[Comprehensive] Yes, this is a university

X year X month X day

I haven't written a diary for a long time.

In fact, I was not a person who could persevere. Looking forward, it is a small miracle that I didn't give up halfway when I was a child.

Looking at those daily routines now, page by page constitutes who I am today, with a calm mind, no resentment, and no unwillingness.

Another season passed by, and in the continuous summer rain, the misty and withered flowers were blown by the wind and knocked on the window casement, and the glass was covered with rain marks.

I received the admission letter from the university today. It is a great school in W City, and there are no shortcomings except for the location.With the end of the college entrance examination, those papers, those thick exercise books that have been written are all useless.

Useless things will be thrown away, or they can only stay in the corner and turn yellow. I have written countless love letters to the second child who has a crush on human beings, and I have also made countless phone calls to my parents, and I am even full of confidence Make a friend plan, and yell about having hundreds of friends.

Then, after graduating from high school, I was thinking about what to do as an adult.

- no direction.

I don't have anything in particular that I want to do, nor do I have a hobby that I particularly like. Such a person must not be able to become a reliable adult.

Even if I studied art, I went to study choreography and directing, but I was just following the trend, not because I love it deeply.

However, the future may have an answer.

——About [love] and [feelings], as well as [struggle] and [effort], as well as [friendship] and [family].

Even if Baili Xi said that he was invulnerable to iron walls, he was actually a coward.There are many things that I dare not fight for. Because I am afraid of being abandoned, I choose to keep a distance from others first. Because I am afraid of being hated, I start hating myself first.

Is it difficult to "love this world"?

If you really can’t find something to love, then go out for a walk, go to Iceland to see the matcha-colored volcano, the black diamond beach, dive in Palau, see colorful jellyfish, and Tbilisi, where you can soak in hot springs , the night view of the Peace Bridge, the bars in Ireland, the Great Fjord in Norway, the street singers in Serbia, the national park in Palma, and Chile, which Neruda called "my thin motherland"...

Although I stumbled and stumbled in the first half of my life, I have walked along the way anyway, and I believe that the rest of my life will probably be good.

This is the last time I write a diary, and there is only the last page left in this book, which is the seal of my journey to adulthood.

In the end, I want to say:

"Bailixi."

"You have to meet a lot of people, you have to live as you want, you have to make friends, you have to love yourself, and then fall in love with this ugly world."

……

……

……

I lowered my arms and blinked my wet eyes helplessly: "Forget it, she's a nice person anyway, and she will definitely forgive you."

——I have always separated Baili Xi from the past from the current self. That child is optimistic and gentle, so good that it is unbelievable. He is really like a little sun that can shine.

I can probably understand why she did this, but I feel that if it were me now, I would never make such a decision again.

Just like loving someone so deeply that I love everything about him, I will never be able to do it.

Saiki Kusuo pursed his lips, looking not in a good mood.He didn't speak, but kept staring at me with those deep purple eyes, as if he was hiding countless turbulent emotions but sank in his heart.

"Also..." I paused, and looked back at the other party earnestly, "Please don't do the behavior just now, I feel very troubled."

"Eh—what what? Troubled?"

The sudden voice of a third person interrupted the words I had planned, and the crisp and rising tone was so familiar that I couldn't help but twitch my eyes, and then silently stared at the figure rushing from the other end of the garden.

A certain orange-haired young man was still holding the small cake from the reception hall just now. Damn it, it turned out to be matcha-flavored, why didn't I see it before.

"Little assistant!" Xuzhi ran over, smiling so brightly, that I even took three steps back, and my skin was about to get goosebumps.

I saw the inhuman Atobe Keigo behind him, both of them had that kind of gleaming face, my eyebrows twitched, and an ominous premonition rose in my heart: "Wait for you want--"

Sure enough, before I finished speaking, this man rushed up with the matcha cake, his oily fingers were about to rub against his face, and I was so scared that I pushed him away.

Unprepared, Xuzhi was pushed and twisted on the pillar, with a few tears coming out of the corners of his eyes, pointing at me while pretending to cry and complaining: "You! You pushed me! Scumbag! You once swore to love me for the rest of your life, but now Pushing me to the ground, I really only see the newcomers laughing and the old ones cry!"

Keigo Atobe: "..." This man has a lot of drama.

Saiki Kusuo: "..." What a mess.

I was stiff again, and the corners of my mouth moved: "I don't think I should have made such an oath with you."

What kind of person is Suzhi? He is so thick-skinned that he doesn't think there is anything wrong with committing a crime on such an occasion.So under my dumbfounded gaze, he actually took out a handful of red dates and stuffed one for each of us present, calling it to nourish qi and blood.

The original is this:

"Traditional Chinese medicine says that jujube is a great tonic. You may be able to practice Qigong if you eat too much. It nourishes yin and strengthens yang. It's great."

I looked at the jujube in my hand without a word, and then at Keigo Atobe, who was full of disgust but refused directly because of bad face, and couldn't help complaining: "I really don't understand how you say ordinary ingredients It’s like taking drugs.”

And it's one of your few good friends who cheated, won't your conscience hurt? !

Xueda hugged Atobe's neck, quacked like a duck and laughed a few times before slowly explaining why he came: "It's over there, I'm here to take the little assistant home."

I snorted angrily, but didn't refuse.

Keigo Atobe seemed to want to avoid Suede's arm, the corners of his mouth were twitching quietly, and his eyebrows were almost wrinkled.After Xuzhi finished speaking, he began to gnaw on the dates, his stupid look was almost blinding, I looked away contemptuously, and found that Qi Mu was still looking at me.

"Anything else?" I asked politely.

He didn't speak, and shook his head after a long while. It seemed that his whole body was darkened, and even his shoulders were drooping.

Xu Zhi glanced at Qi Mu with some meaning, then continued to grin like a treasure, showing two rows of big white teeth.I couldn't see it, and directly elbowed him in the stomach: "What are you laughing at?"

"..." Xu Moumou obediently kept his mouth shut.

Immediately, I found that Keigo Atobe looked at me with the eyes of a good friend. I gave a thumbs up and smiled confidently. At this moment, we have reached a certain consensus.

After returning to the venue, I found the place where the matcha cake was placed under the introduction of Suede. I happily took one and ate it. As a result, within a few minutes, another group of people gathered around me and Suede. stuck in the middle.

——Didn't you say the show is over?

I signaled Suede with my eyes.

——Is it really over?

Suede's eyes were full of bewilderment.

"Hehe, Xuzhi." Zhang Yunmu put the wine glass he hadn't drunk a few times back on the table, smiling gracefully and quietly, but the corners of his eyes were twitching non-stop, "I can ask you how you usually take care of my little Hei?" Yes, she has lost 2.07kg!"

I almost spit out the cake in my mouth, and looked at the orange-haired young man who couldn't argue with everyone's eyes with a wooden face.

"Eh?! Me, she..." Xuzhi's eyes widened, with an expression that was completely out of the ordinary.

Eating the cake silently, I no longer want to pay attention to these people.

Zhang Yun slapped the table angrily: "You really have a guilty conscience! You girl thief!"

"What's that! It sounds like the same name as the flower picker!" Xu Zhi complained with his hips on his hips.

There was still unopened orange juice on the table, so I took a bottle and opened the ring to drink it naturally.

"Stop arguing with Xueda, and you, Zhang Yunmu." Keigo Atobe stood at the farthest side with disgust, arms crossed, "Are you elementary school students?"

I nodded in agreement and put on a disgusted face.

"She's lost weight? This guy can eat five meals a day!" Suzhi stretched out his palm exaggeratedly, "And supper! My company is going to be eaten and closed!"

"Shut up, you! I don't know you bastard who is full of lies!" Zhang Yunmu waved his hand away.

I twitched the corners of my mouth, drooping dead fish eyes and didn't want to speak, took another sip of orange juice.

Suede chuckled, and instead revealed the girl's dark history: "Who ever said that——Kego Atobe has always been humble and never narcissistic, and Kunimitsu Tezuka is gentle, kind, and amiable..."

"It all happened many years ago. Besides, I was practicing lying at that time. It's not that I didn't have experience so I started from people around me."

Atobe's face turned black, and he opened his mouth probably to stop the two people from continuing to quarrel.

Me: "Gulu Gulu..."

Everyone: "Don't drink anymore!!!"

Putting down the can, I looked around calmly, passing the faces of these people one by one, and after a while, I choked out a sentence: "What should I say, just pretend nothing happened at this time."

As he spoke, he smiled confidently, and casually took out the jujube that Xuzhi had just stuffed from his pocket, and handed it to Zhang Yunmu.

Zhang Yunmu: "..."

The short-haired girl looked at the red dates handed over and fell into silence. This is no longer pretending that nothing happened!This is completely forced to change the subject!Besides, who would bring red dates at the reception!

Zhang Yunmu gnawed a jujube with a complicated expression.

"Is there anything else you want to eat?" someone asked behind him.

Turning his head, he saw Akashi Seijuro holding a tray filled with various small cakes.With his sudden smiling gaze and deliberately slowed-down gentle voice, the gap between his words was easily controlled.

I froze for a few seconds, then smiled at him: "Thank you."

The surroundings suddenly became quiet, and the voices of people became quieter. Zhang Yunmu didn't even gnaw on the dates, and his face didn't look very good.She lowered her arms and took a step forward to block me. Even though she was shorter than the red-haired young man, her momentum was not inferior at all: "What do you mean?"

The bright red eyes in front of him were noble and lazy like a Persian cat. After he looked away from me, his eyes suddenly became oppressive as he stared at Zhang Yun, and his tone returned to calm: "It's you As expected."

"The difference in treatment is really obvious."

I heard someone mutter something in a low voice, turned my head to look over, and found that it was Asano who was leaning against the wall. He noticed my gaze, immediately evoked a short smile, and then became expressionless again.

Zhang Yunmu didn't pay attention to the others, but straightened his back and raised his head unabated: "Really, what if I say that I absolutely don't support it."

"But she likes it." There was an inaudible chuckle in the voice of the red-haired young man, he casually glanced towards me, his eyes gently sinking.

"... Tsk." Zhang Yun turned his head away, looking slightly displeased, "Anyway, Wu Yue and I will not compromise."

Frowning, I looked at her and then at Akashi, I silently took a strawberry flavored cake from the tray, and continued to eat, as expected, it was safest not to speak.

"Little assistant, what the hell are you doing——" Suzhi suddenly held my shoulder and shook it desperately, with a look of hatred for iron.I was baffled by the shock, and I put the bitten strawberry cake into Sue's mouth without changing hands.

"your#@*&"

"Can you talk properly?" The corners of my eyes twitched.

The orange-haired young man swallowed the food in his mouth and looked at me with a sad face: "My lips are bleeding."

I subconsciously raised my hand and rubbed it with my index finger, and when I looked down, there was indeed a bright red liquid: "Thank you for reminding me."

"It's still swollen."

"……Oh."

The atmosphere became weird.

Suzhi seemed to have just realized it, and suddenly started searching for something around, looking around and muttering: "No, where did that guy go? He was still there just now..."

"Who are you looking for?" I couldn't help asking.

"That pink guy, didn't he still hold your rose in his hand?"

—Ah, roses.

I forgot all about it. I don’t know when it disappeared. So it was taken away by Mr. Qi Mu.

"It's over, it's over, how do I explain to Ghost Lantern." Xu Zhi pressed his temple, drooping his head with a bitter face.

Zhang Yun frowned: "What do you explain?"

I suddenly had an ominous premonition, and before I could stop it, I heard that idiot Xueda blurt out: "Nonsense, of course it's about the little assistant being kissed by an inexplicable guy again!"

"..."

Holding my forehead without saying a word, I sighed a long time, and stared into the void with my dead fish eyes.

——Sueda, why do you talk so much, you really deserve the beating.