living sacrifice

The most difficult thing at the beginning is to understand God's will.

Just like walking a maze, the fastest way is to start from the end and go back to the beginning.So now I believe in the Lord, so the end point is very, very clear——

The world will perish, and I should stop looking at the world.Although I may have sufferings in this world, I must endure to the end so that I can catch up with the last ark. This ark is not the ark where Noah was saved from the flood, but the ark where the Lord Jesus Christ saved the world from the burning fire that destroyed the world.

When I think about it this way, I actually understand that the world visible to the eyes is imaginary, and the world invisible to the eyes is reality. I have to live upside down with this world.

Moreover, even those who are truly saved have the difference between being rewarded and being merely saved. Although I was not very clear at the time, I knew that some people would be rewarded in the kingdom of heaven.My life on earth is too painful, and I don't want to live like this again in eternity.

The thing about renting a house has been running around for a month.

I found a house in the city center, 10 minutes away from the unit. It is a single family with a toilet. It is a little small, but I am very satisfied.

My mother is also particular about the geographical location, and she requires it to be either near my work or near my home.I can't rent near my home, otherwise they run very hard and I will be exposed, so I can only rent in the city center. City S, what land price do you think about!

In the meantime, I experienced some unpleasantness and was frightened by the intermediary. I ran several ATM machines that night and paid half a year's rent in full.Depositing one to pay six is ​​the discount condition given to me by the agent. In fact, most houses in S City are one to pay three.If it is the latter, my money loss may be smaller, but the Lord did not let me do this. I think he has his foresight. I didn’t understand this until I checked out the house a year later. Strange.

At that time, of course, there was a great loss in money, and I didn’t understand God’s leading for a long time, but at that time I was very obedient and joyful.

I don't have much stuff, but moving is always a hassle.In fact, after so long, Wang Xuanhuan has hardly appeared in the community. The neighbors will definitely gossip.

There are old neighbors nearby, and everyone has a good relationship. I don't want to disturb these "public opinions", so I decided to move at night.

The newly rented house, although the price is cheap, is completely messed up inside.I had new windows and locks put in for me, and I still had to clean a lot of the inside.

When I was squatting there to clean the toilet, tears flowed down my face.Facing the toilet that has been used by countless people and the "thousand-year scale" inside, I suppressed my nausea and put on layers of gloves on my hands, but sometimes I could still feel the coldness of the water .

The oil in the kitchen is difficult to clean even with strong decontamination. The two funnels of the range hood are already full, and it feels like you can shake out the oil if you touch it casually.I wanted to invite someone to do repairs at home, but considering that I lived here as a woman, I was afraid of any danger, so I didn't dare to invite someone.

I personally cleaned the yellowed walls piece by piece, brick by brick.

For the peeling walls and corners, I found those cheap 3D stickers on the Internet, and arranged them beautifully. I also bought a plastic green leaf in the corner, and put a fake bird’s nest and birds in it. The fallen wall skin barely covered it.

The floor can't be cleaned no matter what, so it can only be washed over and over again, and finally it can barely be seen.

The furniture boards were all askew, as if they would fall off if touched, but I don't know how to carpentry, so I just let it go.

I have never done these things before, and everything is a challenge for me, including entering a new home itself, which also brings me some panic.

Because of fear, when I was cleaning the house alone, I couldn't help but pray for the cleansing of this new home according to the prayer You Yan said: "Lord, I don't know how many people have lived here, what happened What, but please cover the doorframes and lintels with your precious blood, cleanse the place where I live, and keep the dirty things away from here. Thank you Lord.”

The new room has a row of ceiling closets sealed by the corner molding, and the door cannot be opened.I was terrified of that corner and never knew what was in that row of cupboards hanging over the top of my bed.Until the final move away, this mystery has not been solved.

I didn't dare to move in broad daylight, because I didn't have a man to help, and I was afraid that the neighbors would gossip, so I could only call a moving company's car in the middle of the night, and let them pack and move quietly... I was busy for several weeks.

In fact, the house is not even tidy, but I really tried my best.

When I slept here for the first night, I was so exhausted that I didn't even take off my clothes, I just lay down on the bed and fell asleep.There may be bugs in my bed and I feel itchy on my back when I sleep.

In City S, for 3000 yuan, you want to rent a room in the city center that does not share the kitchen and toilet with others. How much better treatment do you want?

On the day my parents came back from other places, I said that Wang Xuanhuan was on a business trip, and I planned to evade it.

They are really easy to fool, because they never suspect that I lied to them.But they always come to my rental house anyway.

When my mother walked into the room, she couldn't stop talking, and her head didn't stop shaking: "This is the house that Wang Xuanhuan is renting? It's too bad! Only 3000 yuan to live in Such a house? I rent it now, so there is nothing I can do. You young people really don’t make me worry, you don’t know anything, what can you expect from you in the future?”

My mother's words pierced my heart like a knife, but I didn't make a sound.

My mother and my father have been busy from the first day in my house. My father is busy making window frames and repairing various equipment. My mother cleans the house again. live.

While cleaning, she chattered: "Is Wang Xuanhuan so busy with work? Why did you marry someone like him? You are a foreigner, you have to go on a business trip, and you didn't get anything when you got married. Going on a business trip. He's not home all day, is it interesting for you to live like this?"

"Okay, don't be bothered, get me a hammer." My dad couldn't stand it anymore.

Every time I hear my mother say something like this, I want to cry.I feel so stupid.

When I made this decision at the time, I thought I was quite rational. It was a decision I made after weighing the pros and cons of all parties. I thought it would reassure my parents that they would no longer urge the marriage, and it would also allow me to be free.But now, my parents are not only not relieved, but I have been implicated by me to come here to work, and she really has no way of knowing the concessions I made to my mother. How can she understand that I was forced to marry by her and ended up looking for a human form? What about marriage?

"Okay, okay, it's almost done." I said.

My mother said: "How about it? Your place looks like a bird's nest, can people live in it? In such a large place, the bird's nest in the corner still looks a bit beautiful."

I said proudly, "Isn't it pretty?"

My dad satirized me again: "What looks good, it's full of mosquitoes in summer."

I feel that nothing I have done can satisfy my parents. The whole aura is a Shura field, just like when they urged me to marry, just like when they chose a school for me. It's like they forced me to go to cram school when I was a child... It's not that I don't know that they treat me well, but the problem is that I really don't want it anymore.

After my parents left, my room was finally quiet.

I don't know whether I should enjoy this quietness or muster the courage to face the rest of my life.In the end I decided to take a shower first.

Even if my dad repaired it, he couldn't solve the problems of uneven cooling and heating of the water pipes and backwater in the sewer. My mother made the walls I painted whiter. I am already very grateful.

I cried in the shower, I have never wronged myself like this, I don't know what all this is for.

The number of times I prayed to God gradually increased, and the number of words also increased. From the first good morning in the morning and good night in the evening, now I can say whatever I want.

"You can say anything" is a brother's advice on prayer, and I think it is very good.

I have no one to talk to here anyway, when I'm scared, when I'm lonely, I talk to an invisible God, and the odd thing is, I think God actually responds to me.

Every time I say this, my friends and colleagues either think that I am an imaginary god, or I hope that there is a god, or they think it is a coincidence...Anyway, they always don’t follow I mean what I express to understand, but to distort it according to their meaning.I'm used to this too.

But I still want to say that the existence of God does not depend on my will or your will, even if the most powerful person in the world refute it, it is useless.If God is imagined by man, then he is not the real God, but an idol.

The name "Jehovah" means "I am who I am", and the English translation is "IamwhoIam".No need to explain, you know who he is in your heart.

Thank you Lord for hearing my prayers and helping me slowly build up my faith.

However, Satan is not happy to see Christians having joy after being saved by grace. He always tries to put us to death.

At first, I was not familiar with the leader of the kingdom of darkness, and I put Satan's ability into the category of "intimidation".Even Mu Yun said: "Satan can only do this? Do you think Satan is too weak?"

Yes, I have no idea how cunning and powerful the enemy I am facing is.What I call "brave" is nothing more than the absolute courage of a newborn calf who is not afraid of tigers.

One day, You Yan brought a family into our church.

You Yan said: "This is my son's friend. Come on, dear girl, tell everyone yourself what your name is."

You Yan stroked the man's bald head.Because the child is very tall, she had to do this while the child was sitting down.

"Say, tell everyone, what's your name, tell me quickly!" The child's mother has been urging him in a very anxious tone, and while urging, her eyes are red and she touches the child's hand.

The child didn't say a word, just looked at us and giggled.No matter how his mother urged him, he didn't speak, just kept laughing.

His father couldn't help crying, and he wiped it with the palm of his hand.With quick eyes and quick hands, You Yan handed him a tissue.

"Jiang Zhixing." The child suddenly said in a low voice.

"Okay! Zhixing is so obedient and obedient." His mother cheerfully introduced to others, "Jiang Zhixing, the Jiang of sex, with ambition and action."

"My son was not like this." His father suddenly choked up and spoke.

Qian Junru took Jiang Zhixing and his family into the small room and talked a lot to his parents.

And You Yan told me: "Jiang Zhixing used to have good grades and was a top student. Later, he became obsessed with online games and became like this. When I went to school with my son, I happened to meet his mother, and his mother said to take him. He went to the school to get rid of Internet addiction, and took him to moxibustion. He tried various methods, and he was covered with injuries. God saw how pitiful they were, so he asked me to bring them here.”

How could a top student suddenly become a fool?Could it be that the school for getting rid of Internet addiction gave him some kind of medicine?

You Yan said: "It's so pitiful. His mother rushed to the doctor in a hurry, and gave him all kinds of medicine. Now that he is in this state, his mother must repent. They only come for half a day today, and I will pray for them next week." , hope they can keep coming here. Only God can make them healed."

At this time, I heard Sister Zhao and the others discussing.

Sister Zhao: "This child must be possessed by a demon. Let's pray for him to be cleansed later."

Jiang Yiyi: "Oh, what if I'm afraid? I'm afraid. Why don't you pray first, and I'll leave first."

Sister Zhao: "What are you afraid of? You belong to God, so you are not afraid! Lin Xiao, do you want to come and listen too? You want to participate together."

Now that my name was mentioned, I stopped pretending to listen secretly. I walked over and asked, "Does demon possession mean that there are ghosts in his body? What is cleansing prayer?"

Sister Zhao: "Be quiet, don't be heard by his parents, and don't let them be frightened. People of God have the authority to cast out demons. You don't have to be afraid. The demons in him are afraid of us. We are in the name of the Lord. Just cast out the ghosts. Lin Xiao, this kind of opportunity is rare, you will watch from the side for a while, if you are moved in your heart, you can pray with us."

I'm also very interested in things like exorcising ghosts. I don't know how to cast them out. Is it true that ghosts will come out.If a ghost really came out, where would it be put?What does a ghost look like?

I looked at Sister Zhao carefully, and I felt that her dark face instantly made me feel holy.Despite her ugly appearance, she can still see that there are ghosts in others.

Of course, we can all see that Jiang Zhixing is abnormal, but I can't see that there is a ghost in him.I wonder what sister Zhao saw?Could it be that her eyes are like infrared rays, which can see through the inside of a person?Maybe she really can, that's why she said it so firmly.

When Jiang Zhixing's family came out accompanied by Qian Junru, the formation was already set up outside.

They asked the child to sit on a chair in the middle of the room, surrounded by a circle of people.

I didn't know what to do, so I could only secretly observe others with my eyes open.

Each of them stretched out a hand, with the palms facing the child, some were placed on him, and some were in the air.I saw that although Jiang Yiyi was scared, she yelled the loudest, "Ha~lelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah..."

"Lord, please have mercy on this child, oh, I really know that you love him, you really love him..."

"Lord, in your name, I cast out the evil spirit from Jiang Zhixing, please tell the evil spirit to leave, and stay far away from Jiang Zhixing..."

"Lord, you are merciful, gracious and loving, and you are going to bless their whole family through this child. If it weren't for this child, their whole family would not have come to your house. We really know you to give them grace..."

The screams one after another made me dizzy.I also observed Jiang Zhixing, he changed from dull at the beginning to a bit ferocious, his expression was serious, and he kept staring at Jiang Yiyi.Jiang Yiyi seemed more nervous and shouted harder.

The child's mother comforted him softly at the side: "Jiang Zhixing, don't stare at others all the time, it's very impolite. These aunts love you very much, and they pray for you so that your illness will be cured quickly."

The child laughed, then he turned his head and stared ferociously at me who was standing not far away.

I got a little creepy and pretended to look at the clock on the wall.Time passed by, and I was looking forward to a black thing coming out of Jiang Zhixing's body, but I didn't see any at all.

Sister Zhao said to Jiang Zhixing's mother: "This one time is definitely not enough. You have to come to church all the time, preferably every Sunday. Among us, we can also go to your house and pray for your family's cleansing."

"Thank you, thank you so much."

"Thank you Jesus Christ."

"Thank you Jesus."

This was the first time I experienced exorcism, and to be honest I didn't find anything cast out, which was a bit disappointing.

Speaking of exorcising demons, Jiang Yiyi told me: "Have I told you about the churches I went to?"

"I haven't talked about it in detail."

"Lin Xiao, in fact, I was really scared just now, especially when the kid was staring at me, I could only close my eyes and not look at him. I was in another church before, and I couldn't sleep at that time, Later, the elder told me that I was possessed by a ghost, which scared me half to death. He also said that I was a dog spirit! Where did the Bible mention a dog spirit? Later, when I was frightened by him, I gave him a 500 yuan note Ka, tell him to cast out demons for me."

"Is that a lie to you?" I said.

She nodded: "Lin Xiao, I didn't understand at that time. I have suffered too much in various churches. Only here, sister Zhao treats me well."

"Sister Zhao is very kind to everyone."

"Yeah, so now I can sleep too. I really thank the Lord Jesus. Actually, to be honest, what I really thought in my heart at that time was that if I really got healed, I could leave the church. So The Lord Jesus was right in not calling me healed. I am so thankful now."

I don't quite understand what Jiang Yiyi said. I remember she said that she has been to at least two churches. One is the church that said she was possessed by demons. What I don't understand is how she believes such nonsense; The second is the church that often calls her to confess and repent. What I can't understand is how she likes a place that often calls her to confess and repent.

At that time, I felt that my church was the best in the world and did not ask people to confess their sins and repent. Everyone was like a family and loved each other. How wonderful!

This time I had experience. When I posted the exorcism on the Internet, as I expected, the Christian who opposed me came again.He left me a message: "I really advise you to take a good look at what the brothers have written about the Charismatics. Hey, it's all the mercy of the Lord. I really think you won't understand if I say it."

Yes, I really don't understand.I don't understand why he is so entangled in the affairs of the Charismatics. Where did the Charismatics offend him?I don't want to understand, and I don't want to reply.I trust the Lord, and I think that if I am really wrong, the Lord will make me understand.

I like Jiang Zhixing’s family very much, firstly because he was the first person I saw who was possessed by a demon, and I sincerely hope that his illness can be cured through our prayers; secondly, his father is an academician of the Chinese Academy of Sciences, and I It was the first time I had contact with such a person.

Jiang Zhixing's father left a very deep impression on me.His head looks like Detective Conan, with a lock of hair always up in front.

Jiang Zhixing's father liked to argue with Sister Zhao very much.Once when we were talking about the topic "Has anyone seen the Father in Heaven", Jiang Zhixing's father suddenly jumped up from the back row, blushing and said: "You are wrong to say that! I have also been to church abroad. , They told me that, according to the Bible, no one has ever met the Holy Father face to face!"

Seeing his distraught look, we were all laughing.In fact, we didn't have any malicious intentions, we just thought he was so serious about this issue, and his appearance was very funny and cute.Moreover, he is not a Christian, so why get excited?I understand that he is a very serious person.

But the more we laughed, the angrier he got and the more he stammered.

Sister Zhao comforted him and said, "We all know what you want to express, but you can see that the Bible actually said that Moses met God with his face open, and when he came down from the mountain, he still had Jehovah on his face." the light, which terrified the people of Israel at the foot of the mountain. Later Moses had to cover his face to face the people again.”

Jiang Zhixing's father said: "No! Your statement is definitely wrong! The pastor abroad is very qualified, and Feng Bingcheng, the author of "Wandering Ziyin", also met there at that time. Don't underestimate me! Although I don't believe it, but I and Feng Bingcheng and they have had many face-to-face exchanges, and I know all of this. Jesus said that no one has seen the Father except him. You can’t talk nonsense like that if it’s not in the Bible!”

What a lovely scientist!

Sister Zhao explained to him repeatedly that in fact, our attention has long been out of the question itself.But Jiang Zhixing's father didn't accept it. In the end, he sat in the last row with his face upturned and didn't talk to anyone.

It may be because of this incident that he was no longer interested in church affairs.I am not praising his spirit, because in the process of reading the Bible, you will definitely encounter countless discussions like this, you must be very patient, willing to listen to others, and then have humility, and make good use of other scriptures The key to research is to ask God for direction.Sometimes, you may not have an answer to a problem after a year or two, but if God is willing to tell you, the problem may be solved right away.

However, maybe that's how Jiang Zhixing's father was protected. He didn't listen to words that had no basis in the Bible, and he didn't get into other people's boats just because they treated him well.What he seeks is the truth, and in order to seek the truth, he can even offend those who might help his son, because he has a heart for truth.May the Lord open his eyes!

And, thanks to such a lovely scientist, I finally have my own interpretation of what Genesis says at the beginning, "all the waters under heaven are gathered together in one place".Of course, I am not the truth, just a reasonable guess.

In order to ease Jiang Zhixing's father's emotions, Sister Zhao asked him to give us a popular science lecture. He was very active at that time and even made a special PPT.

In the lecture, he said: "I really hope that you can not only read the Bible, but also understand science. You can see how amazing our earth is. This picture is from the Arctic Circle. The ocean current here is This way..."

This is the first time for me to look at the earth from such an angle, because I usually look at it from the perspective of a globe, not from the perspective of the Arctic Circle and Antarctic Circle.On the globe, these ends are blocked by plastic bars.

"It's quite miraculous when you think about it. According to you Christians, the earth created by God is miraculous. If the earth didn't have this inclination angle, there would be no spring, summer, autumn and winter, and no change of seasons."

"In the past, the earth we lived on was a whole piece of land. Later, due to the drift of the earth's crust, the seven oceans gradually formed."

When he talked about this, I suddenly had a guess: "Genesis" said that "the waters of the world were gathered in one place", so the land of the world was also gathered in one place. Later, at the Tower of Babel, God scattered people. Here and there, did all the land drift along with it, some forming peninsulas, some forming islands, and finally becoming what we see today?

I can't say this is a biblical interpretation, it's just a guess.But I think with such a conjecture, there is an explanation for "all the water in the world gathers in one place".

Of course, a lot of the knowledge I learned was returned to the teacher long ago, and there were too many things to study later, so I didn’t waste any more time on it. "Wandering Zi Yin".The pastor, a former paleontologist, had a much more scientific interpretation than mine.One of the chapters is dedicated to the Bible and science, and they are all topics like this. If you are interested, you can read it.

I think this is the end of Jiang Zhixing's father.He seldom came to this church later, but his son and his wife stayed here, especially his wife was baptized here.