little city

little,

Are you OK?You must be surprised to see my letter, right?Originally, we could open up our hearts and talk about the world, everything from everything in the universe to small human relationships.I cherish you as a friend, you know?

Watching you turn and leave, I know you must be heartbroken, and so am I;

Watching you pass by, I know you must suddenly want to look back, why not me.

We are all the same, in the whirlpool of love, it is difficult to extricate ourselves.

We are different, you can bravely pursue love.and I?My love is forever inseparable.

Yuchen and I are classmates from elementary school to junior high school to high school. He is a kind and loving boy just like you.We fell in love very early, he cared for me and protected me like my own brother.In the summer vacation of the freshman year of high school, we went to a summer camp in Beijing together. It was the first time we traveled away from our parents. When we were climbing the Great Wall, he held my hand and stood on the highest beacon tower of the Great Wall. He said that he would love me all his life. Hi, we are naturally together.We treated summer camp like a love trip, and we stuck together like glue every day, and those were wonderful years.

After we go back, we will be like the couples at that age, bickering, jealous, not talking for a few days, and then reconciled quickly.He is good at studying, and he is going to be admitted to a university in Beijing, and I am not bad at studying.We discussed going to the same university. He will study law and I will study literature. After graduation, we will return to our hometown together. He will work as a civil servant and I will teach. Then we will get married, have children, and live a happy life together.

My hometown is a county-level city. My father is a civil servant and my mother is an elementary school teacher. I am their apple and their hope.They have been strict with me since I was a child, and I have always been at the top of my studies. Maybe like me, I study well, and girls with good looks are more attractive to boys. There are boys who wrote love letters to me in elementary school. My mother saw it and educated that boy. After a meal.But at that time, I was still young, and my parents were always protecting me, so boys didn't dare to have unreasonable thoughts about me.

After I went to high school, many boys in my class liked me again.At that time, there was an ignorant boy who began to pursue me in the first year of high school, and often pestered me on the way home after school, which was very hateful.After Yuchen found out, he sent me home every day, and I felt more at ease.That boy hated Yuchen very much.

After the two of us were together in the second year of high school, that boy also dropped out of school. I seemed to have escaped bad luck, and went to and after school happily every day.At that time, Yuchen was everything to me.

However, all this beautiful things changed completely during last summer vacation.One night, I came home from school after making up lessons, and Yuchen and I had a fight that day, so I rode away early.Walking halfway, suddenly, it began to rain. I didn't bring an umbrella, so I leaned against the eaves at the entrance of the alley to avoid the rain.At this time, a person came from the alley, shaking his head and looking indecent. I wanted to walk away, but because of the rain, I took chances and didn't move.When he walked over, I realized that it was the boy from the first year of high school.He didn't recognize me until he walked over, so he walked up to me, moved his feet, and asked me to accompany them to drink.Of course I refused, so he came up to hug me and kiss me.I threatened him to touch me again, so I yelled. Unexpectedly, he went further and hugged me, covering my mouth with his hands. I felt it was difficult to breathe, and I was so scared that I couldn't stand up.At this moment, Yuchen rushed over for some reason, and pushed down the little rascal from behind.The little hooligan became enraged, suddenly pulled out the dagger from his pocket and stabbed it, Yuchen fell down with a plop.I shouted loudly, help, help.When the little hooligan saw that he had stabbed someone, he was also frightened, and ran away in a hurry.

The rain was getting heavier and heavier, and Yuchen's blood mixed with the rainwater, dyeing the surroundings blood red.I hugged him desperately and cried bitterly.He was still able to talk at first, saying it was fine, that it was cold, and that he didn't want to die.I frantically ran to the side of the road to stop the car, but after Yuchen was sent to the hospital, he was not rescued.

He died, and so he died, leaving me alone.

At that time, I didn't know how to live. I was very depressed, didn't think about food and drink, couldn't sleep all night, had nightmares again and again, and even had the tendency of self-harm.Once I stood at the intersection where Yuchen died, standing helplessly, wishing that passing vehicles would kill me.

When I entered the third year of high school, I changed schools, but I couldn't keep up with my studies.I became tired of studying, but fortunately I had a good background, so I was admitted to a university in a small town in a daze.

For more than a year, I washed my face with tears every day. I have no friends and nowhere to talk. I always feel that Yuchen is by my side and protects me as before.Until I met you, I saw too many shadows of him from you. When you walked through the rain and gave me an umbrella, I felt in a trance that it was Yuchen running over, even the posture of your running was so imaginative .I can't control my longing for Yuchen, tears burst out of the embankment, intertwined with the rain, and flowed to the ground.If sadness can be taken away by the rain, how much I want the heavy rain to last for a while; if the lover only appears in the rain, how much I want the heavy rain to never stop.

I knew it was all an illusion, but at that moment it was so real that I couldn't control my emotions.Even when it's not raining, I always feel Yuchen is by my side, not to mention the rainy day we both like.

do you know?From the day I got on the train, I have a kind of intimacy with you, a feeling of déjà vu. You two are so similar, upright, kind, and responsible, and the outline of your facial features reveals a clean temperament.But I deeply know that you are not him, and he will not be you.

That night, when you called me, you were just worried about what happened to you, but seeing you drinking, I knew what was going on.I'm so scared. On the one hand, I can't bear to lose you as a friend. Although I have known you for a short time, you have become an important person in my life in this small town; on the other hand, I still can't accept your love. I don't know how to face all this, I really hope you can hold back and don't confess your love, so that we can continue to get along naturally.Thinking of losing you as a friend makes me even more painful.

I had a violent ideological struggle before I could say that sentence.Because I don't want to own your love selfishly, this is the greatest respect for your love.I can't tell you the whole truth, this is the greatest respect for Yuchen's love.

After you left, I sat on the stool behind the flower bed and couldn't help crying bitterly.I don't know what to do, this is not the result I want?This is not the result you want, is it?

I originally thought that we would be fine if we were indifferent for a few days, but I didn't expect that you didn't come to the traditional culture class, you didn't come to the English salon, and you didn't come to the activities of the Zen Society.You just disappeared from the world without leaving a trace.

My heart felt a little sad, a little flustered, a little tangled, thinking of the way you left angrily that day, tears flowed down unconsciously.These tears flow for myself, for me, and for this poor and humble love.

This incident dealt a great blow to me. My already sad mood was made worse. I lost my appetite every day, suffered from insomnia all night, and became even more depressed.

When I saw you in the library, I was very happy, at least to see that you did not sink, did not fall, and this is one of the reasons why I admire you.No matter how big a blow you experience, you can always continue to restore a positive attitude towards life through self-regulation.And I, can't do it.

do you know?How much I want to accept your love, but it's not fair to you.Today I will tell you the whole truth, I dare not be too demanding, I only hope that I can be friends with you forever.

Jing Shu.

After reading the letter, I was already in tears.I think of Yuchen's great love for Jingshu, and the mental pain that Jingshu endured, all of which are beyond ordinary emotions.In comparison, the love I gave was as light as a feather, and the pain of losing my love was even less worth mentioning.I feel remorseful and sad, and eagerly want to see Jingshu.

I quickly came out of the library and ran to the gazebo.I have a premonition that Jingshu must be in the gazebo.

We stand by the vines of the gazebo, as we did when we met.My hands were trembling, and I bravely stepped forward to hold Jing Shu in my arms.

Under the soft light and shadow, the shadows are mottled, we hug each other face to face, the light and shade match, you are in my heart, and I am in your light and shadow.