Water lanterns and dreams in 1 nights

What a calm look on your face tells me you don't hate.Even so, it should be quite reasonable to suspect that you want to kill me. Whether you like to talk about aunt or not, there should be an explanation for things out of a sense of responsibility. I am too familiar with killing intent to deceive myself and say that I have not felt it from you .

I stay out behind closed doors, let go of housework, and push everything to you, so that you have to worry about me while dealing with funerals, work, and daily life. Ordinary, handle all matters in an orderly manner, do not complain or ask me a word, I step back step by step, you naturally take over the space I gave up, and continue to live in an orderly manner, so that you take care of me, I step back Going back again, I hope you can knock on the door and pull me out of the dark room to see the sky, but you never did.I waited and waited, and made the final retreat. I asked you to put the food at the door, and I hid behind the door, pressed my ears tightly to the door, and waited for your movement with bated breath.I heard your footsteps, heard your footsteps from far to near, stopped in front of the door, and then knocked on the door.I seemed to be saved, only to find out that nothing had changed at all, you still don't need me, the fact is that I'm worthless.

I'm not afraid of you killing me, I'm afraid it's useless to you, I reached out and grabbed you as my connection with this world, you never made a gesture of holding back.I don't believe that you don't have emotional fluctuations. It's just that neither I nor Aunt Tan can force you to move. Maybe one day you will meet someone who is aggressive and will let you understand a little bit of pain, loss, and parting.

Here, I can only say goodbye to you.

Also, how I look forward to seeing your surprised face. "

I put down the letter, and felt some kind of ominous atmosphere from the brush strokes. The rain had stopped, and there was silence everywhere.I leaned back in the chair, took off my glasses, and let out a long sigh of relief.I didn't expect it to be like this from his point of view. It's good in a way. I don't depend on him or anyone else. I thought I needed Yoshiko to be by my side to remind me to pretend to be human, but I can barely do it myself. .I have the means to make a living, the ability to be independent, and I don't understand Xiuyi enough to make him develop these sensitive and delicate emotions. In this regard, I was inspired by his letters.

But I can't accept his narrative wholeheartedly.Human beings are wonderful creatures who instinctively seek advantages and avoid disadvantages. Stories told from different angles are very likely to be very different. Moreover, people are good at imposing psychological hints on themselves, and even their memories can be tampered with.Just like it's hard for me to imagine that a young child can be so unlucky that all the host families want to start with him.

I walked out of the study room and pushed open the door of Xiuyi's room. The door was unlocked and opened as soon as I pushed it.The windows in the house are closed, the desk lamp is dim, Xiuyi is lying in his clothes, and the quilt is neatly folded at the foot of the bed. Covered with a quilt.As I approached gradually, Xiuyi curled up on his side, as if he was asleep, with a slight smile on his lips, I called his name a few times, and shook his shoulder lightly, but Xiuyi didn't agree, so I moved closer and called out again, Smelling the fresh air of bitter almonds from his mouth, he fell into a deep sleep unconsciously.

He died on a breezy spring night in the 22nd year of Zhaohua.

In another half a year, I will deal with the matter at hand and set off to return to my long-lost hometown, the place where Ryoko and I grew up together. It has not been affected by war for a while, and it may still remain peaceful many years ago. I understand that everything will not last long. When we meet again, I think people and things are not as good as memories, but I am still willing to try to get back to Duanhe's state of mind there.I buried Xiuyi next to Liangzi’s tomb, and placed a plate of plump orange persimmons in front of their respective tombstones. Looking at the black and white photos they posted on the monuments, I felt that they should be able to rest in peace now.At that time, I had no way of pursuing the truth, and I had no interest in pursuing it, so I let it die with the deceased.

The book I wrote about the massacre got printed.

I heard that Zuo Linze, the former principal of Shenye Elementary School, and a few teachers were arrested for treasonous parties. Since then, I haven’t heard any news about them. I don’t know if they are still alive. The girl who only met once, I don’t know where she is now, but she still holds goodwill to the world, combing her neat braids and smiling slyly. I don’t know the answer, so I don’t think about it anymore and continue to live my life.Nothing special happened in the second half of my life.

third night

42. Pierrot 01

Puchi-

The match was scratched on the rough leather, a yellow flame danced on the thin matchstick, the dark body was shimmering, and the pungent smell of burning red phosphorus diffused.

"So, do you want to eat today?" the young man asked. After the match was lit, an exaggerated smiling face appeared, with smiling eyes and blood-red lips curled up on both sides, looking at me enthusiastically.

"Not yet." I replied.

The lights went out.

The young man sighed heavily, kicking and pacing in the darkness that I couldn't see. "Sad, sad." He muttered, it's really weird, how can I think that the person who should be so sad at this time should be me, involuntarily stalemate in this strange room for a week, during which he was under his surveillance almost the whole time Under the circumstances, all contact with the outside world was severed.

"Turn on the lights," I said.

"Is it a request?" He suddenly got excited.

"Drive it if you want." I didn't want to make him too proud, so I replied coldly on purpose.

"If it makes you happy, of course I'm willing to do anything." He said hypocritically, but he didn't mean to move at all. I was impatient to deal with him, so I just dealt with everything in silence. In this way, he was very boring and no one Talking, I had to obediently turn on the lights. This person is really sick. All the windows are covered with wooden boards to block the light tightly. Even in the daytime, it is as dark as a basement. The lights in the whole house have been removed. There was just a useless projector in the middle of the ceiling in the living room, and I told him to turn on the light, so he turned on the projector and cast a square of white light on the wall.

I haven't seen the light for a long time, and it takes a while to get used to the not very bright white light before I can fully open my eyes.I was originally sitting in the middle of the living room facing the window and he turned my chair the other way and had to watch him go back and forth in the white light of the projector, doing magic tricks and juggling and doing uninteresting antics Performed, carnivaled for himself, took off his hat and bowed, as if there were a thousand audiences sitting in the audience, he made himself out of breath, and asked with a smile: "Are you hungry, dear?" I told him Unmoved by the title that was too sticky, he drooped his eyebrows and sighed again, "Why bother, I promise you all good meat."

"It's raw."

"Of course it was raw," he said.

"Then I refuse."

"Okay." He pretended to give in, "but you know my dear, you will definitely accept my food, it's just a matter of time." He walked up to me slowly, pinched my chin and looked me around , "Look at you, it's pathetic to make yourself so thin."

If Fuyuki had heard these words, she would definitely roll her eyes full of contempt and incomparable excellence, thanks to the lunatic in front of her, she is not here, her whereabouts are unknown, my life is messed up, and I There is only one reason why I am still sitting here. My hands are tied with bandages, and my body is also tied to the back of the chair with bandages, so I cannot move.

"As long as you dare to let me go—"

"Are you going to kill me?" The hand that clasped my chin tightened, and it hurt a lot. He got excited and put his face close to my face. I could feel his breath blending with my nose, which made me a little sick .

"I will kill you." I won't, and it doesn't prevent me from saying this.

He stared at me for a long time, like a snake staring at a frog, although I suspected that I couldn't see anything at such a close distance, he suddenly laughed wildly, took my cheek and kissed my lips hard I took a bite and my lips were bleeding, "well," he said, with my blood still on his lips, his lips looked even redder, and sometimes, the person's appearance is quite deceptive, like No one knows that this guy who looks like Snow White is actually the poison queen. When he smiles at you, he misses you dead.I rarely regret anything, and now I can't help but start to regret my decision to be roommates with him. "Honey, it's just that you have to think about how to lure me to take off the bandage first." He said softly, rubbing my injured lips roughly with his thumb.After he withdrew his hand, I realized that I could have bit off his finger just now.If I'm fast enough.

He moved a chair and sat cross-legged across from me, and asked seemingly puzzled, "Ah Guang, why don't you want to eat?"

"Fear of parasites."

He scratched his curly black hair, and there was a little light in his hazel eyes, "It's really picky." He shook his head helplessly, "But you will change your mind soon."

"Maybe, but not now." Said that the parasite is a little far away, and the food and water provided every time will make me weak for a few days. This is the main reason for my rejection. Compared with losing all strength after eating food, hunger The reaction wasn't that strong. "When will you let me go?"

He wags his finger in front of his nose and corrects, "Not to let you go, but to come with me." He insists on his argument, "Once you round this bend, we'll be working together soon. I I can be your guardian, you are my little chick, and no one will be able to separate us at that time. If it goes well, you will love me and worship me."

I mock