throwing gentle gl

Lu Zizheng didn't know how he supported himself back home.As soon as she entered the house, she saw her mother standing in the porch, looking at herself worriedly.She turned around, tried her best to control her trembling hands, and then gently closed the door, then squatted down to get the cotton mop, and asked her mother as if nothing happened: "Mom, what's wrong with you? look at me."

Mother Lu called her warmly: "Zhengzheng..."

Lu Zizheng put his cold and unconscious feet into the shoes with difficulty, raised his head and forced a smile at his mother, pretending to respond relaxedly: "Hey..." But just as she was about to stand up, she couldn't help it. Her feet went limp, and she fell into the arms of her mother who stepped forward to pick her up.Only then did Lu Zizheng sadly discover that she was really so powerless.

Mother Lu hurriedly helped Lu Zizheng stand upright, her eyes were red, and she no longer asked what happened to Lu Zizheng and Jiang Huaixi, she just silently helped Lu Zizheng walk to the living room with difficulty, sat on the sofa, Then, he went to the bathroom to help Lu Zizheng fetch hot water.

Lu Zizheng leaned back on the sofa, closed his eyes and raised his head, trying his best to restrain himself, his breathing was heavy and heavy, and the muscles of his cheeks were trembling imperceptibly...

Mother Lu brought out two basins of hot water, tested the temperature, and then carefully put Lu Zizheng's cold feet into the water.

Lu Zizheng opened his eyes suddenly, leaned forward, grabbed Mother Lu's arm, stopped Mother Lu from soaking her feet, and said in a hoarse voice, "How can I ask Mom to help me take care of it?" Foot bath?!"

Mother Lu looked at her distressedly, and sighed, "Silly boy..."

When Lu Zizheng heard Mother Lu's sigh of pity and love, his nose suddenly became sore, and the tears that he had endured for a long time finally came out of his eyes.She pulled her mother to sit beside her, buried her head in her mother's neck, and hugged Lu's mother tightly with her hands, crying silently.Lu's mother only felt the icy cold wetness in the pit of her neck, which made her so worried that she almost shed tears.

Lu's mother didn't dare to ask her what was wrong, so she hugged her back, patted Lu Zizheng's back lightly with one hand, and comforted her softly: "Zhengzheng, don't cry, mom is here, everything will be fine, and everything will pass. ..."

Lu Zizheng cried so much that her whole body was trembling, but she didn't make a sound. Finally, she finally wiped away her tears, raised her head, smiled at Mother Lu with red eyes, and said in a hoarse voice, "Mom, it's okay, It's fine if I cry, don't worry, I'm fine..."

Lu's mother looked at her forced smile, felt her heart ached, and responded to her warmly: "Well, mother believes in you, mother is not worried..." After finishing speaking, she turned her head away and quickly wiped the corners of her eyes Couldn't hold back the overflowing tears.

Silly boy, how can you let your mother feel at ease like this.

Mother Lu was still worried that Lu Zizheng would be affected by her mood and lose her appetite, but she never expected that Lu Zizheng's dinner was about the same as usual.Mother Lu knew that Lu Zizheng was trying her best to hide herself, but she didn't want to expose her scars, so she had no choice but to cooperate with her.

After eating, Lu Zizheng nestled into his room, euphemistically saying that he wanted to take a bath and go to bed early, saying that after all, he had to go to work again from tomorrow, so he wanted to seize the last good time and have a good sleep Feel like a good dream.

Mother Lu doesn't know Lu Zizheng's routine, not to mention it's just after seven o'clock, even if she lies in bed in the early morning, she can't fall asleep, and she has to go through a lot of tossing and turning to fall asleep, let alone a good sleep .But she also knew that what Lu Zizheng needed more now was to be alone, so she pretended not to know anything, readily agreed to her, and said: "Get up early tomorrow morning, don't be on the first day of the new year." It’s not good to be late for work.”

Lu Zizheng blinked his eyes and replied with a smile: "Mom, don't worry about it. How can I be so good?"

Mother Lu smiled and said, "I know how to brag..."

Lu Zizheng returned to the room with eager and flustered steps, closed the door, and before turning on the light, went straight to the bathroom equipped in the bedroom, squatted next to the toilet, and vomited out the dinner that he had just forced himself to eat , vomited straight feet numb and tears stayed, and then sat paralyzed on the ground, motionless.

After a long time, she regained a little strength, went out of the bathroom, went to the bedroom to get a change of underwear and pajamas, and went into the bathroom to take a shower.

She turned the shower on to the maximum, soaked her whole body for a moment, and couldn't open her eyes, and the next moment, tears overflowed from the corners of her eyes, unscrupulous.She felt her face was wet, but she lied to herself, Mom, I'm not crying, it's water, don't worry...

Lu Zizheng didn't know how long she had been washing, until the skin all over her body began to wrinkle, she finally turned off the water, dried her body and hair and left the bathroom.

Without turning on the light, she climbed onto the bed in the dark, curled up her legs, hugged her knees with her hands, and stared blankly at the clock hanging on the wall by the moonlight, watching the second hand beating every second.

It is said that life is in a hurry and time is precious, but at this moment, Lu Zizheng felt that every minute and every second seemed so long, she could hardly find the meaning of time to her, besides suffering, it was still suffering.

She tortured herself in her heart, whether there should be no expectations in life. The Buddha said that all living beings are suffering, and people are born to suffer to repay the debts of the previous life, so the first sound they made was crying.Why is she always unable to learn, without such awareness?

In the dark, Lu Zizheng touched the ugly scar on his wrist little by little, and along the scar, he touched the watch that Jiang Huaixi gave her, the cold and thick strap.Her fingertips gently rubbed the watch strap, and finally couldn't help laughing, and cried again...

It's not Jiang Huaixi's fault for being too gentle, it's his self-righteousness; it's not Jiang Huaixi's fault for not being able to give her love, it's his insatiable greed.

From beginning to end, Jiang Huaixi was right.It's all my own fault.

But, Huaixi, don't you think it's not good to stay like this all the time?

Kexin has deviated from the normal track, how should she continue to move forward as usual?

Lu Zizheng got up suddenly, opened the drawer, took out the lock of hair that Jiang Huaixi left on her pillow, and looked at it for a long time with gentle eyes.Finally, she got out of bed, opened the window, slowly untied the red rope tied with her hair, and stretched out the window, wanting to wave her hand heavily, so that all the nostalgia would be like this scattered blue hair Generally, Gone With the Wind...

But she raised her hand, but in the end, she didn't let go.

Lu Zizheng looked at the hair in his hand with a wry smile for a long time, then closed the window and returned to the bed.She took off the watch on her wrist and put it in the deepest drawer together with her hair. From then on, just like her thoughts on Jiang Huaixi, she was locked in a dark place and could no longer see the light of day.

After doing all this, she ignored her wet hair and collapsed on the bed weakly, curled up into a ball...

The night was really long and long, so cold and cold... The empty wrist was extremely chilly, running along the wrist and reaching the heart, making Lu Zizheng shiver...

Lu Zizheng finally opened her eyes and waited for the dawn. The tears on her face had already dried up. She laughed weakly at herself, it was another new day.She sat up, took out her mobile phone, hesitated all night, and finally made up her mind.

I found the contact list, shook my hands slightly, dragged Jiang Huaixi into the blacklist, and then deleted all call and text messages...

So be it, break it, forget it.

Lu Zizheng silently said countless words in his heart: Huaixi, I'm sorry.

To be a couple, we lack fate; but to pretend to be friends, I have less talent.sorry.

Lu Zizheng put on heavy makeup, which was rare, to cover up the redness of his eyes and his pale complexion, and went to work at the translation agency on time.After the plenary meeting, the president left Lu Zizheng behind and told her to report to Fengshang in the afternoon.

Lu Zizheng was exhausted, and he didn't have any energy to deal with Lian Xuan's hot and cold, eager to talk. Without any hesitation, he handed over such a great business to others.But the president said that Lian Xuan asked her by name, obviously, it was also very embarrassing.

Fengshang signed a contract with the translation agency last year, confirming a long-term cooperative relationship. The president of the translation agency has been kind to her, and Lu Zizheng is embarrassed to make him too difficult.After thinking about it, Lu Zizheng reluctantly agreed.

Her heart was dead, and from then on, love and hate had nothing to do with her.Lian Xuan or others, in fact, what is the difference.

In the afternoon, Lu Zizheng went to the fashion report as scheduled. Lian Xuan took every opportunity to go on a business trip to Linshi to deal with a big business, leaving only the second secretary to give Lu Zizheng some information and inform her to go to Japan with her on a business trip tomorrow. , due to the urgent time, Lu Zizheng must be familiar with this business as soon as possible.

Lu Zizheng hugged the information and laughed dumbfoundedly.It's okay, I'm busy, maybe I can really forget everything.

That night, Lu Zizheng took a taxi back to Mama Lu's house to have dinner with Mama Lu, and told her that she was going on a business trip to Japan.

After hesitating for a long time, Lu Zizheng added in a low voice: "Mom, if possible, try not to bother Huaixi." After finishing speaking, she didn't dare to look up at Lu's mother's expression.

Unexpectedly, Lu's mother agreed to her calmly and said: "Okay, I will listen to you."

Lu Zizheng looked up at Mama Lu in surprise, but only saw the understanding and kindness in Mama Lu's eyes. For a moment, she felt relieved.No matter how the world changes, her mother will always be her strongest backing. This is the only firm belief she has left in this world now.

But Lu Zizheng did not expect that the next day, as soon as she got on the plane, Mother Lu would call Jiang Huaixi.

Mother Lu's voice was always gentle, and she didn't treat Jiang Huaixi in the slightest because of the unhappiness between Lu Zizheng and Jiang Huaixi: "Huaixi, Zizheng is on a business trip to Japan again. When is it convenient for you, come and chat with Auntie .”

In the independent ward of the Jiang Family Hospital, Jiang Huaixi sat up, narrowed his eyes slightly, and then replied warmly to Lu's mother, "Okay, auntie, but I have to wait a few more days, I'm on a business trip these days , I won’t be back until a few days later.”

Mother Lu smiled lovingly on the other end of the phone, and said indifferently: "It's okay, Auntie can wait as long as you want. On the day you come, call Auntie early, and Auntie will prepare delicious food for you."

Jiang Huaixi gave a rare childish laugh, and said softly, "Okay, Auntie."

She turned her head to look out the window, the sky was still gloomy.When will it be the first snow after the snow?

That day, after Lu Zizheng left, Jiang Huaixi squatted in the snow for a long time, until the sky was dark and he could no longer see the deep footprints that Lu Zizheng turned and left, Jiang Huaixi bit his lips and blushed his eyes I took my frozen feet out of the snow, put on my shoes, and returned to the car with difficulty.

She had almost lost feeling in her feet and couldn't drive, so she had to call someone to come and drive her back.

After returning home, Jiang Huaixi only felt dizzy in his head, his body was sore and weak, and he didn't even eat any food. He simply washed his body, went to bed, and fell asleep in a daze...

When he woke up again, Jiang Huaixi only felt that his throat was dry and painful, and his whole body was hot and uncomfortable as if he was on fire.She opened her eyes and wanted to raise her hands to sit up, but when she raised her hands, she found a thin, straight needle stuck in the back of her hand.She turned her head and looked up, and sure enough, another drip was hanging on the head of the bed...

Jiang Huaixi looked at the drip tube, and watched the liquid inside drop by drop, drop by drop, and suddenly, anger came from his heart.She sat up suddenly, desperately pulled off the needle, took the hose, and threw out the hanging medicine.She had never been so annoyed and resentful like that moment, powerless and unwilling to destroy everything, almost wanting to vent all the grievances and unwillingness of these years.

Jiang Wang came in with the medicinal soup, and what he saw was Jiang Huaixi standing under the bed with bare feet, the quilt slipped on the floor, stained with a little bright red, and he looked up along the red, only to see that the back of Jiang Huaixi's hand was in the same place. Blood oozes out bit by bit...

She put the medicine soup by the door, and quickly stepped forward, took out the alcohol and cotton swabs from the medicine box, and grabbed Jiang Huaixi's hand to stop her bleeding.It was the first time that Jiang Huaixi lost control like that in front of her, stretched out his hand and pushed her away fiercely, and growled in a hoarse voice: "Go away, I'm tired of this kind of life, I don't want to live it, I don't want to live it... "At the end of the sentence, there is already a faint cry.

Jiang Wang and Jiang Huaixi have known each other for nearly ten years, and it was the first time that she saw Jiang Huaixi's fragile appearance, which has always been calm and self-sufficient. Said: "Have you had a fever and burned your brain? Why are you crazy?!"

Jiang Huaixi was severely reprimanded by her, and finally, gradually calmed down, but her heart became more and more sad.She returned to her usual appearance, smiled weakly, and apologized: "I'm sorry, I was sorry just now."

Jiang Wang didn't even look at her, got up, took the medicine and hung it up again, grabbed Jiang Huaixi's other good hand, held the needle, bit by bit, slowly pierced the flesh, and pushed the needle in .

Because her movements were too slow, Jiang Huaixi was in severe pain, but she still held back her silence.

After Jiang Wangwang finished getting the needle, he raised his head and asked maliciously in a cold voice, "Does it hurt?"

Jiang Huaixi snorted softly, but did not answer her.Jiang Wang definitely did it on purpose!

Jiang Wang didn't seem to care about her silence, he packed up the medicine box, then went to the door, carefully brought the medicine soup to Jiang Huaixi's bedside, and then asked again: "Does it still hurt so much now?"

Jiang Huaixi looked at her, was silent for a while, and then replied: "It's better."

Jiang Wang seemed to understand it, and said with a light smile: "Look, no matter how hard the pain is, it will tend to ease with the passage of time, why should you be too pessimistic, because it will eventually disappear. Suffering for a while.” After she finished speaking, she handed the medicinal soup to Jiang Huaixi and asked her to drink it.

Jiang Huaixi seemed to be staring at her deeply for a long time before replying: "If pain can prove that everything once existed, then I am willing to suffer for a long time."

Jiang Wang was startled, chuckled, turned and left.

But Jiang Huaixi asked her the moment she turned around: "If the pain can really ease and disappear with time, then, Jiang Wang, have you forgotten it?"

Jiang Wang paused as he left, the faint smile on his face gradually disappeared, and in the end, he just left in silence.