scared.Chen Chao asked him sentence by sentence without knowing the answer, and he didn't know how to answer it correctly.

He wanted to hug Chen Chao, but Chen Chao let him hug him.

"So you are afraid that I will come back, and it has nothing to do with Fa's development or anything else." Chen Chao looked down at him and said calmly, "You just don't want me to come back because of you."

Miao Jiayan did not deny it, he even nodded and said, "Yes."

Chen Chao asked "why" again, this was the third time he asked tonight.

Miao Jiayan clutched the edge of Chen Chao's pajamas, and said honestly, "I can't afford...Brother Chao."

Under Chen Chao's persuasive questioning, Miao Jiayan uttered the phrase "I can't afford it".

This is the most sincere thought in Miao Jiayan's heart, and she has already said it out.

Chen Chao asked: "Because you can't afford it, you would rather keep talking with me like this than accept me taking a step towards you, can you?"

The stubbornness in Miao Jiayan's bones resurfaced again, and he nodded under Chen Chao's gaze.

Chen Chao laughed angrily, he looked at Miao Jiayan, he was definitely angry, but there was more than just anger in his eyes.

He looked a little frustrated and sad, and asked Miao Jiayan in a deep voice, "What if I never come back?"

Miao Jiayan stopped breathing for a while, and closed her eyes.

"say."

Miao Jiayan still didn't say anything.

"After working for three years, how about I stay there with my card?" Chen Chao asked, "Are you okay?"

Miao Jiayan's eyes were red, and she wanted to speak, but her throat seemed to be blocked again.

"I know you can do it, so you won't say no." Chen Chao said.

Time and space seem to have stopped at the same time, and the outside of the window is pitch black, as if covered by a black cloth.Inside the window were two people who were silently confronting each other, standing and sitting, only their gradually unsteady breathing could be heard in the room.

"You don't ask for anything, and you agree to everything." Chen Chao said, "You are too good to be true."

Miao Jiayan listened to him, tightly clutching his clothes.The room that was very warm just now gradually became colder, and Miao Jiayan's slender wrists were trembling slightly.

Chen Chao frowned, and said to him: "You make me feel like I can't catch you."