saturation concentration

Chapter 34 Why I Don't Want to Live

Sui Cannong didn't have time to think about it, because he suddenly smelled a bad burnt smell.

The beef has been simmered for too long, and the potato cubes are almost turning into mud. Fortunately, the fire was turned off in a timely manner, and the final product looks okay.

Ji Ling did not break his promise, he returned home at [-]:[-].Holding two heavy books in his hands, Sui Cannong felt that his mood looked pretty good.

Together they finished the pot of brisket with potatoes.

Sui Cannong felt that he could actually control the heat well, the beef was not particularly old, and the taste should be pretty good.

After all, Ji Ling was sitting opposite him. He held the bowl and ate many pieces of beef quietly.

Sui Cannong ate faster, he put down his chopsticks first.

"I watered the flowers just now." Sui Cannong hesitated, then said, "Then I also watered your pot, so you don't need to water it tonight."

Ji Ling looked at Sui Cannong and nodded.

Sui Cannong still couldn't help asking: "What is that pot you raised, is it a lemon?"

Ji Ling paused and said, "Yes."

Sui Cannong let out an oh, his expression became thoughtful.Ji Ling paused for a moment, and then put down her chopsticks.

"You may not remember," Ji Ling raised her eyes and said, "Actually, you gave me this bowl of lemons."

Sui Cannong laughed: "So it's really true?"

"I was still not sure just now." Sui Cannong thought about it for a while, and then said, "I remember that the lemon was almost half dead at that time. I didn't expect that after so many years, you have been raising it so well."

Ji Ling was quiet for a moment, and said, "In that winter, it really couldn't make it through."

"Fortunately, it held on and produced fruit once." He added, "But only one fruit."

Sui Cannong let out an ah, and said, "That's pretty good."

Ji Ling looked into Sui Cannong's eyes, hummed lightly, then lowered his head for a while, and resumed eating the rice at the bottom of the bowl.

Sui Cannong was stunned for a moment, he always felt that something was not right, and also felt that Ji Ling just wanted to say something more.

Ji Ling lowered her eyes and slowly stuffed a mouthful of rice into her mouth.

The winter in City C was very dry and cold that year. The lemons in this pot lost many leaves. At that time, Ji Ling was very anxious. He checked a lot of information and changed many different brands of fertilizers and various soils for the lemons.

Ji Ling knew that it was just a pot of lemons, and Sui Cannong actually wouldn't think of anything.But he still wants to tell Sui Cannong that he has been raising it with great care.

The two of them took turns doing housework on weekdays, and today it was Ji Ling's turn to do the dishes.

Sui Cannong found that no matter what she did, Ji Ling seemed to be able to achieve absolute concentration.Even when washing dishes, he would wear gloves and carefully wipe every corner of the dishes.

Although it is said that they are doing housework in rotation, Sui Cannong is naturally not really idle. He stands aside and helps Ji Ling rinse the dishes. .

Ji Ling wiped the washed bowls one by one, and neatly stacked them on the dish rack, then he turned around and looked at Sui Cannong's face.

Sui Cannong coughed in embarrassment, and then heard Ji Ling say calmly: "It's okay, today is Saturday."

Sui Cannong really likes Ji Ling's eyes.

At first glance, I felt that those eyes were cold and beautiful, but the eyelashes were relatively long, and the curvature of the double eyelids was also beautiful, so it gave people a quiet and clean feeling.

Because the skin around the eyes is a little thin, the eyelids will reveal a faint pink color when they are emotional.

But no matter at any time, Ji Ling's eyes are very clear, he is actually soft and tough, but Sui Cannong always feels that there is something in his eyes that he can't grasp.

After the end, Sui Cannong wrapped Ji Ling's waist from behind, and the two lay quietly on the bed for a while.

When he was a little drowsy, Sui Cannong heard Ji Ling call his name.

Sui Cannong responded, and Ji Ling asked softly, "How do you plan to celebrate your birthday this year?"

"Oh, isn't my birthday next Saturday?" Sui Cannong thought for a while, and said, "Thomas and the others insist on having a small party, I can't stop them, so I should go out to get together on Friday night Get together."

"He should go talk to you tomorrow." Sui Cannong said with a smile, "You have to agree, I have been looking forward to Teacher Xiao Ji's gift for a long time."

Ji Ling was silent and did not speak.

Because Ji Ling's whole back was facing him, Sui Cannong couldn't see the expression on his face, but he felt that Ji Ling's body seemed to stiffen.

Sui Cannong sensed that something was wrong, and quickly said: "No, no, I was just joking, we are all adults, it doesn't matter if you have gifts or not, you have been tired enough these two days—"

Ji Ling turned around, shook his head, and said to Sui Cannong seriously: "There will be gifts."

But if there is a party on Friday night, it will conflict with Ji Ling's original plan.

However, Sui Cannong's birthday is actually on Saturday, and Ji Ling's plan is relatively flexible, so if it is postponed to Saturday night, Ji Ling feels that there should be no problem.

Thomas is a warm hearted person.

What he said was to make a big show for Sui Cannong, but there were too many people, and group socializing still couldn't go to places like bars and KTVs.

But Sui Cannong looked at the balloons and ribbons in the KTV box, and felt that Thomas must have put his heart into it.

Several other teachers also customized a pennant for Sui Cannong, with the words "worldbest biology teacher happy birthday" on it. This was the first time in Sui Cannong's life that he saw a mixed Chinese and English pennant.

All the teachers present here are young teachers, and they are more capable of going crazy. After a while, they grabbed the mic and sang happy birthday songs in various languages ​​to Sui Cannong.

Ji Ling, Louis, and Lin sat on the other side, and Sui Cannong came over with a few sliced ​​cakes and put them on their table.

Lin laughed and joked, "Ji, your groom is really responsible."

The teachers next to her also laughed. Since Halloween until now, they still like to tease Ji Ling kindly about dressing up as a ghost bride.

They were in the big box of KTV, Ji Ling sat at one table, Sui Cannong sat at the other table, their eyes occasionally met, and then Ji Ling saw Sui Cannong smiled at herself.

Ji Ling blinked.

Sui Cannong has long known the truth that alcohol can harm people, but he can prevaricate it during small gatherings, but today, as the birthday man, he really has no excuses to evade.

I can't stop drinking, the atmosphere is lively and others are booing, the amount of alcohol ingested in a short while is far beyond the controllable range, and even those who can drink are also confused.

Thomas drank less than Sui Cannong today, and he felt that Sui Cannong was not doing well, so he hiccupped and leaned into his ear and said, "Sui, let me call a car to take you home, take your home Give me the address..."

Sui Cannong's brain obviously couldn't move. Before he could speak, Thomas felt that the light in front of him was blocked by something.

Thomas raised his head in a daze, and then he saw Ji Ling standing in front of him.

"I'll take him back." He heard Ji Ling say, "I know where he lives."

Thomas responded bewilderedly.

Seeing the figures of the two leaving, Thomas scratched his head.

He felt that recently, Sui Cannong and Ji Ling seemed to have become very close friends, and they communicated a lot more. Obviously, a few months ago, they still seemed to be colleagues who had no intersection at all.

Thomas felt a little strange when he played a ghost on Halloween before. Later, he went to Sui Cannong's classroom to find someone during recess, and the students would all say that Sui Cannong went to Ji Ling's classroom.

But it turns out that they are already familiar...to the point where they even know their home address?

Ji Ling found that Sui Can was more drunk than he imagined.

At first he just walked crookedly, but luckily he didn't talk much, then he moved his face closer and recognized who was supporting him, Sui Cannong suddenly smiled softly.

Sui Cannong intermittently called out Ji Ling's name, and then Ji Ling heard him ask: "Is the cake... delicious?"

Ji Ling was taken aback for a moment, and said, "It's okay."

"Really, but I don't think you eat much..." Sui Cannong asked, "Do you want...do you want me to buy you another one?"

The cake Ji Ling really didn't move much, because his mouth is rather picky, and he realized after taking a bite that the cake should be made of vegetable cream, and Ji Ling felt that it was a bit greasy to eat.

What Ji Ling didn't expect was that Sui Cannong had been observing him.

Most of the weight of Sui Cannong's body was on Ji Ling's body, and his breath was very hot, and when it touched Ji Ling's ears, Ji Ling felt some itching at the base of his ears.

Ji Ling knew that what Sui Cannong said now should not be over his head, so he followed him and continued: "But today is your birthday, and the cake should be for you."

Sui Cannong seemed to laugh vaguely.

Ji Ling continued to support Sui Cannong with one hand, took out the key with the other hand, and opened the door with some difficulty.

"What's mine is yours, why make it so clear..." Sui Cannong moved closer and said, "Just tell me, if you want to eat it, I can buy it for you right now..."

The door opened, and Ji Ling could only continue to lead the person inside: "You are a little drunk now."

Ji Ling helped Sui Cannong to walk into the bedroom, but Sui Cannong's mouth did not stop for a moment: "Do you know...do you know that when you were drunk last time, we were not very close? Familiar, you didn't let go of the vase in someone's bar, but in the end it was me..."

Sui Cannong's words stopped abruptly because Ji Ling let go of his hand suddenly.

Sui Cannong was so drunk that he couldn't stand still, his body suddenly became unstable, and he fell directly on the bed.

Ji Ling stared at Sui Cannong who was paralyzed on the bed, thinking about whether to make some hangover soup.

In the end, he still planned to let Sui Cannong sleep first.

When Ji Ling was about to unfold the quilt to cover him, his arm was suddenly pulled by Sui Cannong, so he also fell on the mattress.

Sui Cannong turned over suddenly, and just pressed Ji Ling back on the bed.

Ji Ling saw that Sui Cannong was stunned for a while, then he smiled and asked slowly: "Since it's my birthday, what about my...my birthday present?"

Ji Ling's breathing became a little unsteady, and after a while he said, "It's ready, you go to bed first, and I'll give it to you tomorrow."

Sui Cannong muttered, and Ji Ling heard him say with some disappointment: "Oh, it's ready."

He said, "But I... I have other wishes."

Ji Ling was taken aback for a moment, and said, "If you want any more presents, I can buy them for you too."

Sui Cannong was quiet for a while, and then Ji Ling heard him say: "Can I stop checking in on that plan?"

Ji Ling was stunned for a moment: "...what?"

Sui Cannong didn't speak, he just looked at Ji Ling's face.

Sui Cannong's current posture gave Ji Ling an inexplicable sense of oppression.There was only one small light turned on in the bedroom, and the light was vague and dim, but Ji Ling noticed that Sui Cannong's eyes seemed a little red.

Before Ji Ling could see clearly, Sui Cannong's arms lost their strength, and he fell to Ji Ling's side, burying his face in Ji Ling's neck.

Ji Ling heard him call his name vaguely.

The drunken Sui Cannong seemed to be given a strange clingy buff, Ji Ling was a little at a loss, he could only raise his hand, and slowly stroked Sui Cannong's hair.

They were so close that Ji Ling could feel Sui Cannong's breathing became steady.

Just when Ji Ling thought that Sui Cannong was about to fall asleep, she heard Sui Cannong speak vaguely again: "Ji Ling, I actually know... I know that for you, living is not an easy task. things..."

Ji Ling froze for a moment: "What—"

"Everyone's past experience is different." Sui Cannong murmured to himself, "I know, for you, life... life may be difficult, but I still can't seem to help you... ..."

Ji Ling blinked blankly.

He heard Sui Cannong ask a little aggrieved: "But if... if you have any difficulties, why are you unwilling to tell me? Why... are you just unwilling to tell me?"

Ji Ling stared blankly at Sui Cannong's face.

They were all complete sentences, and they were in a language he could understand, but when they were put together, Ji Ling found that he couldn't understand what Sui Cannong was saying at all.

Sui Cannong's eyes were a little out of focus.

He looked far away, probably because of the alcohol, he didn't speak for a long time.

"Ji Ling," Ji Ling heard Sui Cannong's voice hoarse for a long while and said, "Why...why do you not want to live anymore?"

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