Sir, I'm not good

"Mr. Gu, hey, can you still work in the hospital? It looks like you're recovering well."

"Shen Yao?"

Shen Yao said hello, walked over, stopped at the end of the bed, looked at the leg that was cast, and knocked curiously, "Does it hurt?"

"It's broken, it's not paralyzed, why doesn't it hurt?"

Gu Yinian put down the work report in his hand and rubbed the space between his brows.

Shen Yao seemed to be in a good mood, wandering around the ward, as if entering for the first time.

"Dr. Shen was sent by the Third Hospital to investigate the hospitalization conditions of the Second Hospital?"

"No, I just want to see your living conditions. You are living a good life."

Saying that, Shen Yao stood by the window sill, and there was a vase on the window sill, with a few fresh flowers inserted in it, including a branch of rose, deep red, Shen Yao touched it, and the petals were as soft as silk.

Taking out the rose, Shen Yao turned around and asked, "Who gave it to you?"

Gu Yinian looked at the rose, was silent for a moment, then shook his head: "No one, the flowers ordered at the flower shop are different every day."

Shen Yao looked very leisurely, walking around the room with a dripping rose.

Gu Yinian knew that she didn't come to visit him, she wasn't his doctor, and the two of them didn't have much friendship, so they must have something to talk about when they came here this time.

And this matter can only be related to Shu Xian.

"What do you want to say?"

Gu Yinian knew that Shen Yao was waiting for him to speak, perhaps in Shen Yao's view, the one who speaks first would lose the momentum, and the one who pretended to have the upper hand would gain the upper hand, but he had no intention of dealing with Shen Yao, he just wanted to know what Shen Yao was going to say .

He is both afraid and longing for things related to Shu Xian.

Shen Yao smiled, walked to Gu Yinian's bedside, and handed him a rose in her hand.

Gu Yinian just watched quietly, without reaching out to pick it up, and Shen Yao didn't feel embarrassed, so he inserted the rose into the water glass on the bedside table with his backhand.

Gu Yinian looked at his water glass, his face turned dark.

Shen Yao sat down, resting her chin, looking at the rose, "I want to send flowers to someone I like, what's the point of ordering them myself?"

"...how is he?"

Hearing Gu Yinian couldn't help asking, Shen Yao smiled as gently as ever, "Don't you just want to let him go? Why don't you go to him."

"He doesn't want to see me."

Shen Yao raised her eyebrows, actually Shu Xian might not want to see Gu Yinian, she even felt that Shu Xian must miss Gu Yinian very much.

But one code is one code, whether you want to meet, and whether you will be happy when you meet, there is no necessary connection.

After deliberating for a moment, Shen Yao spoke first: "I'm definitely on Shu Xian's side, you know that?" This is the prerequisite for her to take any action.

Gu Yinian nodded, of course he knew that Shen Yao was from the Bai family, and Bai Jianguo regarded Shu Xian as his second grandson, so Shen Yao's position must be Shu Xian.

Seeing Gu Yinian nodded, Shen Yao continued: "So I came to you not for your happiness, but for Shu Xian's happiness."

"What happened to him?"

Gu Yinian asked eagerly, calm and steady one second, panicked the next.

Seeing this, Shen Yao smiled brightly, she knew that Gu Yinian, who is as sensitive as he is, can see through a little bit!

"It's fine for the time being. He went to visit Bai Yu's grave with the old man yesterday at Qingming. After sweeping the grave, he went home and had a meal. He went back to school this morning..."

"Speak straight."

Shen Yao was interrupted by Gu Yinian, she waved her hand and said helplessly: "How can we achieve the effect of the program by talking straight? We still have to do it step by step. Why don't we talk about it first, why I only came to you now."

Gu Yinian was a little annoyed by Shen Yao's self-talk. Seeing this, Shen Yao obviously wanted to guide his emotions, "Shouldn't this question be asked to you?"

Shen Yao didn't look sideways, although she was still smiling, but her voice was inexplicably majestic: "Answer my question and follow my rhythm, ok?"

Seeing this, Gu Yinian couldn't help but rubbed his forehead, wanted to take a sip of water slowly, then turned around and saw a rose stuck in his water glass.

It must be because something happened to Shu Xian that Shen Yao came to him, but he has no way to know Shu Xian's situation directly, so he can only follow Shen Yao now.

Staring at Shen Yao's smile and thinking for a moment, Gu Yinian said in a deep voice: "At first you thought that our separation would have little effect on Shu Xian's condition, but now you regret it?"

Shen Yao blinked, and secretly sighed Gu Yinian's sensitivity in her heart.

"Well, I still think it's better for you to be his emotional sustenance." Shen Yao said sincerely.

Gu Yinian smiled wryly, he really wanted to, but he did too much, which made Shu Xian feel too much pressure, and the car accident made Shu Xian recall Bai Yu's ending, so he refused him decisively .

He knew that Shu Xian was doing it for his own good, because he didn't love him, so he didn't want to occupy his emotional sacrifice.

"I want to stand behind him, but he has to allow it."

Shen Yao nodded, frowned and thought for a moment, then shook her head, "You can't say that, you can be tougher, if it's Bai Yu, you definitely won't listen to Shu Xian."

"But I'm not."

"Yes, you are not, you are Gu Yinian, your love is another kind of madness that is completely opposite to Bai Yu, your love is too selfless, so selfless that you completely hide your own possessiveness."

It doesn't matter if you don't love me, as long as you are good to me, it doesn't matter to me, whether you believe these words or not, of course it has something to do with it.

The essence of love is selfish, but some people choose a selfless expression.

As a result, both possessive and controlling desires were covered up, manifested in actions, that is, pushing Shu Xian to Xu Zhi and agreeing to separate.

Shen Yao wanted to sigh, but held back, turned her head, and glanced at the roses in the cup, "Perhaps, you can also love a little more selfishly."

She doesn't know if her suggestion is right or not, but Gu Yinian is too passive now, Shu Xian can do whatever he wants, and selfishness often means taking the initiative.

Gu Yinian's eyes also fell on that rose, it was just a lonely one, it bloomed in the white ward, and it bloomed the only red in the world.

Why doesn't he want to?Possess, control, force.

But once he met Shu Xian's indifferent gaze, he knew he couldn't do it.

"Gu Yinian, let me tell you about the reason why I came to you. Why do I think it would be better for you to accompany Shu Xian? Because I met him a few days ago."

"Is he all right?"

"He's fine. He has a dog called...puhahahahaha..." Shen Yao said halfway, remembering the name of the little dog, and the atmosphere that was originally brewing ended with her laughter .

Gu Yinian's face was full of question marks, what a shocking name, worthy of Shen Yao laughing so wildly?

After a while, Shen Yao finally suppressed her smile.

"Forget it, it's better for him to tell you the name himself. Let's go over the name and say it."

Gu Yinian looked suspicious, feeling that there must be something hidden behind this.

After this smile, the original serious atmosphere could never come back, and Shen Yao couldn't help but relax a bit when speaking, "Do you think it's fun to raise a dog?"

"... Isn't it pretty good?" Gu Yinian couldn't adapt to Shen Yao's sudden relaxed tone, so he hesitated for a while before answering.

"Right? Taking care of pets is a loving thing! Shoveling dog poop and taking him for a walk every day, just thinking about it makes me feel good."

Shen Yao showed a yearning expression as she spoke. As a doctor, she has no time to raise a dog, so she has always lived alone. She is very envious of Shu Xian's life.

Gu Yinian also agreed with Shen Yao's words, but at the same time, he became even more confused.

Since Shu Xian has already started to live hard, why does Shen Yao still come to him?

"But ah." Shen Yao's eyes full of hope suddenly showed a hint of darkness, she turned around, "But his little dog got sick when he bought it, although he was cured, the sequelae were very serious."

"……so what?"

"Can't you feel it?" Shen Yao tilted her head, smiled, stared at Gu Yinian's face, and looked forward to Gu Yinian's next expression.

Doubt, puzzlement, doubt, guess, disbelief, self-doubt, panic.

Shen Yao read Gu Yinian's expression, when Gu Yinian looked up at her in shock, she knew that Gu Yinian also guessed it.

She nodded: "Shu Xian is not kind, he is not kind to people, but also to dogs, but he bought a sick dog."

Gu Yinian frowned.

Although Shu Xian is not kind, but raising a pet is a matter of personal affection. Everyone will be hit hard after the death of a beloved pet, which is irresistible.

So, Shu Xian...

"He still wants to die."

In the bright ward, Shen Yao's light and ethereal words seemed extremely clear and ethereal, reverberating in the ears, knocking hard on the heart one after another.

He still wanted to die.

When his dog died, he would jump off the cliff without hesitation.

"Shen Yao, you are also guessing."

"Well, we're all guessing." Shen Yao nodded, then stood up from her seat, and picked up the rose in the water glass.

The thorns on the rose branches have been carefully trimmed, and the drops of water are still dripping down because they were just taken out of the cup.

She handed the rose to Gu Yinian again.

"At the very least, you must hold his hope of living in your own hands, don't you? Don't push it to others, Gu Yinian, you can't guarantee that Xu Zhi will always be with him, and you can't guarantee that the dog will not die tomorrow. You can only promise yourself that you will always love him, won't you?"

Gu Yinian was silent.

Rose was also silent.

Today's weather is fine, and there is already spring outside the window.

The wind is rippling, the clouds are swaying, and the willows have sprouted new branches.

Such a beautiful morning, there should be a kiss.

"Flowers should be given to those you like." Shen Yao said again.

Gu Yinian took the rose from Shen Yao's hand.

Shen Yao took a step back, bowed slightly to him, then turned and left without looking back.

The ward was very quiet, the windows were open, and a gust of wind blew in, shaking the A4 files on the bedside table, making non-stop noises.

Gu Yinian pinched the flower branch, his fingers trembling slightly.

The mobile phone came into his hands at some point, and Shu Xian's phone number also appeared on the screen inexplicably.

Just when he was hesitating and wanted to dial out, the phone suddenly started to vibrate and the ringtone rang.

Shu Xian's name suddenly appeared on the screen.

Gu Yinian was stunned, looking at the phone call, he even forgot to answer it.

Finally, he pressed the green answer button, tremblingly put the phone to his ear, but dared not say a word.

The other side was also silent, only the faint sound of electricity squeaked, telling them that the call was real.

Another gust of wind shook the rose in his hand.

Gu Yinian pursed his lips, his hand holding the flower was even sweating, he opened his mouth, but made no sound.

There are so many things I want to say, so many things to say, but when I get to my mouth, it seems that nothing is appropriate, and finally I have nothing to say.

But his heart was too hot, hitting his chest repeatedly, as if he was going to punch a hole in his chest.

He misses him so much.

"Can I send you a rose?"

"Would you like to hear me play the guitar?"

Both ends of the phone rang at the same time.