living sacrifice

According to Genesis, God created the earth in six days and rested on the last day.This matter was even more unbelievable to me, because at the time I thought it was impossible for a human being to create a thing in one day, and then create the world in six days and rest, so I thought that God could not do it either.I feel that this world is so big, how could it be possible for God to spend only six days?

But now that I think about it, this idea itself is extremely stupid.If God were human, he would be bound by human beings, but the problem is that God is not human in the first place, God is God.Why can't God?I think God can’t do it because I didn’t know how powerful God is at that time, and I underestimated Him.

Some people say that this "six days" is an imaginary number, because God sees a thousand years as one day, so six days are actually 6000 years according to the current saying.But I think this is a very deceitful way of speaking.Because God told the Israelites not to work on the Sabbath, it was to commemorate God's creation.According to this statement, is it true that the Israelites will not be able to work for 1000 years?I don't think the Bible is using a metaphor here, it says "day" is a day.God created the world in just six days.

I don’t want to play tricks on the language. I think God’s wisdom is superb. He cares about us mortals, and he has used the simplest words to reveal His superb truth, but we can’t understand it because we don’t believe it.

If a person chooses not to believe, then even if 1 evidences are placed in front of his eyes, he can still turn a blind eye.

I discovered this early on, because I found that if I choose to be gay, I can find 1 reasons to say that homosexuality is reasonable; if I am against homosexuality, I can also find 1 reasons.I am often led by my reason and do things that I regret. After Wang Xuanhuan's incident, I no longer believe in my reason.

Either I literally believe every word God says, or I don't believe in God at all.I think that if there is a false word in this "Bible", it is false, and it is not worthy of my further study, because I believe that God cannot deceive people.If he deceives me about one word, how do I know he won't deceive me about others?

What I want to establish with God is a relationship of pure love and mutual trust. I don't want a "God" like Wang Xuanhuan to control me in everything. Such a "God" is not love, but PUA.The premise of love and trust is that this God must be trustworthy and worthy of love. He is as holy as He reveals, dislikes injustice, justice, and love... He is perfect, let me Love him sincerely, sincerely, and voluntarily, and I can really feel that he really loves me, not someone else's order.

But the Bible is so difficult. I was stuck in "Genesis", and I started to watch "Apocalypse" out of agitation, but I didn't expect that "Apocalypse" also stuck me.

I couldn't understand "Apocalypse" from the beginning, it said this church, that church; it also said that a woman gave birth to a baby and was hunted down by a dragon, and then the baby was born, and God protected him; A monster, there is another monster, all have several heads and feet, have a blasphemous name, there is a monster in the sky, and was later thrown down by God; it is said that seven angels blow seven trumpets, and all kinds of disasters on the earth, During the catastrophe, people blasphemed God and did not seek His name; after the catastrophe, the kingdom of God came, and Jesus Christ came back to the world again. People all over the world saw Him, and there must be people weeping and gnashing their teeth at that time; It is said that the world was burned by fire, but the people chosen by God were resurrected in the new heaven and new earth in white clothes, and never cried or mourned again...

The New Jerusalem is so beautiful, and I also look forward to such a place, but it is so perfect that it looks a little fake, and it is hard for me to believe it.

To be honest, I actually understood the literal meaning of the visions in the Book of Revelation, but I couldn’t understand a single word of the visions it expressed.

However, I understood the huge warning in the Book of Revelation: If people do not believe in God, they will regard God as false, thinking that they are the truth, and they will also regard God’s warning as false.Then when the end times really come and Jesus really comes back, there will be no chance to repent.

So I had doubts about the credibility of the prophecies in the Bible, and I studied the prophecies in the Bible by the way.A person who specializes in the study of Bible prophecy believes that about 800% of the more than 95 prophecies in the Bible have been fulfilled, and only 5% are less than unfulfilled (about 20 prophecies). Wait until these are fulfilled , the end of the world is coming.

I have written a lot of stories about the end of the world, but it was just to make money and popularity, so that fans can come to see me and pay attention to me.I swear I never take the stories I write seriously.But this volume of "Revelation" completely changed my thinking. It told me: God said that the world will perish, and time is running out. I must repent, or I will go to hell.

What is hell like? The Bible says that the fire there is never quenched and the worm never dies.

What is hell like?When I committed a crime, in my confused consciousness, I seemed to have really been to that place. At the time when I seemed to be suffering from depression, I really felt the feeling of hell, where I couldn’t laugh, and I couldn’t laugh anymore. No joy, like the dementors in Harry Potter, sucking people dry.Where I grieved every day for the sins I had committed, I regretted the things I did so that the wrath of God would fall on me, where I lost all hope of tomorrow, where I thought of ending my life , but still stubbornly alive.

I studied it very carefully, because I had experienced it, and only divine revelation could clearly explain everything that happened to me before.

I was shocked by the whole world, because it deceived me, it made me believe that people will not be judged after death, so I dared to do whatever I want because of .If there really is a God, I would never dare to be gay under the eyes of God. It is not worthwhile to offend God for the sake of sex.

Maurice Rawlings wrote a book called "Beyond Death's Door", which records the testimonies of those who have heard or experienced in the hospital from those who came back to life after dying.One of them, when the doctor rescued him, suddenly had shortness of breath, rapid heartbeat, dilated pupils, and shouted: "Help me!" The doctor was also shocked by him, and after rescue he really came back to life up.This person claimed to have gone to hell, and what he did after he was saved was to believe in Jesus and become a Christian.

I can't accept these things at all, but I seem to really feel hell. In my most desperate time, I really feel that I am at the entrance of hell.I once cried and prayed to God: "Wang Xuanhuan is going to hell, let him go down by himself, don't drag me. God, please save me!"

But then, I forgot about it.I also couldn’t remember why I suddenly prayed like this at that time, after all, I didn’t believe in God at that time.The only reasonable explanation is that, in fact, I really know that there is a God, but I have been sinning against Him and deceiving myself.

This state has lasted for a long time. I have checked "Genesis" and "Apocalypse", but I still haven't got the answer I want.I felt very hopeless. As expected, it was impossible to know whether this world was created by God with my own strength. I couldn’t even read the Bible.I need other help, but I don't know where I can get the help I need.

People on the Internet have their own opinions, and sometimes they can argue about these things without saying anything.The problem is, I don't know which side I should be on.The more I search for information on the Internet, the more irritable I become.

What I want is the truth of a world, an easy answer, but what I've found are two armies that seem to be at war.

You Yan was also very anxious for me: "Lin Xiao, don't always be alone. You should be with your brothers and sisters. The information on the Internet is very messy."

To be honest, I feel that I am really busy. I want to understand the creation and end of this world. How can I have time to attend your gatherings!

But You Yan is very persuasive, and I don't want to go around with her anymore.Seven grinding eight grinding, half an hour has passed.I looked at the watch very anxiously, seeing that she didn't know how to back down at all.

I could only use my trump card: "Then I'll try it out. If it doesn't work, don't bother me to join any Bible study group in the future."

"Of course. But I think you will like it." You Yan was full of confidence.

I wanted to complain in my heart, but when I thought about what happened last time I went to church, I didn't dare to make such a promise anymore.

Yes, I am really hopeful during this Bible study. I hope that God can change my personality and make me like such social activities. Maybe I will really hear God say something to me during the Bible study. what?Maybe God had some other idea to reveal himself to me so that I would no longer have doubts about his real existence.So that I can end this long process of investigating "whether God exists or not" and continue to move forward.

People with social disabilities hate parties, including online ones.I feel like my face is stiff when I turn on the video; I don’t know what to say when I don’t turn on the video and look at the dark screen.

I wish there were so many people attending the Bible study that I could blatantly turn off the mic.But when I opened the online conference room, I found that there were only four people in it including You Yan and me.

The other one is Dong Yiyi, I know her, and I have a good impression of her; but the other one is a stranger, whose name I don't know.

You Yan introduced to me in the voice: "The one with the yellow profile picture is Sister Zhao. She didn't come to your meeting last time, and you haven't seen her. Sister Zhao is still out of town, and she will return to church in about two weeks. .Is that right, Ms. Zhao?"

The voice that replied in the voice sounded hoarse and old-fashioned.The person named Zhao said: "Yes, I still have two weeks. Hello, Lin Xiao, nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you." I was embarrassed facing strangers.

"Okay, let's start then." Sister Zhao said in a hoarse voice.

They started, and I tried to divert my attention from socializing with strangers to the Bible study itself, but my heart was full of irritability.

The bible study I hope in my heart can solve all the doubts in my heart, and light can shine into my heart, just like when I heard the sermon for the first time in church, but what they study are all trivial things, about a The opinion of two words does not interest me in the slightest.

After half an hour, I started to wander. I looked at a pile of materials about "Genesis" that was open next to the computer, and I was very entangled in my heart. When will this useless Bible study end?

Sister Zhao suddenly called her name and said, "Let's share what is 'love your neighbor as yourself' and what is meant by 'love your neighbor as yourself' in your mind. Lin Xiao, you should also participate, don't say nothing."

I am disgusted by being called, as if I were called in class.Moreover, I haven't even read the "Bible", so asking someone like me who doesn't understand anything to share, what good will it do for everyone?

This was what I felt at the time. I felt that a person who doesn’t understand anything had better shut up and listen to others. Those who understand should try their best to tell what the Bible actually says, and it’s not about analyzing his personal views.Don't want everyone to be able to talk, and you don't know who to listen to when you are in a mess.

Dong Yiyi said softly: "Then let me talk about it first. To love others as yourself, I think you must love yourself first. If you don't love yourself, how can you love others?"

When I heard this, I went "thud", because my ex's online name was "How can you love others if you don't love yourself". Hearing this made me angry, because I hate that ex who is always irresponsible.But I thought I couldn't treat the Bible study with colored glasses. After listening to Dong Yiyi's answer, I didn't say a word.

You Yan rushed to say: "I think it's very simple to love others as yourself, that is, to love others as you love yourself."

"Lin Xiao, what do you think?" Sister Zhao asked me suddenly.

My heart was empty and I didn't know what to say.I'm afraid that the answer I give will be a joke, and I don't have any answers that seem profound.So I honestly said: "I think the same as You Yan."

After hearing this, Sister Zhao said "hmm".She seemed to be tricked, and after a pause, she said: "It's really interesting. You see, the four of us have three opinions. Let me share with you what I think about loving your neighbor as yourself. I think loving your neighbor as yourself is Love people with the love of God."

I think that since it is a Bible study, I should find out what I didn't understand before. I also expect them to explain to me such complicated and profound issues in "Genesis" and "Revelation".In the end, I didn't expect that it was only the four words "love your neighbor as yourself" that I had no doubts about, but I found out three meanings?So which meaning is correct?

According to an author's intuition, the expression at this time should not have many meanings. If such a simple word can understand all kinds of meanings, it is likely to be like the article taught by a middle school teacher to Lu Xun—— — is not what the author intends to express.

Who can I discuss in depth, such as You Yan, isn't she very good at persuading people?Maybe we can separate the false from the true in the debate, and understand the true meaning of "love your neighbor as yourself" in the Bible.Or Sister Zhao can explain what is "God's love" and what is "human love", what is the difference between God's love and human's love, how does a human being use God's love to love others, and how does it work?

But they didn't say anything, and the topic just passed away, and I didn't dare to ask any more, because I thought everyone had no problem, and it seemed stupid for me to ask, and I didn't know their rules and taboos.

But since then I have lost interest in Bible study groups.

The word “from then on” means that until two years later, I still refused to study the Bible. I did not obey until I realized that it was God’s guidance that told me to go to a new church to study the Bible.