[Fairy Tail] Denisa

house! "

40.The army enlists animals to fight

So all the animals in the forest have to come for medical examination

The monkey at the top of the list doesn't want to join the army

he looks at his long tail

So he gritted his teeth and decided to break him

After entering...

The military doctor said: "The monkey's tail is broken, it is disabled, so it doesn't need to be a soldier..."

The second rabbit saw the monkey behave like this

And resolutely broke his long ears

After entering...

The military doctor said: "The rabbit's ears are broken, it's a disability, so I don't need to be a soldier..."

The third black bear thought to himself. .

"My ears are so short, what should I do if my tail is almost the same? 』

The kind-hearted rabbit and monkey came to help him find a way. .

Suddenly the monkey shouted: I know that if you break your teeth, you will be considered disabled!

So the monkey and the rabbit beat the black bear hard

Break all his teeth... .

Although the black bear is in pain, it is also very happy to go in for a medical examination

Not long after, I saw the black bear come out covering his mouth

cry and say...

Really x...They say I'm too fat to be a soldier

41.Once upon a time, a man was fishing and caught a squid.

The squid begged him: let me go, don't roast me to eat.

The man said: OK, then let me torture you with a few questions.

The squid said happily: Copy it, copy it!

Then the man grilled the squid. .

42.One day, Mr. Wang drove home.

Suddenly, a big Benz passed by, and when passing by him, the driver shouted at him:

"Dude, have you ever driven a big Benz?" After finishing speaking, "whoosh" flew away.

Mr. Wang was very angry, he stepped up the accelerator and chased after him.

Seeing that he was about to catch up, the driver stuck out his head and shouted at him again:

"Dude, have you ever driven a big Benz?" Then, the "whoosh" disappeared again.

"Damn, what the heck!" Mr. Wang felt better after scolding him, so he stopped chasing him.

opened for a while,

Mr. Wang saw that the big Benz just overturned on the side of the road, he was very curious, and slowly drove closer.

I saw the driver being pinned under the car and said weakly:

"Dude, have you ever driven a Daben? Do you know where its brakes are?"

43.I used to have schizophrenia, but now we are recovered~~~~~~~~

44.An international student was taking a driver's license test in the United States, and the road sign ahead suggested turning left. He was not sure, so he asked the examiner:

"Turn left?"

Answer: "right"

So... hung up. .

45.One day, Mung Dou committed suicide by jumping down from the 5th floor. She bled a lot and turned into red beans;

46.Xiao Ming had his hair cut, and when he came to school the next day, the students saw his new hairstyle and said with a smile: "Xiao Ming, your hair looks like a kite!"Xiao Ming felt wronged, so he ran outside and cried.Crying and crying~ He flew up......

47.There was a man who looked like an onion and cried as he walked...

48.One day the little penguin asked his grandma, "Grandma, am I a penguin?" "Yes, of course you are a penguin." The little penguin asked his father again, "Daddy, am I a penguin?" "Yeah, you are a penguin, what's the matter?" "But, why do I feel so cold?"

49.There's a pair of corn in love...

So they decided to get married...

wedding day...

One corn can't find the other...

The corn asked the popcorn next to him: Have you seen our corn?

Popcorn: My dear, is she wearing a wedding dress....

50.In the music class, the teacher played a piece of Beethoven

Xiao Ming asked Xiao Hua: "Do you know music?"

Xiao Hua: "Yes"

Xiao Ming: "Then do you know what the teacher is playing?"

Xiao Hua: "Piano."

51.Two people fell into the trap. The dead are called dead, but what are the living called?

A: Call for help!

52.One day there was a mother-in-law in a car...

In the middle of the ride, my mother-in-law didn't know the way...

The mother-in-law beat the driver's butt with a stick and said: Where is this?

Driver: This is my ass.... .

53.An egg went to a teahouse to drink tea, and it turned into a tea egg; an egg went to swim in the Songhua River, and it turned into a Songhua egg; an egg went to Shandong, and it turned into a Lu (stewed) egg; The egg lost its home, and it turned into a wild egg; an egg accidentally fell on the road and fell on the ground, and turned into a missile; an egg ran into someone's yard, and turned into an atomic bomb ;An egg ran to the Qinghai-Tibet Plateau and turned into a hydrogen bomb; an egg got sick and turned into a bad guy; an egg got married and turned into a jerk; *; an egg ran into the flowers and turned into Huadan; an egg was riding a horse and holding a knife, so it turned out to be Daomadan; It became a dinosaur egg; one egg was a male, and his wife committed adultery with other eggs outside, and he turned into a bastard; an egg...

54.The host asked: Can cats climb trees?The eagle quickly answered: Yes!Moderator: Give an example!The eagle was tearful: that year, I fell asleep, and the cat climbed the tree... Then there was an owl...

56.A dark night.... .

A group of female school students were playing Die Fairy in the dormitory, and suddenly

They couldn't stop screaming! ! !

The seniors upstairs hurried into their dormitory

Impressively, they saw the plates on their table spinning at an extremely fast speed

Astonishingly fast, astonishingly fast

"Oops! What did you do?"

The senior sister realized that the situation was wrong and hurriedly asked

"We..." said the girls

"We're just asking how fast can it go...?"

57.There is a man who looks like an airplane, and he flies as he walks

There is a person who looks like a piece of chocolate, and it is eaten as soon as he walks.

There is a person who looks like a light bulb, and it turns on when you walk

There was a man named Xiaohua who was picked as he was walking

There is a man named Coke, who was drunk while walking

58.A woman trembled when she met a robber and said, "I'm from XX. I just graduated and couldn't find a job. I really have no money..."

The robber burst into tears after hearing this, "Sister, I am also from XX, you take your student ID card, the robber in front is still from XX, don't worry, we will never rob our own people!"

XX of 58 can be freely replaced with the name of your own school or unit……….

59.A blind beggar is begging in the street wearing dark glasses.

A drunk man came over and felt sorry for him, so he threw a hundred yuan to him.

After walking for a while, the drunk man turned his head and saw the blind man facing the sun to distinguish the authenticity of the hundred-yuan copy.

The drunk came over and snatched back the money and said, "You fucking don't want to live anymore, how dare you lie to me!"

The blind beggar looked aggrieved and said, "Brother, I'm so sorry. I'm here to take a look on behalf of a friend. He is blind and went to the toilet. In fact, I am dumb."

"Oh, that's it," the drunk man threw down the money and walked away staggeringly...

60.Bird flu - it's all caused by "shit"! ! !

There are two kinds of people who have a great chance of getting bird flu—1. "Beasts"; 2. People who are "beasts"...

Because the cute anthropomorphic stealing Ying, Hong Ying, Jun/Jue Ying>∨⊙☆So I recommend everyone to watch the healing animation HTF~ Please don’t watch it with the company of adults~ What~

Mighty Erza (3)

"After cleaning up these people, we have to catch up quickly." Erza looked very domineering.

"This amount, two girls can handle it?" Lucy pointed at herself uncertainly.

"What can two women do!" Elegor's useless subordinates despised Lucy and Erza very much.

"Flies, watch me pull out your wings!" Another one who was not afraid of death stood up and made a disgusting strange sound.

"It's a sin to be too cute..." Lucy said narcissistically with shining stars around her.

Happy flew to Lucy's side, "Lucy, wake up."

"Despicable!" Erza activated the magic circle with one hand and summoned the magic sword, "The sword came out!" Lucy looked at the sword in Erza's hand in surprise.

"Magic Sword. Are you trying to insult Fairy Tail?! I don't guarantee that you will see tomorrow!" Erza said in a threatening tone.

"What's so rare." A large group of people rushed up, "We have a lot of magic swordsmen here." Most of the people raised their swords and slashed at Erza.Between swords and swords, the group of people was divided into several parts, some were flying, some were rolling, and the swords were instantly torn apart.Erza rushed to the crowd with her sword, and another group of people fell down one after another.

"Come and try this trick." Subordinates A, B, and C emitted white and yellow lights from their hands, concentrated them on Erza and launched them [Boom] When the floor shattered, Erza jumped out Summoned a magic circle in the air, and began to change weapons - the red tasseled spear.

"Turned into a gun!" Lucy's eyes showed fear.Erza, who was in the sky, swept a red-tasseled spear to the ground, "led" her subordinate A and flew out, then turned back, and after killing a large number of people, Erza switched to two swords again, Defeat the group of people surrounding her one by one.

"This time it's double swords!" A little cold sweat broke out on the head of the general who could turn to earth. "That woman's "changing" speed is amazing." The person who took the lead in provoking Erza gave Lucy a new question.

"Change clothes?"

"The magic sword is like Lucy's star spirit magic. It is the principle of calling out weapons stored in different spaces." There is a cloud floating in Habi's mind, constantly imagining and saying