dear psychiatrist

"Emotions are really unfair. Even though I have known you since I was a child, even if I saw you first, even if we are lovers, you are still attracted to someone else." Zhao Xiaoqi was still whispering to herself. He spoke, ignoring Zhuo Qihua who was at the side.These words didn't seem to be meant for Zhuo Qihua, just like Zhao Xiaoqi kept repeating her inner voice.

After a long time, Zhao Xiaoqi turned her head and looked at Zhuo Qihua with complicated eyes: "Qihua, what are you thinking?"

"Do you really want to hear my feelings? Xiaoqi, do you really want to know? When you left just now, you asked me if I liked you? Yes! I like you. I have liked you since childhood There is no doubt about this!"

Zhuo Qihua uttered the words in his heart in one breath, and after a pause, he heard her speak again: "It's just that I didn't realize until this moment that you are all my reliance and spiritual sustenance, just like... just Someone like my sister."

For Zhuo Qihua, Zhao Xiaoqi is all her affection and trust, while Tao Yaoyao represents a heartbeat that makes her obsessed.

Regarding Tao Yaoyao, Zhuo Qihua didn't know what he really thought.I just feel subconsciously wanting to get closer to her, to get a little closer, to get to know her better.

As Zhuo Qihua said at the beginning, she doesn't know how to love someone at all.Of course, this cannot be the reason for Zhuo Qihua to betray Zhao Xiaoqi.Therefore, she couldn't use this as an excuse to choose to escape out of inertia.

"I'm sorry, I did this wrong. However, I can assure you that from now on, similar things will never happen again. Tao Yaoyao... I won't see her again." Zhuo Qi Hua bit her lip, feeling an indescribable emotion churning in her chest.

Zhao Xiaoqi smiled wryly, Zhuo Qihua was really a naive child emotionally.What's the use of these so-called guarantees if Zhao Xiaoqi's heart is not on her?

But Zhuo Qihua didn't know what was going on in Zhao Xiaoqi's mind. Seeing that Zhao Xiaoqi didn't speak, Zhuo Qihua said on his own: "If you choose one person between you and Tao Yaoyao, I will choose... "

"Don't say it!" Hearing Zhao Xiaoqi sighed deeply, Zhuo Qihua forcibly held back the last word 'you'.

No one would want to hear a lover who has changed his mind at this moment, vowing to do multiple choice questions about his relationship, even Zhao Xiaoqi, who has always been intellectual and gentle.In fact, Zhao Xiaoqi didn't make a big fuss to let Zhuo Qihua go, which is already a very cultivated thing.

At this moment, Zhao Xiaoqi heard the sound of her heart breaking, and the taste of disappointment came to her mouth.He stretched out his right hand and gently stroked Zhuo Qihua's side face, that gentle movement moved Zhuo Qihua for a while.

Afterwards, Zhao Xiaoqi said softly: "Zhuo Qihua, let's break up, pretend we never met."

As Zhao Xiaoqi withdrew her right hand, Zhuo Qihua's heart suddenly felt empty, but he didn't want to say a word of persuasion in vain.Staring blankly at the ceiling, Zhuo Qihua once again felt that he was caught in the ruthless tearing of fate.

The night is hazy, and such a night can always bring people endless reverie.Ever since, Zhuo Qihua thought of her childhood physical education class, when playing in teams of threes and threes, she was always the one who was left alone, until she met Zhao Xiaoqi...

At this moment, Zhuo Qihua finally realized that he was left behind again, and became the one who was destined to be alone.

"I have a request. Before you figure out who the person you really love in your heart is, you are never allowed to pursue or accept anyone. Whatever you want to understand this request, it is probably because you can't get it by yourself, and you can't get it. Don't let others get your ideas. In short, you must promise me!" Zhao Xiaoqi rarely used this unquestionable tone, which seemed to show her work style.Zhuo Qihua didn't know how to answer, so he froze in place.

"Today, I, Zhao Xiaoqi, fell in love with you, and a girl named Tao Yaoyao appeared. How can you guarantee that when you hold Tao Yaoyao's hand tomorrow, another Tao Yaoyao will not appear?"

Facing Zhao Xiaoqi's questioning, Zhuo Qihua couldn't argue with anything.Obviously, what Zhao Xiaoqi said made sense.What should I do if I meet another Tao Yaoyao?After failing Zhao Xiaoqi, is he going to disappoint Tao Yaoyao?

Zhuo Qihua felt a burst of remorse arising out of guilt towards Zhao Xiaoqi.Facing Zhao Xiaoqi's request, Zhuo Qihua had no reason to refuse Zhao Xiaoqi, it was what she owed her.How to pay it back is all up to Zhao Xiaoqi to decide.

Lying upright on the bed, like a corpse that has lost its soul, Zhuo Qihua nodded numbly as a response to Zhao Xiaoqi.

Everything about Zhao Xiaoqi kept rolling in his mind, thinking of Zhao Xiaoqi's kindness, Zhuo Qihua's nose felt sore.But no matter what kind of reaction Zhuo Qihua gave Zhao Xiaoqi at this time, it couldn't heal Zhao Xiaoqi's wounded wound.

Unless... Zhuo Qihua turned back the time and never met Tao Yaoyao, and never fell in love with her.Or turn back the time to an earlier time and flatly reject Zhao Xiaoqi's confession.Can time go back?can it?

"I thought God asked me to meet you again to give me another chance. I don't want him to just make a joke with me, although the joke is not funny."

On such a night, on a double bed, Zhuo Qihua listened to Zhao Xiaoqi's intermittent recounting of the past.Inadvertently, Zhuo Qihua glanced out of the window, and it was almost dawn.Dawn was approaching, but He Zhuo Qihua still felt the bone-chilling cold.

Zhuo Qihua felt that Zhao Xiaoqi could be regarded as his mentor in life, and patiently taught himself to let go of the thorns in his body and work hard to integrate into the big world.Zhuo Qihua learned quickly and well, and learned to integrate into society with enthusiasm and melt a person's heart.But this enthusiasm finally burned Zhao Xiaoqi.

"Qihua, in the future, don't give hope to anyone easily. After you give her hope, you will suddenly take away this hope." Zhao Xiaoqi said, suddenly pressing on Zhuo Qihua's body, kissing her lips. I kissed him deeply.

Slowly move the lips down, and finally keep the lips at the position of Zhuo Qihua's heart.After a long time, Zhao Xiaoqi lay down on her side of the bed again, and said softly: "Qihua, I planted a teardrop in your heart."

Suddenly thought of the story of Zhizunbao and Zixia Fairy, Zixia Fairy left a tear in Zhizunbao's heart.Before I had time to think about the inner monologue of Supreme Treasure in the movie, Zhao Xiaoqi said in a hoarse voice: "Qihua, I regret it. The biggest mistake I made in my life was to let you know my bottom line. Let you know that I love you."

Zhao Xiaoqi is a simple person. If love is to give silently, and being loved is to take recklessly, then, between loving and being loved, she will never choose the former.How can love be chosen by people?Love will not appear or end as I arranged.

Zhuo Qihua didn't say anything more, a wave of regret came over him, and he suddenly understood Zhao Xiaoqi's regret.

Zhao Xiaoqi looked at Zhuo Qihua with a complicated expression, but Zhuo Qihua did not dare to turn his head to look at Zhao Xiaoqi.Finally, I understood, what kind of mistake Zhao Xiaoqi said was a huge mistake.

I also understand why even though the couple kept talking, they were still friends after breaking up, but in the end they chose never to see each other again.

The moment Zhuo Qihua nodded and agreed to date, the relationship between her and Zhao Xiaoqi had changed from being best friends for many years to a couple.And such a transformation is just a one-way ticket with no return.

How many good friends are eager to get closer to each other.But when I wanted to go back, I realized that there were some things, and I could never go back!This is probably the realistic version of the love-hate entanglement in Qian Zhongshu's "Fortress Besieged".

As for the lovers after breaking up, no matter how they try to cover up the scar in their hearts, it's just a performance with all their strength.If you still have love in your heart, then you can't get along with friends normally, how can you go back to the past?If there is no love in the heart, and the two claim to be happier after breaking up, isn't that a mockery of the love they once had?

It seems that the person in the world who knows me best is not me.Instead, she was lying beside her, accompanied by Zhao Xiaoqi throughout her youth.

Although she doesn't want to admit it, what Zhuo Qihua has to admit is that she is a complete idiot when it comes to feelings.From the beginning when Zhao Xiaoqi proposed dating, to now it is Zhao Xiaoqi who proposed to break up.

From the beginning to the end of this love affair that came and went in a hurry, Zhuo Qihua never expressed any opinions.Ever since, in Zhao Xiaoqi's view, what was originally a love affair between two people has become her own wishful thinking.

Stretching out his hand to touch the puddle of moisture in his heart, Zhuo Qihua kept wriggling his Adam's apple up and down, trying to restrain the urge to hold Zhao Xiaoqi and cry.

For the first time, I felt that I was so cowardly, as if I had given Zhao Xiaoqi an empty joy, but I didn't dare to nod to Zhao Xiaoqi to admit that it was really just a daydream after the fireworks cleared.